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a day in the life of a Snail: an original XO Choose Your Own Adventure Novel

You don't have any work today because you basically only wor...
multi-colored slippery useless brakes state
  12/29/15
b!
light patrolman shrine
  12/29/15
C
Smoky bonkers address ratface
  12/29/15
...
Big Clown
  12/29/15
c
puce bbw
  12/29/15
a
Swashbuckling multi-billionaire round eye
  12/29/15
a
Insecure coffee pot hominid
  12/29/15
Next chapter please
light patrolman shrine
  12/29/15
I can', A & B ar tied :(
multi-colored slippery useless brakes state
  12/29/15
...
Big Clown
  12/29/15
Fine I change my vote to A.
light patrolman shrine
  12/29/15
a provides nutrition and wont let you starve
sienna crawly keepsake machete location
  12/29/15
...
Big Clown
  12/29/15
?
sienna crawly keepsake machete location
  12/29/15
...
Big Clown
  12/29/15
You lug the turkey chili home as you wonder what it would fe...
multi-colored slippery useless brakes state
  12/29/15
...
Big Clown
  12/29/15
c for sure
sienna crawly keepsake machete location
  12/29/15
C
Insecure coffee pot hominid
  12/29/15
c
Tan Crusty Gaping Gas Station
  12/29/15
Xo
Smoky bonkers address ratface
  12/29/15
chaturbate
twisted razzmatazz toaster temple
  12/30/15
C!
light patrolman shrine
  12/29/15
NEXT CHAPTER
light patrolman shrine
  12/29/15
everyone in this thread unzips.
twinkling university athletic conference
  12/29/15
...
Big Clown
  12/29/15
...
Smoky bonkers address ratface
  12/29/15
Did they turn off Snailmo's electricity?
Tan Crusty Gaping Gas Station
  12/29/15
no, i think he found a job, and a girlfriend
Appetizing Old Irish Cottage
  12/29/15
lol ouch
Disrespectful Garnet Pit
  12/30/15
he is busy doing tinychat
sienna crawly keepsake machete location
  12/29/15
...
umber floppy stage
  12/30/15
...
Big Clown
  12/30/15
Topic has amazing potential.
brass heaven mother
  12/30/15
You log into chaturbate in order to watch a session of some ...
multi-colored slippery useless brakes state
  12/30/15
2
Disrespectful Garnet Pit
  12/30/15
I choose 2, sounds like a great opportunity to bash BOOMER s...
brass heaven mother
  12/30/15
police
twisted razzmatazz toaster temple
  12/30/15
1
Insecure coffee pot hominid
  12/30/15
lol r u like a genderfuluid snail or sth
Smoky bonkers address ratface
  12/30/15
...
Smoky bonkers address ratface
  01/02/16
4 and 180
Tan Crusty Gaping Gas Station
  12/30/15
Wake up and post please.
Tan Crusty Gaping Gas Station
  12/30/15
...
Smoky bonkers address ratface
  12/30/15
18000000000000000000000000000000000
fantasy-prone thirsty filthpig area
  01/11/16
...
Nudist Silver Cumskin
  11/05/20
next chapter please!
canary misanthropic whorehouse pocket flask
  11/05/20
...
Dark Chapel
  12/13/25
...
180 bronze meetinghouse hissy fit
  11/05/20


Poast new message in this thread



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 9:54 PM
Author: multi-colored slippery useless brakes state

You don't have any work today because you basically only work two days out of seven at most. Instead, you are at the local grocery store, pondering how to use your EBT card.

Snow falls to the ground outside as you wish you could drink yourself silly, fall into a snow pile, and never wake up. The store has a pungent odor that one naturally associates with inner-city grocery stores.

Everything in the store reminds you that CAPITALISM is bullshit FRAUD AND LIES where proles fucking SCAVENGE to live when faggot parasite bankers and lawyers and eating out to celebrate RAPING this country and everyone in it. Kill all elites by tearing their limbs off with horses and their families too.

Anyways, you only have enough remaining on your EBT to purchase one of the three products on sale:

a) six cans of turkey chili

b) two liters of diet coke

c) a bunch of bananas

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2).#29480960)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 9:56 PM
Author: light patrolman shrine

b!

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2).#29480979)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 11:15 PM
Author: Smoky bonkers address ratface

C

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2).#29481594)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 9:55 PM
Author: Big Clown



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2).#29480970)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 9:56 PM
Author: puce bbw

c

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2).#29480973)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 9:56 PM
Author: Swashbuckling multi-billionaire round eye

a

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2).#29480975)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 9:57 PM
Author: Insecure coffee pot hominid

a

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2).#29480989)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 10:11 PM
Author: light patrolman shrine

Next chapter please

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2).#29481133)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 10:15 PM
Author: multi-colored slippery useless brakes state

I can', A & B ar tied :(

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2).#29481164)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 10:20 PM
Author: Big Clown



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2).#29481212)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 10:21 PM
Author: light patrolman shrine

Fine I change my vote to A.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2).#29481216)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 10:22 PM
Author: sienna crawly keepsake machete location

a

provides nutrition and wont let you starve

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2).#29481222)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 10:23 PM
Author: Big Clown



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2).#29481225)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 10:30 PM
Author: sienna crawly keepsake machete location

?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2).#29481285)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 10:31 PM
Author: Big Clown



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2).#29481289)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 10:30 PM
Author: multi-colored slippery useless brakes state

You lug the turkey chili home as you wonder what it would feel like if you shoved it all up your ass. Your death would be a slightly less humiliating than your actual "life".

Once you get home, you throw it all and start smacking it open with your broken can opener. It's broken because you got it from the Dollar Tree a year ago and you use it all the fucking time because you're too fucking depressed to cook FUCK OBAMA'S AMERICA.

After microwaving it, you douse it in tabasco sauce that you STOLE from Chipotle because LLJL fuck those shitlib faggots, it's so 180 to go at peak hour and just fucking steal sauce. You hope you get arrested one day because at least jail provides life structure.

While eating, you have four tabs open on the computer. None of them are XO. Which do you go on while eating your SHITchili

a) facebook

b) ashemaletv

c) chaturbate

d) drudgereport

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2).#29481288)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 10:31 PM
Author: Big Clown



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2).#29481296)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 10:32 PM
Author: sienna crawly keepsake machete location

c for sure

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2).#29481299)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 10:33 PM
Author: Insecure coffee pot hominid

C

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2).#29481311)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 10:56 PM
Author: Tan Crusty Gaping Gas Station

c

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2).#29481436)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 11:16 PM
Author: Smoky bonkers address ratface

Xo

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2).#29481600)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 30th, 2015 12:58 AM
Author: twisted razzmatazz toaster temple

chaturbate

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2).#29482189)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 10:31 PM
Author: light patrolman shrine

C!

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2).#29481291)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 10:51 PM
Author: light patrolman shrine

NEXT CHAPTER

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2).#29481403)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 11:00 PM
Author: twinkling university athletic conference

everyone in this thread unzips.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2).#29481469)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 11:15 PM
Author: Big Clown



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2).#29481596)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 11:14 PM
Author: Smoky bonkers address ratface



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2).#29481589)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 11:33 PM
Author: Tan Crusty Gaping Gas Station

Did they turn off Snailmo's electricity?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2).#29481713)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 11:39 PM
Author: Appetizing Old Irish Cottage

no, i think he found a job, and a girlfriend

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2).#29481748)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 30th, 2015 12:41 AM
Author: Disrespectful Garnet Pit

lol ouch

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2).#29482097)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 11:47 PM
Author: sienna crawly keepsake machete location

he is busy doing tinychat

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2).#29481804)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 30th, 2015 12:38 AM
Author: umber floppy stage



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2).#29482070)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 30th, 2015 12:39 AM
Author: Big Clown



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2).#29482079)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 30th, 2015 12:40 AM
Author: brass heaven mother

Topic has amazing potential.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2).#29482091)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 30th, 2015 1:01 AM
Author: multi-colored slippery useless brakes state

You log into chaturbate in order to watch a session of some dude that you've been following since you found his pictures on a /pol/ thread describing how DEGENERATE transexuals are. JFC shitlibs are really disgusting just trying to shove all of this trans shit down our throat. fuck Obama, we should drag out all media FAGGOTS from their home like that 180000 scene in the Dark Knight Arises where Bane39 takes over Gotham.

You shovel turkey chili in your mouth and you can't help stop thinking about Benzo's asshole and retching, so you put it away for a bit.

Instead, you decide to FURIOUSLY stroke your SPERMWYRM to the long-haired crossdresser on the stream as he seductively WIGGLES his puckered BUTTHOLE.

It is enjoyable and you can see the light at the end of the tunnel, until something horrifying pops out of his shirt. He has BREASTS now. Your wyrm reddens and shrinkens as you realize that he is now identifying as a "she" and has become taking hormones. In disgust, you throw off your Beats!(tm) headphones (they were a gift) and close the window. You zip up your pants angrily as yet another fine day RUINED by libs.

You decide to research more possible career paths that you will never accomplish while you finish your chili. What do you research?

1) Military

2) Police

3) Education

4) Computer Science

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2).#29482203)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 30th, 2015 1:03 AM
Author: Disrespectful Garnet Pit

2

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2).#29482210)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 30th, 2015 1:03 AM
Author: brass heaven mother

I choose 2, sounds like a great opportunity to bash BOOMER scum.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2).#29482211)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 30th, 2015 1:08 AM
Author: twisted razzmatazz toaster temple

police

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2).#29482227)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 30th, 2015 1:09 AM
Author: Insecure coffee pot hominid

1

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2).#29482232)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 30th, 2015 1:49 AM
Author: Smoky bonkers address ratface

lol r u like a genderfuluid snail or sth

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2).#29482337)



Reply Favorite

Date: January 2nd, 2016 2:50 PM
Author: Smoky bonkers address ratface



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2).#29505583)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 30th, 2015 2:02 AM
Author: Tan Crusty Gaping Gas Station

4 and 180

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2).#29482377)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 30th, 2015 11:26 AM
Author: Tan Crusty Gaping Gas Station

Wake up and post please.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2).#29483717)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 30th, 2015 11:10 PM
Author: Smoky bonkers address ratface



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2).#29488970)



Reply Favorite

Date: January 11th, 2016 10:55 AM
Author: fantasy-prone thirsty filthpig area

18000000000000000000000000000000000

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2).#29570485)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 5th, 2020 8:16 AM
Author: Nudist Silver Cumskin



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2).#41284039)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 5th, 2020 8:22 AM
Author: canary misanthropic whorehouse pocket flask

next chapter please!

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2).#41284068)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 13th, 2025 2:14 AM
Author: Dark Chapel



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2).#49506318)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 5th, 2020 8:34 AM
Author: 180 bronze meetinghouse hissy fit



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2).#41284137)