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Hypo: $800k per dairy cow who lives in your house for the next year
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Date: December 24th, 2025 3:03 PM Author: red vivacious area ratface For every full grown, black and white Wisconsin dairy cow who lives in your house for the next 365 days, you will earn $800k tax free.
Each cow must spend the entirety of the next 365 days on the main floor of your man residence.
You cannot hire help. Friends and family may help if they're inclined.
You may have vet and hoof cleaners up to 10 times during the year for your cows.
You may make minor modifications to your house, like installing a fan or putting down a tarp. No major home updates.
For each cow that reaches the 365th day in good shape, you earn $800k tax free. You must choose now. No prep time.
Are you in? How many cows? |
Date: December 24th, 2025 3:19 PM Author: Sepia athletic conference can I stay at friends house while 5 cows live in my kitchen? (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5813834&forum_id=2/#49537437) |
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Date: December 24th, 2025 5:27 PM Author: red vivacious area ratface Good question. No. You need to keep living at home. You can go to work or take vacations for a couple weeks.
Are you in? |
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Date: December 24th, 2025 5:28 PM Author: Sepia athletic conference yes and make it 6 cows (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5813834&forum_id=2/#49537729) |
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Date: December 24th, 2025 5:30 PM Author: red vivacious area ratface 180. Are you confident you make it through the year with all 6 in good health? (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5813834&forum_id=2/#49537735) |
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Date: December 24th, 2025 5:36 PM Author: Sepia athletic conference absolutely. we use to have a ginger cow called Whiskers. She purred so loud and enjoyed playing with yarn. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5813834&forum_id=2/#49537755) |
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Date: December 24th, 2025 5:37 PM Author: red vivacious area ratface So you're an expert cattleman. Why stop at 6?
Did she ever go in the house? |
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Date: December 24th, 2025 3:24 PM Author: Histrionic mexican They're going to need a drinking trough and a feeding trough. Does installing those count as a major modification? I suppose I could use the bath as one of those |
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Date: December 24th, 2025 5:29 PM Author: red vivacious area ratface You can put big buckets and tubs in your house and fill them with water and feed. That's fine. Installing an elaborate milking and feeding system would be too significant.
How many cows are you in for? |
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Date: December 24th, 2025 5:32 PM Author: soul-stirring faggot firefighter Not a problem for me (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5813834&forum_id=2/#49537742) |
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Date: December 24th, 2025 3:25 PM Author: Histrionic mexican My preliminary gut feeling is that I could do 3 of these for 2.4M (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5813834&forum_id=2/#49537454) |
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Date: December 24th, 2025 5:32 PM Author: red vivacious area ratface With all due respect, 3 seems like about the worst number. All the mess of 3 cows, without the payoff of having 6 or 10.
Anyway, you're in for 3? Do you think all 3 make it to 1 year? |
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Date: December 24th, 2025 3:28 PM Author: Marvelous misunderstood cuck dog poop Does feed magically appear to do I have to go hunting for hay? Do they need to be milked or can they stop producing? (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5813834&forum_id=2/#49537463) |
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Date: December 24th, 2025 5:34 PM Author: red vivacious area ratface You have to procure feed, but you don't have to bale your own hay or whatever. You can go to the feed store.
They are producing milk and will be in great discomfort if you don't milk them. And it might be bad for their health. I don't know what the process is to get them to stop lactating, but you can go for it.
Are you in? How many cows? |
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Date: December 24th, 2025 3:40 PM Author: Ocher hell mad cow disease I know my local government prohibits large animals in residential neighborhoods. Under the hypo, are we assuming that I won't get fined and/or arrested by my local government? Or do I have to make sure that the local government doesn't find out to get my $800k? If it is the latter, I think I am going to pass on this one. I live on a tiny lot very close to my neighbors' houses, and they would quickly wonder my house always smells like cow shit. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5813834&forum_id=2/#49537489) |
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Date: December 24th, 2025 5:30 PM Author: razzle-dazzle gold regret hominid (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5813834&forum_id=2/#49537737) |
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Date: December 24th, 2025 5:36 PM Author: red vivacious area ratface All fines, evictions, TROs, injunctions to get rid of the cows, etc will be stayed for the duration of the hypo. After that, it's on you to fight/pay/deal with any of the foregoing. Are you in? (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5813834&forum_id=2/#49537756) |
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Date: December 24th, 2025 5:48 PM Author: razzle-dazzle gold regret hominid Assuming no legal issues with my town - I could do 2-3 cows. I could do quite a few more if I were an asshole. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5813834&forum_id=2/#49537784) |
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Date: December 24th, 2025 6:16 PM Author: red vivacious area ratface See above. Legal issues are stayed for the duration of the hypo, so you won't be ordered to remove them.
Why would more than 3 make you an asshole? In for a penny, in for a pound. |
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Date: December 24th, 2025 6:17 PM Author: obsidian locale volcanic crater I have three rabbits, so how hard can a stupid cow be?
I'll just take one, since I don't have too much space.
Also, my answer depends on the assumption that they can eat hay and don't require fresh grass.
*googles cow litter boxes* |
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Date: December 24th, 2025 7:23 PM Author: red vivacious area ratface Cows in Wisconsin aren't eating fresh grass all winter, so you should be good there.
Why stop at 1? Any number will take over and wreck your house, so you might as well do several, kind of like having kids. |
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Date: December 24th, 2025 7:42 PM Author: obsidian locale volcanic crater I wouldn't want a herd of cows trampling my rabbits.
Plus I assume a cow requires a large litter box.
I could do two or three if I had a larger main floor.
Are cows easy to train? |