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very sad (or sick!) to see shitlib women furiously masturbate to Handmaid's Tale

ohhhhh i can't believe how timely this is what a warning to ...
fragrant lake stead
  04/30/18
lmfao
onyx wild parlour
  04/30/18
Its like some William Faulkner level stream of conciousness
Pontificating odious locus
  04/30/18
...
Rough-skinned Hairraiser Theater
  06/09/19
...
Rusted Home
  10/13/20
...
Turquoise Narrow-minded Plaza
  10/28/21
...
exciting nubile piazza cuck
  04/30/18
...
sooty bbw
  04/30/18
WOKE AS FUK
Glittery massive sex offender community account
  04/30/18
...
awkward shrine crotch
  06/24/18
this is scholarship of the highest order. you are now Sir Ri...
Provocative Cowardly Mexican
  06/24/18
...
Vibrant Lilac Hell Brethren
  06/24/18
...
Duck-like Topaz Dingle Berry Marketing Idea
  06/24/18
...
irradiated twinkling stag film idiot
  10/28/21
180 Joyce
laughsome fishy puppy goyim
  06/24/18
unadulterated 180
Angry Blood Rage Masturbator
  06/24/18
...
Exhilarant black trailer park
  06/24/18
...
Floppy police squad
  06/24/18
"Binders full of women" in latest episode not flam...
fragrant lake stead
  06/09/19
YUP. It’s like they got bored of Trump references (...
Rough-skinned Hairraiser Theater
  06/09/19
...
henna temple
  06/09/19
this OP is seriously a masterpiece
onyx wild parlour
  06/09/19
...
Rusted Home
  06/09/19
...
Rusted Home
  12/01/21
...
DrakeMallardxo
  08/24/25
i'm guessing OP's name IRL is jonah
Cerise sinister shitlib
  06/09/19
this has aged exceedingly well
Angry Blood Rage Masturbator
  06/09/19
...
Rough-skinned Hairraiser Theater
  06/09/19
...
Rusted Home
  06/10/19
...
Crusty passionate hominid
  06/10/19
you're playing to your audience, fine, but this is clearly w...
excitant cordovan doctorate lettuce
  06/10/19
cr. "cock," "pound." but sometimes u ju...
Arousing coral school halford
  06/10/19
pure praise would mean his talent has nowhere else to go her...
excitant cordovan doctorate lettuce
  06/10/19
...
Rusted Home
  06/10/19
18000
stirring athletic conference corner
  06/10/19
megan mcardle i think had a good column on how ridiculous th...
ruby faggot firefighter school cafeteria
  06/10/19
John Dolan wrote the GOAT POTUS review... twenty years ago. ...
Aromatic menage dysfunction
  06/10/19
Holy shit, this is great "Handmaid’s Tale is mea...
bisexual wonderful elastic band
  06/10/19
also lol @ VCR.
Aromatic menage dysfunction
  06/10/19
This was written in 2000, but it fits in seamlessly with xo ...
bisexual wonderful elastic band
  06/10/19
This guy is an XO Ted level visionary
Crusty passionate hominid
  06/10/19
...
Fighting Trip Telephone Candlestick Maker
  06/10/19
...
Crusty passionate hominid
  06/10/19
lol, whoa
Fighting Trip Telephone Candlestick Maker
  06/10/19
holy shit "And in the meantime, what has Atwood&rsqu...
Fighting Trip Telephone Candlestick Maker
  06/10/19
...
Rusted Home
  06/10/19
...
Crusty passionate hominid
  06/10/19
whoa cr
Green Clown Digit Ratio
  06/10/19
...
iridescent karate wrinkle
  06/10/19
this is an amazing article
Arousing coral school halford
  01/23/20
!!!
irradiated twinkling stag film idiot
  10/28/21
"wretched office-worker who goes home to a cat" ...
charismatic gay wizard
  06/10/19
...
iridescent karate wrinkle
  06/10/19
“No one wants to force middle-class American women to ...
Crusty passionate hominid
  06/10/19
The eXile was an early dose of REDPILL for me even though th...
Aromatic menage dysfunction
  06/10/19
...
Fighting Trip Telephone Candlestick Maker
  06/10/19
whoah
Arousing coral school halford
  06/10/19
...
Mind-boggling meetinghouse
  06/10/19
holy shit
Green Clown Digit Ratio
  06/10/19
holy fuck
onyx wild parlour
  06/10/19
Cot damn
Rusted Home
  06/10/19
...
disrespectful umber space
  05/09/21
!!!
irradiated twinkling stag film idiot
  10/28/21
this is scholarship
aphrodisiac boiling water potus
  10/24/24
fatality
gold soul-stirring mental disorder
  06/10/19
...
henna temple
  06/10/19
Does this guy have any thoughts on MAGA?
Rough-skinned Hairraiser Theater
  06/15/19
...
mauve concupiscible pit
  10/28/21
...
irradiated twinkling stag film idiot
  10/28/21
this is so damn good I'm copy pasting the whole thing: THE ...
mauve concupiscible pit
  10/28/21
Lmao is this really the story of the show?
contagious location giraffe
  06/10/19
...
laughsome fishy puppy goyim
  06/10/19
...
Marvelous at-the-ready whorehouse trust fund
  06/10/19
...
Unhinged frozen state
  06/10/19
...
Rusted Home
  01/23/20
...
henna temple
  01/23/20
...
appetizing geriatric juggernaut property
  01/23/20
...
Rusted Home
  12/01/21
...
Green Clown Digit Ratio
  12/01/21
...
impertinent federal site dragon
  12/01/21
This and the "inside a lady's head" one are like b...
mahogany sadistic station indirect expression
  07/01/22
...
mahogany sadistic station indirect expression
  10/01/23
...
mahogany sadistic station indirect expression
  02/20/24
...
mahogany sadistic station indirect expression
  10/24/24


Poast new message in this thread



Reply Favorite

Date: April 30th, 2018 11:23 AM
Author: fragrant lake stead

ohhhhh i can't believe how timely this is what a warning to women trying to survive in trump's america so many parallels to modern america i'd never let something like that happen jonah and i already have plans to run away to canada i'd get right in those soldiers faces and tell them they can't oppress my body of course they would try to force me to be a handmaid a very powerful commander would claim me and his wife would not be as hot as me but i'd struggle i'd struggle oh yes even though they would overpower me and he'd ravage me with his big commander cock he'd pound me and pound me and there'd be nothing i could do oh no oh no but i'd scratch and claw except his wife would hold me down that bitch she'd resent me for making him cum in my womb and give him beautiful children he'd sneak me goodies and treats and show me off at jezebels that sick patriarchal bastard but jonah wouldn't be able to find me i'd have to move on and be strong and live for me and my children and eventually i'd seduce the commander so good that he helps me become his real wife and we'd have the power then so i could help people fuck trump for trying to put this in practice pretty much an owners manual for him and pence those fuckers they'll never get to fuck me

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2Ã#35949672)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 30th, 2018 11:28 AM
Author: onyx wild parlour

lmfao

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2Ã#35949690)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 30th, 2018 11:30 AM
Author: Pontificating odious locus

Its like some William Faulkner level stream of conciousness

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2Ã#35949706)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 9th, 2019 11:28 PM
Author: Rough-skinned Hairraiser Theater



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2Ã#38365108)



Reply Favorite

Date: October 13th, 2020 12:49 PM
Author: Rusted Home



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2Ã#41103220)



Reply Favorite

Date: October 28th, 2021 5:28 AM
Author: Turquoise Narrow-minded Plaza



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2Ã#43342786)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 30th, 2018 11:31 AM
Author: exciting nubile piazza cuck



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2Ã#35949712)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 30th, 2018 11:33 AM
Author: sooty bbw



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2Ã#35949736)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 30th, 2018 11:35 AM
Author: Glittery massive sex offender community account

WOKE AS FUK

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2Ã#35949749)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 24th, 2018 7:47 PM
Author: awkward shrine crotch



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2Ã#36303022)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 24th, 2018 7:48 PM
Author: Provocative Cowardly Mexican

this is scholarship of the highest order. you are now Sir Risten.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2Ã#36303030)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 24th, 2018 7:50 PM
Author: Vibrant Lilac Hell Brethren



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2Ã#36303036)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 24th, 2018 7:56 PM
Author: Duck-like Topaz Dingle Berry Marketing Idea



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2Ã#36303065)



Reply Favorite

Date: October 28th, 2021 12:18 AM
Author: irradiated twinkling stag film idiot



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2Ã#43342024)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 24th, 2018 7:53 PM
Author: laughsome fishy puppy goyim

180 Joyce

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2Ã#36303053)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 24th, 2018 7:57 PM
Author: Angry Blood Rage Masturbator

unadulterated 180

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2Ã#36303071)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 24th, 2018 7:58 PM
Author: Exhilarant black trailer park



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2Ã#36303081)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 24th, 2018 8:05 PM
Author: Floppy police squad



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2Ã#36303131)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 9th, 2019 10:31 PM
Author: fragrant lake stead

"Binders full of women" in latest episode not flame

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2Ã#38364783)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 9th, 2019 11:29 PM
Author: Rough-skinned Hairraiser Theater

YUP.

It’s like they got bored of Trump references (did you also catch the lesbian refugee demanding not to be separated from the unrelated infant she was carrying?) and so decided to throw in a Romney dig for old time’s sake.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2Ã#38365120)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 9th, 2019 10:32 PM
Author: henna temple



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2Ã#38364791)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 9th, 2019 10:36 PM
Author: onyx wild parlour

this OP is seriously a masterpiece

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2Ã#38364811)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 9th, 2019 10:40 PM
Author: Rusted Home



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2Ã#38364852)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 1st, 2021 2:31 PM
Author: Rusted Home



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2Ã#43540325)



Reply Favorite

Date: August 24th, 2025 11:59 AM
Author: DrakeMallardxo (🦆)



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2Ã#49208954)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 9th, 2019 10:39 PM
Author: Cerise sinister shitlib

i'm guessing OP's name IRL is jonah

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2Ã#38364835)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 9th, 2019 10:52 PM
Author: Angry Blood Rage Masturbator

this has aged exceedingly well

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2Ã#38364924)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 9th, 2019 11:30 PM
Author: Rough-skinned Hairraiser Theater



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2Ã#38365122)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 10th, 2019 12:01 PM
Author: Rusted Home



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2Ã#38366924)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 10th, 2019 3:40 PM
Author: Crusty passionate hominid



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2Ã#38368355)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 10th, 2019 12:05 PM
Author: excitant cordovan doctorate lettuce

you're playing to your audience, fine, but this is clearly written by a man

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2Ã#38366957)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 10th, 2019 3:33 PM
Author: Arousing coral school halford

cr. "cock," "pound." but sometimes u just let it slide you know?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2Ã#38368292)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 10th, 2019 4:34 PM
Author: excitant cordovan doctorate lettuce

pure praise would mean his talent has nowhere else to go here

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2Ã#38368687)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 10th, 2019 3:16 PM
Author: Rusted Home



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2Ã#38368206)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 10th, 2019 3:28 PM
Author: stirring athletic conference corner

18000

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2Ã#38368272)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 10th, 2019 3:29 PM
Author: ruby faggot firefighter school cafeteria

megan mcardle i think had a good column on how ridiculous the handmaid's tale is happening! meme is

https://www.bloomberg.com/opinion/articles/2017-04-25/no-the-handmaid-s-tale-is-not-unexpectedly-timely

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2Ã#38368275)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 10th, 2019 3:33 PM
Author: Aromatic menage dysfunction

John Dolan wrote the GOAT POTUS review... twenty years ago.

http://exiledonline.com/old-exile/vault/books/review103.html

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2Ã#38368294)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 10th, 2019 3:37 PM
Author: bisexual wonderful elastic band

Holy shit, this is great

"Handmaid’s Tale is meant to reassure every wretched office-worker who goes home to a cat, a VCR, and Pizza-for-one that her life is noble and progressive."

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2Ã#38368320)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 10th, 2019 3:38 PM
Author: Aromatic menage dysfunction

also lol @ VCR.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2Ã#38368327)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 10th, 2019 3:42 PM
Author: bisexual wonderful elastic band

This was written in 2000, but it fits in seamlessly with xo themes on GC and shrewdom. A true visionary.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2Ã#38368374)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 10th, 2019 3:47 PM
Author: Crusty passionate hominid

This guy is an XO Ted level visionary

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2Ã#38368393)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 10th, 2019 3:48 PM
Author: Fighting Trip Telephone Candlestick Maker



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2Ã#38368400)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 10th, 2019 3:41 PM
Author: Crusty passionate hominid



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2Ã#38368361)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 10th, 2019 3:42 PM
Author: Fighting Trip Telephone Candlestick Maker

lol, whoa

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2Ã#38368367)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 10th, 2019 3:44 PM
Author: Fighting Trip Telephone Candlestick Maker

holy shit

"And in the meantime, what has Atwood’s Utopia done, in real political terms? It has managed to distract a whole generation of Americanized women from the real fear and awful loneliness of their office lives. In this way, Atwood’s Canada of the Spirit is, like its real-world counterpart, the good-cop tool, the quaking valet of its Vampire master, America. Atwood’s Canada offers no answer to the Americanized women whose only family is Allie MacBeal and her friends. After all, they’re not rednecks, they’re not Fundamentalists. In fact, the horrible lives of every woman who tries to live out Allie MacBeal is rendered noble by reading Handmaid’s Tale. "

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2Ã#38368382)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 10th, 2019 3:45 PM
Author: Rusted Home



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2Ã#38368388)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 10th, 2019 3:46 PM
Author: Crusty passionate hominid



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2Ã#38368391)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 10th, 2019 4:11 PM
Author: Green Clown Digit Ratio

whoa cr

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2Ã#38368548)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 10th, 2019 5:01 PM
Author: iridescent karate wrinkle



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2Ã#38368821)



Reply Favorite

Date: January 23rd, 2020 10:16 AM
Author: Arousing coral school halford

this is an amazing article

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2Ã#39475589)



Reply Favorite

Date: October 28th, 2021 12:14 AM
Author: irradiated twinkling stag film idiot

!!!

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2Ã#43341991)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 10th, 2019 3:47 PM
Author: charismatic gay wizard

"wretched office-worker who goes home to a cat"

imo this guy should get credit for identifying the modern shrew

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2Ã#38368399)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 10th, 2019 4:59 PM
Author: iridescent karate wrinkle



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2Ã#38368816)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 10th, 2019 3:45 PM
Author: Crusty passionate hominid

“No one wants to force middle-class American women to have babies. In fact, it’s almost impossible for them to contemplate having kids, because they’re terrified that it might set them back in their careers, and their rivals in the adjacent cubicles would grab their parking spaces and health plans. Nobody wants to use their bodies. That’s precisely the horror with which they live: no one wants to mate with them because in their world, every single striver must fear every other, and the sort of joint action involved in mating and rearing one’s young is impossible—laughable, a thing which only those who have abandoned the hope of A Career can contemplate. So in their minds, mating and rearing children moves down in class, becoming a thing for rednecks and (though they’ll never say this part out loud) immigrants-of-col”

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2Ã#38368389)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 10th, 2019 3:47 PM
Author: Aromatic menage dysfunction

The eXile was an early dose of REDPILL for me even though the writes are all lefty degenerates.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2Ã#38368394)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 10th, 2019 3:47 PM
Author: Fighting Trip Telephone Candlestick Maker



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2Ã#38368397)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 10th, 2019 3:58 PM
Author: Arousing coral school halford

whoah

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2Ã#38368476)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 10th, 2019 4:09 PM
Author: Mind-boggling meetinghouse



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2Ã#38368537)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 10th, 2019 4:12 PM
Author: Green Clown Digit Ratio

holy shit

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2Ã#38368558)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 10th, 2019 4:46 PM
Author: onyx wild parlour

holy fuck

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2Ã#38368731)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 10th, 2019 5:28 PM
Author: Rusted Home

Cot damn

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2Ã#38368965)



Reply Favorite

Date: May 9th, 2021 3:27 PM
Author: disrespectful umber space



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2Ã#42430424)



Reply Favorite

Date: October 28th, 2021 12:15 AM
Author: irradiated twinkling stag film idiot

!!!

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2Ã#43341997)



Reply Favorite

Date: October 24th, 2024 11:17 PM
Author: aphrodisiac boiling water potus

this is scholarship

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2Ã#48237594)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 10th, 2019 4:05 PM
Author: gold soul-stirring mental disorder

fatality

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2Ã#38368513)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 10th, 2019 5:56 PM
Author: henna temple



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2Ã#38369105)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 15th, 2019 2:37 PM
Author: Rough-skinned Hairraiser Theater

Does this guy have any thoughts on MAGA?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2Ã#38393148)



Reply Favorite

Date: October 28th, 2021 12:05 AM
Author: mauve concupiscible pit



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2Ã#43341948)



Reply Favorite

Date: October 28th, 2021 12:15 AM
Author: irradiated twinkling stag film idiot



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2Ã#43342001)



Reply Favorite

Date: October 28th, 2021 3:46 AM
Author: mauve concupiscible pit

this is so damn good I'm copy pasting the whole thing:

THE WINNER OF THE MARK DAVID CHAPMAN LITERARY PRIZE:

#1: Canadian Women ou Les Hoes Canucqois

By John Dolan

Just as I was finishing this column naming Margaret Atwood the Queen of Dunces, I heard she’d won this year’s Booker Prize. Once again, the mainstream press tries to scoop the eXile! There must be a leak somewhere in our ranks. Luckily, we have a roof which specializes in closing leaks, no matter how many fingernails or bamboo slivers it takes. Besides, what a transparent ploy, giving the Booker to Atwood! Atwood IS the Booker; she incarnates it; how can you award it to her? It’s like giving the Nobel to Nobel. Atwood is the prototype of the vaguely leftist, mainstream-feminist Commonwealth novelist for whom the Booker is reserved. Her name is legion: Barbara Kingsolver, Keri Hulme, Nadine Gordimer—these are her handmaids. Kingsolver, nominally American; Hulme, Kiwi; and Gordimer, South African white; all these are drawn like honking geese toward Atwood’s Kanada, spiritual home of all moderate-progressive white folk.

Kanada is the destination of Offred, the heroine of The Handmaid’s Tale, when she flees the Fundamentalist-ruled US. The notion that the Canadian border constitutes sanctuary might seem somewhat risible, since Ontario had considerable trouble repelling an 1867 invasion by forty-odd drunken Fenians armed with broken bottles and sticks. But Atwood refers here, not to a mere traffic jam full of Torontans smuggling home cheap VCRs, but a border between spiritual realms. Hers is a higher Canada, which exists among virtuous, slightly dim middlebrows everywhere in the world. This Greater Canada stretches from the two-square-meter bedrooms of ESL teachers in Kyoto to the jacuzzis of billionaire “progressives” in Malibu.

The scare-stories with which Atwood frigs her readers are distinguished by their foolish irrelevance. Take this alleged masterpiece, The Handmaid’s Tale. A foolish book, it depicts Hell as imagined by an anglo-Canadian mandarin: America ruled by savage uncultured Christians who not only repress all intellectual freedoms but would probably cut funding for genteel novelists. Worst of all, women in this Republic of Gilead are valued solely for their ability to bear children, restricted to the house and excluded from economic activity.

No one who knows anything about the way America works would ever really think that its rulers would want to let silly gender prejudices keep them from creating new consumers, much less let religion get in the way of productivity. The Baptist loonies are suckers to be wooed in election years, no more. They are useful as janitors in peacetime, cannon-fodder in war. Making them into the rulers of a nightmare vision of America is, by a charitable estimation, very naive. If we were to consider it less charitably, it might seem downright suspect. Atwood, who shares about 99.9% of her DNA with America’s real rulers, cannot see them at all, and so fails to notice their hegemony. As she confessed in boasting about her achievement in Handmaid’s Tale, she borrowed horror-stories about the treatment of women in loser countries like Iraq and applied them to the US. Apparently she could not see the horror which really does suffuse American life—a horror which has absolutely nothing to do with that losers’ club, Islam.

Handmaid’s Tale is meant to reassure every wretched office-worker who goes home to a cat, a VCR, and Pizza-for-one that her life is noble and progressive. Handmaid’s Tale is fun horror-fiction for women who work in the American-style cubicle-world precisely because it’s so utterly unrelated to the miseries and terrors of their own lives. No one wants to force middle-class American women to have babies. In fact, it’s almost impossible for them to contemplate having kids, because they’re terrified that it might set them back in their careers, and their rivals in the adjacent cubicles would grab their parking spaces and health plans. Nobody wants to use their bodies. That’s precisely the horror with which they live: no one wants to mate with them because in their world, every single striver must fear every other, and the sort of joint action involved in mating and rearing one’s young is impossible—laughable, a thing which only those who have abandoned the hope of A Career can contemplate. So in their minds, mating and rearing children moves down in class, becoming a thing for rednecks and (though they’ll never say this part out loud) immigrants-of-color. The desire to have children gets bounced outside oneself, onto these lesser beings, and returns, courtesy of Atwood, in demonized form, as the tyranny of procreation, family values and the Patriarchy. It’s the horror they love to fear.

And in the meantime, what has Atwood’s Utopia done, in real political terms? It has managed to distract a whole generation of Americanized women from the real fear and awful loneliness of their office lives. In this way, Atwood’s Canada of the Spirit is, like its real-world counterpart, the good-cop tool, the quaking valet of its Vampire master, America. Atwood’s Canada offers no answer to the Americanized women whose only family is Allie MacBeal and her friends. After all, they’re not rednecks, they’re not Fundamentalists. In fact, the horrible lives of every woman who tries to live out Allie MacBeal is rendered noble by reading Handmaid’s Tale.

So the owners of the cubicles rejoice in the intra-cranial vacations their slaves take in Atwood’s astral Canada. Let them crusade against the Republic of Gilead. Let them invest their wretched slaves’ lives with nobility. The real Republic of Gilead is a matter of dividends, not religion. It would never let the religious obsessions of its cannon-fodder voters interrupt the real business of America—the business carried out in the cubicles. If Allie and Margaret can scatter a cheap glitter over the walls of the cubicles, all the better.

It seems horribly apt that Atwood should win the Booker on the day Bush assumes the presidency. Atwood’s pious, dimwitted, credulous female Canada is the perfect handmaid for Bush’s under-the-table America. Their union is blessed with new offspring every day, every hour. As the coral reefs crumble, the cubicles invade. And everywhere they breed, from Kuala Lumpur to Samara, volumes of Atwood appear like Gideon Bibles at the desks of the corporate handmaids, telling them their lives are blessed.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2Ã#43342614)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 10th, 2019 3:32 PM
Author: contagious location giraffe

Lmao is this really the story of the show?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2Ã#38368289)



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Date: June 10th, 2019 4:15 PM
Author: laughsome fishy puppy goyim



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2Ã#38368575)



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Date: June 10th, 2019 4:35 PM
Author: Marvelous at-the-ready whorehouse trust fund



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2Ã#38368690)



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Date: June 10th, 2019 4:59 PM
Author: Unhinged frozen state



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2Ã#38368814)



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Date: January 23rd, 2020 10:13 AM
Author: Rusted Home



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2Ã#39475560)



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Date: January 23rd, 2020 10:13 AM
Author: henna temple



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2Ã#39475562)



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Date: January 23rd, 2020 10:13 AM
Author: appetizing geriatric juggernaut property



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2Ã#39475565)



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Date: December 1st, 2021 2:11 PM
Author: Rusted Home



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2Ã#43540168)



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Date: December 1st, 2021 2:12 PM
Author: Green Clown Digit Ratio



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2Ã#43540180)



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Date: December 1st, 2021 2:35 PM
Author: impertinent federal site dragon



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2Ã#43540344)



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Date: July 1st, 2022 10:43 AM
Author: mahogany sadistic station indirect expression

This and the "inside a lady's head" one are like bookends.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2Ã#44778169)



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Date: October 1st, 2023 8:48 PM
Author: mahogany sadistic station indirect expression



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2Ã#46870785)



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Date: February 20th, 2024 2:45 PM
Author: mahogany sadistic station indirect expression



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2Ã#47420608)



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Date: October 24th, 2024 11:06 PM
Author: mahogany sadistic station indirect expression



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2Ã#48237576)