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PROTIP: use "Websters dictionary defines..." to start ur closing

It has a reputation now as this hackneyed expression, which ...
Hilarious Ticket Booth Really Tough Guy
  04/24/15
...
doobsian indian lodge bbw
  04/24/15
...
disturbing chrome institution crotch
  04/24/15
...
Galvanic hell
  04/24/15
did this today
motley parlor
  10/22/15
"A lot changed on 9/11..."
Light Zombie-like Shrine New Version
  10/22/15
(guy who wrote a great college essay)
Curious national
  10/22/15
"Ladies and gentlemen of the jury..." *briefcase f...
Misunderstood disrespectful hospital indirect expression
  10/22/15
...
Harsh grizzly library
  10/22/15
...
Exciting gaped school
  10/08/25
(high school debate semifinalist)
Cobalt crusty wrinkle
  10/22/15
...
Hilarious Ticket Booth Really Tough Guy
  05/16/16
who the fuck was webster
Contagious jap friendly grandma
  05/16/16
Noah Webster. Just some autistic bro who really liked words
Hilarious Ticket Booth Really Tough Guy
  05/16/16
whats his moniker
Contagious jap friendly grandma
  05/16/16
CharlesXII
Hilarious Ticket Booth Really Tough Guy
  05/16/16
...
vermilion area rigpig
  12/28/16
180 advice it will hit the jury like some sort of heavy book...
burgundy nursing home
  12/28/16
"Urban dictionary defines 'STAY WOKE' as . . . "
insecure orchid alpha
  12/28/16
...
vermilion area rigpig
  11/11/20
...
lemon goal in life
  07/26/24
...
talented step-uncle's house international law enforcement agency
  10/08/25


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Reply Favorite

Date: April 24th, 2015 2:57 PM
Author: Hilarious Ticket Booth Really Tough Guy

It has a reputation now as this hackneyed expression, which is why it WORKS. The jury always perks up because it's so unexpected. Also it frames the issue very clearly: this is the plain definition, here are the facts, the facts don't match the accusation, acquittal. I literally bring a well-worn old dictionary and thump it onto the jury railing.

Prosecutors get flustered as FUCK and end up reacting to me rather than making their own case, and it makes them look gay as hell. They smirk or scoff, which makes them look like douches. They usually take time in their own closings to say something about "the defense counsel's old tricks and theatrics" but that just reminds the jury even more.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2862749&forum_id=2Ã#27751704)



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Date: April 24th, 2015 3:13 PM
Author: doobsian indian lodge bbw



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2862749&forum_id=2Ã#27751815)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 24th, 2015 3:17 PM
Author: disturbing chrome institution crotch



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2862749&forum_id=2Ã#27751846)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 24th, 2015 3:26 PM
Author: Galvanic hell



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2862749&forum_id=2Ã#27751921)



Reply Favorite

Date: October 22nd, 2015 1:59 PM
Author: motley parlor

did this today

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2862749&forum_id=2Ã#29022119)



Reply Favorite

Date: October 22nd, 2015 3:23 PM
Author: Light Zombie-like Shrine New Version

"A lot changed on 9/11..."

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2862749&forum_id=2Ã#29022597)



Reply Favorite

Date: October 22nd, 2015 3:24 PM
Author: Curious national

(guy who wrote a great college essay)

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2862749&forum_id=2Ã#29022604)



Reply Favorite

Date: October 22nd, 2015 3:25 PM
Author: Misunderstood disrespectful hospital indirect expression

"Ladies and gentlemen of the jury..." *briefcase full of dictionaries falls open*

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2862749&forum_id=2Ã#29022609)



Reply Favorite

Date: October 22nd, 2015 3:31 PM
Author: Harsh grizzly library



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2862749&forum_id=2Ã#29022646)



Reply Favorite

Date: October 8th, 2025 8:52 PM
Author: Exciting gaped school



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2862749&forum_id=2Ã#49335488)



Reply Favorite

Date: October 22nd, 2015 3:33 PM
Author: Cobalt crusty wrinkle

(high school debate semifinalist)

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2862749&forum_id=2Ã#29022657)



Reply Favorite

Date: May 16th, 2016 7:19 PM
Author: Hilarious Ticket Booth Really Tough Guy



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2862749&forum_id=2Ã#30492581)



Reply Favorite

Date: May 16th, 2016 7:20 PM
Author: Contagious jap friendly grandma

who the fuck was webster

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2862749&forum_id=2Ã#30492585)



Reply Favorite

Date: May 16th, 2016 7:25 PM
Author: Hilarious Ticket Booth Really Tough Guy

Noah Webster. Just some autistic bro who really liked words

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2862749&forum_id=2Ã#30492630)



Reply Favorite

Date: May 16th, 2016 7:27 PM
Author: Contagious jap friendly grandma

whats his moniker

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2862749&forum_id=2Ã#30492644)



Reply Favorite

Date: May 16th, 2016 7:37 PM
Author: Hilarious Ticket Booth Really Tough Guy

CharlesXII

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2862749&forum_id=2Ã#30492706)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 28th, 2016 5:17 PM
Author: vermilion area rigpig



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2862749&forum_id=2Ã#32250208)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 28th, 2016 5:18 PM
Author: burgundy nursing home

180 advice it will hit the jury like some sort of heavy book!

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2862749&forum_id=2Ã#32250216)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 28th, 2016 5:20 PM
Author: insecure orchid alpha

"Urban dictionary defines 'STAY WOKE' as . . . "

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2862749&forum_id=2Ã#32250229)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 11th, 2020 11:38 PM
Author: vermilion area rigpig



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2862749&forum_id=2Ã#41347456)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 26th, 2024 1:08 PM
Author: lemon goal in life



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2862749&forum_id=2Ã#47895234)



Reply Favorite

Date: October 8th, 2025 8:51 PM
Author: talented step-uncle's house international law enforcement agency



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2862749&forum_id=2Ã#49335487)