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My coworker was radicalized by Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles
| animeboi | 09/22/25 |
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Date: September 22nd, 2025 11:26 AM Author: animeboi (.) I've been working with this guy for about five years doing financial statement audits for an accounting firm. Based on the title of this post you're probably imaging a severely autistic guy, but he is pretty normal, albeit a bit awkward. Our cubicles are next to each other so we talk throughout the day. Usually sports, office gossip, or just meaningless shit. When i met this guy he was 100% apolitical, but over the past two years he has become a born again alt-righter via the dumbest route imaginable.
The guy has one pretty weird hobby in that he collects comic books. No one in the office other than me would know this, as he has the common sense to not let any women learn his secret. So during our daily chatting, he'll occasionally tell me what's going on in the world of comics. From what I've gathered, like ten years ago the original Ninja Turtles authors got back together to relaunch the comic and gear it towards adults again. They did about 100 issues together and the way he tells it, it's some rock solid stuff. Fun stories about fighting the Foot Clan and Shredder. Has the camp one would expect from Ninja Turtles, but it's gritty and unlike the cartoons it takes itself seriously.
Once they wrapped up the story they wanted to tell, they moved on and handed off the reigns to some chick. Here's where things get interesting. I guess this woman's resume prior to Ninja Turtles was writing a comic book about emo lesbians struggling with highschool bullying and she is ready to bring the genre to world of turtles.
It starts slowly. He mentions to me he's mad about all the gay characters being introduced. Soon i'm hearing that Raphael is suicidal because he cant hold down his furry girlfriend. Leonardo is having panic attacks at music festivals. There's a new turtle and she's an albino lesbian. My man is shellshocked. Every monthly issue is an analogue for the summer of 2020. The gay mutant characters are starting an automous zone called Mutant Town after one of them is shot by a cop. Casey Jones is talking about pronouns for an entire 20 page issue. Every month my coworker is getting angrier and angrier. Afraid that he'll see Michaelangelo get pegged next month. Afraid that Splinter will overdose on poppers. This goes on for like two or three years. He never stops buying the comic.
So I guess a lot of people were complaining on the Turtle forums about this and here the man will find his gateway. One taste of wokeness and this guy overdoses on red pills after seeing a fellow Turtle poster mention Milo (this is years after Milo had faded). Now he's listening to War Room at work. I'm hearing about BAP and Yarvin. He registered to vote for the first time because only Trump can stop this. Society is rotten and it just took 50 bad issues of TMNT for him to see it.
Anyway he's a nice guy and i find all this hilarious. |