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told female friend tonight how much i wanted to eat her out...

Date: August 22nd, 2007 2:55 AM Author: Bristol Palin's ret...
fear-inspiring den
  10/15/14
...
tan cowardly hell
  10/15/14
Well must say, that rapist wit and aggression took me by sur...
Twisted mental disorder
  10/15/14
I forgot the origin of the "phone pee dialed for 911&qu...
Amber Legal Warrant
  10/15/14
sooo good
fear-inspiring den
  10/15/14
dvp needs to chronicle his social interactions in long form ...
vengeful emerald private investor box office
  10/15/14
Always great
Pontificating hissy fit
  10/15/14
...
fear-inspiring den
  10/17/14
!!!
180 french idea he suggested depressive
  10/17/14
wtf
Racy macaca
  10/17/14
This is embarrassing
abnormal slate telephone
  10/17/14
fuck this is so good. would read again. was momentarily comp...
Black big-titted volcanic crater
  10/17/14
I thought this was lost to the ages. A spectacularly unique ...
Cheese-eating locus
  10/17/14
yeah, I've wanted to read this for so long. OP does good wor...
razzmatazz house
  10/17/14
thanks!! also been tryna spread this one if u haven't seen ...
fear-inspiring den
  10/17/14
can you find ari "the schnoz" goldberg and madelin...
maroon tattoo business firm
  11/05/14
I kind of miss when "loserfucker" was part of bort...
Razzle-dazzle light knife
  10/17/14
...
razzmatazz house
  10/26/14
...
vigorous nighttime stage
  10/26/14
...
fear-inspiring den
  11/05/14
Holy shit, this is one of the first posts I remember reading...
Heady stead doctorate
  11/05/14
Where's the follow up poast where he fucks her ragged the wh...
rose theatre
  11/05/14
oh ho!
ocher cerebral spot
  11/05/14
my favorite line
sapphire self-centered lay sex offender
  06/08/26
never caught this one until now. thnx.
excitant indirect expression roast beef
  11/05/14
...
marvelous ultramarine gay wizard
  06/06/20
...
fear-inspiring den
  02/11/22
...
fiercely-loyal step-uncle's house circlehead
  03/05/22
tyft
Shaky Crusty Hall Windowlicker
  03/05/22
...
fear-inspiring den
  06/08/26
Important bump
mind-boggling old irish cottage boltzmann
  06/08/26
...
fear-inspiring den
  06/08/26
Bristol Palin’s retarded incest baby was a 1800000 mon...
Idiotic ruddy resort
  06/08/26
...
fear-inspiring den
  06/10/26
I wonder what he's up to now
Amber Legal Warrant
  06/10/26
playing with his shoelaces and chewing on his tongue
Irate whorehouse
  06/10/26
Bristol's kid just turned 16, looks like he's ready for ince...
vibrant dull meetinghouse death wish
  06/10/26
I suspect that was gunnerattt tp
Silver Generalized Bond
  06/10/26
...
Chrome school cafeteria
  06/10/26
...
metal trust fund
  06/10/26
I find something new in this magnum opus each time. Central ...
vibrant dull meetinghouse death wish
  06/10/26
the craziness of central african nations had me lollercausti...
Filthy dragon
  06/10/26


Poast new message in this thread



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Date: October 15th, 2014 6:43 AM
Author: fear-inspiring den

Date: August 22nd, 2007 2:55 AM

Author: Bristol Palin's retarded incest baby (You keep calling me Babu. It's Singh, mother fucker.)

though i certainly intended to flirt with her, i had not seriously considered telling her that i fantasized about eating her out ( which i do) it just came up.

see she was talking to me about this loserfuck ( she actually did call him a loser) she is obsessed with for reasons she herself does not understand. he is some low level officer in the navy while she is off to the peace corps in february. she is obsessed with him but according to her he doesn't give a crap about her, just using her as a convenient booty call. she told me the guy was so vapid and beneath her and low class and emotionally cold and yada yada but that she couldn't stop thinking about him and obsessing over him etc.

she asks me what she should do and i just tell her not to get too emotional or romantic about him, since the peace corps will end all chance for a relationship and probably change the very things she finds attractive in a man.

Now at this point in time i am thinking my friend's attachment to this douche is physical. she is VERY sexual, the relationship she describes sounds like a fuck buddy relationship gone complicated, and in my head i am imagining a buff navy jock.

so i add....." if the fucking is good just use him as a living dildo ..." but the fucking ISN'T good" she exclaims . what to do you mean i ask " he doesn't care about me , even in bed he is a very selfish lover"

Now i am a virgin, but i am pretty aware of what this phrase means. not only that, but i am aware my friend loves to get eaten out, how do i know this? because she has a guide to eating out pussy on her fucking myspace. its literally the first thing you see, and its been there for at least a year.

"so he doesn''t go down on you " i tell her. she looks slightly shocked." well i know you like to get eaten out since you have a guide for it on your myspace"

she starts laughing, but after a bit she looks at me and she sya " i do love it" she says , and blushes. " he never doesit " she complains. well why would he, if he knows he can just fuck you ?

" yeah he doesn't even have to ask we just get alone and im on him,but it sucks every time!"

now this entire conversation i have had my left arm over her shoulders, this conversation has taken place in the form of conspiratorial whispers in each others ears. at this point in time i lean in. " you know that time we went dancing at passion and you had that black skirt on" " yeah" only then did i notice you have great legs ( she laughs) ever since then i have wanted to eat you out,( oh ho! she says) you don't have to do anything ( Noo she says and starts slowlly but firmly pushing me away with both hands) " you don't have to do anything just lie there and enjoy and of course tell me what yu want ( she keeps pushing me slowly away) " i won't even take off my clothes, ill put a cell phone in your hand so you can call the cops if i dosomething you don't want" ( at this point she says my name and says no firmly.)

I look at her for twenty or so seconds and then say " allright" I scoot away so there is a good 30 inches of space separating us. the next couple of minutes are somewhat awkward. but Ten minutes later we are talking like NOTHING happened.

we then continued a series of raucus and interesting conversations, even returning to the navy guy, but also discussing the peace corps the imminent start for law school for me , the craziness of central african nations. we talked for another THREE AND A HALF hours after my very explicit comeon and there was no akwardness or sign of damage to our friendhsip.

we are hanging out again on saturday.

oh and the setting was a small bar/restaurant with these little nooks and such.

and for those who are going to tell me that i came on as desperate and that i am FRIENDZONEPWNED be aware i am already aware of this . i am resigned to my fate. she was never long term girlfriend material and icertainly have no romantic feelings towards her.

she is just a funny supercool latina CGWBT. if all i can be with her is friends ill gladly take the friendship.

why can't more girls be like this? THIS is how you turn down a pass, you don't have to go ahead and make the guy asahmed that he has a cock betweeen his legs. my friend was very firm, but she did not make me feel bad or guilty or anything. learn from this girls.

( http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=675218&forum_id=2#8544713 )

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2700247&forum_id=2в#26519775)



Reply Favorite

Date: October 15th, 2014 7:00 AM
Author: tan cowardly hell



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2700247&forum_id=2в#26519788)



Reply Favorite

Date: October 15th, 2014 8:11 AM
Author: Twisted mental disorder

Well must say, that rapist wit and aggression took me by surprise.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2700247&forum_id=2в#26519900)



Reply Favorite

Date: October 15th, 2014 8:29 AM
Author: Amber Legal Warrant

I forgot the origin of the "phone pee dialed for 911" meme, thanks for the reminder. I'll just circle back when I need a quick laugh

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2700247&forum_id=2в#26519953)



Reply Favorite

Date: October 15th, 2014 3:08 PM
Author: fear-inspiring den

sooo good

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2700247&forum_id=2в#26522226)



Reply Favorite

Date: October 15th, 2014 3:09 PM
Author: vengeful emerald private investor box office

dvp needs to chronicle his social interactions in long form like this.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2700247&forum_id=2в#26522233)



Reply Favorite

Date: October 15th, 2014 3:16 PM
Author: Pontificating hissy fit

Always great

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2700247&forum_id=2в#26522297)



Reply Favorite

Date: October 17th, 2014 9:30 PM
Author: fear-inspiring den



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2700247&forum_id=2в#26538501)



Reply Favorite

Date: October 17th, 2014 9:32 PM
Author: 180 french idea he suggested depressive

!!!

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2700247&forum_id=2в#26538515)



Reply Favorite

Date: October 17th, 2014 9:32 PM
Author: Racy macaca

wtf

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2700247&forum_id=2в#26538516)



Reply Favorite

Date: October 17th, 2014 9:35 PM
Author: abnormal slate telephone

This is embarrassing

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2700247&forum_id=2в#26538531)



Reply Favorite

Date: October 17th, 2014 9:37 PM
Author: Black big-titted volcanic crater

fuck this is so good. would read again. was momentarily completely consumed by this story.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2700247&forum_id=2в#26538541)



Reply Favorite

Date: October 17th, 2014 9:42 PM
Author: Cheese-eating locus

I thought this was lost to the ages. A spectacularly unique post.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2700247&forum_id=2в#26538567)



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Date: October 17th, 2014 9:45 PM
Author: razzmatazz house

yeah, I've wanted to read this for so long. OP does good work around here.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2700247&forum_id=2в#26538588)



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Date: October 17th, 2014 9:48 PM
Author: fear-inspiring den

thanks!! also been tryna spread this one if u haven't seen http://www.xoxohth.com/thread.php?thread_id=2700246&forum_id=2

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2700247&forum_id=2в#26538619)



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Date: November 5th, 2014 9:23 AM
Author: maroon tattoo business firm

can you find ari "the schnoz" goldberg and madeline "numbah two" chen?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2700247&forum_id=2в#26653055)



Reply Favorite

Date: October 17th, 2014 9:51 PM
Author: Razzle-dazzle light knife

I kind of miss when "loserfucker" was part of bort lexicon.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2700247&forum_id=2в#26538650)



Reply Favorite

Date: October 26th, 2014 12:26 AM
Author: razzmatazz house



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2700247&forum_id=2в#26587986)



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Date: October 26th, 2014 12:26 AM
Author: vigorous nighttime stage



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2700247&forum_id=2в#26587988)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 5th, 2014 5:45 AM
Author: fear-inspiring den



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2700247&forum_id=2в#26652645)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 5th, 2014 10:29 AM
Author: Heady stead doctorate

Holy shit, this is one of the first posts I remember reading on xo. Getting a little teary eyed here.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2700247&forum_id=2в#26653282)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 5th, 2014 10:31 AM
Author: rose theatre

Where's the follow up poast where he fucks her ragged the whole weekend?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2700247&forum_id=2в#26653296)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 5th, 2014 11:18 AM
Author: ocher cerebral spot

oh ho!

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2700247&forum_id=2в#26653485)



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Date: June 8th, 2026 10:16 AM
Author: sapphire self-centered lay sex offender

my favorite line

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2700247&forum_id=2в#49922129)



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Date: November 5th, 2014 11:25 AM
Author: excitant indirect expression roast beef

never caught this one until now. thnx.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2700247&forum_id=2в#26653508)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 6th, 2020 7:53 PM
Author: marvelous ultramarine gay wizard



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2700247&forum_id=2в#40365552)



Reply Favorite

Date: February 11th, 2022 10:19 PM
Author: fear-inspiring den



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2700247&forum_id=2в#43954057)



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Date: March 5th, 2022 10:05 AM
Author: fiercely-loyal step-uncle's house circlehead



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2700247&forum_id=2в#44089135)



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Date: March 5th, 2022 10:15 AM
Author: Shaky Crusty Hall Windowlicker

tyft

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2700247&forum_id=2в#44089181)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 8th, 2026 1:20 AM
Author: fear-inspiring den



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2700247&forum_id=2в#49921834)



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Date: June 8th, 2026 1:31 AM
Author: mind-boggling old irish cottage boltzmann

Important bump

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2700247&forum_id=2в#49921844)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 8th, 2026 2:10 PM
Author: fear-inspiring den



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2700247&forum_id=2в#49922845)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 8th, 2026 2:13 PM
Author: Idiotic ruddy resort

Bristol Palin’s retarded incest baby was a 1800000 moniker

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2700247&forum_id=2в#49922870)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 10th, 2026 1:35 PM
Author: fear-inspiring den



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2700247&forum_id=2в#49927940)



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Date: June 10th, 2026 1:41 PM
Author: Amber Legal Warrant

I wonder what he's up to now

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2700247&forum_id=2в#49927942)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 10th, 2026 1:46 PM
Author: Irate whorehouse

playing with his shoelaces and chewing on his tongue

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2700247&forum_id=2в#49927950)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 10th, 2026 1:53 PM
Author: vibrant dull meetinghouse death wish

Bristol's kid just turned 16, looks like he's ready for incest with mama.

https://www.instagram.com/p/DEdwvcZOaqH/?img_index=1

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2700247&forum_id=2в#49927960)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 10th, 2026 1:57 PM
Author: Silver Generalized Bond

I suspect that was gunnerattt tp

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2700247&forum_id=2в#49927967)



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Date: June 10th, 2026 11:01 PM
Author: Chrome school cafeteria



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2700247&forum_id=2в#49929626)



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Date: June 10th, 2026 1:44 PM
Author: metal trust fund



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2700247&forum_id=2в#49927947)



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Date: June 10th, 2026 1:47 PM
Author: vibrant dull meetinghouse death wish

I find something new in this magnum opus each time. Central African nations. Amazing.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2700247&forum_id=2в#49927953)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 10th, 2026 3:03 PM
Author: Filthy dragon

the craziness of central african nations had me lollercausting hard

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2700247&forum_id=2в#49928176)