someone summarize the whole PENSIVE thing please
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Poast new message in this thread
Date: December 6th, 2005 6:27 PM Author: Ungodly Theater
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=313634&forum_id=2#4480481) |
Date: December 6th, 2005 6:45 PM Author: pea-brained trailer park
Pensive and Media Kid are both Mike Church, a recent Carleton grad and current Wisconsin grad student who started posting on the law board after the college board got tired of him.
He recently had a huge-ass mental breakdown after an all-night posting spree making fun of Joe from Caltech, the preferred target for his jealousy. You may know pensive as the guy who views human relationships as equations, believes that if a girl doesn't like him she's "unprestigious" (the corollary to this, of course, is that "nearly all women are unprestigious"!) and apparently has something called Narcissistic Personality Disorder. He believes his invention of the game called "Ambition" to be a significant achievement--on par with founding a successful business--and expends a lot of energy trolling for it on the internet, trying to plant references to it in Wikipedia, etc., without too much luck. (Refusing to believe that the game is without merit, he attributes this to un-named forces out there in cyberspace conspiring against him, making repeated reference to a bunch of people he pissed off at Carleton whom he believes are behind this.)
He promised to leave and seek mental help after his all-night ragefest (which he professed not to remember at all the next day), and he actually did briefly stop posting--as pensive, at least. Remarkably, the posting rate for "Media Kid" skyrocketed right about this time, with MK's number one topic being, of course, how misunderstood and maligned "pensive" really is.
After a few days of being subjected to this, a fed-up Carleton alum on the board who knew Mike in person from school started posting excerpts from Mike's online "User File," a Carleton web board where he often argued with people at his school, the main topics being things like his card game, why he can't get a date, and how most women are stupid compared to him. Anyway, he did this in the form of a very funny Onion column by "taking questions" and then answering them with excerpts from Mike's writing.
A few days ago Mike abandoned all pretense and started making the occasional post as pensive again. That's more or less where we stand now.
I hope I've been able to bring you up to date!
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=313634&forum_id=2#4480600) |
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Date: December 6th, 2005 7:51 PM Author: pea-brained trailer park Subject: Hi, pensive. How about I annotate it for eveyone out there, OK?
In this post, I backup EVERY SINGLE FUCKING THING I SAID, and you stop making stuff up. Thanks.
Pensive and Media Kid are both Mike Church, a recent Carleton grad and current Wisconsin grad student who started posting on the law board after the college board got tired of him, outed him--he initially denied it-- http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=163098&forum_id=1#2528449 (and pwned him repeatedly). (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=181066&forum_id=1#2774252 and below are pretty entertaining, especially GTO.)
Also, he believes he's an "objective 8.0"--and will not be told otherwise!--despite looking like this: http://www.math.wisc.edu/~apache/gallery/foto/Church.jpg see: http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=304598&forum_id=2#4371777
He recently had a huge-ass mental breakdown http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=305712&forum_id=2#4379625 after an all-night posting spree making fun of Joe from Caltech, the preferred target for his jealousy, on a thread that didn't mention him to begin with. http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=305275&forum_id=2#4374491 You may know pensive as the guy who views human relationships as equations, believes that if a girl doesn't like him she's "unprestigious" and thus insults her to her face http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=273774&forum_id=2#3989162 (the corollary to this, of course, is that "nearly all women are unprestigious"! http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=279655&forum_id=2#4058162 ) and apparently has something called Narcissistic Personality Disorder http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=294161&forum_id=2#4239031 . He believes his invention of the game called "Ambition" to be a significant achievement--on par with founding a successful business http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=291884&forum_id=2#4312448 --and expends a lot of energy trolling for it on the internet, trying to plant references to it in Wikipedia (where he was banned http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=307383&forum_id=2#4401177 ), etc., without too much luck. http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=300536&forum_id=2#4315837 (Refusing to believe that the game is without merit, he attributes this to un-named forces out there in cyberspace conspiring against him, making repeated reference to a bunch of people he pissed off at Carleton whom he believes are behind everything that goes wrong in his life. http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=163098&forum_id=1#2528962 )
He promised to leave http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=304929&forum_id=2#4369858 and seek mental help http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=305712&forum_id=2#4379818 after his all-night ragefest (which he professed not to remember at all the next day http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=305712&forum_id=2#4379625 ), and he actually did briefly stop posting--as pensive, at least. Remarkably, the posting rate for "Media Kid" skyrocketed right about this time, with MK's number one topic being, of course, how misunderstood and maligned "pensive" really is. http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=306925&forum_id=2#4395534 There was also a funny episode where "Media Kid" tried to claim that his absolutely extensive knowledge of Mike Church came from the fact that Mike was writing a book about his life, which "MK" had gotten ahold of. This idea was roundly mocked by all parties on the law board: http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=306966&forum_id=2#4395865 http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=308818&forum_id=2#4429043
After a few days of being subjected to this, and people getting frustrated http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=306628&forum_id=2#4391468 , a fed-up Carleton alum on the board who knew Mike in person from school started posting excerpts from Mike's online "User File," a Carleton web board where he often argued with people at his school, the main topics being things like his card game, why he can't get a date, and how most women are stupid compared to him. http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=307799&forum_id=2#4406857 and http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=309285&forum_id=2#4425958 Anyway, he did this in the form of a very funny Onion column by "taking questions" and then answering them with excerpts from Mike's writing. http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=307727&forum_id=2#4405637
A few days ago Mike abandoned all pretense and started making the occasional post as pensive or obvious derivatives again (see: this thread, http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=309519&forum_id=2#4429009 and similar). That's more or less where we stand now.
I hope I've been able to bring you up to date!
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=313634&forum_id=2#4481142) |
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Date: December 6th, 2005 8:05 PM Author: pea-brained trailer park
Thank you. It took some effort, but now all of the references are assembled in one place for the board's convenience.
Some of those links are actually pretty entertaining, by the way. I recommend them.
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=313634&forum_id=2#4481276) |
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Date: December 6th, 2005 8:10 PM Author: pea-brained trailer park
Thank you. I honestly do consider it a public service.
(And also, as with the above poster, recommend those links--the first one, for example, is when he was first outted by a College Board poster named Surely Funke--used to be "use a toothbrush"--who went to Carleton and recognized his posting style immediately. Later pwnage, as in Renada Deshada's work on Media Kid = pensive, is also entertaining.)
Google is amazing.
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=313634&forum_id=2#4481320) |
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Date: December 6th, 2005 8:23 PM Author: titillating burgundy meetinghouse immigrant
I'm blown away.
Incredible.
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=313634&forum_id=2#4481413) |
Date: December 6th, 2005 6:46 PM Author: diverse round eye forum
In five words:
No one cares about it anymore.
I lied. That was six.
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=313634&forum_id=2#4480609) |
Date: December 6th, 2005 7:52 PM Author: Naked wonderful hairy legs
hi pensive!
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=313634&forum_id=2#4481151) |
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Date: December 6th, 2005 8:01 PM Author: Comical legal warrant
titcr
the man likes nothing more than talking about himself
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=313634&forum_id=2#4481240) |
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Date: December 6th, 2005 8:16 PM Author: khaki pit
i'd still say he's a decent guy who is put to having to justify himself to such an unrelenting extent that it would alter anyone for the worse. when he's just allowed to participate normally among eveyone else -- and when he doesn't attempt to separate himself - he's quite funny and perceptive. something like inventing a card game is a relatively interesting pasttime. but here it's only portrayed as either idiotic (by everyone but him) or heroic.
he's constantly observing things, and does have a unique, intelligent take. for a math person, he's got an exceptional literary sensibility. it would clearly be better to have his better self around than to drive him away.
still, OTJ has done a remarkable job memorializing this moment in board history.
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=313634&forum_id=2#4481365) |
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Date: December 6th, 2005 8:37 PM Author: pea-brained trailer park
I don't think he's ever really admitted that he's bad at anything, or that any significant "flaw" in his profile is actually 100% his fault. There's an excuse for everything--like the way he insists that he would've gotten into any undergrad school in the country (despite the fact that he only applied to Harvard and about 3 other not-too-competitive places, and was rejected at Harvard), or the fact that he goes to the #13 math school (claims that people from LACs can't get any higher than that), etc.
The multiple monikers are just another example of that. His very first post on the board was under another moniker "secret21" and he denied that even after it because abundantly obvious that it was the same as pensive, who was the same as Mike Church of Carleton, etc.
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=313634&forum_id=2#4481533) |
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Date: December 6th, 2005 10:53 PM Author: deranged haunting hospital sweet tailpipe
"There's an excuse for everything--like the way he insists that he would've gotten into any undergrad school in the country (despite the fact that he only applied to Harvard and about 3 other not-too-competitive places, and was rejected at Harvard), or the fact that he goes to the #13 math school (claims that people from LACs can't get any higher than that), etc."
It's pretty much a wrap that I could have gotten into Harvard undergrad if I hadn't semi-intentionally blown the interview by admitting I didn't want to go. In any case, it doesn't matter because I was a lock on a more prestigious undergrad, Princeton, if I wanted to go. (At the time I didn't.) This was on account of knowing a top professor there who would have green-lighted me.
Students from LACs can get in higher than #13. In fact, I got into Michigan (#8) and, in a very close decision, chose Wisconsin. My reasons for this were complex and it truly was a 51/49, last-minute decision.
It is somewhat harder to get into the top 5-10 math or science departments from an LAC, but it can be done; I wasn't a strong enough applicant to do so, but I know people who would be. Anyone who wants my thoughts or advice on the matter should contact me in private and we'll chat about it.
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=313634&forum_id=2#4482999) |
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Date: December 6th, 2005 11:02 PM Author: buff faggotry
Just shut up. You've been discredited. "Pretty much a wrap"--completely laughable.
The above post pretty much lays you bare to the world, with all the cites right there for everyone to see, from the first lie (called "secret21") to the last (called "Media Kid").
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=313634&forum_id=2#4483119) |
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Date: December 6th, 2005 11:13 PM Author: buff faggotry
Use a toothbrush doesn't make posts repeatedly defending you and saying preposterous things that only you believe, all while writing in exactly the same style you do.
You really don't realize how obvious you are, do you? Back when it was "secret21," she picked you out of the crowd immediately. When you switched to "pensive," GTO and some others knew it had to be you, too. By the time you got to "Potential," "JohnTheJanitor," "Media Kid," and all of your myriad other recent monikers, essentially the entire board knew instantly that they all had to be you.
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=313634&forum_id=2#4483250) |
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Date: December 6th, 2005 11:09 PM Author: khaki pit
this probably isn't a great place to repeatedly claim to have effectively picked carleton college over harvard and princeton. but, whatever; i'd genuinely prefer to hear stuff about ambition or moe of the interestingly offbeat stories that turned up in the question&answer thread.
and credit is due for giving an entirely credible take on the choice of a grad school
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=313634&forum_id=2#4483199) |
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Date: December 7th, 2005 12:13 AM Author: deranged haunting hospital sweet tailpipe
I would still pick Carleton over Harvard.
Carleton is the top LAC in the Midwest; so if we classify schools according to model and location, it's the best in its class. Harvard loses to Princeton, Yale, and if you place MIT in the same "group", MIT too. Harvard, while hard to get into, is the mediocre college that rides on the coattails of a university that is actually great. Without Harvard University's graduate and research programs, HC wouldn't even be top 20 because its name would erode in status to that of a "merely good" New England college. So, with a choice between Harvard and Carleton, I'd pick Carleton and I'd advise anyone wanting to get a top-notch academic education to do the same.
The only thing Harvard has on Carleton is that it's somewhat harder to get into, and honestly I don't care about ~100 points in the average SAT scores (which is really the only significant difference). You can find great students at both.
Carleton vs. Princeton would be much more balanced, and a very difficult choice. At 17, I would've picked Carleton (obviously) but at 22, I honestly don't know. They're both great and intractibly different.
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=313634&forum_id=2#4483886) |
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Date: December 7th, 2005 8:29 AM Author: Comical legal warrant
"Harvard College is actually quite mediocre."
virtually no one says that but you, especially with respect to carleton.
"Do some research, n00b."
the only people he'll find who will agree with you will be other bitter rejects.
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=313634&forum_id=2#4485703) |
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Date: December 7th, 2005 11:18 AM Author: deranged haunting hospital sweet tailpipe
Wrong. Everyone elite knows that, for getting an education, Princeton is the best of the Ivies. Yale is next. Moreover, MIT is better than Harvard. Harvard is a great university, but the College has shitty morale among its students, and is basically a four-year yacht party for rich people who don't want to have to work hard (with a few hard-working kids who utterly resent the general atmosphere). There's nothing wrong with that-- for some people it's quite a valuable experience-- but it's not ideal if you want a serious academic education. For that, you want one of the "academic five": Chicago, Princeton, Swarthmore, Carleton, and I forget what the other one is (one of the LACs).
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=313634&forum_id=2#4486192) |
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Date: December 6th, 2005 8:46 PM Author: pea-brained trailer park
He didn't get into any of the top math programs. Went to a softbatch LAC for undergrad, the number 13 (yawn) school for grad school, and brags incessantly about once getting honorable mention in a math contest based on work not aligning particularly well with what is considered "real" academic math.
You put it together.
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=313634&forum_id=2#4481634) |
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Date: December 6th, 2005 9:00 PM Author: pea-brained trailer park
Yup. He thinks people from LAC's are somehow blacklisted from those kinds of programs because LAC's don't have classes that go far enough, or something. (It's basically just an excuse.)
You're way the hell more prestigious than pensive, for sure. Didn't you build a goddamn laser?
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=313634&forum_id=2#4481793) |
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Date: December 6th, 2005 9:05 PM Author: Hairraiser talking mood
I forgot about the laser thing.
That "not enough classes" thing is silly. Anyone looking at grad school from a LAC should be doing all independent study/research by senior year. If anything LAC kids have an advantage cause its easier to get a first authorship.
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=313634&forum_id=2#4481848) |
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Date: December 6th, 2005 9:24 PM Author: pea-brained trailer park
laser = pwned. pure and simple.
the rest of what you say is true too, of course.
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=313634&forum_id=2#4482046) |
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Date: December 6th, 2005 9:05 PM Author: khaki pit
"Author: Evan-2001
Extraordinary literary sensibility?"
perhaps he induces hyprbole
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=313634&forum_id=2#4481846) |
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Date: December 8th, 2005 12:08 AM Author: abnormal home
The card thing would be awesome if he didn't try to impress us with it, or constantly promote it, or constantly exaggerate its popularity and so on.
I don't know what you mean by literary sensibility, but his writing style sucks ass. I find it near impossible to suffer through his pomposity and extremely sterile way of wording things (don't call a woman outstanding and attractive...just say you wanted to bang her).
You keep saying he's great when he drops the self-promotion and such, but when the fuck does he do that? Even when he was claiming severe depression, he remarked about how prestigious mental illness is. That's absurd.
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=313634&forum_id=2#4494166)
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Date: December 8th, 2005 12:17 AM Author: deranged haunting hospital sweet tailpipe
I only brought up Ambition during the Joe Caltech flamewar, though others bring it up (usually to ridicule it) on occasion.
If I find a woman outstanding and attractive, I'll describe her that way. I agree with your comment on my writing style to the extent that I seem to lack as much range as I wish I had. I have a tendency to insist on precision and correctness from myself such a degree that my writing style becomes somewhat fustian, pedantic if you will. My speech is slightly more colloquial, but really just as bad. I only feel comfortable in one style of diction, which some receive as elevated but most as arrogant.
I didn't have severe depression; I have mild anxiety and depression, and as for "prestigious", I was trying to tie these facts into the prestige schtick, but I don't think it worked. In fact, they're reasons why I need to end the prestige schtick some time soon.
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=313634&forum_id=2#4494254) |
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Date: December 8th, 2005 4:50 AM Author: pea-brained trailer park
"I only brought up Ambition during the Joe Caltech flamewar,"
And it made you look damn stupid to do so, too. In the "real world" (you know, the one we, not you, live in) inventing a lame-ass card game ain't no Rhodes Scholarship.
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=313634&forum_id=2#4495637) |
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Date: December 8th, 2005 4:49 AM Author: pea-brained trailer park
"Even when he was claiming severe depression, he remarked about how prestigious mental illness is. That's absurd."
Yeah, he's never off his game.
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=313634&forum_id=2#4495636) |
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Date: December 8th, 2005 12:09 AM Author: abnormal home
I've managed to double post even when double posting is supposedly impossible.
Prestigious.
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=313634&forum_id=2#4494172) |
Date: December 6th, 2005 8:02 PM Author: khaki pit
"Author: Media Kid
I've already gone over this: the family is considering publishing a book concept of his, so I know a lot of the details of his life."
that has to be a candidate for the most preposterous post of all time.
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=313634&forum_id=2#4481251) |
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Date: April 27th, 2006 7:38 PM Author: Comical legal warrant
nice bump
the op should add the bit about mike harassing kaavya and then it being revealed that she also won the writing award he brags about all the time
http://www.xoxohth.com/thread.php?thread_id=406741&mc=14&forum_id=2
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=313634&forum_id=2#5666735) |
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Date: December 6th, 2005 11:18 PM Author: buff faggotry
That's actually true. But not for the reasons Mike would think.
It could definitely at least become an internet cult favorite.
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=313634&forum_id=2#4483298) |
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Date: December 7th, 2005 12:19 AM Author: buff faggotry
Note the part about not Japanese online gaming magazines, high school poetry anthologies, or student newspapers.
He's way out ahead of ya, pardner.
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=313634&forum_id=2#4483944) |
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Date: December 7th, 2005 9:01 PM Author: Appetizing dead rehab mad-dog skullcap
Those internal memos were a shoe-in for publication. If only Harvard and Princeton could see them now!
Also, "national contest anthology"?
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=313634&forum_id=2#4491726) |
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Date: December 7th, 2005 9:54 PM Author: Comical legal warrant
i believe the original criteria excluded "Japanese online gaming magazines, high school anthologies, or student newspapers."
this leaves him with only... hmm... those memos. damn. i've written some memos in my day. even interns get to write memos!
sorry pensive.
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=313634&forum_id=2#4492433) |
Date: December 6th, 2005 8:05 PM Author: Lime church building cuckoldry
my god man! job well done, 155!
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=313634&forum_id=2#4481277) |
Date: December 6th, 2005 8:30 PM Author: vigorous cuckold
http://ambition-game.blogspot.com/
it says he has a friend named Max Leibowitz at Carleton, someone facebook message him all this hilarious pensive stuff
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=313634&forum_id=2#4481469) |
Date: December 8th, 2005 1:17 AM Author: Cheese-eating Location
pensive is cool. v. smart guy too. i don't know why he began posting on this law board in the first place
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=313634&forum_id=2#4494786) |
Date: March 3rd, 2006 2:38 PM Author: Indecent fat ankles center
You fuckers should all know that this thread is the effort of one person congratulating himself under a bunch of different monikers (Old Tom Joad, can't edit me away!, et al).
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=313634&forum_id=2#5236296) |
Date: March 3rd, 2006 2:45 PM Author: khaki pit
"For that, you want one of the "academic five": Chicago, Princeton, Swarthmore, Carleton, and I forget what the other one is (one of the LACs)"
i think the fifth is muskingum, in ohio
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=313634&forum_id=2#5236358) |
Date: March 12th, 2006 8:41 PM Author: pea-brained trailer park
Bump for relevance.
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=313634&forum_id=2#5320485) |
Date: March 13th, 2006 10:24 AM Author: Cyan Razzle-dazzle Azn
Weird.
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=313634&forum_id=2#5325056) |
Date: March 13th, 2006 10:26 AM Author: Appetizing dead rehab mad-dog skullcap
mike was doing pretty well for a while. now he's back to his old tricks. :(
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=313634&forum_id=2#5325064) |
Date: March 13th, 2006 12:45 PM Author: Indecent fat ankles center
I'm amazed that people still care about this thread. Old Tom Joad's writing skills are so insufferably poor that there's really no point in reading anything he writes.
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=313634&forum_id=2#5325938) |
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Date: March 13th, 2006 1:00 PM Author: Chestnut puppy place of business
Yeah... exactly
*backs away very slowly*
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=313634&forum_id=2#5326073) |
Date: November 17th, 2006 2:12 PM Author: crawly purple karate
bump
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=313634&forum_id=2#7012547) |
Date: December 8th, 2006 4:17 AM Author: Big-titted Death Wish Parlour
Someone should update this by summarizing the past year.
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=313634&forum_id=2#7168289) |
Date: December 8th, 2006 4:26 AM Author: Beta Saffron Hunting Ground Business Firm
So he's a big joke? I had gotten the idea he was respected. But I'm incapable of understanding sarcasm and it's usage. And that is real fun, actually it's not, see what I'm talking about?
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=313634&forum_id=2#7168308) |
Date: April 21st, 2008 12:26 AM Author: Out-of-control big space preventive strike
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=313634&forum_id=2#9657875) |
Date: September 7th, 2008 12:13 AM Author: rebellious hominid
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=313634&forum_id=2#10134136) |
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