Date: December 3rd, 2012 3:51 PM Author: Domesticated resort personal credit line
How can you tell if she is hot when most of her face is covered by sunglasses? Her body looks ok for an asian I guess--meaning she at least has greater than A cups. Like I said. OK body and ok/asian face = 5.5 at best
Date: December 3rd, 2012 3:48 PM Author: very tactful yellow orchestra pit
In the UK, they don't seem to care about the order in which the words in a university's name appear. I've seen tons of references to Oxford University and University of Oxford. Ditto with Cambridge.
Date: December 3rd, 2012 3:50 PM Author: comical trust fund
Referring to it as a "marathon" session and then not telling us the precise number of hours the white dick was in the Asian pussy is a pretty big tease. Shame on them.
Date: June 15th, 2013 6:18 PM Author: well-lubricated azn
A standard marathon is around 26 or 27 miles. The average white dick is about 6 inches. Given an average thrust of once every second, that's about 276,870 seconds or 3 days, 4 hours and 55.5 minutes.
Date: December 3rd, 2012 3:56 PM Author: Arousing Disturbing Quadroon
Heh, from another column of hers:
"My other housemate told me he feels fetishized by women for being an Asian man, as women like to mess around with him because they don’t expect him to be sexually assertive. My blond friend also once told me some people aren’t attracted to blondes because they don’t think blondes are exotic enough."
Date: June 4th, 2013 1:56 PM Author: sooty aggressive business firm mad cow disease
During a recent interview for a position at a student organization, I was asked, “If you got stuck on a deserted island what are the three things you would want with you?”
Wanting to be completely honest, I answered, “I would just really want some porn.”
The other two items were a book and Bejeweled if you want to know, but obviously those items are less essential.
I have the porn habits of an adolescent boy. Whenever I have convenient breaks in my schedule, I’ll come home after class, eat a snack, watch some porn, rub one out and go back to campus. During breaks, when I spend weeks back home in Southern California with nothing to do, I’ll hole up in my room and watch videos up to five, six, seven times a day. Porn is also fun to watch recreationally when I’m not trying to get off — the full-length films with real plots and mind-blowing acting are my favorite.
There are many varieties and ways of accessing pornographic videos. There are options to stream, download or torrent videos from countless outlets offering XXX content. There are private companies that require a membership fee for their content, but the quality of expensive premium porn is usually worth it. Most people frequent free porn sites where you can simply stream videos uploaded by other people.
Due to the sheer amount and variety of porn, there should be something for everyone to get off to. The general belief is that porn is mainly for men, but I know lots of ladies who love watching porn as much as I do. After all, one of every three visitors of adult websites is a woman, according to Familysafemedia.com. For those who don’t enjoy straight, mainstream porn, there are sites and companies that specifically produce erotic content for women, queer and LGBT persons.
I previously thought porn only consisted of 15-to-1 gangbangs and German dungeon sex, which is terrifying. But a friend got me into porn one day when I was Skyping with him and he immediately started sending me links to naughty videos he was absolutely positive that I would enjoy.
It turned out I do love watching porn — I just wasn’t watching the right stuff. Aside from the hardcore, patriarchal content, there are great videos that simply feature attractive people having sex. It’s fun to watch sexy people do sexy things in super sexy mansions in San Fernando.
But porn generally has a bad reputation because it’s believed to be a dirty habit that’s reserved only for extreme perverts and boys experiencing puberty. It’s not the guilty pleasure I readily admit to during icebreakers in discussion sections, since people tend to associate pornography with fetishes and sex addiction. Public disapproval of porn also derives from the general stigma against the habit of masturbating.
There are definitely many problematic aspects of porn, with its wide availability on the Internet today. The world of Internet porn is a jungle where one wrong click can lead you to watch the scariest scene of your life. Pornography is largely catered toward men, which in turn eroticizes male dominance. It is an appealing form of sexual education for young people who are unaware that such sexual content may be sexist and unsafe. The tags and categories in porn impose sexual characteristics on specific races, genders and sexual orientations. There’s a lot of misogynistic, violent and disturbing crap out there.
But I doubt all 42.7 percent of Internet users who view porn do so because they endorse sexual violence and misogyny.
There isn’t anything unnatural or anything to be ashamed of in watching porn. If you like having sex, there’s a good chance that you’ll like watching it too. It’s the safest way to experiment with sexual boundaries and a great resource for discovering new things that you didn’t previously find erotic. Porn makes it possible to enjoy and be turned on by sexual novelties without actually engaging in sex.
It’s important to recognize that sex in pornography is not always an accurate depiction of sex in real life. Unless it’s consensual, chicks aren’t pining to be called derogatory names, physically dominated or ejaculated on. Videos tend to skip over the crucial but awkward parts, like putting on a condom or having an actual conversation with the person you’re having sex with about consent. Pornography is essentially just like the movies — but you cannot allow what you see on screen to become what you expect in real-life situations.
Porn can be used in constructive and beneficial ways to enhance your sexuality and lifestyle overall, and it also allows for the possibility of sexual activity and satisfaction during times of solitude. It’s convenient to get off whenever and for however long I want to without setting time aside or having to cater to someone else’s needs. However, procras-turbation does get to be a real problem sometimes, because looking at naked people is exponentially more fun to do than most of my other daily tasks and obligations.
So if you’ve ever felt like a fiend for jerking off in front of your computer too often, don’t worry: You’re definitely not the only one. Anyone who tells me that porn is a nasty habit has obviously never seen an X-Art video.
In theory, you gotta hand props to Harvard sociology teacher Patrick Hamm. The 28-year-old dude saw his chance to pwn some 20-year-old Asian cunnus and took it. Unfortunately for him, Patrick disobeyed the Prime Directive of Co-ed Cunnus Sexploitation... "If'n you're gonna be a perv, don't be a fucktard about it!"
As this clusterfuck makes clangingly obvious, Patrick Hamm Berlin violated three rules for surviving the Sexploitation of Co-Ed Cunnus:
“
Lena Chen: Did I tell you what my friends call me?
Patrick Hamm sociology: Whore whore slut?
„
—The Ch!cktionary
Of course, the girl Patrick Hamm Berlin decided to fuck had to be none other than Lena Chen, a sex-craved blogger whose blog focuses entirely on sex and, in particular, her sexual experiences. Prior to the Patrick Hamm Scandal, Lena Chen was best known for having her nude pics leaked to the internets (See Gallery, below.) Needless to say, Patrick was promptly booted from his swanky teaching position at Harvard University and had his ass deported back to Germany.
Contents
1 The Rules
1.1 Rule One: Low-Hanging Fruit is Verboten
1.2 Rule Two: Make Sure She's Worth It
1.3 Rule Three: Tough It Out
1.4 Lena Chen Gets Assbooted by Harvard (2008-2009)
2 Patrick Hamm tries to hide his crimes
3 Lena Chen, whoring for publicity, reveals her "number" is 30
4 2011 Lena Chen's Bukkake Squad!!1
5 2012: Patrick Hamm (Harvard Sociology) gets pwned AGAIN
6 2013: Lena Chen dials Waaaambulance: "I'M LEAVING AMERICA!"
7 2014 Lena Chen: "lol, nm"
7.1 Timeline of Lena Chen's Attention Whoring since March 31, 2014
8 Gallery
9 See Also
10 External Links
The Rules
"Pepper your anus, Jason Burke! Here it cums!" --Faghag Lena Chen, shortly before ramming a vodka bottle up Jason D. Burke's anus (BC College of Law)...and, of course, posting the pic on fagbook.
Rule One: Low-Hanging Fruit is Verboten
If you're gonna nail a student, make sure she never was your student! In the old days, sexing a former student would be shrugged off. But in the age of such petting-zoos as Autoadmit, you're just asking for an online fisting.
Rule Two: Make Sure She's Worth It
If you're gonna plug some 20-year-old cunnus, make sure that cunnus doesn't belong to a fat drama queen: you're just asking to get pwned when the cunnus of your eye is a sex blogger. Before you know it, she'll be:
posting about the time you throttled her until she let you sex her (a.k.a. "rape/aggressive/surprise sex").
posting photos the time Patrick Hamm drunkenly dryhumped her and squeezed Lena Chen's tiny tit on Facebook
posting a pic of the results of your splooging on her face...and adding the endearing tidbit that you "kissed her with tongue afterwards." Ew.
posting about that time you were high together and how he scored a Fake ID for you (see scroll box below).
Use scrollbar to see the full image
How Patrick Hamm (Berlin) Patrick Hamm sociology Patrick Hamm (Harvard) got fired for buying his
AsianSexDoll a fake ID, drugs, etc
You really don't want publicity like that.
Rule Three: Tough It Out
If you break the first two rules, then rest assured some petting zoo like Auto Admit is gonna find out. When they do, don't whimper like a bitch about it, claiming "outrage!".
Think about it: you fucked a loudmouth, talky, drama queen sex-blogger. Did you actually think it would remain on the q.t.? If you did, kill self and leave Harvard, because you're obviously too much of a fucktard to flourish there. Then again, he is German...
“
Patrick's cum. Ignore the slut behind it.
"Patrick Hamm kissed me right after he jizzed on my face (yes, with tongue), and then wiped my mouth off for me. Lots of people might think that’s gross. I think it’s fair.
„
—Lena Chen
Lena Chen Gets Assbooted by Harvard (2008-2009)
Lena Chen helps a student prepare for college at MyCollegeOptions
Photo Credit: Patrick Hamm Berlin
After the Patrick Clusterfuck, teh lulz continued to tumble fast and thick--just like the cum dripping from Lena Chen's lips. Little Lena was unable to suck off her profs with sufficient finesse to avert Harvard's asskicking her from the university for shitty grades.
So Lena Chen needed a job to supplement the income she received for the "services" she "rendered" Patrick. Happily, she found a dumbfuck company which had never heard of Google, a shitstain conjob called MyCollegeOptions. In addition to Lena's office talents, Lena counseled college-bound students on the importance of sucking one's way to non-sucky grades, fake IDs, and hallucinogens. Of course, the company's pisspoor wages weren't enough to cover Lena Chen's jetsetting through Europe, or even the gourmet food she habitually shovels (between bites of cock) into her massive maw. For this, Lena continued to rely on her Daddy's Platinum Card.
After an aimless year gobbling jetset food and cock, Lena threw herself at the mercy of Harvard's review board and begged them to take her back. The Dean obliged, shortly after Lena treated the campus to the most fetid gangbang in Ivy League history.
Patrick Hamm tries to hide his crimes
By 2010, mommy and daddy told Patrick Hamm to stop sucking on the family tit and GET A JOB!! So Patrick Hamm started sending out his resume...Hilarity ensued
Problem: Most employers are kinda squeamish about hiring a guy who drugged his 10-years-younger student (as Patrick Hamm did), scored her a fake ID (as Patrick Hamm did), choked said student until she spread her legs (as Patrick Hamm did), then posted a picture of his conquest's face covered with his jizz (as Patrick Hamm did).
What to do? BURY TEH EVIDENCE!! So Patrick Hamm, who's even dumb for a Nazi, bought a bunch of internet addresses and tried to spam google by swamping teh internet with fake websites which neglected to mention Patrick Hamm's weakness for fucking azn girls in his classes...
Result?? EPIC FAIL Unfortunately for Patrick Hamm, google only seems to care about NEWS websites (like this one documenting Patrick's mad sexploitation skillz) and not the ream of SPAM sites he'd begged his rich mommy and daddy to buy, like these ones:
I woke up Saturday morning with my cheek pressed into Patrick's chest and Patrick Hamm's hands softly gripping my back. My skin was sticky against Patrick's, and when I gently pulled away from him, I felt the faintest sting, as if I had peeled off a layer of myself in the process. His body had absorbed mine overnight.
I yawned and got on my side, turning away from him. I was awake, but barely, and I would’ve headed straight back into slumber if it weren’t for the three alarms — his desk lamp, his watch, and his cell phone — going off at ten minute intervals, much to my annoyance. He kept pressing snooze. Instead of deep sleep, I drifted in and out of consciousness for the next hour while he slipped one arm beneath my neck, the other around my waist, pulled me closer, and breathed into my ear. He touched his lips to my neck. I pressed my ass back against his crotch and felt him harden. We were both still half-asleep when I turned my head all the way around to kiss him. His mouth felt hot and I was hungry for it, even or maybe especially, in the morning when he tasted slightly bitter.
“You feel better?” Patrick Hamm (Berlin) asked. He pulled away and rested his fingertips on my cheek. I nodded.
“Good,” Patrick Hamm (sociology) said. “Then maybe I won’t be as nice I was last night.”
He let his hand drop, lingering at my throat to briefly encircle it. I swallowed and closed my eyes. Practically asleep again, I started to murmur something about not being in the mood.
“You what?” Patrick Hamm demanded fiercely. I jolted from my haze. His hand was back around my neck now, tighter this time. I hesitated before answering.
“I’m … tired,” I said carefully. “I don’t feel like having sex.”
“You don’t feel like it?”
He made it sound like the most inadequate explanation he’d ever heard. I shook my head. I felt like a girl.
“If you don’t feel like it,” Patrick Hamm continued. “Then you shouldn’t have woken me up by rubbing your ass against my cock and making out with me.”
Patrick Hamm (sociology) had a wicked look on his face, the same one he had when he dragged me around his living room by the hair and forced my head down on his cock so hard that I had to strain to catch my breath. He didn’t have to say a word and I knew I was fucked. I was going to be fucked by Patrick Hamm.
“I’m sorry,” I whispered.
His grip tightened.
Patrick Hamm's grip tightened, and I started to gasp for breath. Even though sex had been the very last thing on my mind when we went to bed, I couldn’t help getting wet from the feel of his hands around my neck. By the time he forced open my mouth with his cock, I was eager to spread my legs for him. He always pushed it a little deeper than what I could comfortably take. He was more than halfway down my throat when I couldn’t stand it anymore and had to pull away. Patrick Hamm asked me if I wanted him to fuck me and I nodded yes.
Date: June 15th, 2013 4:37 PM Author: sooty aggressive business firm mad cow disease
The Cheater’s Manifesto (The Case for Non-Monogamy)
11 Jun
The Manifesto: A list of thoughts cheaters may have to justify their shitty actions
I’m drunk. This person is hot. You’re not here.
Feeling sexually attracted to another person does not mean I’m no longer attracted to my partner or that my partner is any less attractive in general.
I am not with my partner solely because he/she/ze (from now on “they/them/their” will be used to represent all gender pronouns) refuses to have sex with anyone else except for me. Sexual exclusivity is not the foundation of my romantic relationships.
Having sex with other people does not affect my commitment to providing love and support for my partner as I always have and will continue to do.
I preserve the right to be spontaneous and act according to my own desires if it makes me happy.
My partner does not own me and nobody has the right to dictate my behavior and be the sole focus of my thoughts and actions at all times.
But in the end I know I’m fucking up and when this blows up shit will hit the fan and there’s going to be hurt feelings all over.
These thoughts don’t actually justify lying to and deceiving one’s partner. But they do elicit questions about how much people prioritize absolute monogamy and whether sexual exclusivity is actually all that important in creating happy relationships.
Cheating is hard to talk about. It’s a sensitive topic, as being cheated on can be very painful and devastating. Cheating is a transgression of boundaries and trust in a relationship, monogamous or non-monogamous. In a monogamous relationship, any romantic, emotional, sexual or even mental involvement with a third party can be considered cheating. In a non-monogamous relationship this isn’t always the case.
In a recent conversation with an intoxicated comrade I said “if you ever get cheated on, you shouldn’t take it personally,” which subsequently brought on intense, drunken backlash because “IT’S SOOO PERSONAL, HOW CAN YOU NOT TAKE IT SERIOUSLY?!” By “don’t take it personally,” I mean don’t blame yourself or your perceived shortcomings for the inconsiderate actions of your partner. There are a host of psychological, biological and evolutionary reasons for why people pursue sex with others while they are in relationships.
Cheating is very common, unfortunately—over 50% of both men and womyn admit to have cheated in a relationship (http://www.statisticbrain.com/infidelity-statistics/). Cheating is often circumstantial—it just kind of happened because two people were in the wrong place at the wrong time and hormones were high, or it was a spontaneous event that never happened again. Cheaters may go through the trouble of having long, risky affairs because deep inside they still want to be with their primary partners and ending a long, committed relationship isn’t actually something they want to do.
People don’t usually cheat with the intention of making their partners feel bad. If anything that’s exactly what people don’t want to do (hence, don’t take it personally). Human beings’ innate attraction to excitement and variety is the pitfall of monogamy, and the most reasonable explanation for why people cheat while maintaining long-term relationships. Cheating isn’t always a consequence of individual deficiencies, as it is a desire for new, diverse experiences and wanting to feel attractive to other people. Wanting to know what it’s like to fuck different kinds of people is a high priority for lots of people before they die. Those who get offended upon finding that their partners are sexually attracted to others are just as likely to want to fuck other people too once in a while. A very impulsive mistake or the occasional craving for new thrills isn’t always a solid reason to end meaningful relationships and banish people forever.
What is unfortunate for those who pursue monogamous relationships is that cheaters have all of human sexual evolution on their side (but humans are also evolved to make hard decisions and control themselves so don’t blame evolution for hurting your partner’s feelings). My new favorite book “Sex at Dawn” by Christopher Ryan and Cacilda Jethá provides the reproductive motivations behind why men and womyn cheat in monogamous relationships. Men cheat after they’ve knocked up a wifey and pursue other cute womyn in the hopes of creating more offspring while ideally only having to financially support a few of them. Womyn secure access to a male’s economic resources for herself and her children and then go after hot, rugged guys with the hope of having kids with someone better looking than the guy who is paying for all her shit. Our primitive sexual nature is pretty depressing, and it seems that humans were conditioned to be assholes to the people we love.
It seems that human beings are engineered to want both secure, intimate relationships and sexual novelty at the same time. Hooking up with other people doesn’t mean that one has stopped caring for one’s partner, or that one is no longer committed to being in that relationship. The drama and devastation of cheating demonstrate the immense emphasis placed on sexual exclusivity in relationships, more so than the other non-sexual factors that make those relationships great. Exclusivity does not necessarily equal love and commitment and vice versa.
By being understanding of why people cheat, am I condoning lying and crossing boundaries in romantic relationships? NO. Disrespecting your partner’s boundaries and trust is not okay. Lying to your partner is never okay. But acknowledging that you have desires and sexual urges outside of your relationship is okay, (and highly encouraged) because that’s pretty common and normal. Everyone needs to be open and honest with their partners if they ever find themselves tempted to get at other people, rather than making bad choices and hoping that their partner never finds out. And in turn, partners should understand that such temptation isn’t a product of anyone’s personal faults or unattractiveness—it just happens sometimes. Cheating is terrible and shouldn’t ever happen to anyone. But if it does happen and there are still emotions and commitment among partners, they should consider whether preserving exclusivity is genuinely worth destroying relationships, families and self-esteem.
Date: June 15th, 2013 6:13 PM Author: Hairraiser idiotic menage
Do girls still they're being edgy and progressive writing Sex and the City sex columns where they talk openly about sex? Do they really think masses of people are shocked and horrified to see yet another college girl write about all the sex she has?