I saw the enticing title, "Finding the Next Google, 3 Startups," clicked, and was surprised to read about an xo poster.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=291884&forum_id=2#4211086)

My office ranked the top five and PrepMe was shut out: five 5th-place votes.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=291884&forum_id=2#4211110)

How can you possibly compare a fucking prep test company that isn't that much different from the other prep tests companies out there with some of those other high-tech companies?

I think Joe boy paid 'em off.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=291884&forum_id=2#4211116)

A more likely story with Joe is that he's one of those people who has a mediocre intellect, but hit some jackpot at a point in his life, just being lucky, that established him and led to more accolades. I've seen this happen to relatively unimpressive people, and only in middle-age do others realize how useless they are, by which point they're entrenched in some overcompensated sinecure position and can neither be fired nor wheedled into achieving more.

I would say that his "jackpot" was the perfect SAT score, coupled with having the right connections to get the book published. The perfect SAT is an accomplishment, but relatively unremarkable. His Up Your Anus book got him the PrepMe business and clientele, and PrepMe got him the Rhodes. Later, the Rhodes'll get him a job at McKinsey or the like, and that'll get him a high-paying corporate job. He'll never be great at business, because he's uncreative and terrible with people, but he'll probably never be fired, either. All this, with the only real accomplishment being a perfect SAT; other than that, he's pretty lifted. Joe Jewell is not an example of excellence, but of gilded mediocrity. Well, I spit on this polished turd.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=291884&forum_id=2#4211203)

1) I actually didn't study for the SAT, and I took the test exactly once in high school. I'm sorry to disappoint you. I probably should've prepped, to be honest, but frankly I was far too lazy and too busy. I simply did not take the whole thing very seriously at all. I did the one practice test sample that they mail out to everyone who registers, and that was IT. The night before the test I was out until late at an orchestra concert ("Carmen." It was great.) In fact, I remember that day as a red-letter day not because of anything to do with the SAT but because I happened to meet my first long-term girlfriend at the concert.

Let me just note that that's a far cry from "wasting my childhood to optimize one test." Let's be serious here--that's baseless and ridiculous.

2) I had absolutely no connections to book publishers prior to doing UYS. My mother is an elementary school teacher and my father is a small-town newspaper editor. I spent the first six years of my life living with my parents in a small apartment while they saved up for a down payment on a house. Are you getting the picture here? Basically my whole family and everyone I knew prior to going to college was in one little rural town in Michigan. (I actually like that, though. I feel geographically centered and I will never be without a home. Money can't buy that feeling.)

3) Caltech has a 30% acceptance rate for people with perfect SATs. (How do I know this? I was on the admissions committee.) Just FYI. I have no idea what they saw in me and I'm profoundly grateful to have been let in to what for me was absolutely the perfect place to spend four years, but whatever it was, it wasn't a test score.

4) I left PrepMe 100% off of my Rhodes app. There wasn't even a hint of a mention. I applied in late summer 2004, remember, and PrepMe didn't really have a full-scale launch until January 2005. There was nothing to put down, really, even if I'd wanted to. The two things are completely independent of one another. Sorry again.

5) I've never claimed PrepMe as a "prestigious" business, and it's not intended to be. It's intended to do what any other good business does: provide a valuable product in exchange for money, hopefully at a profit. So far, it does that very well, I must say. We have satisfied customers who believe our product is worth it and have referred us to others. What more do you want? It's something that (with partners) I started because I could do it in my spare time and not sacrifice any academic pursuits, and I thought it would be neat to see what being involved in a startup company was like. I fail to see why it's a point of criticism that I didn't start a biotech company. I'm not a biologist.

6) In a similar vein, I didn't take the Putnam because I'm an engineer, not a math major. I'm not sure how that's a strike against me in your eyes. I chose to pursue a few long-term research projects in my field instead because those interested me a lot more than a "contest"-style math test with little application to anything I hope to do.

7) The Joe Jewell in Arkansas plays hammered dulcimer in a folk/bluegrass type band. I'm not sure how you consider that "classical." Also, I am a classical musician, but a timpanist/percussionist, not a French horn player (French horn is, however, probably my favorite instrument to listen to). Music is a huge part of my life. This is one of many things that I do because I enjoy them and they bring me pleasure, not to build up imaginary internet prestige points to take you on (in fact, I do exactly zero things with my time to try to do that).

8) I'm not a fair judge of myself (think about that statement for awhile and maybe try to apply it to your own life), so I can't really address the comments about whether or not I'm attractive or "good with people." I will say that I have friends (both new and since childhood) and family who care about me, and have had several very meaningful and loving relationships. That's about all I ask for in that department, so I guess whatever I've got going there, it's good enough for me.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=291884&forum_id=2#4302929)

your putnam score doesn't pwn anything except perhaps other, lower, putnam scores; ambition sucks, as you've been told repeatedly; no one but you thinks the rhodes isn't prestigious; and you ARE way more of an asshole prick than esssentially anyone else on this board.

also, "smug, underaccomplished douchebag" is a phrase i think most people would associate more with yourself than joe.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=291884&forum_id=2#4305209)

I'm glad that you recognize my superior intellect, but you're otherwise way off the mark. I'm not "jealous", I'm morally outraged by this elevation of mediocrity by people who should know better, such as the Fortune editors.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=291884&forum_id=2#4211278)

We've done quite well this year. I'm not comfortable getting at all specific on financials, but it's very good for the year since the January launch, and we expect nothing but growth for 2006.

I'm sorry if you think "people" (which people?) make too much out of PrepMe. Personally, I couldn't be happier with the success we're having, I'm pretty excited to see where we'll go in the next year, and that's what matters to me. We didn't start the company to gain recognition on the internet or try to earn the respect of anyone. I've not posted any PrepMe articles on the board or even responded to any that have been posted, up to now. We do it because we like it, it's a new and exciting experience, and it's quite satisfying.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=291884&forum_id=2#4303152)

100k in earnings is good, but that isn't much for a business really. I just wonder why it is being lauded sooooo early.

You're a smart dude though, way way way smarter than I'll ever be, and I've no doubt it'll work out well. I just think some coverage is a little premature.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=291884&forum_id=2#4313037)

Assuming Joe isn't lying or massaging figures when he says they've got $100K+ in "income", the imputed NPV of the company is something like $1 Mil+, and that's assuming no future growth.

Assuming Joe managed to hold on to 50% of the equity, he's worth 500K+ in theory right now (and probably a hell of a lot more) - which is a fuck of a lot more than any of us.

It's not unreasonable to expect the income from the business to top off around $250K in a few years, and at that point it would be a nice acquisition target for PR or Kaplan, if only to get him out of the market, and Joe'd make a cool mil from that deal.

Further, he's probably got a lot of VC flowing in, in light of the publicity, so the business could really take off to develop a value of 20 Mil+. I suspect he's got the biz manager negotiating some financing deals as we speak.

Even if it fails, he may find himself running a large division at PR or Kaplan.

Running a business with any significant level of profitability and exposure is a great accomplishment, one that far surpasses the successes of any other posters on this board.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=291884&forum_id=2#4307339)

still, you're right. money talks, and there's a lot of it there, potentially.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=291884&forum_id=2#4308834)

I don't know about how many a year or anything, but it seems like you read about companies getting bought out that aren't actually even profitable yet all the time. eBay bought Skype for several billion, and Skype currently doesn't make jack, but eBay saw potential.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=291884&forum_id=2#4313127)

People who get VC funding generally get it because of the people involved moreso than the profitability of the current project (on the assumption that geniuses working together are going to make money somewhere somehow). This works out poorly sometimes, and really well other times, though obviously outright success on the level of Google is totally improbable.

VC's always want their money back, though, many times over. Companies that acquire other companies are either looking to incorporate the talent/technology or get rid of the competition, and in either case don't expect the company to make tons more than they invested like VC's would.

Or, stated more simply, I don't think Joe's company will get VC funding unless they do something revolutionary. They might get bought, but if I were managing them, I'd hold on to most of my control until I was positive I had something more profitable to do, as things seem to be going well.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=291884&forum_id=2#4313210)

Whether you call it "VC" or not just depends on your definition of what VC is. The fact is that there's a real potential for significant financing to be arranged for the business.

I'd even throw my hat in as a potential investor (of ~$100k) if not for the facts that:

1: he's probably got much bigger $ offers coming in.

2: he's probably not eager to give up too much equity.

3: all the hype might lead him to overprice the equity.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=291884&forum_id=2#4316492)

he should fetch 20 i guess, since he has growth prospects but doesnt have professional mgmt with long track records, i dont guess, and doesnt have a lot of a track record for the business either.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=291884&forum_id=2#4313107)

The guy running the business side is, from what I can tell, a pretty smart kid.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=291884&forum_id=2#4313115)

i'm not super knowledgeable about VC or acquisition of very small companies. but that's what i would think.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=291884&forum_id=2#4313192)

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=291884&forum_id=2#4316541)

When will we see you on the Apprentice?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=291884&forum_id=2#4307616)

2. When XO gets under my skin, I leave. Then I stop thinking about everyone on this forum. When I get under Joe's skin, he comes back. This only proves, beyond any doubt, that I pwn him, because he is in submission to me while I can take his shit or leave it.

3. I actually don't hate Joe Caltech that much. Pensive is half schtick. Irrational hatred for a poster of below-average-but-not-abysmal quality is fucking hilarious. It's akin to Stephen Colbert's hatred of bears. However, I don't even think about Joe Jewell aside from XO. In real life, while I dislike his personality and frown upon his PervMe business, I don't have the passionate hatred of him that I employ in the pensive schtick. In the context of XO schtick, having such irrational hatred for someone is hilarious; in real life, it would be pathetic.

4. The fact that a Rhodes Fucking Scholar started a thread about me proves an unrelated point. I am what is known by some cultural theorists as a "natural celebrity"; that is, a person who can, without even trying, magnetically attract attention and exert influence over others. I will pwn you every time you start a thread about pensive that I didn't start.

5. I am a better poster than Joe Caltech, though I have gone into indefinite remission. I am more insightful. I am a better writer than Joe Caltech. I can affect the diction of any social class, lower to upper. I exhibit culture, refinement, and prestigious diction, though I come from a middle-class background similar to Joe Caltech's. Yet I am eloquent, and he sounds like ghetto refuse. I win again. PrepMe on this, bitch.

6. Ambition >>>>> PrepMe and all you fuckers know it.

7. Later this week I am going on a second date with a very attractive woman with the type of beauty that none of you fuckers could get, except for 174, M Kid, Chauncey, Quasar, along with possibly Petro, egress and Renada. Have fun hitting on Dogshit, BlueberryPie and intrigue, loser-fuckers.

You are all PWN3D five million and thirty-eight times over every minute of my life. You cannot extinguish my prestige any more than you could put out the sun with your piss. (Hint: you can't.)

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=291884&forum_id=2#4312314)

How much money have you made off of Ambition?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=291884&forum_id=2#4312448)

Top of his class at Caltech, Michigan masters degree, published author of a book that's gone through multiple printings, Rhodes Scholar, and owner of a company that has made a lot of money, won entrepreneurial competitions, and gotten a ton of press coverage

vs.

Carleton undergrad, obscure card game "inventor," and Wikipedia troll

Seems like Joe has got you beat in both prestige and money.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=291884&forum_id=2#4313280)

You're right, I forgot his prestigious online gaming magazine publication and his college newspaper column! How could I have ever made such a gross oversight.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=291884&forum_id=2#4313457)

It is literally impossible that he got the RS without pulling strings. He is terrible with people and even I can see that. He's not well-rounded, either. This should be fucking obvious.

On the "multiple printings", take this trash elsewhere. Joe Caltech is not a talented writer. He's hardly an average writer. Given his lack of talent and creativity, we can conclude that one of the two is true: 1. His Up Your Anus opportunity was available to anyone with perfect SATs, in which case it is not terribly prestigious, or 2. He sucked cock/paid people off to get that book deal, which is even less prestigious. Conclude your own, because I don't know which of the above is accurate, and I don't want to be "libelous".

Furthermore, he paid people off in that "entrepreneurial" competition. Otherwise it is literally impossible that he would beat out a company that made a device that saves lives. Press coverage: Ever hear of the term "pocket journalist"?

So, I'm not impressed by any of this shit. Please take your low-class tastes elsewhere. The fact that you attend a good law school indicates that you have the potential to rise in life, and even excel, but if you honestly consider Joe Caltech prestigious, you're going nowhere except to the trailer park. (Okay, more accurately, you'll be a PI lawyer marketing to people who live in trailer parks.) This helped.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=291884&forum_id=2#4314417)

"he paid people off in that 'entrepreneurial' competition. Otherwise it is literally impossible that he would beat out a company that made a device that saves lives."

you'd better watch that. that's exactly the kind of solid, easily disprovable and obviously defamatory factual statement that a lawyer could nail your ass to the wall with.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=291884&forum_id=2#4314692)

It's pretty hard to believe you're really this insecure.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=291884&forum_id=2#4315613)

So your theory is that Joe's (in your eyes) awful credentials, terrible reputation derived from (gasp!) having previously published a successful book in the field, and lackluster people skills would've dragged down the business enough such that the other two partners, no matter how good they were, couldn't possibly have won on merit? Seems unlikely.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=291884&forum_id=2#4315687)

Annoyingly, Joe, self-made millionaire or not, writes very vapid prose and I suspect he picked up this kill em with kindness tone from his hare krishna lifetsyle coach. It makes you really wanna beat the bag out of him. I like you cause you are authentically immature but have great potential for magnificent corruption. I sense your sense of the asburd.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=291884&forum_id=2#4314133)

I don't think Joe Caltech is anything close to a millionaire. Anyway, even if he were, the fact is that his whole life is predicated on one test score, an impressive test score, but nothing else. That's hilariously unprestigious.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=291884&forum_id=2#4314427)

hmm. basically everything in this thread points to that NOT being the case, but whatever. you're too far off the deep end.

how about when he IS a millionaire? or wins his next big prize? or comes out with his next publication? or gets a job as a prof? or... fill in the blank. your little game of saying that somehow someone's whole life can turn golden from a perfect SAT score seriously strains credibility (it's ridiculous, since i think something like 500 people get that every year, and as joe pointed out they don't even all get into the college of their choice, LET ALONE any other benefit beyond that. no one cares about the sat after you're into college.)

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=291884&forum_id=2#4314729)

"no one cares about the sat after you're into college."

Exactly. This is why I don't find him prestigious. His perfect SAT score is the only real thing he has, and I'm not impressed. You're finally getting it.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=291884&forum_id=2#4315644)

I think I am "getting it." You have no grip on reality.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=291884&forum_id=2#4315659)

Clearly there were strings pulled for his scholarships. I won't claim to know precisely what they were, because I haven't examined the paper trail and don't have the continuing interest.

I know nothing about his girlfriend, but to get just any girlfriend is easy for anyone. I've never met her, so the only thing I know about her is that she has poor taste.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=291884&forum_id=2#4315676)

You're just surmising pulled strings because you hate him. Admit it.

Everything about Joe seems pretty damn self-consistent to an outside observer.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=291884&forum_id=2#4315720)

Big deal. I'm not impressed. Anyone can get "a girl".

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=291884&forum_id=2#4335611)

David Lat, is that you?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=291884&forum_id=2#4314425)

cracks about "social superiors" and you claim to be from a regular joe middle class stiff background. give me a fucking break.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=291884&forum_id=2#4314669)

Diagnostic Criteria

A pervasive pattern of grandiosity (in fantasy or behavior), need for admiration, and lack of empathy, beginning by early adulthood and present in a variety of contexts, as indicated by five (or more) of the following:

1. has a grandiose sense of self-importance (e.g., exaggerates achievements and talents, expects to be recognized as superior without commensurate achievements)

2. is preoccupied with fantasies of unlimited success, power, brilliance, beauty, or ideal love

3. believes that he or she is "special" and unique and can only be understood by, or should associate with, other special or high-status people (or institutions)

4. requires excessive admiration

5. has a sense of entitlement, i.e., unreasonable expectations of especially favorable treatment or automatic compliance with his or her expectations

6. is interpersonally exploitative, i.e., takes advantage of others to achieve his or her own ends

7. lacks empathy: is unwilling to recognize or identify with the feelings and needs of others

8. is often envious of others or believes that others are envious of him or her

9. shows arrogant, haughty behaviors or attitudes

http://www.mentalhealth.com/dis1/p21-pe07.html

pensive seems very solid on 8 out of 9 diagnostic criteria, with a probable on the 9th one (about manipulative behavior towards others--note all of his alternate self-supporting monikers) as well. you only need 5 to be diagnosed with the disorder.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=291884&forum_id=2#4313031)

you are textbook Narcissistic Personality Disorder. i'm not even the first (or second, or third...) person to tell you that, am i?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=291884&forum_id=2#4314653)

you are hitting poetic heights with the above post. persist, please.

PS: HIM is pussy. Turbonegro we loved until BAM MARGIERA ruined them.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=291884&forum_id=2#4316415)

2. It wasn't "spam". That claim was made by a bunch of fascist (no exaggeration; these fuckers have been tracked to right-wing political groups) loser-fuckers on Wikipedia.

Please know what you're talking about before you spread shit.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=291884&forum_id=2#4315688)

http://www.penginus.com/index.php/Talk:Invented_card_game

(In which Mike repeatedly restores a banned section about Ambition, under a variety of documented sock-puppet usernames, most of whom popped up, made one or two posts in support of Ambition, and then promptly disappeared. He is also caught in the act when he doesn't realize his IP is logged.)

http://www.penginus.com/index.php/User:Isomorphic/Minions_of_the_Church

(In which Mike's various usernames are meticulously logged by a Wikipedia admin, with additional contributions from a dozen or more other Wikipedians. check out the profiles of his sock-puppets and note how transparently similar in style and writing they all are. Things get even more laughable as various of the sockpuppets try unsuccessfully to delete the catalogue page!)

http://www.penginus.com/index.php/Talk:Carleton_College#Ambition

(In which, after having tried repeatedly to slip Ambition into a page about his college, our hero is identified as a self-promoting "problem user")

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=291884&forum_id=2#4315785)

Sir, you are prestigious talented youth. you drink for free on me if you are around LA over the holidays.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=291884&forum_id=2#4325471)

I won't be in LA over the holidays, but there's a small chance of me being in California ca. spring break, depending on where a couple friends of mine go.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=291884&forum_id=2#4328045)