http://www.pittsburghsportingnews.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/09/Miller_Park_Rev.jpg

There is a highway behind you. There is a single taxi in the parking lot with the lights on.

Do you:

A) Attempt to enter the stadium

B) Get into the taxi

C) Walk to the highway

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3025627&forum_id=2#29032568)

You are now on the first-level concourse at Miller Park. Locked up concession stands surround you. Somewhere in the distance, you hear what appears to be human voices chanting.

Do you:

A) Break into the team store, and steal some Milwaukee Brewers stuff

B) Try to go upstairs and find a luxury suite to break into

C) See if you can figure out where the chanting is coming from

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3025627&forum_id=2#29032600)

Do you:

A) Enter the third base dugout, see if you can get into the clubhouse

B) Have second thoughts about this

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3025627&forum_id=2#29032645)

You knock.

The chanting stops. You wait for what seems to be minutes, but then the door opens.

A portly, middle-aged man in a Milwaukee Brewers jersey is the only person you can see. He has a beer in his hand.

"Can I help you?", he asks

Do you:

A) Ask him about the chanting you heard

B) Say you are a visitor in town and was hoping for a tour of the stadium

C) Say you are a visitor in town and have never seen a major league clubhouse, and want to look around

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3025627&forum_id=2#29032673)

You cautiously enter the visitors dugout. You look around and don't see anything that seems to be out of the ordinary, except that there is a very odd smell.

"Let me introduce myself," the man in the jersey says. "My name is Bruno. I work here. Tonight I was just listening to some..."

you don't hear the end of the sentence, because somebody hits you in the head with a heavy object. Everything goes black.

Some time later - you don't know how long - you wake up in a cage. You don't know where you are, but it looks like a basement.

Do you:

A) Make some noise, hoping to get the attention of whoever locked you up

B) Try to escape from the cage

C) Masturbate

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3025627&forum_id=2#29032699)

"Oh god, you're a pig," he says. "This entire cage is going to have to be cleaned now. Hell, you need to be cleaned right now."

Two figures in heavy cloaks come out of the shadows, and Bruno orders them to seize you and give you a bath. They take you upstairs to what appears to be a standard single family house. They fill up a bathtub with water, put in shampoo to make a bubble bath, and force you to take off your cum-stained clothes and get in.

One of the cloaked men half-jokingly offers you a rubber duckie. You notice that, by his voice, he appears to be just a teenager.

Do you:

A) Say that you indeed want a rubber duckie

B) Ask him what exactly is going on here

C) Attempt to fight the men and escape to freedom

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3025627&forum_id=2#29032721)

Do you:

A) Line the duckies up size, from largest to smallest

B) Sing the rubber duckie song from sesame street

C) Splash around as much as you can and see how the ducks float on the waves you create

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3025627&forum_id=2#29032742)

The crying man reaches into his cloak and produces a large dagger. He quickly stabs and murders the teenager. Then, he takes off his cloak, revealing himself as a 50-ish guy with salt and pepper hair.

"My kids sing that song all the time," he says. "I can't let them kill you now, you remind me of my son. Let's get the fuck out of here."

He drags you out of the bathtub, wipes you off with a towel, and puts your clothes back on you...even the pants which are now soiled with your seminal fluid.

You get out the front door of the house, and you find yourself on a typical suburban street. Do you:

A) Keep going with the man who rescued you

B) Make a break for it, and run down the street

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3025627&forum_id=2#29032795)

You find yourself outside of a fire station. Do you:

A) Go into the fire station and report what you've seen

B) Keep running

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3025627&forum_id=2#29032850)

Do you:

A) Go into the gas station, and get some energy drinks from the convenience store

B) Go get some pizza

C) Rest on a park bench

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3025627&forum_id=2#29032917)

B) Cheese

C) Veggie Lovers

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3025627&forum_id=2#29032930)

Your serenity is disturbed when a crying boy bursts through the door. A few adults run in after him.

"Is there anyone in this pizza place who can coach a little league baseball team?", a man asks. "We need an emergency coach for today only."

Do you:

A) Volunteer to coach

B) Keep eating pizza

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3025627&forum_id=2#29032997)

Here is your roster, first with the usual starters:

Catcher - Jose, a big burly kid who was probably picked to be catcher because he is the fattest kid on the team. He hits well for power, but makes a lot of defensive miscues and baserunning errors.

First Base - Tommy, a tall lanky kid who plays this position because he can catch but can't throw. Singles hitter.

Second Base - Dante, the prototypical scrappy middle infielder in every way. Looks like he was malnourished as a small child. Slap hitter. Leads the team in stolen bases. Good with the glove.

Third Base - Aidan, the second fattest kid on the team. Is a butcher in the field but can hit the ball a long, long way.

Shortstop - Ethan, the team's all around star player. He can hit, he can field, he can run the bases well. He also has the smartest baseball IQ of anyone on the team, he understands e.g. that in certain situations there are certain parts of the field he wants to hit the ball to.

Left Field - Carlos, a talented kid who can hit for average but not power, but suffers from social anxiety disorder. He also is really hard on himself if he makes a mistake. Decent fielder, has to be because this is LL.

Center Field - Caleb. He can't hit a lick, but he is fast and fields his position well.

Right Field - Liam. He plays RF because he is a complete defensive hack. He is a mediocre hitter. He also plays the violin and you fear he is not 100% committed to the team because of his other extracurriculars.

Pitcher - Bryan. He's tall for his age and has pretty good stuff, and can hit decently. Hits a lot of balls right down the line. Has pretty poor stamina though and doesn't last more than a few innings on the mound.

And your bench:

INF - Noah, your backup corner outfielder. He is a good defender who can't hit.

INF/P - Julian, your backup shortstop who also is learning how to pitch. He's a decent fielder, but when he pitches you better have your best defenders on the field, his stuff gets put into play almost every at-bat.

OF - Julio, the team's sole left-handed player. He wants to play outfield, his baseball heroes are all outfielders, but you wonder if he's too short. This kid clearly has big baseball dreams, might love the sport more than anyone else on the team, but hits mediocrely without much power.

OF - Geoff, a fat kid with thick glasses. He can't hit at all, he's literally never gotten a hit. But he is a student of the game and understands strategy very well.

P - Jacob. A frizzy haired, bespectacled kid who idolizes Greg Maddux. He is trying to learn all the weird breaking and curving pitches, and at this level kids can't really hit that yet. But when he leaves a ball up (still often at this point) it gets crushed. When he bats, he chokes waaay up on the bat, meaning he has very little power but often hits cheap little singles.

Coach, your first game of the day is in 15 minutes. Set your lineup.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3025627&forum_id=2#29034285)

http://www.pittsburghsportingnews.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/09/Miller_Park_Rev.jpg

There is a highway behind you. There is a single taxi in the parking lot with the lights on.

Do you:

A) Attempt to enter the stadium

B) Get into the taxi

C) Walk to the highway

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3025627&forum_id=2#29032582)

"Where will it be, boss?"

A) Ask him to drive you to downtown Milwaukee

B) Ask him to drive you to the airport

C) Ask him to drive you to Chicago

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3025627&forum_id=2#29032602)

Do you:

A) Buy tickets to Duluth, MN

B) Buy tickets to Madison, WI

C) Buy tickets to Rockford, IL

D) Sleep in the airport and see what flights you can get in the morning

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3025627&forum_id=2#29032619)

Do you:

A) Go to Dunkin Donuts

B) Go find a taxi

C) Go rent a car

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3025627&forum_id=2#29032657)

A) Avis

B) Hertz

C) Budget

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3025627&forum_id=2#29032702)

You leave the Duluth Airport. You are tired. You want to lay down and sleep somewhere.

Do you:

A) Pull over and sleep in your car

B) Find a hotel in downtown Duluth

C) Find a hotel somewhere outside of Duluth

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3025627&forum_id=2#29032836)

https://envygeography.wikispaces.com/file/view/100_9547.jpg/61894350/100_9547.jpg

It is clearly past its prime, but there is some faded glory everywhere you go in this Great Lakes port town, once known as the "Zenith City". You see an old hotel, looking like it might have been built in the 1920's, a place that Al Capone might have hung out, if Al Capone would have been caught dead in a town as small as Duluth that is.

They have a room for you, and its just $112. Valet parking is just $15 a night. You hand the valet your car keys and go in to get some sleep.

You enter your room. It is musty but big. There is a TV. The envelope your keycard is in has a Wifi password.

Do you:

A) Watch TV

B) Just go straight to sleep

C) Use the wifi to poast on XO (you had a phone this whole time, but it was dead - with the electricity in the room you can charge it)

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3025627&forum_id=2#29032885)

A) read the new TT thread

B) read the new TedCruz thread

C) read the new RSF thread

D) read the new thread *about* RSF

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3025627&forum_id=2#29032906)

"You wake up in what appears to be the parking lot of a large suburban shopping center. Directly in front of you is a fully operational and open CompUSA. Odd, you think, didn't CompUSA go out of business a few years ago? Next to the CompUSA is a Blockbuster Video.

Do you:

A) Go into CompUSA

B) Go into Blockbuster"

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3025627&forum_id=2#29032945)

A) Select an option that he has actually offered to you

B) Blank bump your request to do something not offered to you, in the hopes that it will change his mind

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3025627&forum_id=2#29033004)

http://www.pittsburghsportingnews.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/09/Miller_Park_Rev.jpg

There is a highway behind you. There is a single taxi in the parking lot with the lights on.

Do you:

A) Attempt to enter the stadium

B) Get into the taxi

C) Walk to the highway

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3025627&forum_id=2#29032726)

A) End your life by walking into traffic

B) Hitchhike

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3025627&forum_id=2#29032745)

Do you:

A) Go to Minneapolis with the man

B) Ask to be dropped off in downtown Milwaukee

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3025627&forum_id=2#29032770)

He goes on and on, recounting his lost youth and telling you stories of all the things he did in his early 20's. It is still many hours to Minneapolis.

Do you:

A) Try to change the topic

B) Continue listening

C) Attempt to escape the car

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3025627&forum_id=2#29032820)

"The what?"

You explain the Hummingbird Hawk Moth to the man. He is intrigued, or at least pretends to be. Afterwards, he is much more quiet. Perhaps you creeped him out and he no longer wants to talk to you.

You arrive in Minneapolis, having driven all night. It is light outside now. The man asks if you want to have breakfast with him at his hotel.

Do you:

A) Thank him, and go into Minneapolis on your own.

B) Have breakfast with him.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3025627&forum_id=2#29032871)

https://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/e/e4/2008-0712-MPLS-panorama.JPG

It's pretty early in the morning on a Saturday, and not much is open yet. There's a McDonalds that is open and serving breakfast.

Do you:

A) Go to McDonalds by yourself

B) Keep walking, hoping to find somewhere else

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3025627&forum_id=2#29032900)

Do you:

A) Go into the diner

B) Go into the Holiday Inn

C) Keep walking

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3025627&forum_id=2#29032929)

There is a waffle station, scrambled eggs, sausages, and of course a bunch of donuts, croissants, and other pastries

Do you:

A) Get a waffle

B) Eat scrambled eggs and sausage

C) Pig out on pastries

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3025627&forum_id=2#29032950)

Do you:

A) Get a room at the Holiday Inn and go to bed

B) Just lay down on a couch in the lobby and try to sleep there

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3025627&forum_id=2#29032982)

You get to room 317 and immediately fall asleep. You wake up at 6:31 PM on a Saturday night in downtown Minneapolis.

Do you:

A) Stay inside and watch TV

B) Stay inside and poast on XO

B) Go out on the town and party

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3025627&forum_id=2#29033015)

http://d3imyo1kk0rcam.cloudfront.net/wp-content/uploads/2013/10/bbfb5eefccb33bbb93ca89f0746403921765136997.jpg

They seem interested in your strange tale of blacking out and finding yourself in Milwaukee. You end up in the position of being able to score with any of the chicks in that picture.

Please respond with a number between 1-7, with #1 being the chick at the far left (teal dress) and #7 being the chick at the far right (orange dress). Or dial "8" to get out of there and not score with any of these girls.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3025627&forum_id=2#29033036)

http://www.pittsburghsportingnews.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/09/Miller_Park_Rev.jpg

There is a highway behind you. There is a single taxi in the parking lot with the lights on.

Do you:

A) Attempt to enter the stadium

B) Get into the taxi

C) Walk to the highway

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3025627&forum_id=2#29032728)

You are now on the side of a major highway heading into Milwaukee. Do you:

A) End your life by walking into traffic

B) Hitchhike

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3025627&forum_id=2#29032760)

A middle aged man in an older-model Acura picks you up. "I haven't seen anyone hitchhiking in years," he says. "Come on in. I'm headed to Minneapolis for a conference."

Do you:

A) Go to Minneapolis with the man

B) Ask to be dropped off in downtown Milwaukee

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3025627&forum_id=2#29032797)

He goes on and on, recounting his lost youth and telling you stories of all the things he did in his early 20's. It is still many hours to Minneapolis.

Do you:

A) Try to change the topic

B) Continue listening

C) Attempt to escape the car

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3025627&forum_id=2#29032813)

http://www.pittsburghsportingnews.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/09/Miller_Park_Rev.jpg

There is a highway behind you. There is a single taxi in the parking lot with the lights on.

Do you:

A) Attempt to enter the stadium

B) Get into the taxi

C) Walk to the highway

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3025627&forum_id=2#29032752)

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3025627&forum_id=2#29032876)

http://greenstreetdowntown.com/cache/ce_img/media/site_media/lucky_hour_490_369_s.jpg

You are confused to as to how you got here. You begin walking around. You enter a nearby bar area.

http://greenstreetdowntown.com/cache/ce_img/media/site_media/lucky_hour_490_369_s.jpg

You check your pockets to see what personal effects you have on you. In the left breast of your coat, you find two loose cards. The first is a driver's license with a male face you don't recognize and the name "Lee Harvey Robinson." The second is an American Express card with the same name. In your right pant pocket, you find an iPhone 5s that is either broken or has no battery charge.

Do you:

A.) Attempt to order a drink with your ID and card.

B.) Go to the bathroom to look at your face.

C.) Ask the bartender if he has an iPhone charger behind the bar.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3025627&forum_id=2#29033027)

http://i.ytimg.com/vi/DhKJ9JvbPsc/maxresdefault.jpg

Believing you made a mistake, you reflexively turn around and attempt to exit, only to find that the door you came through is no longer there.

You spin around again to find that the woman is not only untroubled by your presence, but she is in fact walking closer to you.

http://i.ytimg.com/vi/ABubLDnAV1I/hqdefault.jpg

Do you:

A. Ask "what the hell is going on here?"

B. Stand still.

C. Ignore the woman, and walk to the toilet to relieve yourself. (#1)

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3025627&forum_id=2#29033106)

You realize everything has turned into Legos.

http://images.mocpages.com/user_images/48054/12883784271_SPLASH.jpg

All of a sudden, you feel very small. You worry that you are yourself a Lego-sized person. You look upwards to find any clue that would give you a sense of scale. You immediately see a huge hand reaching down for you.

http://betanews.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/08/reaching-hand-300x208.png

You:

A. Look for anywhere to scamper to away from the hand.

B. Stand still and await whatever fate the hand brings you.

C. Shout "WHAT THE FUCK IS HAPPENING?!?", hoping the owner of the hand will answer.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3025627&forum_id=2#29033139)

Several minutes pass as the walking continues, then you feel the cell phone in your pocket that you thought was broken or uncharged start ringing. You immediately reach down and answer it.

The familiar voice of mother is on the line.

"Son?"

You respond:

A. "HOLY SHIT MOM I DON'T KNOW WHERE I AM!"

B. "MOM I WAS JUST IN "THE SHINING" BUT IT TURNED TO LEGOS AND NOW I'M INSIDE A BIG HAND."

C. "Hey mom. Sup?"

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3025627&forum_id=2#29042987)