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WTF just happened? [pensive]

I honestly don't remember anything after 11:00 last night, a...
Aromatic Den Mood
  11/25/05
severe mental illness happened.
Concupiscible indian lodge circlehead
  11/25/05
It's something like that, yeah. Fuck.
Aromatic Den Mood
  11/25/05
awesome
talented french alpha queen of the night
  11/25/05
That could be a way to describe it. I honestly don't remembe...
Aromatic Den Mood
  11/25/05
Dude, that's kind of scary.
Glassy cerebral range knife
  11/25/05
indeed. those posts he made were very odd.
Poppy godawful whorehouse
  11/25/05
It's fucked up. I wonder if I need to end this schtick, beca...
Aromatic Den Mood
  11/25/05
Actually, I think that if you're forgetting things you've do...
Glassy cerebral range knife
  11/25/05
Seriously, thats not something to mess with.
talented french alpha queen of the night
  11/25/05
I sort of remembered stuff after I read it, in that I knew o...
Aromatic Den Mood
  11/25/05
sounds like season depression. it's common
Poppy godawful whorehouse
  11/25/05
It's not seasonal, though, because usually I do fine in wint...
Aromatic Den Mood
  11/25/05
Maybe your blood has gotten too blue.
talented french alpha queen of the night
  11/25/05
haha, zing!
Hairraiser sticky center
  11/25/05
It's interesting that you say that, because the term "b...
Aromatic Den Mood
  11/25/05
I actually think you are the person who started (mis)using i...
talented french alpha queen of the night
  11/25/05
It was 174. "My blood is bluer than the bruises you get...
Aromatic Den Mood
  11/25/05
Probably a good idea if you're unhappy, but make sure to men...
Glassy cerebral range knife
  11/25/05
Yeah, I;ve never heard of this kind of memory loss associate...
talented french alpha queen of the night
  11/25/05
Yeah, I guess I have a relative who ignored weird symptoms f...
Glassy cerebral range knife
  11/25/05
I actually knew a kid that had some of the same weird person...
talented french alpha queen of the night
  11/25/05
What does that mean, non-cancer brain tumor?
passionate peach principal's office lettuce
  11/25/05
it wasnt cancerous, it was just a growth of tissue. It happ...
talented french alpha queen of the night
  11/25/05
So what does it mean to catch it in time?
passionate peach principal's office lettuce
  11/25/05
Sometimes a tumor gets past the point where you can operate ...
Glassy cerebral range knife
  11/25/05
It would still be growing, just not capable of spreading to ...
Aromatic Den Mood
  11/25/05
it was small enough they could yank it out surgically withou...
talented french alpha queen of the night
  11/25/05
oh ok I see. thanks guys Now I have another tumor to worr...
passionate peach principal's office lettuce
  11/25/05
"Benign", as in incapable of metastasis, brain tum...
Aromatic Den Mood
  11/25/05
Yikes. My cousin was having weird hallucinations and fainti...
Glassy cerebral range knife
  11/25/05
It can happen. Depression destroys all sorts of cognitive ab...
Aromatic Den Mood
  11/25/05
It's okay time does not exist.
Chestnut Trailer Park
  11/25/05
I've heard an argument for that.
Aromatic Den Mood
  11/25/05
You really should take up my challenge not to use, nor think...
talented french alpha queen of the night
  11/25/05
agreed.
Vivacious crackhouse giraffe
  11/25/05
you might want to have that checked out
talented french alpha queen of the night
  11/25/05
Have you found any dark hair clippings in your mittens? Or ...
Hairraiser sticky center
  11/25/05
Haha let me check. All clear.
Aromatic Den Mood
  11/25/05
it's amazing that he said joe was "that type" last...
Vivacious crackhouse giraffe
  11/25/05
Well, certainly I have the math grad student bit. Other than...
Aromatic Den Mood
  11/25/05
Recall that my argument was that you are closer to Lohman in...
Hairraiser sticky center
  11/25/05
Last night was fucking weird. I hope that doesn't happen aga...
Aromatic Den Mood
  11/25/05
Lohman probably says the same thing. Of course, he's gonna b...
mind-boggling purple messiness internal respiration
  11/26/05
yes! excellent.
naked roommate feces
  11/27/05
Yikes, that's scary. In all sincerity, I hope you get this c...
passionate peach principal's office lettuce
  11/25/05
As I read over the shit, I can sort of remember typing it, a...
Aromatic Den Mood
  11/25/05
As for stupid things the night before, it could've been a lo...
passionate peach principal's office lettuce
  11/25/05
titcr. i've woken up unable to walk. twice.
Odious seedy filthpig kitty cat
  11/25/05
I literally forgot how old I was last night. 18 or 19? I h...
Crawly Kitchen Friendly Grandma
  11/25/05
Whatever it is, I hope it leads to an early and painful deat...
brass soul-stirring set incel
  11/25/05
I concur.
pale bbw therapy
  11/25/05
It's probably nothing, other than mild-moderate depression, ...
Aromatic Den Mood
  11/25/05
I hear it's most effectively treated by sucking on a loaded ...
pale bbw therapy
  11/25/05
link to odd posts?
nubile electric laser beams
  11/25/05
They weren't that odd, actually. A lot of the usual stuff, ...
Glassy cerebral range knife
  11/25/05
Hm. What's also alarming to me is the timestamps, the fact t...
Aromatic Den Mood
  11/25/05
I tried three times to take that last sentence of yours and ...
nubile electric laser beams
  11/25/05
Haha thanks.
Aromatic Den Mood
  11/25/05
in some thread about rhodes scholars. it's just a lot of obs...
Vivacious crackhouse giraffe
  11/25/05
drugs
sienna motley hell
  11/25/05
None.
Aromatic Den Mood
  11/25/05
aids?
Mint Adulterous Son Of Senegal
  11/25/05
i'd imagine that depression is a decent catalyst for art, bu...
amethyst awkward faggot firefighter base
  11/25/05
Re depression and art: That's a myth, though a widely-circul...
Aromatic Den Mood
  11/25/05
"That's a myth, though a widely-circulated one." ...
amethyst awkward faggot firefighter base
  11/25/05
Since I've often used "pensive" as a euphemism for...
Aromatic Den Mood
  11/25/05
you sound much smarter when you're not doing your "shti...
180 carmine home
  11/25/05
i second this
Odious seedy filthpig kitty cat
  11/25/05
My schtick is similar to what Media Kid was before he got si...
Aromatic Den Mood
  11/25/05
the only thing is, there are certain subjects (women/dating ...
Vivacious crackhouse giraffe
  11/25/05
I agree. Some of the ridiculous self promotion (Ambition)...
Fishy garrison
  11/25/05
The Joe Caltech hate is a schtick. I honestly don't care abo...
Aromatic Den Mood
  11/25/05
"The Joe Caltech hate is a schtick." The fuck i...
Fishy garrison
  11/25/05
titcr
yapping psychic
  11/25/05
Why would I have any reason to care about his board prestige...
Aromatic Den Mood
  11/25/05
His "board prestige" is due to real life accomplis...
Fishy garrison
  11/25/05
Aside from the Rhodes, which has a prestigious history, you'...
Aromatic Den Mood
  11/25/05
His done numerous things outside of Rhodes - he won some pre...
Fishy garrison
  11/25/05
UYA has a negative net effect on his prestige, and a huge on...
Aromatic Den Mood
  11/25/05
And this is why people think you're jealous.
Fishy garrison
  11/25/05
Of his degrees? Making a comparison between engineering and ...
Aromatic Den Mood
  11/25/05
Of his accomplishments, fucker.
Fishy garrison
  11/25/05
Writing an SAT test-prep book is not an accomplishment. Nor ...
Aromatic Den Mood
  11/25/05
Yes, coming up with names like "PoopMe" in no way ...
Fishy garrison
  11/25/05
It actually indicates contempt.
Aromatic Den Mood
  11/25/05
And envy.
Fishy garrison
  11/25/05
Wrong. Go cut yourself.
Aromatic Den Mood
  11/25/05
Says the guy whining the entire thread about his depression....
Fishy garrison
  11/25/05
I wasn't "whining", you filthy cunt. Go slit your ...
Aromatic Den Mood
  11/26/05
TITCR
mind-boggling purple messiness internal respiration
  11/26/05
Let's take a look at Joe's accomplishments: -- Caltech un...
bateful foreskin
  11/25/05
The book and PrepMe are TTT loser-fucker disasters, and I hi...
Aromatic Den Mood
  11/25/05
oh.classic.
naked roommate feces
  11/27/05
just ignore it and hope it goes away
galvanic hyperactive theatre mad cow disease
  11/25/05
Oh shut up, pensive. Talk about some hypochondria. It'...
Fishy garrison
  11/25/05
He's trying to move in on your most-fucked-up-poster territo...
Self-centered casino
  11/25/05
Mine? You mean Madame Cunt's. I am painfully normal. ...
Fishy garrison
  11/25/05
...aside from the cutting. But you do have a point.
Self-centered casino
  11/25/05
I think cutting is pretty normal - or at least self destruct...
Fishy garrison
  11/25/05
PWN3D. That was an edgy retort.
Aromatic Den Mood
  11/25/05
Seriously, get yourself locked up in a psychiatric ward for ...
Fishy garrison
  11/25/05
Sharp! You have very cutting wit. I knife... er, I mean like...
Aromatic Den Mood
  11/25/05
It wasn't meant to be witty. you just sound absolutely ab...
Fishy garrison
  11/25/05
I wasn't whining. I started the thread because I woke up wit...
Aromatic Den Mood
  11/25/05
You've been going on the entire thread about how you can no...
Fishy garrison
  11/25/05
Nah, I've had a problem before that, off and on for 6 years....
Aromatic Den Mood
  11/25/05
"Good at hiding it". Give me a break. Again,...
Fishy garrison
  11/25/05
If you don't shut up, I will take this schtick away from XO ...
Aromatic Den Mood
  11/25/05
You know, I was just about to go to bed, but in light of thi...
Fishy garrison
  11/25/05
My schtick is funnier, more prestigious, and all around bett...
Aromatic Den Mood
  11/25/05
I am not schtick.
Fishy garrison
  11/25/05
That's what they all say.
Aromatic Den Mood
  11/25/05
Didn't you "retire" last spring?
bateful foreskin
  11/25/05
Yeah, I left the college board because of all the unprestigi...
Aromatic Den Mood
  11/25/05
that's not very credible
galvanic hyperactive theatre mad cow disease
  11/25/05
Well, at least you can be sure it's not syphilis.
slate razzle multi-billionaire
  11/27/05
178
Magenta Boyish Station Degenerate
  11/27/05
...
ungodly bearded parlour
  04/08/07
It's funny how pensive was able to feign a mass nervous brea...
Excitant shrine goal in life
  04/08/07


Poast new message in this thread





Date: November 25th, 2005 3:07 PM
Author: Aromatic Den Mood

I honestly don't remember anything after 11:00 last night, and I wasn't drinking, but there are some fucking insane posts dated 2, 3 am that no one but me could have written.

This is fucked up. I'm sorry.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=305712&forum_id=2#4379625)





Date: November 25th, 2005 3:10 PM
Author: Concupiscible indian lodge circlehead

severe mental illness happened.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=305712&forum_id=2#4379640)





Date: November 25th, 2005 3:11 PM
Author: Aromatic Den Mood

It's something like that, yeah. Fuck.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=305712&forum_id=2#4379649)





Date: November 25th, 2005 3:11 PM
Author: talented french alpha queen of the night

awesome

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=305712&forum_id=2#4379651)





Date: November 25th, 2005 3:29 PM
Author: Aromatic Den Mood

That could be a way to describe it. I honestly don't remember anything that happened between about 10-11 pm yesterday and 1 pm this afternoon, when I woke up still exhausted.

This is why I always BCC myself on emails. I hate these blank spots where I do crazy shit, and I just hope I haven't done anything too damaging.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=305712&forum_id=2#4379762)





Date: November 25th, 2005 3:30 PM
Author: Glassy cerebral range knife

Dude, that's kind of scary.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=305712&forum_id=2#4379764)





Date: November 25th, 2005 3:31 PM
Author: Poppy godawful whorehouse

indeed. those posts he made were very odd.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=305712&forum_id=2#4379774)





Date: November 25th, 2005 3:32 PM
Author: Aromatic Den Mood

It's fucked up. I wonder if I need to end this schtick, because it kinda sucked me in or something.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=305712&forum_id=2#4379781)





Date: November 25th, 2005 3:33 PM
Author: Glassy cerebral range knife

Actually, I think that if you're forgetting things you've done and it's not a drunken blackout, you might want to talk to your family doctor. Could be a health issue.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=305712&forum_id=2#4379787)





Date: November 25th, 2005 3:35 PM
Author: talented french alpha queen of the night

Seriously, thats not something to mess with.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=305712&forum_id=2#4379796)





Date: November 25th, 2005 3:38 PM
Author: Aromatic Den Mood

I sort of remembered stuff after I read it, in that I knew only I could have written it, but only in bits and pieces, as if it were a dream or something. I sorta wish it were.

I'm going in to see someone next Friday about the depressive issues; I've had them since 16, they disappeared from Feb. to early October, then got really bad recently. I've never been so depressed as to literally lose memory.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=305712&forum_id=2#4379818)





Date: November 25th, 2005 3:39 PM
Author: Poppy godawful whorehouse

sounds like season depression. it's common

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=305712&forum_id=2#4379824)





Date: November 25th, 2005 3:45 PM
Author: Aromatic Den Mood

It's not seasonal, though, because usually I do fine in winter. (I've been in the North all my life.) In fact, I'm worse in summer than winter.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=305712&forum_id=2#4379855)





Date: November 25th, 2005 3:40 PM
Author: talented french alpha queen of the night

Maybe your blood has gotten too blue.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=305712&forum_id=2#4379826)





Date: November 25th, 2005 3:44 PM
Author: Hairraiser sticky center

haha, zing!

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=305712&forum_id=2#4379853)





Date: November 25th, 2005 3:52 PM
Author: Aromatic Den Mood

It's interesting that you say that, because the term "blue-blooded" has always connoted weakness. It's odd that on XO it's used as a positive, because almost nowhere else in the English-speaking world is it a compliment.

(Originally, sangre azul was a reference to the pale skin of the wealthy in southern Europe; pallor was a sign of status and with pale skin blue veins are visible. When it transported to English-speaking countries, it was associated with hemophilia and, in the US, the tendency of wealthy WASP types toward frigidity, haughtiness, extreme aloofness-- the opposite of red-bloodedness-- which does lead to an increased likelihood of mental illness... and here I am.)

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=305712&forum_id=2#4379909)





Date: November 25th, 2005 4:01 PM
Author: talented french alpha queen of the night

I actually think you are the person who started (mis)using it in this way. I never saw anyone on here use it before you. There was a lot of talk about old/new money, but no mention of blue blood.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=305712&forum_id=2#4379987)





Date: November 25th, 2005 4:03 PM
Author: Aromatic Den Mood

It was 174. "My blood is bluer than the bruises you get after being smacked by my prestigious cock." (Paraphrased.) All great XO schtick came from him (and Media Kid).

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=305712&forum_id=2#4380000)





Date: November 25th, 2005 3:40 PM
Author: Glassy cerebral range knife

Probably a good idea if you're unhappy, but make sure to mention this symptom. If it's something with a physical cause, you don't want to ignore it.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=305712&forum_id=2#4379830)





Date: November 25th, 2005 3:43 PM
Author: talented french alpha queen of the night

Yeah, I;ve never heard of this kind of memory loss associated with depression.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=305712&forum_id=2#4379849)





Date: November 25th, 2005 3:46 PM
Author: Glassy cerebral range knife

Yeah, I guess I have a relative who ignored weird symptoms for a long time, and found out it was something serious.

I'm sure that pensive doesn't have anything wrong, but that's not the kind of thing you fuck around with.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=305712&forum_id=2#4379859)





Date: November 25th, 2005 3:50 PM
Author: talented french alpha queen of the night

I actually knew a kid that had some of the same weird personality traits as pensive. He started having night terrors and sleep walking and stuff. Turned out he had a non-cancer brain tumor. They caught it in time but it was a close call.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=305712&forum_id=2#4379890)





Date: November 25th, 2005 3:50 PM
Author: passionate peach principal's office lettuce

What does that mean, non-cancer brain tumor?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=305712&forum_id=2#4379897)





Date: November 25th, 2005 3:52 PM
Author: talented french alpha queen of the night

it wasnt cancerous, it was just a growth of tissue. It happens sometimes. Its less dangerous cause it doesnt metastisize (sp? -- spread) to other body parts.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=305712&forum_id=2#4379914)





Date: November 25th, 2005 3:53 PM
Author: passionate peach principal's office lettuce

So what does it mean to catch it in time?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=305712&forum_id=2#4379920)





Date: November 25th, 2005 3:55 PM
Author: Glassy cerebral range knife

Sometimes a tumor gets past the point where you can operate on it without severely damaging the brain. Or that's how it was expained to me, the science people probably can say it better.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=305712&forum_id=2#4379936)





Date: November 25th, 2005 3:55 PM
Author: Aromatic Den Mood

It would still be growing, just not capable of spreading to other parts of the body. So if it grew large enough and impaired brain function, it could still kill him or render him incapacitated.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=305712&forum_id=2#4379938)





Date: November 25th, 2005 3:55 PM
Author: talented french alpha queen of the night

it was small enough they could yank it out surgically without damaging the brain. when they get big enough you cant do anything

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=305712&forum_id=2#4379943)





Date: November 25th, 2005 4:01 PM
Author: passionate peach principal's office lettuce

oh ok I see. thanks guys

Now I have another tumor to worry about

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=305712&forum_id=2#4379986)





Date: November 25th, 2005 3:54 PM
Author: Aromatic Den Mood

"Benign", as in incapable of metastasis, brain tumors can still kill people. In fact, this is true of tumors of any vital organ.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=305712&forum_id=2#4379924)





Date: November 25th, 2005 3:51 PM
Author: Glassy cerebral range knife

Yikes. My cousin was having weird hallucinations and fainting a bit, and thought she was just stressed. Same diagnosis, probably not caught in time.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=305712&forum_id=2#4379901)





Date: November 25th, 2005 3:48 PM
Author: Aromatic Den Mood

It can happen. Depression destroys all sorts of cognitive abilities. Over the long term, it can actually cause neural atrophy.

I would guess that I'm at an IQ level 20-25 points below baseline. In my first year of graduate school, this is really not a good thing, especially since I'm surrounded by people as smart as I am (and therefore much smarter when I'm like this). I can't focus, my intellectual thought is limited, and my sense of time is totally out of whack.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=305712&forum_id=2#4379875)





Date: November 25th, 2005 3:50 PM
Author: Chestnut Trailer Park

It's okay time does not exist.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=305712&forum_id=2#4379898)





Date: November 25th, 2005 4:01 PM
Author: Aromatic Den Mood

I've heard an argument for that.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=305712&forum_id=2#4379988)





Date: November 25th, 2005 3:51 PM
Author: talented french alpha queen of the night

You really should take up my challenge not to use, nor think about, the term IQ for a month.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=305712&forum_id=2#4379905)





Date: November 25th, 2005 9:58 PM
Author: Vivacious crackhouse giraffe

agreed.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=305712&forum_id=2#4382513)





Date: November 25th, 2005 3:30 PM
Author: talented french alpha queen of the night

you might want to have that checked out

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=305712&forum_id=2#4379766)





Date: November 25th, 2005 3:38 PM
Author: Hairraiser sticky center

Have you found any dark hair clippings in your mittens? Or any syringes filled with your bodily fluids?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=305712&forum_id=2#4379813)





Date: November 25th, 2005 3:39 PM
Author: Aromatic Den Mood

Haha let me check.

All clear.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=305712&forum_id=2#4379822)





Date: November 25th, 2005 9:59 PM
Author: Vivacious crackhouse giraffe

it's amazing that he said joe was "that type" last night, when really (and i'm sure he's not, just saying) pensive has way more of the characteristics you might associate with the mentally deranged, obsessive math grad student.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=305712&forum_id=2#4382526)





Date: November 25th, 2005 10:05 PM
Author: Aromatic Den Mood

Well, certainly I have the math grad student bit. Other than that, your case falls flat.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=305712&forum_id=2#4382587)





Date: November 25th, 2005 11:42 PM
Author: Hairraiser sticky center

Recall that my argument was that you are closer to Lohman in behavior and temperament than Joe. I think most people would agree especially after your posts last night.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=305712&forum_id=2#4383463)





Date: November 25th, 2005 11:42 PM
Author: Aromatic Den Mood

Last night was fucking weird. I hope that doesn't happen again.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=305712&forum_id=2#4383468)





Date: November 26th, 2005 8:35 PM
Author: mind-boggling purple messiness internal respiration

Lohman probably says the same thing. Of course, he's gonna be in prison for awhile, most likely.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=305712&forum_id=2#4389251)





Date: November 27th, 2005 6:41 PM
Author: naked roommate feces

yes! excellent.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=305712&forum_id=2#4396813)





Date: November 25th, 2005 3:50 PM
Author: passionate peach principal's office lettuce

Yikes, that's scary. In all sincerity, I hope you get this checked out. If it were me I'd be in a hypochondriac fit right now.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=305712&forum_id=2#4379892)





Date: November 25th, 2005 3:53 PM
Author: Aromatic Den Mood

As I read over the shit, I can sort of remember typing it, and I'm clear on that I was up ridiculously late. I just would have no memory of what I wrote except by reading it the day after.

I also woke up distinctly remembering I had done something stupid the night before. XO was my first guess, and I was right.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=305712&forum_id=2#4379919)





Date: November 25th, 2005 4:00 PM
Author: passionate peach principal's office lettuce

As for stupid things the night before, it could've been a lot worse

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=305712&forum_id=2#4379983)





Date: November 25th, 2005 6:10 PM
Author: Odious seedy filthpig kitty cat

titcr.

i've woken up unable to walk.

twice.



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=305712&forum_id=2#4380691)





Date: November 25th, 2005 3:56 PM
Author: Crawly Kitchen Friendly Grandma

I literally forgot how old I was last night. 18 or 19? I had to count up from my birthday to be sure. I'm 19.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=305712&forum_id=2#4379944)





Date: November 25th, 2005 3:57 PM
Author: brass soul-stirring set incel

Whatever it is, I hope it leads to an early and painful death.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=305712&forum_id=2#4379952)





Date: November 25th, 2005 3:59 PM
Author: pale bbw therapy

I concur.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=305712&forum_id=2#4379967)





Date: November 25th, 2005 4:00 PM
Author: Aromatic Den Mood

It's probably nothing, other than mild-moderate depression, which is treatable.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=305712&forum_id=2#4379982)





Date: November 25th, 2005 4:01 PM
Author: pale bbw therapy

I hear it's most effectively treated by sucking on a loaded shotgun's barrel and pulling the trigger.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=305712&forum_id=2#4379990)





Date: November 25th, 2005 4:02 PM
Author: nubile electric laser beams

link to odd posts?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=305712&forum_id=2#4379995)





Date: November 25th, 2005 4:03 PM
Author: Glassy cerebral range knife

They weren't that odd, actually. A lot of the usual stuff, with some atypical comments about death.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=305712&forum_id=2#4380001)





Date: November 25th, 2005 4:07 PM
Author: Aromatic Den Mood

Hm. What's also alarming to me is the timestamps, the fact that I was in these stupid arguments for so long.

When I get into these XO flamewars, I'm usually in the worst mental state. When I'm in a decent mental state, I usually avoid XO because it's not good for me. I'm not saying that there's anything wrong with the board, but a very sick part of me is attracted to it because of all the bullshit status posturing, schticking, and incivility.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=305712&forum_id=2#4380018)





Date: November 25th, 2005 4:11 PM
Author: nubile electric laser beams

I tried three times to take that last sentence of yours and make it my byline, but there's no way I can cut it to fit, make sense, and give credit to you.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=305712&forum_id=2#4380041)





Date: November 25th, 2005 4:21 PM
Author: Aromatic Den Mood

Haha thanks.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=305712&forum_id=2#4380097)





Date: November 25th, 2005 10:01 PM
Author: Vivacious crackhouse giraffe

in some thread about rhodes scholars. it's just a lot of obsessive hating on joe, as usual.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=305712&forum_id=2#4382547)





Date: November 25th, 2005 4:13 PM
Author: sienna motley hell

drugs

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=305712&forum_id=2#4380046)





Date: November 25th, 2005 4:16 PM
Author: Aromatic Den Mood

None.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=305712&forum_id=2#4380064)





Date: November 25th, 2005 4:26 PM
Author: Mint Adulterous Son Of Senegal

aids?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=305712&forum_id=2#4380125)





Date: November 25th, 2005 5:38 PM
Author: amethyst awkward faggot firefighter base

i'd imagine that depression is a decent catalyst for art, but i'm not sure how well it comports with mathematical analysis. i'd go see a doc about it-- the winter can be be pretty depressing in the midwest.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=305712&forum_id=2#4380530)





Date: November 25th, 2005 5:48 PM
Author: Aromatic Den Mood

Re depression and art: That's a myth, though a widely-circulated one. It's true that a lot of great art comes out of suffering-- mourning, tragedy-- but pain and grief are common for normal people. Depression-- the disease, not the passing mood everyone gets-- actually reduces creativity, which improves once the disease is treated (unless reduced creativity is one of the SSRI mindfucks, which is another thing to worry about). Much of why this misconception exists is that depression tends to be comorbid with high intelligence and creativity; though in truth depression diminishes those traits. On the other hand, manic-depression (bipolar disorder) can enhance creativity in some people. In my experience and observation, the gains are minor. I've never been manic, but I've had hypomania and while it produces a lot of energy (and sleep loss) very little actual work gets done and so the creative gains are useless.

I'm getting checked out this Friday; I called in on Nov. 15 when I realized the problem wouldn't "fix itself", and that was the earliest they could schedule me. I hope I can hold out until then. I'm not suicidal, but it's tough to get work done with this condition.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=305712&forum_id=2#4380566)





Date: November 25th, 2005 6:09 PM
Author: amethyst awkward faggot firefighter base

"That's a myth, though a widely-circulated one."

I was thinking of bipolar disorder when I wrote the post above. But if a more general depression hinders rather than spurs creativity, that does surprise me, at least in terms of my own creative output (I would argue that the even for normal people, pain and grief tends to accentuate and heighten their capacity for creative output as well). Perhaps I am bipolar.

Interesting that you brought up the SSRI thing-- I was going to partly base the rationale of my argument off of a lack of seratonin vs. a normal level of seratonin. Of course, normal serotonin =/= excess serotonin, and it's too simplistic to reduce the capacity for creative output off of one brain chemical. I'd be curious to see why depression reduces creativity, however.

Good luck with the appointment and I hope that everything works out well. I do admit to being curious what it would be like, however, if you came back as a completely different poster/schtick.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=305712&forum_id=2#4380676)





Date: November 25th, 2005 6:19 PM
Author: Aromatic Den Mood

Since I've often used "pensive" as a euphemism for "depressed", I'd have to change the name. :)

I believe that pain and grief accentuate creativity, but those aren't the same thing as depression. Sad moods happen to everyone and are relatively healthy and normal.

Very few mental illnesses introduce new emotions; what most of them do is limit emotional range. The problem with depression seems to be as much about its prohibitive effect on the good emotions (energetic, happy, optimistic) as about the negative feelings it causes. I'm not sad, down, or upset right now-- pretty neutral, in fact-- but I haven't felt great (or even good) about life for a month, and that's a problem, because if I can't feel that unfettered goodness, my reward system gets all fucked up, my motivations flag and I start behaving in ways I shouldn't.

Depression kills creativity because it erodes confidence, and also leads to indecision, paralysis, and anxiety. Normal emotions of grief don't have these effects, but a long-term depressive disorder does.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=305712&forum_id=2#4380725)





Date: November 25th, 2005 6:22 PM
Author: 180 carmine home

you sound much smarter when you're not doing your "shtick". i hope you realize this.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=305712&forum_id=2#4380731)





Date: November 25th, 2005 6:28 PM
Author: Odious seedy filthpig kitty cat

i second this

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=305712&forum_id=2#4380756)





Date: November 25th, 2005 7:01 PM
Author: Aromatic Den Mood

My schtick is similar to what Media Kid was before he got sick of being thought stupid: whiny, well-off stupid kid saying shit to incite people. I agree that the schtick has long outlived its utility. Maybe schtick in general is just not good for me anymore. 174 and Media Kid seem robust enough that they can run offensive, belligerent (but highly amusing and beautifully executed) schticks on the board without compromise to their mental health, but I am not.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=305712&forum_id=2#4380976)





Date: November 25th, 2005 10:03 PM
Author: Vivacious crackhouse giraffe

the only thing is, there are certain subjects (women/dating and joe caltech are the two that come to mind) where you're definitely NOT schticking and just as ridiculous. THOSE are where the problems lie and those are where you need to get some therapy to work out your issues.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=305712&forum_id=2#4382570)





Date: November 25th, 2005 10:04 PM
Author: Fishy garrison

I agree. Some of the ridiculous self promotion (Ambition) strikes me as real too.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=305712&forum_id=2#4382577)





Date: November 25th, 2005 10:08 PM
Author: Aromatic Den Mood

The Joe Caltech hate is a schtick. I honestly don't care about him. Women/dating... eh, I wish it were going better, I really do. If I can get the depression cured, it shouldn't be so bad. I seem to do fine when I'm in a normal mood.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=305712&forum_id=2#4382608)





Date: November 25th, 2005 10:08 PM
Author: Fishy garrison

"The Joe Caltech hate is a schtick."

The fuck it is.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=305712&forum_id=2#4382616)





Date: November 25th, 2005 10:10 PM
Author: yapping psychic

titcr

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=305712&forum_id=2#4382635)





Date: November 25th, 2005 10:10 PM
Author: Aromatic Den Mood

Why would I have any reason to care about his board prestige anywhere but on the board?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=305712&forum_id=2#4382642)





Date: November 25th, 2005 10:12 PM
Author: Fishy garrison

His "board prestige" is due to real life accomplishments that you can't hold a candle to.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=305712&forum_id=2#4382660)





Date: November 25th, 2005 10:51 PM
Author: Aromatic Den Mood

Aside from the Rhodes, which has a prestigious history, you're wrong. Anyway, once I get my head fixed I'll devour both you and him alive... that is, if I still care to be posting on XO.

Also, his board prestige is actually because of the number of people who suck his cock, and nothing else.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=305712&forum_id=2#4382995)





Date: November 25th, 2005 10:58 PM
Author: Fishy garrison

His done numerous things outside of Rhodes - he won some presidential scholarship in HS, his company has won some award, he cowrote UYS, I read somewhere he was picked for some honor at Caltech - and that's just the shit I know about off the top of my head and I pay very little attention to Joe.

You made up a card game no one gives a shit about.

You lose and no amount of whining about depression will change this.



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=305712&forum_id=2#4383044)





Date: November 25th, 2005 11:14 PM
Author: Aromatic Den Mood

UYA has a negative net effect on his prestige, and a huge one. The same holds for PrepMe. His degrees are quite impressive; that I'll concede. He has extremely prestigious degrees.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=305712&forum_id=2#4383162)





Date: November 25th, 2005 11:22 PM
Author: Fishy garrison

And this is why people think you're jealous.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=305712&forum_id=2#4383248)





Date: November 25th, 2005 11:24 PM
Author: Aromatic Den Mood

Of his degrees? Making a comparison between engineering and math programs is essentially apples-to-oranges.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=305712&forum_id=2#4383263)





Date: November 25th, 2005 11:25 PM
Author: Fishy garrison

Of his accomplishments, fucker.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=305712&forum_id=2#4383288)





Date: November 25th, 2005 11:28 PM
Author: Aromatic Den Mood

Writing an SAT test-prep book is not an accomplishment. Nor is PoopMe.

His 3.8 at Caltech and high GPA at the Mich masters program, those are accomplishments.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=305712&forum_id=2#4383318)





Date: November 25th, 2005 11:29 PM
Author: Fishy garrison

Yes, coming up with names like "PoopMe" in no way indicates petty jealousy.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=305712&forum_id=2#4383337)





Date: November 25th, 2005 11:32 PM
Author: Aromatic Den Mood

It actually indicates contempt.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=305712&forum_id=2#4383363)





Date: November 25th, 2005 11:33 PM
Author: Fishy garrison

And envy.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=305712&forum_id=2#4383376)





Date: November 25th, 2005 11:37 PM
Author: Aromatic Den Mood

Wrong. Go cut yourself.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=305712&forum_id=2#4383419)





Date: November 25th, 2005 11:44 PM
Author: Fishy garrison

Says the guy whining the entire thread about his depression. What a fucking chode.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=305712&forum_id=2#4383477)





Date: November 26th, 2005 12:37 AM
Author: Aromatic Den Mood

I wasn't "whining", you filthy cunt. Go slit your wrists.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=305712&forum_id=2#4383899)





Date: November 26th, 2005 8:38 PM
Author: mind-boggling purple messiness internal respiration

TITCR

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=305712&forum_id=2#4389280)





Date: November 25th, 2005 11:02 PM
Author: bateful foreskin

Let's take a look at Joe's accomplishments:

-- Caltech undergrad w/ 3.8+ GPA

-- Michigan master's degree

-- self-made millionaire, owning a business that's won multiple entrepreneurial competitions, been featured in Fortune, CNN, and other media outlets

-- published author of a book that had multiple printings

Oh yeah, and THE FUCKING RHODES SCHOLARSHIP.

I don't see how you can say with a straight face that this guy isn't successful.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=305712&forum_id=2#4383072)





Date: November 25th, 2005 11:15 PM
Author: Aromatic Den Mood

The book and PrepMe are TTT loser-fucker disasters, and I highly doubt that he's a millionare from that shit.

Yeah, I've already conceded that his degrees are quite impressive.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=305712&forum_id=2#4383170)





Date: November 27th, 2005 6:47 PM
Author: naked roommate feces

oh.classic.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=305712&forum_id=2#4396858)





Date: November 25th, 2005 10:49 PM
Author: galvanic hyperactive theatre mad cow disease

just ignore it and hope it goes away

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=305712&forum_id=2#4382977)





Date: November 25th, 2005 10:01 PM
Author: Fishy garrison

Oh shut up, pensive. Talk about some hypochondria. It's called forgetting.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=305712&forum_id=2#4382553)





Date: November 25th, 2005 10:04 PM
Author: Self-centered casino

He's trying to move in on your most-fucked-up-poster territory.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=305712&forum_id=2#4382578)





Date: November 25th, 2005 10:05 PM
Author: Fishy garrison

Mine? You mean Madame Cunt's. I am painfully normal.



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=305712&forum_id=2#4382582)





Date: November 25th, 2005 10:07 PM
Author: Self-centered casino

...aside from the cutting.

But you do have a point.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=305712&forum_id=2#4382599)





Date: November 25th, 2005 10:08 PM
Author: Fishy garrison

I think cutting is pretty normal - or at least self destruction as a form of release is.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=305712&forum_id=2#4382607)





Date: November 25th, 2005 10:50 PM
Author: Aromatic Den Mood

PWN3D. That was an edgy retort.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=305712&forum_id=2#4382987)





Date: November 25th, 2005 10:58 PM
Author: Fishy garrison

Seriously, get yourself locked up in a psychiatric ward for a couple of days.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=305712&forum_id=2#4383046)





Date: November 25th, 2005 11:21 PM
Author: Aromatic Den Mood

Sharp! You have very cutting wit. I knife... er, I mean like this exchange.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=305712&forum_id=2#4383231)





Date: November 25th, 2005 11:21 PM
Author: Fishy garrison

It wasn't meant to be witty. you just sound absolutely absurd whining about your mental health. See what real crazy people are like would do you some good.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=305712&forum_id=2#4383237)





Date: November 25th, 2005 11:23 PM
Author: Aromatic Den Mood

I wasn't whining. I started the thread because I woke up with practically no recollection of the previous 14 hours, and it scared the crap out of me to find that I had been flaming on XO, and had no idea what I had said.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=305712&forum_id=2#4383252)





Date: November 25th, 2005 11:25 PM
Author: Fishy garrison

You've been going on the entire thread about how you can no longer hide you have severe depression issues and whine whine whine and blah blah blah and so forth. It seems to me you just stayed up too late goofing off. But I'd probably tell you otherwise if it meant you paying to see me once a week as well as some kickbacks from a few drug companies.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=305712&forum_id=2#4383281)





Date: November 25th, 2005 11:27 PM
Author: Aromatic Den Mood

Nah, I've had a problem before that, off and on for 6 years. I was just good at hiding it.

I probably have to end the schtick now that the cat's out, which is annoying because schtick is fun.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=305712&forum_id=2#4383309)





Date: November 25th, 2005 11:30 PM
Author: Fishy garrison

"Good at hiding it". Give me a break. Again, check yourself into a psychiatric ward, see what a crazy person acts like, and quit your fucking whining.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=305712&forum_id=2#4383343)





Date: November 25th, 2005 11:32 PM
Author: Aromatic Den Mood

If you don't shut up, I will take this schtick away from XO forever, and you will miss the fucker so much you will beg me to bring it back.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=305712&forum_id=2#4383359)





Date: November 25th, 2005 11:33 PM
Author: Fishy garrison

You know, I was just about to go to bed, but in light of this post, I think I will spend all night on xoxo yapping it up if it means you will fucking leave forever, you ugly, jealous little bitch.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=305712&forum_id=2#4383370)





Date: November 25th, 2005 11:38 PM
Author: Aromatic Den Mood

My schtick is funnier, more prestigious, and all around better than yours. Yours is only half-decent by the standards of a furniture store.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=305712&forum_id=2#4383427)





Date: November 25th, 2005 11:39 PM
Author: Fishy garrison

I am not schtick.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=305712&forum_id=2#4383437)





Date: November 25th, 2005 11:39 PM
Author: Aromatic Den Mood

That's what they all say.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=305712&forum_id=2#4383442)





Date: November 25th, 2005 11:35 PM
Author: bateful foreskin

Didn't you "retire" last spring?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=305712&forum_id=2#4383394)





Date: November 25th, 2005 11:37 PM
Author: Aromatic Den Mood

Yeah, I left the college board because of all the unprestigious loser-fuckers, such as Joe Caltech. I thought the law board was better, so I came back, but I'm really itching to leave this fucker in the dust too, because it has the same caliber of loser-idiots.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=305712&forum_id=2#4383414)





Date: November 25th, 2005 11:32 PM
Author: galvanic hyperactive theatre mad cow disease

that's not very credible

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=305712&forum_id=2#4383367)





Date: November 27th, 2005 7:03 PM
Author: slate razzle multi-billionaire

Well, at least you can be sure it's not syphilis.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=305712&forum_id=2#4396998)





Date: November 27th, 2005 7:08 PM
Author: Magenta Boyish Station Degenerate

178

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=305712&forum_id=2#4397023)





Date: April 8th, 2007 7:08 PM
Author: ungodly bearded parlour



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=305712&forum_id=2#7896418)





Date: April 8th, 2007 9:51 PM
Author: Excitant shrine goal in life

It's funny how pensive was able to feign a mass nervous breakdown of five XO posters at one time.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=305712&forum_id=2#7897339)