Like idk if it’s actually how I’m feeling or if I’m just psyching myself out

I can’t crush this poor guy

Like he’s already talking about rings and kids and has our whole lives planned out

He hasn’t had the easiest life but has done amazing for himself and is successful and I can’t be the girl who he’s loved for years who crushes him

I also don’t know if I’ll regret backing out later on

This is bad

I’m seeing him tomorrow and I’m going to see how I feel

Haven’t even told my parents I’ve been planning to move or anything.

I am such a horrible person

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5290248&forum_id=2#45930467)

I have like 30min left to decide if I want to meet him at all and crush him in person or if I should just fly immediately back to Boston after getting to the other city

Either way it will be cruel

I just don’t know the most compassionate way to go about it

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5290248&forum_id=2#45933097)

1.) don’t meet him at all & fly back to Boston tonight

Or

2.) meet him at the hotel, get unpacked, awkwardly avoid him trying to hook up w me/fuck me, go out to dinner with weird vibes, then go back to the hotel and break it to him when I won’t have sex with him… but then we’ll be stuck together until the next morning

I would just go out to dinner and break it to him then or right after but I can’t do that because by the time we’re at dinner, all my stuff will already be at the hotel so I’d have to go back to get it with him

I need input/help

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5290248&forum_id=2#45933127)

I’m serious pls

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5290248&forum_id=2#45933185)

as if impermanence and lack of commitment stopped you before lol.

You are the very stereotype men have in mind when they say that women are incapable of moral convictions. You flit from man to man, fucking and sucking for attention and validation, with the rationalization that "it's different this time," forgetting the last five times the hamster on a wheel that makes your "decisions" -- inasmuch as raw impulse reactions to stimuli can be called that -- lost interest or got cold feet and bailed.

You try to maintain this charade for yourself and others of being an adherent, believing Catholic, while simultaneously repeatedly engaging in behavior that is repulsive to the God you claim to worship. In truth, your actions and pattern of behavior reveal that you don't believe any of it, regardless of whether you think you do, and you maintain the charade for attention or because you lack the self-awareness to take stock of what your actions indicate about what you truly believe. Not that it would matter much if you could do this, because any moral reformulation you could conceive of would be disingenuous unless it were simply, "I do what makes me feel good at any given time." Any further window dressing is just something you tell yourself to feel better about that truth.

This sort of thing will happen again, and when it does, I want you to think back to this. This is why.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5290248&forum_id=2#45933554)

This poor poor guy is going to be stood up on valemtine’s day and is going to be crushed

Holy shit I am awful

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5290248&forum_id=2#45933234)

they aren't that far apart, we just associate GJR with a younger age because she still farts stream of consciousness bonermemories all over the board.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5290248&forum_id=2#45933835)

Box is early 40s and GJR is 30, right?

Thought the gap was way more than 4 years

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5290248&forum_id=2#45933874)

GJR is 27-29

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5290248&forum_id=2#45933918)

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5290248&forum_id=2#45933962)

Sitting in the hotel lobby right now. We were supposed to get here at almost exactly the same time but his plane was delayed 50+ minutes

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5290248&forum_id=2#45933701)

I thought she was obsessed with “boner police.” Who is this new character? She should probably just kill him off, this thread was a serious error in judgment

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5290248&forum_id=2#45933815)

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5290248&forum_id=2#45933750)