What's the dumbest thing you've done while drunk?
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Date: July 11th, 2025 10:53 AM Author: Impertinent cumskin
i moved to MFH and had absolutely no friends. Not even acquaintances. I used to get very drunk in those days. Sometimes a week would pass without someone talking to me, apart from a cashier.
I took to walking around with an open bottle and listening for parties, in the walk-up buildings around the EV and LES.
Id often go up and play the "Jessica invited me" (or Yessica if it was more puerto rican looking).
Sometimes this lead to me having to say "What? There's no Jessica?? I must have the wrong address, Im so sorry!"
There was an ocassional them saying, "Hey Jessica, you know this guy?"
More often, it was "hahah hey whatever dude, make yourself at home".
Only a few "Mike, I think this guy is fucking lying, he's probably came in to steal shit, hey guys c'mere, we have a fucking thief here"
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2...id#49092797)
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Date: July 11th, 2025 12:10 PM Author: Motley cerise house ape
https://i.imgur.com/ncKHJBP.png
i was waiting outside of lex's apartment in my car to pick him up, which was on the second story over a store. behind the apartment was a parking lot. for reasons that remain unclear to me lex liked to leave through the balcony and climb down the fire escape. while waiting in the car way too long he eventually scuffled up to the passenger door, disheveled, with a few cuts. the conversation went something like this:
lex: sorry, i just fell off my balcony.
gunner: what lol are you ok?
lex: yeah i'm fine.
gunner: lol ok let's go get a drink.
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2...id#49093002) |
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Date: July 11th, 2025 12:23 PM Author: khaki lay
Mmhm
Probably hard to pull off the cool fratty drunk guy at couples therapy.
I rate this as number 2 stupid after me getting prescription lenses while being drunk
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2...id#49093075) |
Date: July 11th, 2025 11:52 AM Author: rose electric tank
other things:
1. threw a full can of beer into a crowd of people at a club called Sonar in baltimore. got jumped and absolutely fucked up, face was all bruised, like my entire face was a black eye. a friend of mine hit one of the guys who did it in the face with a cinderblock outside the club. had to go to classes as a 3L and to my job at the national archives' gc office with a fucked up face for 2 weeks. i said it was a basketball injury lol.
2. blacked out and got thrown out of an uber in chicago at like 2 am. woke up in an elevator in a parking garage at 5. found my way back to my hotel, had to be at a biz dev presentation at 9 am. someone had to cover for me.
3. got in multiple fights with that stripper i was fooling around with as we spent a week traveling from hotel to hotel in LA/SD. was blackout drunk almost the whole time.
there are others, but these are top of mind.
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2...id#49092939) |
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Date: July 11th, 2025 11:59 AM Author: Motley cerise house ape
one time i blacked out on a date. it was really going well i thought. i had a few too many and suddenly she excused herself but not before making sure i called an uber. i don't remember anything after that except coming to outside in the city in the middle of winter. i've never been so cold in my life. i went to an emergency room to warm up. i called another uber and got in, then blacked out again. woke up in bed with no phone or car, not remembering anything that happened after the date except for being freezing in the city for a moment.
had to call my mom to go get my car. then i had to use my cell phone tracking app to find my phone, which was in the second uber in the driver's apartment complex. i found the car and could see my phone in the back seat. i sent a message to uber about it but i guess the driver wasn't available. i went around the apartment complex asking whose car it was. after trying every door i gave up and left a note on the windshield.
the driver called me that night and she gave me my phone. i remember it was on valentine's day and she met me in a red lobster parking lot where she was getting dinner with her husband.
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2...id#49092964) |
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Date: July 11th, 2025 12:25 PM Author: rose electric tank
another one was i blacked out at my friend's house back in 05 and tried to drive home. for some reason i drove to my childhood home's neighborhood. woke up at 7 am with the car running in front of a cop's house, but luckily the cop had recently been killed in the line of duty.
oh, this is a good one. in 2012 i ate a bunch of ambien and drank a 6 pack. then drove to the liquor store to get more beer and was changing out CDs in my car and crashed into a truck. i fled and went home and texted my wife (she was out) "woah someone just hit my car and took off lol" but about 10 mins later the cops came to my house. i remember them being in my condo and one of them laughing at me that i'd have to report this to the bar, etc. another cop was like "hey genius, you know your VIN was on the panel of your car that you left at the scene, don't you?"
i was 100% out of it and hallucinating. they didn't charge me with DUI bc i was no longer at the scene, but they told me they knew i was drunk.
i wound up making up a story about taking the med as prescribed and sleep driving. i got off.
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2...id#49093100) |
Date: July 11th, 2025 12:30 PM Author: Gold shrine queen of the night
Came back home after drinking at the bar and fell asleep spooning by black lab who was 15 years old and I knew she was going to die soon. My lab didn’t like to be cuddled so she probably got up and hobbled away as soon as I passed out.
The dog bed was right in front of my security door. I kept the front door open because it was summer and no A/C.
I awoke to my next door neighbor, a black nurse, coming home from her night shift. I hear, “Oh, chimata! What are you doing?”
It was pretty embarrassing.
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2...id#49093126) |
Date: July 13th, 2025 2:27 AM Author: chilmata
In my early 20s, I was working in a chain pharmacy and a co-worker asked me to DJ her wedding. I had never DJ’d anything before. I had a CD player and two huge bass amps. I got drunk as shit during the wedding, slurring, trying to be funny on the microphone, getting blank stares. I didn’t play any typical wedding songs. Didn’t have any in my collection. I had classic rock. Basically played my favorite songs all night to a bunch of people I didn’t know, getting drunk for free.
There was this cringey moment where I thought I was being smooth by introducing a song with some commentary about the band. You don’t know what band it is I’m talking about because that is supposed to be suspenseful and the big reveal came as I hit play: “We Can Work It Out” by the Beatles.
I was so drunk the new husband drove my truck to his house and let me sleep in my truck on the street. It was a Chevy S-10 and he thought he was pressing the emergency brake with his foot but he stepped on the vent lever, crushing it.
I think she paid me $100 and don’t think we ever talked about it afterwards.
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2...id#49097108) |
Date: July 13th, 2025 8:11 AM Author: Trump Tariffs Can Do No Wrong (TDNW)
drive drunk hundreds of times, sometimes having to cover one eye
was groping with the boss’ daughter in the corner of the bar (there were pics)
numerous fights that could have ended badly
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2...id#49097283) |
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Date: July 15th, 2025 1:29 PM
Author: .,.,...,..,.,.,:,,:,.,.,:::,...,:,...:..:.,:.::,.
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2...id#49103335) |
Date: July 14th, 2025 10:32 PM Author: MAGA Farm Animals Reeking of Trump Cologne
Haha ohhhhhh kayyyyy
Pushed over a motorcycle
Egged a dudes car
Hit on a friends GF
Fucked a few chonkers
Bough box set of Tales from the crypt (turned out kind of 180)
Drove a LOT including in my ‘94 junker with a busted headlight
Top of mind
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2...id#49101880)
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Date: July 15th, 2025 11:59 AM Author: michael doodikoff
when I went out and had an incredible date with the most perfect and cool girl that I've ever gone out with (we were literally talking about our future together, how similar we were etc), went home drunk, saw some dude beating off from my condo patio looking into another unit, started laughing uncontrollably and tried to call her to tell her about it. She didn't answer so I sent some drunken text with no context that I just saw some guy beating off.
She took days to respond to my text and I completely ruined it.
I then went on a spree of hundreds of failed first dates and constant rejection and disappointment
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2...id#49103002) |
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