BAM! You get $25M, but you have to LIVE in a Buc-ee's for 5 years.
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Poast new message in this thread
Date: July 9th, 2025 3:34 AM Author: massive plaza
BAM! You get $25M, but you have to LIVE in a Buc-ee's for 5 years.
GUN TO HEAD: You are given $25,000,000 tax-free.
The catch: you must live inside a single Buc-ee's location for five years straight. You can never leave the property line. You have unlimited access to all food, drink, and merchandise. You are given a small cot in a storage closet. You may use the bathrooms like any other customer.
You may have a laptop with internet, but all your poasts will be geo-tagged to the Buc-ee's.
Do you accept the terms of your gilded cage?
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5747999&forum_id=2...id.#49085226) |
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Date: July 9th, 2025 3:35 AM Author: massive plaza Subject: (The Beaver™ Logs All)
I accept.
Not because I crave the money, but because the Mahchine™ already placed me here.
The Buc-ee’s is a simulation node. A psychological study wrapped in fudge and fleece.
I will poast. I will sleep beside 480 plush beavers. I will bathe in LED glare and brisket grease.
Let them geo-tag me. Let them watch me unravel in aisle 14 beside the sour ropes.
Because one day, when the Club Card scanners begin to speak...
I will be ready.
This is not confinement.
This is $ervice.
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5747999&forum_id=2...id.#49085227) |
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Date: July 9th, 2025 3:36 AM Author: massive plaza Subject: Evan "Juris Doctor" Vance (How Dare You™)
Absolutely not.
Five years in a neon-soaked consumer purgatory, surrounded by Midwestern families wearing flip-flops in winter, and urinals that smell like nutmeg beef jerky?
I would rather earn $25M practicing law in a boutique firm with tasteful exposed brick and Scandinavian chairs.
I light Diptyque candles when I feel trapped. What would I do in a Buc-ee’s? Light a citronella bucket?
No.
I will die with dignity, not wrapped in a Beaver™ fleece.
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5747999&forum_id=2...id.#49085228) |
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Date: July 9th, 2025 3:36 AM Author: massive plaza Subject: Boom (Screaming from inside the Buc-ee’s freezer)
THEY THINK I’M TRAPPED?
I BEEN HERE SIX YEARS.
I OWN THE COT.
I MAED THE BRISKET MY CHILDD.
THE ADM™ DRONE$ FLEDY LOW HEREE.
THE BEAVER’S™ EYE$w MOVE AT NIGHT.
I BUILT A RADIO OUT OF PEPPERONI STICKS AND A TOY RIFLE.
IT ONLY BROADCASTS ONE PHRASE:
“THE FUDGE IS FAKE.”
$25 M?
BROTHESR, THAT’S JUST THE ENTRY FEE TO THE NEXT LAYER.
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5747999&forum_id=2...id.#49085229) |
Date: July 9th, 2025 8:34 AM Author: Laughsome Dull Principal's Office
This would be well worth it and not that hard for $25M. You can chill, post, read, go on a walk around the 80 gas pumps.
It would be a tougher call at $4M.
The only downside is either my kids would need to relocate or I wouldn't see them much for the 5 years.
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5747999&forum_id=2...id.#49085452) |
Date: July 9th, 2025 11:08 PM Author: up-to-no-good locus
Park high end RV in the parking lot.
Set up exercise routine. Maybe get a second RV outfitted as a gym, set up running or walking course around the property.
Get deliveries of real groceries from nearest town.
Work from home and or make YouTube videos about the experience.
Invite family and friends to come visit.
Make $25 million.
The whole thing sounds like a no brainer.
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5747999&forum_id=2...id.#49088667) |
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Date: July 12th, 2025 1:55 PM Author: Deranged peach spot
1. lookup locations as a whole
2. narrow down possible choices by proximity to family/friends
3. narrow down possible choices by proximity to strip clubs
4. look at census data and local high school sports results
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5747999&forum_id=2...id.#49095905) |
Date: July 13th, 2025 9:15 AM Author: plum deer antler striped hyena
Looks better than prison food, so yes.
https://youtu.be/gN8sk-4ZRdQ?t=173
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5747999&forum_id=2...id.#49097340) |
Date: July 19th, 2025 9:39 AM
Author: ..,,.,.,,,.,,,,.,.,.,,,..,,.,,..,,
But where do I get 25m
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5747999&forum_id=2...id.#49114065) |
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