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What's the dumbest thing you've done while drunk?

I think i get a 180 for this, or wasnt driving or texting a...
fragrant piazza
  07/11/25
trying to navigate the real world while drunk can actually b...
Twinkling Beady-eyed Plaza Dysfunction
  07/11/25
It was really funny because he was getting really pissed off...
fragrant piazza
  07/11/25
180 ^ 180
Twinkling Beady-eyed Plaza Dysfunction
  07/11/25
...
Learning disabled nubile brunch
  07/11/25
The first and only time I drove drunk I was 19 and at a hous...
Arrogant hideous place of business institution
  07/11/25
I was also 19 but I got home and fell asleep in the back yar...
haunting excitant step-uncle's house
  07/11/25
Got in a fight with my wife and drove to my office intending...
swollen brindle locale selfie
  07/11/25
Lol this is cr. When you're about to move out and by the tim...
fragrant piazza
  07/11/25
...
Twinkling Beady-eyed Plaza Dysfunction
  07/11/25
I once went for drinks after work in the office and came bac...
soul-stirring startled heaven generalized bond
  07/15/25
Hit on various women who rejected me.
pale deer antler electric furnace
  07/11/25
...
Ebony razzle-dazzle chapel
  07/12/25
My worst was a hotel front desk clerk.
Ebony razzle-dazzle chapel
  07/12/25
did you drunkenly assume he likes fat guys?
jade beta puppy
  07/13/25
I have done this so many times it's hard to find a worst, bu...
pale deer antler electric furnace
  07/14/25
Ive done a lot of fairly stupid shit while drunk, but one th...
Twinkling Beady-eyed Plaza Dysfunction
  07/11/25
I also once climbed out my bedroom window to avoid inviting ...
Twinkling Beady-eyed Plaza Dysfunction
  07/11/25
let a random guy on the street make a phone call with my cel...
aquamarine flatulent jew market
  07/11/25
lol
Sadistic persian brethren
  07/11/25
how did the random guy turn the stove on
fragrant piazza
  07/11/25
lol separate events! but i do appreciate the innuendo
aquamarine flatulent jew market
  07/11/25
go to law school.
Frisky Slimy House
  07/11/25
...
Twinkling Beady-eyed Plaza Dysfunction
  07/11/25
...
Bull headed racy candlestick maker locus
  07/11/25
blacked out while driving, twice. made it home fine but holy...
At-the-ready swashbuckling bawdyhouse stock car
  07/11/25
Incredible poast/moniker synergy
Twinkling Beady-eyed Plaza Dysfunction
  07/11/25
...
Copper offensive idiot preventive strike
  07/11/25
...
Bull headed racy candlestick maker locus
  07/11/25
Hooked up with guy, puked in his bathroom, used towel to cle...
Twinkling Beady-eyed Plaza Dysfunction
  07/11/25
I love how the focal point of this short vignette is that it...
frozen liquid oxygen den
  07/15/25
A law professor waved at me while passing me in the hallway ...
Cheese-eating federal theater stage keepsake machete
  07/11/25
...
Twinkling Beady-eyed Plaza Dysfunction
  07/11/25
...
Vibrant house-broken personal credit line location
  07/11/25
Soo cr
fragrant piazza
  07/11/25
...
vivacious party of the first part
  07/11/25
Pumpkin beers.
swollen brindle locale selfie
  07/11/25
...
Learning disabled nubile brunch
  07/11/25
...
Copper offensive idiot preventive strike
  07/11/25
...
haunting excitant step-uncle's house
  07/11/25
...
Bull headed racy candlestick maker locus
  07/11/25
...
Bossy Crackhouse
  07/11/25
lmfao
shimmering parlour
  07/13/25
why were you drunk at school?
smoky newt
  07/13/25
??
fragrant piazza
  07/15/25
...
Ebony razzle-dazzle chapel
  07/14/25
...
Arrogant hideous place of business institution
  07/14/25
...
nighttime big goal in life address
  07/14/25
...
dashing gas station
  07/14/25
Snuck out of my parents' house and walked with some friends ...
Marvelous Flirting Abode Mother
  07/11/25
Given that you now white knight for angel reese, id say your...
Twinkling Beady-eyed Plaza Dysfunction
  07/11/25
i can't imagine hating on angel reese. if you watched her at...
Marvelous Flirting Abode Mother
  07/11/25
She's so cool and I love her eyelashes so you know she's a f...
fragrant piazza
  07/11/25
you're a cool female!
Marvelous Flirting Abode Mother
  07/11/25
i moved to MFH and had absolutely no friends. Not even acqua...
violet indian lodge
  07/11/25
180
embarrassed to the bone trip knife factory reset button
  07/11/25
180 need more stories from this period of life brother
Brilliant trailer park
  07/12/25
...
smoky newt
  07/13/25
...
Mind-boggling pearly kitchen main people
  07/13/25
Registered for xo
stubborn awkward kitty cat stage
  07/11/25
falling off a balcony while hanging with gunner
glittery principal's office national security agency
  07/11/25
Wasnt it a roof?
Twinkling Beady-eyed Plaza Dysfunction
  07/11/25
to be pedantic, it was a balcony hanging over another roof
glittery principal's office national security agency
  07/11/25
It is important to be as accurate as possible when regaling ...
Twinkling Beady-eyed Plaza Dysfunction
  07/11/25
Draw this
fragrant piazza
  07/11/25
https://i.imgur.com/ncKHJBP.png i was waiting outside of ...
Learning disabled nubile brunch
  07/11/25
this image is of a man falling backwards into a chickenwire ...
fragrant piazza
  07/11/25
https://ibb.co/607Mnjzv
glittery principal's office national security agency
  07/11/25
hfs 180^180^1800000!!!!!!
Learning disabled nubile brunch
  07/11/25
180. Gunner is pretty handsome for an Indian
fragrant piazza
  07/11/25
i'm a lucky man, no homo
glittery principal's office national security agency
  07/11/25
Rank the top 5 stories itt
fragrant piazza
  07/11/25
scholarship's story is #1 by far, who cares about the rest
Vibrant house-broken personal credit line location
  07/11/25
muscadine wine slicing his arms open like a tin can to demon...
fragrant piazza
  07/12/25
...
glittery principal's office national security agency
  07/12/25
...
Mind-boggling pearly kitchen main people
  07/13/25
Do t you already have concussion/Brain issues
sienna boyish cuckoldry
  07/13/25
caused/exacerbated by shit like this, which was years ago an...
Learning disabled nubile brunch
  07/15/25
I really like it here.
thriller boltzmann resort
  07/13/25
because of my Scumbag upbringing this didn't register to me ...
Learning disabled nubile brunch
  07/11/25
...
glittery principal's office national security agency
  07/11/25
...
Twinkling Beady-eyed Plaza Dysfunction
  07/11/25
...
smoky newt
  07/13/25
...
Comical maroon private investor
  07/14/25
Is that what put you in the hospital/off xo for a long time?...
amber office
  07/11/25
ah, sorry to hear that, man. i was already having seizures ...
glittery principal's office national security agency
  07/11/25
DV and i got locked up for 3 days
vivacious party of the first part
  07/11/25
Reconciled and hooked up with an ex who later tried to kill ...
Maize Aromatic Field Tattoo
  07/11/25
went to couples therapy. we, uh, had to end the session earl...
Learning disabled nubile brunch
  07/11/25
much many more details to do the needful
fragrant piazza
  07/11/25
we were having a fight before we were heading off to therapy...
Learning disabled nubile brunch
  07/11/25
Mmhm Probably hard to pull off the cool fratty drunk guy at...
fragrant piazza
  07/11/25
i'm very gregarious and convincing. doesn't really work with...
Learning disabled nubile brunch
  07/11/25
Yes it's literally why your wife brought you there
fragrant piazza
  07/11/25
you fags are oracles when it comes to male/female dynamics a...
Learning disabled nubile brunch
  07/11/25
Doing couples therapy with someone you aren’t at least...
amber office
  07/11/25
this was with my exwife!
Learning disabled nubile brunch
  07/11/25
I didnt know you were a divorcee
amber office
  07/11/25
still am too
Learning disabled nubile brunch
  07/11/25
Many layers to this fag’s loserdom
cerebral half-breed mood
  07/11/25
here's another crazy story about my ex-wife: she never cucke...
Learning disabled nubile brunch
  07/11/25
“I’m a huge simp” great poast, champ
cerebral half-breed mood
  07/11/25
how are you even real? can't wait to see how this crash out ...
Learning disabled nubile brunch
  07/11/25
You’re too in your 40s to talk like that
cerebral half-breed mood
  07/11/25
and you're a bit too old for "mom please dont take my c...
Learning disabled nubile brunch
  07/11/25
other things: 1. threw a full can of beer into a crowd of...
vivacious party of the first part
  07/11/25
i feel like you would win this thread, not that it's a compe...
aquamarine flatulent jew market
  07/11/25
i am sure i have other wild shit. for overall zany things yo...
vivacious party of the first part
  07/11/25
...
aquamarine flatulent jew market
  07/11/25
one time i blacked out on a date. it was really going well i...
Learning disabled nubile brunch
  07/11/25
180. Louis cannon type story
vivacious party of the first part
  07/11/25
Lmao
smoky newt
  07/13/25
your stories are 180 when you consider that you have been ou...
fragrant piazza
  07/11/25
wild stuff, man.
vivacious party of the first part
  07/11/25
another one was i blacked out at my friend's house back in 0...
vivacious party of the first part
  07/11/25
oh shit, i forgot this one. in december 2017, i was about to...
vivacious party of the first part
  07/11/25
we should party sometime
Ebony razzle-dazzle chapel
  07/12/25
i'm sober now but i'll RAGE with you anyway.
vivacious party of the first part
  07/13/25
accidentally used the diesel can instead of the kerosene can...
pearl tank
  07/11/25
Came back home after drinking at the bar and fell asleep spo...
idiotic sexy native
  07/11/25
wait, you're telling me you have a black wife AND you had a ...
vivacious party of the first part
  07/11/25
Yeah but now I have a yellow lab to even things out.
idiotic sexy native
  07/11/25
You have a black wife and yellow lab? You got those two mixe...
Twinkling Beady-eyed Plaza Dysfunction
  07/11/25
OFS
idiotic sexy native
  07/11/25
...
Crawly Codepig Sandwich
  07/11/25
now you need a yellow mistress
At-the-ready swashbuckling bawdyhouse stock car
  07/11/25
I was a knife salesman for Cutco knives and showed up to a s...
Bonkers legal warrant
  07/11/25
180000000000
fragrant piazza
  07/11/25
...
Twinkling Beady-eyed Plaza Dysfunction
  07/11/25
lol
idiotic sexy native
  07/11/25
...
Cheese-eating federal theater stage keepsake machete
  07/11/25
...
Learning disabled nubile brunch
  07/11/25
lmao
Bull headed racy candlestick maker locus
  07/11/25
...
lascivious karate feces
  07/11/25
"Go and do likewise, gents."
Claret Cuckold Pisswyrm
  07/11/25
...
Learning disabled nubile brunch
  07/11/25
...
haunting excitant step-uncle's house
  07/11/25
...
Bull headed racy candlestick maker locus
  07/11/25
...
Cream psychic
  07/11/25
...
smoky newt
  07/13/25
...
Slate Massive Depressive
  07/14/25
...
vivacious party of the first part
  07/11/25
...
haunting excitant step-uncle's house
  07/11/25
this would make a great scene in a movie
Insecure charismatic indirect expression sound barrier
  07/13/25
...
shimmering parlour
  07/13/25
...
Mind-boggling pearly kitchen main people
  07/13/25
...
Comical maroon private investor
  07/14/25
180
Ebony razzle-dazzle chapel
  07/14/25
...
dark regret
  07/14/25
This thread delivered. My story involves getting extremely ...
Bull headed racy candlestick maker locus
  07/11/25
One time I passed out in a Subway parking lot. The cops foun...
swollen brindle locale selfie
  07/11/25
fucked up my favorite jeans and a pair of shoes i really lik...
milky bearded school
  07/11/25
I severely fucked up my Speedmaster drunkenly falling up con...
mustard rough-skinned lodge roommate
  07/13/25
sex with men for money
maniacal stage
  07/11/25
How much did you pay
fragrant piazza
  07/11/25
cant remember, was drunk
maniacal stage
  07/11/25
...
Impressive laser beams center
  07/11/25
...
lascivious karate feces
  07/11/25
Hit on my SIL
green theater voyeur
  07/11/25
can you provide details
pearl tank
  07/11/25
I outran the cops going about 115 mph one night, although I ...
Garnet Diverse Hunting Ground
  07/11/25
180, did that scare you sober for a while?
vivacious party of the first part
  07/11/25
not that I recall
Garnet Diverse Hunting Ground
  07/11/25
180
Learning disabled nubile brunch
  07/12/25
...
vivacious party of the first part
  07/12/25
...
Sadistic persian brethren
  07/14/25
I got into a fight with a Canadian goose. I lost; badly.
Talented mauve meetinghouse mexican
  07/12/25
vicious animals
aquamarine flatulent jew market
  07/12/25
I lost part of my scalp.
Talented mauve meetinghouse mexican
  07/12/25
nasty motherfuckers
Ebony razzle-dazzle chapel
  07/14/25
Apply and then get accepted to law school
crusty stag film toaster
  07/12/25
Lol
Talented mauve meetinghouse mexican
  07/12/25
Major crimes unit
Vigorous nursing home
  07/12/25
...
Razzle big-titted faggotry ape
  07/14/25
I was at a sushi bar alone and started doing sake shots with...
Pink adulterous halford
  07/13/25
In my early 20s, I was working in a chain pharmacy and a co-...
idiotic sexy native
  07/13/25
...
Onyx heady stead useless brakes
  07/13/25
...
Learning disabled nubile brunch
  07/14/25
...
lascivious karate feces
  07/14/25
felt something
Razzle big-titted faggotry ape
  07/13/25
OP is a broke ass gay faggot with literal AIDSs in his 60s.
Naked Mentally Impaired Lay
  07/13/25
drive drunk hundreds of times, sometimes having to cover one...
smoky newt
  07/13/25
Fell for Mossad honeypot operation and fucked a teen on hidd...
Arrogant hideous place of business institution
  07/13/25
...
cerebral half-breed mood
  07/14/25
...
Bull headed racy candlestick maker locus
  07/15/25
went to see hotel for dogs in the movie theater
vivacious party of the first part
  07/14/25
Legal work
Spectacular rose gaping prole
  07/14/25
Have never done anything dumb
cerebral half-breed mood
  07/14/25
Was bowling and my friend was poking me so I “accident...
Comical maroon private investor
  07/14/25
...
Sadistic persian brethren
  07/14/25
Hilarious for everyone involved!
idiotic sexy native
  07/14/25
Not committed suicide
Fluffy base
  07/14/25
Haha ohhhhhh kayyyyy Pushed over a motorcycle Egged a...
180 spot sneaky criminal
  07/14/25
when I went out and had an incredible date with the most per...
nighttime big goal in life address
  07/15/25
...
Vibrant house-broken personal credit line location
  07/15/25
literally talking about our future together, how similar we ...
fragrant piazza
  07/15/25
...
Learning disabled nubile brunch
  07/15/25
Went to a gun range.
soul-stirring startled heaven generalized bond
  07/15/25


Poast new message in this thread



Reply Favorite

Date: July 11th, 2025 9:52 AM
Author: fragrant piazza

I think i get a 180 for this, or wasnt driving or texting an ex or whatever. I went to the optometrist

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2...id.#49092663)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 11th, 2025 9:53 AM
Author: Twinkling Beady-eyed Plaza Dysfunction

trying to navigate the real world while drunk can actually be really fun. lol @ going to the optometrist though.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2...id.#49092664)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 11th, 2025 10:01 AM
Author: fragrant piazza

It was really funny because he was getting really pissed off. I remember him snapping at me "Hey hey HEY both eyes" while I was desperately squinting through my dominant eye

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2...id.#49092678)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 11th, 2025 10:32 AM
Author: Twinkling Beady-eyed Plaza Dysfunction

180 ^ 180

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2...id.#49092755)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 11th, 2025 11:32 AM
Author: Learning disabled nubile brunch



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2...id.#49092880)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 11th, 2025 12:29 PM
Author: Arrogant hideous place of business institution

The first and only time I drove drunk I was 19 and at a house party and got blitzed and just felt like going home to lay down. I know I shouldn’t have drove but I did I was like “wow, I can’t believe how easy this is.”

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2...id.#49093122)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 11th, 2025 1:46 PM
Author: haunting excitant step-uncle's house

I was also 19 but I got home and fell asleep in the back yard (parents' house). I think they came out and made fun of me

the only reason I didn't die is because no one else was on the road. it legitimately "scared me straight" from drunk driving which you would think is flame, but I still think on it and shudder.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2...id.#49093433)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 11th, 2025 10:05 AM
Author: swollen brindle locale selfie

Got in a fight with my wife and drove to my office intending on spending the night there and then came back.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2...id.#49092688)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 11th, 2025 10:21 AM
Author: fragrant piazza

Lol this is cr. When you're about to move out and by the time you find your keys you can't remember why

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2...id.#49092725)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 11th, 2025 10:29 AM
Author: Twinkling Beady-eyed Plaza Dysfunction



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2...id.#49092745)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 15th, 2025 12:58 PM
Author: soul-stirring startled heaven generalized bond

I once went for drinks after work in the office and came back and fell asleep on some "partner's" couch. Luckily I woke up and went home around 1 AM or so

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2...id.#49103197)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 11th, 2025 10:14 AM
Author: pale deer antler electric furnace

Hit on various women who rejected me.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2...id.#49092707)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 12th, 2025 9:00 PM
Author: Ebony razzle-dazzle chapel



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2...id.#49096703)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 12th, 2025 9:00 PM
Author: Ebony razzle-dazzle chapel

My worst was a hotel front desk clerk.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2...id.#49096705)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 13th, 2025 5:47 PM
Author: jade beta puppy

did you drunkenly assume he likes fat guys?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2...id.#49098413)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 14th, 2025 11:46 AM
Author: pale deer antler electric furnace

I have done this so many times it's hard to find a worst, but I haven't drunk enough to be drunk in >50 years. When I was a young lawlyer I threw up on the managing partner's wife's shoes at a firm picnic. They thought I was drunk, but it was in fact food poisoning. Had to go to the ER.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2...id.#49100131)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 11th, 2025 10:30 AM
Author: Twinkling Beady-eyed Plaza Dysfunction

Ive done a lot of fairly stupid shit while drunk, but one that stands out in my mind is the night i jumped over the deck fence of the bar i was at because i couldn't find the exit

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2...id.#49092749)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 11th, 2025 10:35 AM
Author: Twinkling Beady-eyed Plaza Dysfunction

I also once climbed out my bedroom window to avoid inviting an annoying friend out with me

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2...id.#49092763)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 11th, 2025 10:37 AM
Author: aquamarine flatulent jew market

let a random guy on the street make a phone call with my cell phone. fell asleep with a pot of water boiling on the stove

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2...id.#49092769)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 11th, 2025 10:39 AM
Author: Sadistic persian brethren

lol

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2...id.#49092772)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 11th, 2025 11:43 AM
Author: fragrant piazza

how did the random guy turn the stove on

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2...id.#49092906)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 11th, 2025 11:53 AM
Author: aquamarine flatulent jew market

lol separate events! but i do appreciate the innuendo

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2...id.#49092941)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 11th, 2025 10:38 AM
Author: Frisky Slimy House

go to law school.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2...id.#49092770)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 11th, 2025 10:38 AM
Author: Twinkling Beady-eyed Plaza Dysfunction



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2...id.#49092771)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 11th, 2025 1:49 PM
Author: Bull headed racy candlestick maker locus



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2...id.#49093440)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 11th, 2025 10:42 AM
Author: At-the-ready swashbuckling bawdyhouse stock car

blacked out while driving, twice. made it home fine but holy shit that was dumb. both times involved a major interstate highway.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2...id.#49092777)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 11th, 2025 10:46 AM
Author: Twinkling Beady-eyed Plaza Dysfunction

Incredible poast/moniker synergy

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2...id.#49092784)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 11th, 2025 12:20 PM
Author: Copper offensive idiot preventive strike



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2...id.#49093059)



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Date: July 11th, 2025 1:49 PM
Author: Bull headed racy candlestick maker locus



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2...id.#49093441)



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Date: July 11th, 2025 10:42 AM
Author: Twinkling Beady-eyed Plaza Dysfunction

Hooked up with guy, puked in his bathroom, used towel to clean it up and turned out it was his roommates towel. Whoops!

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2...id.#49092780)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 15th, 2025 4:26 PM
Author: frozen liquid oxygen den

I love how the focal point of this short vignette is that it was *somebody else's* towel as if everything else is just noise.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2...id.#49103799)



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Date: July 11th, 2025 10:44 AM
Author: Cheese-eating federal theater stage keepsake machete

A law professor waved at me while passing me in the hallway and for some reason I thought he was going in for a high five so I swung at him wildly with my open hand trying to make contact and he ducked out of the way like I was trying to hit him. I was so bewildered by the whole interaction that I didn’t even say anything and just scurried off

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2...id.#49092781)



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Date: July 11th, 2025 10:44 AM
Author: Twinkling Beady-eyed Plaza Dysfunction



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2...id.#49092782)



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Date: July 11th, 2025 10:50 AM
Author: Vibrant house-broken personal credit line location



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2...id.#49092791)



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Date: July 11th, 2025 10:53 AM
Author: fragrant piazza

Soo cr

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2...id.#49092796)



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Date: July 11th, 2025 11:18 AM
Author: vivacious party of the first part



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2...id.#49092849)



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Date: July 11th, 2025 11:22 AM
Author: swollen brindle locale selfie

Pumpkin beers.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2...id.#49092862)



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Date: July 11th, 2025 11:34 AM
Author: Learning disabled nubile brunch



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2...id.#49092883)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 11th, 2025 12:23 PM
Author: Copper offensive idiot preventive strike



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2...id.#49093077)



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Date: July 11th, 2025 1:47 PM
Author: haunting excitant step-uncle's house



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2...id.#49093435)



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Date: July 11th, 2025 1:49 PM
Author: Bull headed racy candlestick maker locus



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2...id.#49093442)



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Date: July 11th, 2025 2:18 PM
Author: Bossy Crackhouse



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2...id.#49093542)



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Date: July 13th, 2025 12:35 AM
Author: shimmering parlour

lmfao

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2...id.#49097029)



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Date: July 13th, 2025 7:49 AM
Author: smoky newt

why were you drunk at school?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2...id.#49097258)



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Date: July 15th, 2025 2:28 PM
Author: fragrant piazza

??

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2...id.#49103497)



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Date: July 14th, 2025 11:27 AM
Author: Ebony razzle-dazzle chapel



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2...id.#49100063)



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Date: July 14th, 2025 11:43 AM
Author: Arrogant hideous place of business institution



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2...id.#49100109)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 14th, 2025 1:17 PM
Author: nighttime big goal in life address



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2...id.#49100361)



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Date: July 14th, 2025 4:00 PM
Author: dashing gas station



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2...id.#49100837)



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Date: July 11th, 2025 10:47 AM
Author: Marvelous Flirting Abode Mother

Snuck out of my parents' house and walked with some friends to a girl's house in a nearby neighborhood all while leaving a trail of empty beer cans for the police to follow and then arrest us.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2...id.#49092789)



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Date: July 11th, 2025 10:48 AM
Author: Twinkling Beady-eyed Plaza Dysfunction

Given that you now white knight for angel reese, id say your decision making skills havent improved

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2...id.#49092790)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 11th, 2025 10:55 AM
Author: Marvelous Flirting Abode Mother

i can't imagine hating on angel reese. if you watched her at all in college you know she is a great team player and has the ability to impact every play in various ways. in her second year she's leading the league in rebounds by a massive margin and has improved her offensive game and efficiency immensely.

I genuinely don't understand the hate she receives.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2...id.#49092800)



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Date: July 11th, 2025 11:22 AM
Author: fragrant piazza

She's so cool and I love her eyelashes so you know she's a female

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2...id.#49092859)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 11th, 2025 3:23 PM
Author: Marvelous Flirting Abode Mother

you're a cool female!

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2...id.#49093742)



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Date: July 11th, 2025 10:53 AM
Author: violet indian lodge

i moved to MFH and had absolutely no friends. Not even acquaintances. I used to get very drunk in those days. Sometimes a week would pass without someone talking to me, apart from a cashier.

I took to walking around with an open bottle and listening for parties, in the walk-up buildings around the EV and LES.

Id often go up and play the "Jessica invited me" (or Yessica if it was more puerto rican looking).

Sometimes this lead to me having to say "What? There's no Jessica?? I must have the wrong address, Im so sorry!"

There was an ocassional them saying, "Hey Jessica, you know this guy?"

More often, it was "hahah hey whatever dude, make yourself at home".

Only a few "Mike, I think this guy is fucking lying, he's probably came in to steal shit, hey guys c'mere, we have a fucking thief here"



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2...id.#49092797)



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Date: July 11th, 2025 11:01 AM
Author: embarrassed to the bone trip knife factory reset button

180

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2...id.#49092820)



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Date: July 12th, 2025 11:44 PM
Author: Brilliant trailer park

180 need more stories from this period of life brother

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2...id.#49096986)



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Date: July 13th, 2025 7:48 AM
Author: smoky newt



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2...id.#49097257)



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Date: July 13th, 2025 7:14 AM
Author: Mind-boggling pearly kitchen main people



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2...id.#49097221)



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Date: July 11th, 2025 10:56 AM
Author: stubborn awkward kitty cat stage

Registered for xo

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2...id.#49092803)



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Date: July 11th, 2025 11:16 AM
Author: glittery principal's office national security agency

falling off a balcony while hanging with gunner

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2...id.#49092838)



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Date: July 11th, 2025 11:16 AM
Author: Twinkling Beady-eyed Plaza Dysfunction

Wasnt it a roof?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2...id.#49092840)



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Date: July 11th, 2025 11:18 AM
Author: glittery principal's office national security agency

to be pedantic, it was a balcony hanging over another roof

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2...id.#49092846)



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Date: July 11th, 2025 11:19 AM
Author: Twinkling Beady-eyed Plaza Dysfunction

It is important to be as accurate as possible when regaling friends with tales of drunkenness

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2...id.#49092852)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 11th, 2025 11:21 AM
Author: fragrant piazza

Draw this

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2...id.#49092857)



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Date: July 11th, 2025 12:10 PM
Author: Learning disabled nubile brunch

https://i.imgur.com/ncKHJBP.png

i was waiting outside of lex's apartment in my car to pick him up, which was on the second story over a store. behind the apartment was a parking lot. for reasons that remain unclear to me lex liked to leave through the balcony and climb down the fire escape. while waiting in the car way too long he eventually scuffled up to the passenger door, disheveled, with a few cuts. the conversation went something like this:

lex: sorry, i just fell off my balcony.

gunner: what lol are you ok?

lex: yeah i'm fine.

gunner: lol ok let's go get a drink.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2...id.#49093002)



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Date: July 11th, 2025 12:15 PM
Author: fragrant piazza

this image is of a man falling backwards into a chickenwire covered alien driven skateboard with ketchup rims

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2...id.#49093029)



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Date: July 11th, 2025 1:01 PM
Author: glittery principal's office national security agency

https://ibb.co/607Mnjzv

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2...id.#49093269)



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Date: July 11th, 2025 1:03 PM
Author: Learning disabled nubile brunch

hfs 180^180^1800000!!!!!!

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2...id.#49093277)



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Date: July 11th, 2025 1:05 PM
Author: fragrant piazza

180.

Gunner is pretty handsome for an Indian

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2...id.#49093287)



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Date: July 11th, 2025 1:26 PM
Author: glittery principal's office national security agency

i'm a lucky man, no homo

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2...id.#49093350)



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Date: July 11th, 2025 1:29 PM
Author: fragrant piazza

Rank the top 5 stories itt

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2...id.#49093354)



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Date: July 11th, 2025 9:40 PM
Author: Vibrant house-broken personal credit line location

scholarship's story is #1 by far, who cares about the rest

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2...id.#49094816)



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Date: July 12th, 2025 8:58 AM
Author: fragrant piazza

muscadine wine slicing his arms open like a tin can to demonstrate knife quality was an exception addition

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2...id.#49095392)



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Date: July 12th, 2025 8:58 PM
Author: glittery principal's office national security agency



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2...id.#49096698)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 13th, 2025 7:15 AM
Author: Mind-boggling pearly kitchen main people



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2...id.#49097222)



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Date: July 13th, 2025 7:35 AM
Author: sienna boyish cuckoldry

Do t you already have concussion/Brain issues

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2...id.#49097246)



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Date: July 15th, 2025 3:58 PM
Author: Learning disabled nubile brunch

caused/exacerbated by shit like this, which was years ago and before lex got sober

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2...id.#49103713)



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Date: July 13th, 2025 2:11 PM
Author: thriller boltzmann resort

I really like it here.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2...id.#49097953)



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Date: July 11th, 2025 11:37 AM
Author: Learning disabled nubile brunch

because of my Scumbag upbringing this didn't register to me as a concerning incident

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2...id.#49092892)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 11th, 2025 11:46 AM
Author: glittery principal's office national security agency



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2...id.#49092913)



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Date: July 11th, 2025 12:40 PM
Author: Twinkling Beady-eyed Plaza Dysfunction



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2...id.#49093193)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 13th, 2025 8:07 AM
Author: smoky newt



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2...id.#49097277)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 14th, 2025 10:06 AM
Author: Comical maroon private investor



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2...id.#49099906)



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Date: July 11th, 2025 11:43 AM
Author: amber office

Is that what put you in the hospital/off xo for a long time?

This happened to a friend of mine but he didn’t maek it :(

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2...id.#49092908)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 11th, 2025 11:47 AM
Author: glittery principal's office national security agency

ah, sorry to hear that, man.

i was already having seizures and had heavy brain bleeding, but this couldn't have helped

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2...id.#49092918)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 11th, 2025 11:17 AM
Author: vivacious party of the first part

DV and i got locked up for 3 days

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2...id.#49092843)



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Date: July 11th, 2025 11:29 AM
Author: Maize Aromatic Field Tattoo

Reconciled and hooked up with an ex who later tried to kill me.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2...id.#49092875)



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Date: July 11th, 2025 11:33 AM
Author: Learning disabled nubile brunch

went to couples therapy. we, uh, had to end the session early.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2...id.#49092882)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 11th, 2025 11:41 AM
Author: fragrant piazza

much many more details to do the needful

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2...id.#49092901)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 11th, 2025 11:52 AM
Author: Learning disabled nubile brunch

we were having a fight before we were heading off to therapy. before i get in the car i drank a bunch of whiskey at once. maybe half a bottle or more. so, i didn't really start getting drunk until the session started. everyone was confused because i was fine a minute ago and i made some excuses like "idk what's wrong i'm just not feeling well." therapist decided to end the session because i was "groggy", and i drove home with my ex. at the next session the therapist was pissed and scolded me for driving. i continued to say that i was fine and just got woozy or something randomly. she give me this scowl and after that she seemed really against me in sessions. before that it felt like she was on my side more often than not. i think she dealt with a lot of drunks and could recognize i was trashed more than most people could, because i can usually keep it together really well.

i think the marriage lasted another couple months after that!

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2...id.#49092937)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 11th, 2025 12:23 PM
Author: fragrant piazza

Mmhm

Probably hard to pull off the cool fratty drunk guy at couples therapy.

I rate this as number 2 stupid after me getting prescription lenses while being drunk

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2...id.#49093075)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 11th, 2025 12:29 PM
Author: Learning disabled nubile brunch

i'm very gregarious and convincing. doesn't really work with someone trained on drunks i guess.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2...id.#49093123)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 11th, 2025 12:34 PM
Author: fragrant piazza

Yes it's literally why your wife brought you there

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2...id.#49093158)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 11th, 2025 1:06 PM
Author: Learning disabled nubile brunch

you fags are oracles when it comes to male/female dynamics and i think you're probably right that she needed someone i couldn't just charm into being on my side.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2...id.#49093292)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 11th, 2025 11:42 AM
Author: amber office

Doing couples therapy with someone you aren’t at least engaged to is… idk what but it’s bad

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2...id.#49092903)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 11th, 2025 11:44 AM
Author: Learning disabled nubile brunch

this was with my exwife!

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2...id.#49092910)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 11th, 2025 11:47 AM
Author: amber office

I didnt know you were a divorcee

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2...id.#49092917)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 11th, 2025 12:12 PM
Author: Learning disabled nubile brunch

still am too

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2...id.#49093015)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 11th, 2025 12:16 PM
Author: cerebral half-breed mood

Many layers to this fag’s loserdom

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2...id.#49093038)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 11th, 2025 12:19 PM
Author: Learning disabled nubile brunch

here's another crazy story about my ex-wife: she never cucked me with other men, emasculated me by sharing embarrassing details about me publicly, or tried to damage my life in any way. we also remained friends for many years after and i never once desperately ran back to her because i couldn't get laid any other way.

haha crazy right?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2...id.#49093053)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 11th, 2025 12:26 PM
Author: cerebral half-breed mood

“I’m a huge simp”

great poast, champ

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2...id.#49093106)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 11th, 2025 12:28 PM
Author: Learning disabled nubile brunch

how are you even real? can't wait to see how this crash out ends.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2...id.#49093116)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 11th, 2025 12:31 PM
Author: cerebral half-breed mood

You’re too in your 40s to talk like that

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2...id.#49093135)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 11th, 2025 12:35 PM
Author: Learning disabled nubile brunch

and you're a bit too old for "mom please dont take my computer, i promise ill look for a job after i pwn these kikes on autoadmit!"

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2...id.#49093166)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 11th, 2025 11:52 AM
Author: vivacious party of the first part

other things:

1. threw a full can of beer into a crowd of people at a club called Sonar in baltimore. got jumped and absolutely fucked up, face was all bruised, like my entire face was a black eye. a friend of mine hit one of the guys who did it in the face with a cinderblock outside the club. had to go to classes as a 3L and to my job at the national archives' gc office with a fucked up face for 2 weeks. i said it was a basketball injury lol.

2. blacked out and got thrown out of an uber in chicago at like 2 am. woke up in an elevator in a parking garage at 5. found my way back to my hotel, had to be at a biz dev presentation at 9 am. someone had to cover for me.

3. got in multiple fights with that stripper i was fooling around with as we spent a week traveling from hotel to hotel in LA/SD. was blackout drunk almost the whole time.

there are others, but these are top of mind.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2...id.#49092939)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 11th, 2025 11:55 AM
Author: aquamarine flatulent jew market

i feel like you would win this thread, not that it's a competition. you didn't even hit on anything that involves waking up next to a transsexual prostitute

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2...id.#49092950)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 11th, 2025 12:15 PM
Author: vivacious party of the first part

i am sure i have other wild shit. for overall zany things you've done on booze and drugs, i bet i would win. i was an absolute mess for a few years.

showed up to labor negotiations still high on coke once. another time i was bargaining with a unit of nurses and the union rep asked me if i needed medical attention. i was on a 2 day bender, coming down off coke and was basically green.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2...id.#49093034)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 11th, 2025 12:31 PM
Author: aquamarine flatulent jew market



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2...id.#49093136)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 11th, 2025 11:59 AM
Author: Learning disabled nubile brunch

one time i blacked out on a date. it was really going well i thought. i had a few too many and suddenly she excused herself but not before making sure i called an uber. i don't remember anything after that except coming to outside in the city in the middle of winter. i've never been so cold in my life. i went to an emergency room to warm up. i called another uber and got in, then blacked out again. woke up in bed with no phone or car, not remembering anything that happened after the date except for being freezing in the city for a moment.

had to call my mom to go get my car. then i had to use my cell phone tracking app to find my phone, which was in the second uber in the driver's apartment complex. i found the car and could see my phone in the back seat. i sent a message to uber about it but i guess the driver wasn't available. i went around the apartment complex asking whose car it was. after trying every door i gave up and left a note on the windshield.

the driver called me that night and she gave me my phone. i remember it was on valentine's day and she met me in a red lobster parking lot where she was getting dinner with her husband.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2...id.#49092964)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 11th, 2025 9:39 PM
Author: vivacious party of the first part

180. Louis cannon type story

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2...id.#49094815)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 13th, 2025 3:33 PM
Author: smoky newt

Lmao

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2...id.#49098106)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 11th, 2025 12:16 PM
Author: fragrant piazza

your stories are 180 when you consider that you have been outed and you must be the biggest pencil neck dweeb on earth. its nearly impossible to imagine that guy getting into any of these antics

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2...id.#49093039)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 11th, 2025 12:19 PM
Author: vivacious party of the first part

wild stuff, man.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2...id.#49093056)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 11th, 2025 12:25 PM
Author: vivacious party of the first part

another one was i blacked out at my friend's house back in 05 and tried to drive home. for some reason i drove to my childhood home's neighborhood. woke up at 7 am with the car running in front of a cop's house, but luckily the cop had recently been killed in the line of duty.

oh, this is a good one. in 2012 i ate a bunch of ambien and drank a 6 pack. then drove to the liquor store to get more beer and was changing out CDs in my car and crashed into a truck. i fled and went home and texted my wife (she was out) "woah someone just hit my car and took off lol" but about 10 mins later the cops came to my house. i remember them being in my condo and one of them laughing at me that i'd have to report this to the bar, etc. another cop was like "hey genius, you know your VIN was on the panel of your car that you left at the scene, don't you?"

i was 100% out of it and hallucinating. they didn't charge me with DUI bc i was no longer at the scene, but they told me they knew i was drunk.

i wound up making up a story about taking the med as prescribed and sleep driving. i got off.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2...id.#49093100)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 11th, 2025 12:31 PM
Author: vivacious party of the first part

oh shit, i forgot this one. in december 2017, i was about to be promoted to partner at baker hostetler. the guy who put me up had a end of year get together at the Palm in DC (he is one of the caricatures on the wall). there were like 15 people there. i got absolutely wrecked on martinis. i was obviously drunk in front of him but thankfully he left. the restaurant ultimately asked me to leave and i lost my phone and a coworker had to order me an uber.



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2...id.#49093132)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 12th, 2025 11:27 PM
Author: Ebony razzle-dazzle chapel

we should party sometime

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2...id.#49096948)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 13th, 2025 3:03 PM
Author: vivacious party of the first part

i'm sober now but i'll RAGE with you anyway.



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2...id.#49098056)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 11th, 2025 12:21 PM
Author: pearl tank

accidentally used the diesel can instead of the kerosene can (for a kerosene heater), woke up in blackface, entire cabin coated with soot



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2...id.#49093064)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 11th, 2025 12:30 PM
Author: idiotic sexy native

Came back home after drinking at the bar and fell asleep spooning by black lab who was 15 years old and I knew she was going to die soon. My lab didn’t like to be cuddled so she probably got up and hobbled away as soon as I passed out.

The dog bed was right in front of my security door. I kept the front door open because it was summer and no A/C.

I awoke to my next door neighbor, a black nurse, coming home from her night shift. I hear, “Oh, chimata! What are you doing?”

It was pretty embarrassing.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2...id.#49093126)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 11th, 2025 12:32 PM
Author: vivacious party of the first part

wait, you're telling me you have a black wife AND you had a black lab?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2...id.#49093139)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 11th, 2025 12:40 PM
Author: idiotic sexy native

Yeah but now I have a yellow lab to even things out.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2...id.#49093191)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 11th, 2025 12:41 PM
Author: Twinkling Beady-eyed Plaza Dysfunction

You have a black wife and yellow lab? You got those two mixed up, friend

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2...id.#49093202)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 11th, 2025 1:36 PM
Author: idiotic sexy native

OFS

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2...id.#49093383)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 11th, 2025 2:56 PM
Author: Crawly Codepig Sandwich



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2...id.#49093641)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 11th, 2025 1:02 PM
Author: At-the-ready swashbuckling bawdyhouse stock car

now you need a yellow mistress

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2...id.#49093273)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 11th, 2025 1:04 PM
Author: Bonkers legal warrant

I was a knife salesman for Cutco knives and showed up to a sales appointment drunk and proceeded to cut myself in multiple spots during the demonstration, and got the blood all over my white shirt. The people were terrified and bought a bunch of knives just to get rid of me.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2...id.#49093283)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 11th, 2025 1:06 PM
Author: fragrant piazza

180000000000

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2...id.#49093288)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 11th, 2025 1:32 PM
Author: Twinkling Beady-eyed Plaza Dysfunction



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2...id.#49093367)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 11th, 2025 1:35 PM
Author: idiotic sexy native

lol

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2...id.#49093382)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 11th, 2025 1:43 PM
Author: Cheese-eating federal theater stage keepsake machete



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2...id.#49093417)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 11th, 2025 1:44 PM
Author: Learning disabled nubile brunch



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2...id.#49093421)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 11th, 2025 1:50 PM
Author: Bull headed racy candlestick maker locus

lmao

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2...id.#49093446)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 11th, 2025 1:50 PM
Author: lascivious karate feces



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2...id.#49093447)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 11th, 2025 1:51 PM
Author: Claret Cuckold Pisswyrm

"Go and do likewise, gents."

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2...id.#49093450)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 11th, 2025 2:00 PM
Author: Learning disabled nubile brunch



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2...id.#49093486)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 11th, 2025 2:34 PM
Author: haunting excitant step-uncle's house



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2...id.#49093577)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 11th, 2025 2:40 PM
Author: Bull headed racy candlestick maker locus



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2...id.#49093586)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 11th, 2025 9:42 PM
Author: Cream psychic



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2...id.#49094818)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 13th, 2025 8:08 AM
Author: smoky newt



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2...id.#49097278)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 14th, 2025 11:40 AM
Author: Slate Massive Depressive



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2...id.#49100090)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 11th, 2025 1:51 PM
Author: vivacious party of the first part



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2...id.#49093452)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 11th, 2025 2:02 PM
Author: haunting excitant step-uncle's house



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2...id.#49093497)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 13th, 2025 12:03 AM
Author: Insecure charismatic indirect expression sound barrier

this would make a great scene in a movie

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2...id.#49097013)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 13th, 2025 12:45 AM
Author: shimmering parlour



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2...id.#49097041)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 13th, 2025 7:18 AM
Author: Mind-boggling pearly kitchen main people



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2...id.#49097226)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 14th, 2025 10:10 AM
Author: Comical maroon private investor



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2...id.#49099912)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 14th, 2025 11:27 AM
Author: Ebony razzle-dazzle chapel

180

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2...id.#49100060)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 14th, 2025 5:37 PM
Author: dark regret



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2...id.#49101150)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 11th, 2025 1:53 PM
Author: Bull headed racy candlestick maker locus

This thread delivered. My story involves getting extremely drunk at a summer associate event. Being extremely drunk I figured I shouldn't get a cab but should "walk it off" on my way home. For some reason I either drunk dialed my parents or they called me and I stupidly picked up and vaguely got in some huge fight with them, the details or even high level of which I had no clue about the next day. I finally staggered home and my dog and wife were both disgusted.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2...id.#49093458)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 11th, 2025 11:59 PM
Author: swollen brindle locale selfie

One time I passed out in a Subway parking lot. The cops found me and went through my phone to find someone to take me. They called my grandma, luckily she was asleep since it was late. They went down the list and found a friend to come get me. Glad I didn't get run over.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2...id.#49095073)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 11th, 2025 1:59 PM
Author: milky bearded school

fucked up my favorite jeans and a pair of shoes i really liked because I fell into a retention pond in Orlando while taking a shortcut to a gas station to buy more beer after I went out for the night on a work trip and wanted to keep drinking. by some miracle I actually brought a second pair of shoes because the next day I flew directly to Washington DC to attend the 2016 inauguration of Donald Trump.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2...id.#49093482)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 13th, 2025 4:44 AM
Author: mustard rough-skinned lodge roommate

I severely fucked up my Speedmaster drunkenly falling up concrete stairs leading to a Jimmy John’s.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2...id.#49097176)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 11th, 2025 2:00 PM
Author: maniacal stage

sex with men for money

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2...id.#49093487)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 11th, 2025 2:07 PM
Author: fragrant piazza

How much did you pay

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2...id.#49093508)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 11th, 2025 2:59 PM
Author: maniacal stage

cant remember, was drunk

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2...id.#49093648)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 11th, 2025 5:49 PM
Author: Impressive laser beams center



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2...id.#49094209)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 11th, 2025 2:16 PM
Author: lascivious karate feces



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2...id.#49093538)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 11th, 2025 3:24 PM
Author: green theater voyeur

Hit on my SIL

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2...id.#49093746)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 11th, 2025 3:53 PM
Author: pearl tank

can you provide details

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2...id.#49093813)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 11th, 2025 9:42 PM
Author: Garnet Diverse Hunting Ground

I outran the cops going about 115 mph one night, although I was drunk and high so you can't just blame the booze, but it saved me in its own way

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2...id.#49094819)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 11th, 2025 11:00 PM
Author: vivacious party of the first part

180, did that scare you sober for a while?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2...id.#49094957)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 11th, 2025 11:01 PM
Author: Garnet Diverse Hunting Ground

not that I recall

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2...id.#49094959)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 12th, 2025 9:13 AM
Author: Learning disabled nubile brunch

180

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2...id.#49095406)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 12th, 2025 9:29 PM
Author: vivacious party of the first part



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2...id.#49096758)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 14th, 2025 3:00 PM
Author: Sadistic persian brethren



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2...id.#49100657)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 12th, 2025 12:52 AM
Author: Talented mauve meetinghouse mexican

I got into a fight with a Canadian goose. I lost; badly.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2...id.#49095144)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 12th, 2025 8:59 PM
Author: aquamarine flatulent jew market

vicious animals

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2...id.#49096701)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 12th, 2025 11:35 PM
Author: Talented mauve meetinghouse mexican

I lost part of my scalp.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2...id.#49096970)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 14th, 2025 11:29 AM
Author: Ebony razzle-dazzle chapel

nasty motherfuckers

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2...id.#49100066)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 12th, 2025 1:14 AM
Author: crusty stag film toaster

Apply and then get accepted to law school

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2...id.#49095157)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 12th, 2025 11:36 PM
Author: Talented mauve meetinghouse mexican

Lol

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2...id.#49096971)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 12th, 2025 11:36 PM
Author: Vigorous nursing home

Major crimes unit

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2...id.#49096973)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 14th, 2025 10:27 PM
Author: Razzle big-titted faggotry ape



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2...id.#49101872)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 13th, 2025 1:20 AM
Author: Pink adulterous halford

I was at a sushi bar alone and started doing sake shots with the wait staff after they closed. For some reason we started drinking tequila and I blacked out. They somehow found my home and dropped me off at like 4am. No idea what happened in between

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2...id.#49097065)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 13th, 2025 2:27 AM
Author: idiotic sexy native

In my early 20s, I was working in a chain pharmacy and a co-worker asked me to DJ her wedding. I had never DJ’d anything before. I had a CD player and two huge bass amps. I got drunk as shit during the wedding, slurring, trying to be funny on the microphone, getting blank stares. I didn’t play any typical wedding songs. Didn’t have any in my collection. I had classic rock. Basically played my favorite songs all night to a bunch of people I didn’t know, getting drunk for free.

There was this cringey moment where I thought I was being smooth by introducing a song with some commentary about the band. You don’t know what band it is I’m talking about because that is supposed to be suspenseful and the big reveal came as I hit play: “We Can Work It Out” by the Beatles.

I was so drunk the new husband drove my truck to his house and let me sleep in my truck on the street. It was a Chevy S-10 and he thought he was pressing the emergency brake with his foot but he stepped on the vent lever, crushing it.

I think she paid me $100 and don’t think we ever talked about it afterwards.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2...id.#49097108)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 13th, 2025 8:21 AM
Author: Onyx heady stead useless brakes



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2...id.#49097298)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 14th, 2025 11:44 AM
Author: Learning disabled nubile brunch



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2...id.#49100119)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 14th, 2025 11:49 AM
Author: lascivious karate feces



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2...id.#49100149)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 13th, 2025 4:21 AM
Author: Razzle big-titted faggotry ape

felt something

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2...id.#49097173)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 13th, 2025 7:09 AM
Author: Naked Mentally Impaired Lay

OP is a broke ass gay faggot with literal AIDSs in his 60s.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2...id.#49097217)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 13th, 2025 8:11 AM
Author: smoky newt

drive drunk hundreds of times, sometimes having to cover one eye

was groping with the boss’ daughter in the corner of the bar (there were pics)

numerous fights that could have ended badly

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2...id.#49097283)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 13th, 2025 1:38 PM
Author: Arrogant hideous place of business institution

Fell for Mossad honeypot operation and fucked a teen on hidden camera

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2...id.#49097879)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 14th, 2025 10:22 AM
Author: cerebral half-breed mood



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2...id.#49099929)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 15th, 2025 1:29 PM
Author: Bull headed racy candlestick maker locus



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2...id.#49103335)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 14th, 2025 10:03 AM
Author: vivacious party of the first part

went to see hotel for dogs in the movie theater

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2...id.#49099900)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 14th, 2025 10:04 AM
Author: Spectacular rose gaping prole

Legal work

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2...id.#49099901)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 14th, 2025 11:39 AM
Author: cerebral half-breed mood

Have never done anything dumb

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2...id.#49100088)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 14th, 2025 1:11 PM
Author: Comical maroon private investor

Was bowling and my friend was poking me so I “accidentally” threw my bowling ball at her backwards. It bounced and shattered the beer mug her boyfriend was holding severing an artery and sending him to the ER.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2...id.#49100350)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 14th, 2025 3:02 PM
Author: Sadistic persian brethren



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2...id.#49100660)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 14th, 2025 3:57 PM
Author: idiotic sexy native

Hilarious for everyone involved!

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2...id.#49100823)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 14th, 2025 10:27 PM
Author: Fluffy base

Not committed suicide

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2...id.#49101873)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 14th, 2025 10:32 PM
Author: 180 spot sneaky criminal

Haha ohhhhhh kayyyyy

Pushed over a motorcycle

Egged a dudes car

Hit on a friends GF

Fucked a few chonkers

Bough box set of Tales from the crypt (turned out kind of 180)

Drove a LOT including in my ‘94 junker with a busted headlight

Top of mind



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2...id.#49101880)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 15th, 2025 11:59 AM
Author: nighttime big goal in life address

when I went out and had an incredible date with the most perfect and cool girl that I've ever gone out with (we were literally talking about our future together, how similar we were etc), went home drunk, saw some dude beating off from my condo patio looking into another unit, started laughing uncontrollably and tried to call her to tell her about it. She didn't answer so I sent some drunken text with no context that I just saw some guy beating off.

She took days to respond to my text and I completely ruined it.

I then went on a spree of hundreds of failed first dates and constant rejection and disappointment

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2...id.#49103002)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 15th, 2025 12:05 PM
Author: Vibrant house-broken personal credit line location



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2...id.#49103014)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 15th, 2025 2:30 PM
Author: fragrant piazza

literally talking about our future together, how similar we were tp

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2...id.#49103504)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 15th, 2025 3:55 PM
Author: Learning disabled nubile brunch



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2...id.#49103708)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 15th, 2025 12:56 PM
Author: soul-stirring startled heaven generalized bond

Went to a gun range.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5749078&forum_id=2...id.#49103190)