What surprised me was how disconnected she became once she got there. Before she left, I asked a few times if she'd send me the names of the hotels she was staying at, mostly for safety, but she never did. On the first night I heard from her around dinner time, then nothing for the rest of the evening. By around 3 a.m., after not knowing where she was staying or hearing anything, I got worried enough to message her sister to ask if she'd heard from her. It wasn't accusatory as I just wanted to know she was okay, but both my wife and her sister later felt I had overreacted.

For the rest of the trip there was very little contact in the evenings. One night she sent me a goodnight message, I called because we hadn't spoken in a few days, and she didn't respond for about 45 minutes. Later she admitted she hadn't actually been back at the hotel yet when she sent the message and said she didn't want me worrying about her being out late. After the trip, she apologized and said she got completely immersed in the experience and should have communicated better, but I'm still struggling to understand whether what happened is actually pretty normal for people who solo travel.

I'm not asking whether she cheated, I have no evidence of that, and that's not what I'm trying to figure out. I'm simply wondering if married solo travelers commonly disconnect this much from their spouse, especially when their partner is home looking after young children.

Is it normal not to share where you're staying, to go days without really checking in, or to intentionally put your relationship on the back burner while you're traveling? Or would most of you still make an effort to stay connected?

I'm genuinely open to hearing if my expectations were unrealistic. I'm just trying to understand whether this is typical solo travel behavior or whether my reaction is understandable.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5890548&forum_id=2...id.#50052454)