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a day in the life of a Snail: an original XO Choose Your Own Adventure Novel

You don't have any work today because you basically only wor...
Alcoholic Flickering Sanctuary Feces
  12/29/15
b!
pearl step-uncle's house nowag
  12/29/15
C
supple slimy range
  12/29/15
...
emerald field background story
  12/29/15
c
Razzle church building
  12/29/15
a
provocative primrose messiness telephone
  12/29/15
a
Disgusting pozpig
  12/29/15
Next chapter please
pearl step-uncle's house nowag
  12/29/15
I can', A & B ar tied :(
Alcoholic Flickering Sanctuary Feces
  12/29/15
...
emerald field background story
  12/29/15
Fine I change my vote to A.
pearl step-uncle's house nowag
  12/29/15
a provides nutrition and wont let you starve
vermilion beady-eyed old irish cottage
  12/29/15
...
emerald field background story
  12/29/15
?
vermilion beady-eyed old irish cottage
  12/29/15
...
emerald field background story
  12/29/15
You lug the turkey chili home as you wonder what it would fe...
Alcoholic Flickering Sanctuary Feces
  12/29/15
...
emerald field background story
  12/29/15
c for sure
vermilion beady-eyed old irish cottage
  12/29/15
C
Disgusting pozpig
  12/29/15
c
insanely creepy smoky bawdyhouse ceo
  12/29/15
Xo
supple slimy range
  12/29/15
chaturbate
Marvelous orchestra pit
  12/30/15
C!
pearl step-uncle's house nowag
  12/29/15
NEXT CHAPTER
pearl step-uncle's house nowag
  12/29/15
everyone in this thread unzips.
carmine cruise ship
  12/29/15
...
emerald field background story
  12/29/15
...
supple slimy range
  12/29/15
Did they turn off Snailmo's electricity?
insanely creepy smoky bawdyhouse ceo
  12/29/15
no, i think he found a job, and a girlfriend
Multi-colored topaz stage patrolman
  12/29/15
lol ouch
Razzle-dazzle glassy locus jap
  12/30/15
he is busy doing tinychat
vermilion beady-eyed old irish cottage
  12/29/15
...
hairless burgundy haunted graveyard
  12/30/15
...
emerald field background story
  12/30/15
Topic has amazing potential.
fragrant bespoke station clown
  12/30/15
You log into chaturbate in order to watch a session of some ...
Alcoholic Flickering Sanctuary Feces
  12/30/15
2
Razzle-dazzle glassy locus jap
  12/30/15
I choose 2, sounds like a great opportunity to bash BOOMER s...
fragrant bespoke station clown
  12/30/15
police
Marvelous orchestra pit
  12/30/15
1
Disgusting pozpig
  12/30/15
lol r u like a genderfuluid snail or sth
supple slimy range
  12/30/15
...
supple slimy range
  01/02/16
4 and 180
insanely creepy smoky bawdyhouse ceo
  12/30/15
Wake up and post please.
insanely creepy smoky bawdyhouse ceo
  12/30/15
...
supple slimy range
  12/30/15
18000000000000000000000000000000000
Concupiscible flirting community account trailer park
  01/11/16
...
indecent shrine philosopher-king
  11/05/20
next chapter please!
excitant jet-lagged tanning salon
  11/05/20
...
bungulator
  12/13/25
...
Saffron lascivious native
  11/05/20


Poast new message in this thread



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 9:54 PM
Author: Alcoholic Flickering Sanctuary Feces

You don't have any work today because you basically only work two days out of seven at most. Instead, you are at the local grocery store, pondering how to use your EBT card.

Snow falls to the ground outside as you wish you could drink yourself silly, fall into a snow pile, and never wake up. The store has a pungent odor that one naturally associates with inner-city grocery stores.

Everything in the store reminds you that CAPITALISM is bullshit FRAUD AND LIES where proles fucking SCAVENGE to live when faggot parasite bankers and lawyers and eating out to celebrate RAPING this country and everyone in it. Kill all elites by tearing their limbs off with horses and their families too.

Anyways, you only have enough remaining on your EBT to purchase one of the three products on sale:

a) six cans of turkey chili

b) two liters of diet coke

c) a bunch of bananas

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2...id.#29480960)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 9:56 PM
Author: pearl step-uncle's house nowag

b!

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2...id.#29480979)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 11:15 PM
Author: supple slimy range

C

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2...id.#29481594)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 9:55 PM
Author: emerald field background story



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2...id.#29480970)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 9:56 PM
Author: Razzle church building

c

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2...id.#29480973)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 9:56 PM
Author: provocative primrose messiness telephone

a

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2...id.#29480975)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 9:57 PM
Author: Disgusting pozpig

a

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2...id.#29480989)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 10:11 PM
Author: pearl step-uncle's house nowag

Next chapter please

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2...id.#29481133)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 10:15 PM
Author: Alcoholic Flickering Sanctuary Feces

I can', A & B ar tied :(

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2...id.#29481164)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 10:20 PM
Author: emerald field background story



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2...id.#29481212)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 10:21 PM
Author: pearl step-uncle's house nowag

Fine I change my vote to A.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2...id.#29481216)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 10:22 PM
Author: vermilion beady-eyed old irish cottage

a

provides nutrition and wont let you starve

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2...id.#29481222)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 10:23 PM
Author: emerald field background story



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2...id.#29481225)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 10:30 PM
Author: vermilion beady-eyed old irish cottage

?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2...id.#29481285)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 10:31 PM
Author: emerald field background story



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2...id.#29481289)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 10:30 PM
Author: Alcoholic Flickering Sanctuary Feces

You lug the turkey chili home as you wonder what it would feel like if you shoved it all up your ass. Your death would be a slightly less humiliating than your actual "life".

Once you get home, you throw it all and start smacking it open with your broken can opener. It's broken because you got it from the Dollar Tree a year ago and you use it all the fucking time because you're too fucking depressed to cook FUCK OBAMA'S AMERICA.

After microwaving it, you douse it in tabasco sauce that you STOLE from Chipotle because LLJL fuck those shitlib faggots, it's so 180 to go at peak hour and just fucking steal sauce. You hope you get arrested one day because at least jail provides life structure.

While eating, you have four tabs open on the computer. None of them are XO. Which do you go on while eating your SHITchili

a) facebook

b) ashemaletv

c) chaturbate

d) drudgereport

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2...id.#29481288)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 10:31 PM
Author: emerald field background story



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2...id.#29481296)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 10:32 PM
Author: vermilion beady-eyed old irish cottage

c for sure

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2...id.#29481299)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 10:33 PM
Author: Disgusting pozpig

C

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2...id.#29481311)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 10:56 PM
Author: insanely creepy smoky bawdyhouse ceo

c

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2...id.#29481436)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 11:16 PM
Author: supple slimy range

Xo

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2...id.#29481600)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 30th, 2015 12:58 AM
Author: Marvelous orchestra pit

chaturbate

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2...id.#29482189)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 10:31 PM
Author: pearl step-uncle's house nowag

C!

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2...id.#29481291)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 10:51 PM
Author: pearl step-uncle's house nowag

NEXT CHAPTER

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2...id.#29481403)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 11:00 PM
Author: carmine cruise ship

everyone in this thread unzips.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2...id.#29481469)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 11:15 PM
Author: emerald field background story



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2...id.#29481596)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 11:14 PM
Author: supple slimy range



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2...id.#29481589)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 11:33 PM
Author: insanely creepy smoky bawdyhouse ceo

Did they turn off Snailmo's electricity?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2...id.#29481713)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 11:39 PM
Author: Multi-colored topaz stage patrolman

no, i think he found a job, and a girlfriend

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2...id.#29481748)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 30th, 2015 12:41 AM
Author: Razzle-dazzle glassy locus jap

lol ouch

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2...id.#29482097)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 11:47 PM
Author: vermilion beady-eyed old irish cottage

he is busy doing tinychat

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2...id.#29481804)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 30th, 2015 12:38 AM
Author: hairless burgundy haunted graveyard



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2...id.#29482070)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 30th, 2015 12:39 AM
Author: emerald field background story



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2...id.#29482079)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 30th, 2015 12:40 AM
Author: fragrant bespoke station clown

Topic has amazing potential.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2...id.#29482091)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 30th, 2015 1:01 AM
Author: Alcoholic Flickering Sanctuary Feces

You log into chaturbate in order to watch a session of some dude that you've been following since you found his pictures on a /pol/ thread describing how DEGENERATE transexuals are. JFC shitlibs are really disgusting just trying to shove all of this trans shit down our throat. fuck Obama, we should drag out all media FAGGOTS from their home like that 180000 scene in the Dark Knight Arises where Bane39 takes over Gotham.

You shovel turkey chili in your mouth and you can't help stop thinking about Benzo's asshole and retching, so you put it away for a bit.

Instead, you decide to FURIOUSLY stroke your SPERMWYRM to the long-haired crossdresser on the stream as he seductively WIGGLES his puckered BUTTHOLE.

It is enjoyable and you can see the light at the end of the tunnel, until something horrifying pops out of his shirt. He has BREASTS now. Your wyrm reddens and shrinkens as you realize that he is now identifying as a "she" and has become taking hormones. In disgust, you throw off your Beats!(tm) headphones (they were a gift) and close the window. You zip up your pants angrily as yet another fine day RUINED by libs.

You decide to research more possible career paths that you will never accomplish while you finish your chili. What do you research?

1) Military

2) Police

3) Education

4) Computer Science

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2...id.#29482203)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 30th, 2015 1:03 AM
Author: Razzle-dazzle glassy locus jap

2

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2...id.#29482210)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 30th, 2015 1:03 AM
Author: fragrant bespoke station clown

I choose 2, sounds like a great opportunity to bash BOOMER scum.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2...id.#29482211)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 30th, 2015 1:08 AM
Author: Marvelous orchestra pit

police

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2...id.#29482227)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 30th, 2015 1:09 AM
Author: Disgusting pozpig

1

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2...id.#29482232)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 30th, 2015 1:49 AM
Author: supple slimy range

lol r u like a genderfuluid snail or sth

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2...id.#29482337)



Reply Favorite

Date: January 2nd, 2016 2:50 PM
Author: supple slimy range



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2...id.#29505583)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 30th, 2015 2:02 AM
Author: insanely creepy smoky bawdyhouse ceo

4 and 180

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2...id.#29482377)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 30th, 2015 11:26 AM
Author: insanely creepy smoky bawdyhouse ceo

Wake up and post please.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2...id.#29483717)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 30th, 2015 11:10 PM
Author: supple slimy range



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2...id.#29488970)



Reply Favorite

Date: January 11th, 2016 10:55 AM
Author: Concupiscible flirting community account trailer park

18000000000000000000000000000000000

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2...id.#29570485)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 5th, 2020 8:16 AM
Author: indecent shrine philosopher-king



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2...id.#41284039)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 5th, 2020 8:22 AM
Author: excitant jet-lagged tanning salon

next chapter please!

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2...id.#41284068)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 13th, 2025 2:14 AM
Author: bungulator



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2...id.#49506318)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 5th, 2020 8:34 AM
Author: Saffron lascivious native



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2...id.#41284137)