By the end of the day, with most associates having done something, I got really mad and slammed the door to my office. I slammed it so hard that some of the door facing flew off. Supposedly, it came close to hitting one of the associates at her desk. After that, all of the associates in the office except one (the one who I yelled at this morning) walked out. I followed them outside and told them if they leave without permission, don’t come back tomorrow. They still left.

Two of the five who left, I did not have any problem with today. I did not yell at them, even though one of them did what she wanted today, not what I asked.

One of them was the husband of one of the two who I didn’t yell at. The wife in this couple has a text group with all the associates on it. She has been sending out text messages talking B.S.

I know that I shouldn’t get so angry and yell at them. I am sorry that the wood almost hit someone. She happens to be our newest associate.

I am still so angry that I don’t want any of them back, but I need them. The way everyone has been acting lately, doing what they want, I am considering closing the firm.

I know I messed up, but I don’t think they all should have walked out without permission.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5769982&forum_id=2Reputation#49237801)

You're right that you shouldn't have lost your temper like that - yelling, cursing, and especially slamming the door hard enough to break it and potentially injure someone crosses important workplace boundaries. That kind of physical outburst can feel genuinely threatening to employees, even if you didn't intend harm. The fact that your newest associate was nearly hit by flying debris is particularly concerning.

Your employees walking out wasn't just about today - it was likely the culmination of ongoing tensions. When five out of six people leave together, including those you didn't directly confront, they're signaling that the workplace environment has become untenable for them. The fact that even uninvolved employees felt compelled to leave suggests they see a pattern that concerns them.

Here's what I'd suggest considering:

First, take tonight to cool down completely before making any decisions. Your firm needs these people, and they likely need their jobs too.

Tomorrow, you might want to reach out with a genuine apology - not one that includes "but you were doing things wrong too." Acknowledge that your behavior was unacceptable, that you're taking responsibility, and that you want to work together to address the underlying issues professionally.

The performance and communication problems you're describing are real and need addressing, but they require calm, clear leadership and possibly new systems or expectations-setting meetings, not anger.

If this pattern of getting extremely angry is recurring, it might be worth considering some support for stress management or leadership coaching. Running a firm is incredibly stressful, but your team needs to feel safe at work.

What do you think would need to change for both you and your team to move forward productively?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5769982&forum_id=2Reputation#49237810)

They're gonna move against you.

This level of outright defiance was designed to send a message to the others that they no longer respect your leadership.

Gather your (remaining) allies and prepare.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5769982&forum_id=2Reputation#49239396)

"I'm gay."

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5769982&forum_id=2Reputation#49239448)

I want to speak plainly about what happened yesterday.

I lost my temper. I yelled, I used language I shouldn’t have, and I slammed my office door hard enough to damage it. That was unprofessional, inappropriate, and on me—no excuses. I regret it, especially knowing that someone could have been hurt. I let my frustration boil over, and I take full responsibility for how I handled the situation.

That said, there are also real issues we need to address as a team. Multiple instructions were ignored or disregarded, and that’s not sustainable in any work environment. I expect tasks to be done the way they’re assigned, not the way someone chooses. That expectation isn’t changing.

Still, how I reacted to the situation made things worse, not better. I understand that some of you walked out because of how things unfolded. I don’t agree with how that was handled, but I get it.

If you are interested in returning and working in a more professional and respectful environment—on all sides—I’m open to that. But it’s going to take a reset in how we operate, communicate, and treat each other. That includes me.

If you’d like to come back, please reach out to me directly by [insert day/time—e.g., Monday at 10 a.m.]. We’ll schedule a time to talk, either one-on-one or as a group.

I know this isn’t easy. It’s not easy for me either. But I’m willing to move forward if you are.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5769982&forum_id=2Reputation#49240326)

⸻

Strengths

• Owns the behavior directly (“I yelled… slammed the door… no excuses”). That builds credibility.

• Acknowledges the impact (danger, unprofessionalism, others walking out).

• Signals willingness to reset and improve.

Risks

• Tone shift: You move from apology to blame (“instructions were ignored… expectation isn’t changing”) in the same breath. That can dilute the sincerity of the apology and make it seem conditional.

• Invitation wording: “If you’d like to come back” could sound like people left their jobs permanently. It may feel harsher than you intend.

• Potential legal/HR implications: Admitting to door damage and physical conduct could expose liability if not handled carefully. Best to keep language factual but not over-dramatic.

Suggested Adjustments

• Separate the apology from the performance/expectation reminder. Deliver the accountability first, clearly, without qualifiers.

• Reframe the performance piece as a shared commitment rather than a scolding.

• Make the invitation about moving forward together, not about deciding whether to “come back.”

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5769982&forum_id=2Reputation#49240337)

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5769982&forum_id=2Reputation#49240488)