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a day in the life of a Snail: an original XO Choose Your Own Adventure Novel

You don't have any work today because you basically only wor...
avocado gas station faggot firefighter
  12/29/15
b!
Cheese-eating dragon
  12/29/15
C
Stirring Transparent Business Firm
  12/29/15
...
Laughsome coldplay fan
  12/29/15
c
Honey-headed private investor
  12/29/15
a
embarrassed to the bone chapel
  12/29/15
a
fluffy house
  12/29/15
Next chapter please
Cheese-eating dragon
  12/29/15
I can', A & B ar tied :(
avocado gas station faggot firefighter
  12/29/15
...
Laughsome coldplay fan
  12/29/15
Fine I change my vote to A.
Cheese-eating dragon
  12/29/15
a provides nutrition and wont let you starve
chartreuse cruise ship macaca
  12/29/15
...
Laughsome coldplay fan
  12/29/15
?
chartreuse cruise ship macaca
  12/29/15
...
Laughsome coldplay fan
  12/29/15
You lug the turkey chili home as you wonder what it would fe...
avocado gas station faggot firefighter
  12/29/15
...
Laughsome coldplay fan
  12/29/15
c for sure
chartreuse cruise ship macaca
  12/29/15
C
fluffy house
  12/29/15
c
Soul-stirring parlour therapy
  12/29/15
Xo
Stirring Transparent Business Firm
  12/29/15
chaturbate
Claret cerebral potus
  12/30/15
C!
Cheese-eating dragon
  12/29/15
NEXT CHAPTER
Cheese-eating dragon
  12/29/15
everyone in this thread unzips.
Arousing Rebellious Senate
  12/29/15
...
Laughsome coldplay fan
  12/29/15
...
Stirring Transparent Business Firm
  12/29/15
Did they turn off Snailmo's electricity?
Soul-stirring parlour therapy
  12/29/15
no, i think he found a job, and a girlfriend
Wonderful french alpha
  12/29/15
lol ouch
free-loading brethren
  12/30/15
he is busy doing tinychat
chartreuse cruise ship macaca
  12/29/15
...
Disgusting piazza turdskin
  12/30/15
...
Laughsome coldplay fan
  12/30/15
Topic has amazing potential.
Big Stain
  12/30/15
You log into chaturbate in order to watch a session of some ...
avocado gas station faggot firefighter
  12/30/15
2
free-loading brethren
  12/30/15
I choose 2, sounds like a great opportunity to bash BOOMER s...
Big Stain
  12/30/15
police
Claret cerebral potus
  12/30/15
1
fluffy house
  12/30/15
lol r u like a genderfuluid snail or sth
Stirring Transparent Business Firm
  12/30/15
...
Stirring Transparent Business Firm
  01/02/16
4 and 180
Soul-stirring parlour therapy
  12/30/15
Wake up and post please.
Soul-stirring parlour therapy
  12/30/15
...
Stirring Transparent Business Firm
  12/30/15
18000000000000000000000000000000000
Outnumbered Dashing Psychic Legal Warrant
  01/11/16
...
cracking henna ratface
  11/05/20
next chapter please!
fuchsia hairraiser parlor
  11/05/20
...
bungulator
  12/13/25
...
passionate anal wagecucks background story
  11/05/20


Poast new message in this thread



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 9:54 PM
Author: avocado gas station faggot firefighter

You don't have any work today because you basically only work two days out of seven at most. Instead, you are at the local grocery store, pondering how to use your EBT card.

Snow falls to the ground outside as you wish you could drink yourself silly, fall into a snow pile, and never wake up. The store has a pungent odor that one naturally associates with inner-city grocery stores.

Everything in the store reminds you that CAPITALISM is bullshit FRAUD AND LIES where proles fucking SCAVENGE to live when faggot parasite bankers and lawyers and eating out to celebrate RAPING this country and everyone in it. Kill all elites by tearing their limbs off with horses and their families too.

Anyways, you only have enough remaining on your EBT to purchase one of the three products on sale:

a) six cans of turkey chili

b) two liters of diet coke

c) a bunch of bananas

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2Reputation#29480960)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 9:56 PM
Author: Cheese-eating dragon

b!

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2Reputation#29480979)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 11:15 PM
Author: Stirring Transparent Business Firm

C

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2Reputation#29481594)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 9:55 PM
Author: Laughsome coldplay fan



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2Reputation#29480970)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 9:56 PM
Author: Honey-headed private investor

c

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2Reputation#29480973)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 9:56 PM
Author: embarrassed to the bone chapel

a

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2Reputation#29480975)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 9:57 PM
Author: fluffy house

a

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2Reputation#29480989)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 10:11 PM
Author: Cheese-eating dragon

Next chapter please

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2Reputation#29481133)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 10:15 PM
Author: avocado gas station faggot firefighter

I can', A & B ar tied :(

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2Reputation#29481164)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 10:20 PM
Author: Laughsome coldplay fan



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2Reputation#29481212)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 10:21 PM
Author: Cheese-eating dragon

Fine I change my vote to A.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2Reputation#29481216)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 10:22 PM
Author: chartreuse cruise ship macaca

a

provides nutrition and wont let you starve

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2Reputation#29481222)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 10:23 PM
Author: Laughsome coldplay fan



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2Reputation#29481225)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 10:30 PM
Author: chartreuse cruise ship macaca

?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2Reputation#29481285)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 10:31 PM
Author: Laughsome coldplay fan



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2Reputation#29481289)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 10:30 PM
Author: avocado gas station faggot firefighter

You lug the turkey chili home as you wonder what it would feel like if you shoved it all up your ass. Your death would be a slightly less humiliating than your actual "life".

Once you get home, you throw it all and start smacking it open with your broken can opener. It's broken because you got it from the Dollar Tree a year ago and you use it all the fucking time because you're too fucking depressed to cook FUCK OBAMA'S AMERICA.

After microwaving it, you douse it in tabasco sauce that you STOLE from Chipotle because LLJL fuck those shitlib faggots, it's so 180 to go at peak hour and just fucking steal sauce. You hope you get arrested one day because at least jail provides life structure.

While eating, you have four tabs open on the computer. None of them are XO. Which do you go on while eating your SHITchili

a) facebook

b) ashemaletv

c) chaturbate

d) drudgereport

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2Reputation#29481288)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 10:31 PM
Author: Laughsome coldplay fan



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2Reputation#29481296)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 10:32 PM
Author: chartreuse cruise ship macaca

c for sure

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2Reputation#29481299)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 10:33 PM
Author: fluffy house

C

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2Reputation#29481311)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 10:56 PM
Author: Soul-stirring parlour therapy

c

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2Reputation#29481436)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 11:16 PM
Author: Stirring Transparent Business Firm

Xo

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2Reputation#29481600)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 30th, 2015 12:58 AM
Author: Claret cerebral potus

chaturbate

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2Reputation#29482189)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 10:31 PM
Author: Cheese-eating dragon

C!

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2Reputation#29481291)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 10:51 PM
Author: Cheese-eating dragon

NEXT CHAPTER

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2Reputation#29481403)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 11:00 PM
Author: Arousing Rebellious Senate

everyone in this thread unzips.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2Reputation#29481469)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 11:15 PM
Author: Laughsome coldplay fan



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2Reputation#29481596)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 11:14 PM
Author: Stirring Transparent Business Firm



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2Reputation#29481589)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 11:33 PM
Author: Soul-stirring parlour therapy

Did they turn off Snailmo's electricity?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2Reputation#29481713)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 11:39 PM
Author: Wonderful french alpha

no, i think he found a job, and a girlfriend

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2Reputation#29481748)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 30th, 2015 12:41 AM
Author: free-loading brethren

lol ouch

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2Reputation#29482097)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 11:47 PM
Author: chartreuse cruise ship macaca

he is busy doing tinychat

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2Reputation#29481804)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 30th, 2015 12:38 AM
Author: Disgusting piazza turdskin



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2Reputation#29482070)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 30th, 2015 12:39 AM
Author: Laughsome coldplay fan



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2Reputation#29482079)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 30th, 2015 12:40 AM
Author: Big Stain

Topic has amazing potential.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2Reputation#29482091)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 30th, 2015 1:01 AM
Author: avocado gas station faggot firefighter

You log into chaturbate in order to watch a session of some dude that you've been following since you found his pictures on a /pol/ thread describing how DEGENERATE transexuals are. JFC shitlibs are really disgusting just trying to shove all of this trans shit down our throat. fuck Obama, we should drag out all media FAGGOTS from their home like that 180000 scene in the Dark Knight Arises where Bane39 takes over Gotham.

You shovel turkey chili in your mouth and you can't help stop thinking about Benzo's asshole and retching, so you put it away for a bit.

Instead, you decide to FURIOUSLY stroke your SPERMWYRM to the long-haired crossdresser on the stream as he seductively WIGGLES his puckered BUTTHOLE.

It is enjoyable and you can see the light at the end of the tunnel, until something horrifying pops out of his shirt. He has BREASTS now. Your wyrm reddens and shrinkens as you realize that he is now identifying as a "she" and has become taking hormones. In disgust, you throw off your Beats!(tm) headphones (they were a gift) and close the window. You zip up your pants angrily as yet another fine day RUINED by libs.

You decide to research more possible career paths that you will never accomplish while you finish your chili. What do you research?

1) Military

2) Police

3) Education

4) Computer Science

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2Reputation#29482203)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 30th, 2015 1:03 AM
Author: free-loading brethren

2

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2Reputation#29482210)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 30th, 2015 1:03 AM
Author: Big Stain

I choose 2, sounds like a great opportunity to bash BOOMER scum.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2Reputation#29482211)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 30th, 2015 1:08 AM
Author: Claret cerebral potus

police

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2Reputation#29482227)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 30th, 2015 1:09 AM
Author: fluffy house

1

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2Reputation#29482232)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 30th, 2015 1:49 AM
Author: Stirring Transparent Business Firm

lol r u like a genderfuluid snail or sth

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2Reputation#29482337)



Reply Favorite

Date: January 2nd, 2016 2:50 PM
Author: Stirring Transparent Business Firm



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2Reputation#29505583)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 30th, 2015 2:02 AM
Author: Soul-stirring parlour therapy

4 and 180

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2Reputation#29482377)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 30th, 2015 11:26 AM
Author: Soul-stirring parlour therapy

Wake up and post please.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2Reputation#29483717)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 30th, 2015 11:10 PM
Author: Stirring Transparent Business Firm



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2Reputation#29488970)



Reply Favorite

Date: January 11th, 2016 10:55 AM
Author: Outnumbered Dashing Psychic Legal Warrant

18000000000000000000000000000000000

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2Reputation#29570485)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 5th, 2020 8:16 AM
Author: cracking henna ratface



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2Reputation#41284039)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 5th, 2020 8:22 AM
Author: fuchsia hairraiser parlor

next chapter please!

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2Reputation#41284068)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 13th, 2025 2:14 AM
Author: bungulator



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2Reputation#49506318)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 5th, 2020 8:34 AM
Author: passionate anal wagecucks background story



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2Reputation#41284137)