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ALMOST hooked up with some college chicks in DC

So I was in the Hagen-Das in Chinatown and there were these ...
Cheese-eating anal whorehouse
  03/21/13
That Burger King is 180. It has a walk-up version of a drive...
henna chad hairy legs
  05/29/15
damn
flushed plaza kitty
  03/21/13
lol you're my favorite poaster, do you know that?
self-absorbed infuriating spot cumskin
  03/21/13
who is it?
Exhilarant fortuitous meteor
  03/21/13
the dood who told some chicks he was the colombian ambassado...
self-absorbed infuriating spot cumskin
  03/21/13
haha, i liked that thread. picking up azns at the ice cream...
Exhilarant fortuitous meteor
  03/21/13
http://xoxohth.com/thread.php?thread_id=2188540&mc=106&a...
Cheese-eating anal whorehouse
  03/21/13
I've also had this adventure recently: http://www.xoxohth...
Cheese-eating anal whorehouse
  03/21/13
180
self-absorbed infuriating spot cumskin
  03/23/13
cliffs? i'm not reading that thesis without pics
electric dark mediation indian lodge
  03/21/13
lol
ebony gas station
  03/21/13
why would you go from Hagan Daas to BK?
walnut digit ratio state
  03/21/13
and then ask the girl to split a shake at BK? lol
Obsidian School Cafeteria Alpha
  03/22/13
I didn't have any ice cream
Cheese-eating anal whorehouse
  03/22/13
And with azn chick guaranteed to be lactose intolerant, no l...
Shimmering tank
  05/29/15
cool story bro
Blue feces
  03/21/13
180
fragrant crackhouse affirmative action
  03/21/13
i love this
vibrant trailer park factory reset button
  03/21/13
...
Cheese-eating anal whorehouse
  03/21/13
...
Cheese-eating anal whorehouse
  03/21/13
TLDR
duck-like buff indirect expression
  03/21/13
...
Flesh mad cow disease police squad
  03/21/13
179
maize pungent friendly grandma deer antler
  03/21/13
180
swollen effete queen of the night native
  03/21/13
You went to BK and you only got one sandwich? Weak sauce
racy ceo resort
  03/22/13
what is the CREDITED order when taking a girl to BK?
Cheese-eating anal whorehouse
  03/22/13
...
Cheese-eating anal whorehouse
  03/23/13
still waiting for an answer here...
Cheese-eating anal whorehouse
  03/23/13
180
mind-boggling mother
  03/23/13
178. Keep up the good work.
aphrodisiac brunch masturbator
  03/23/13
...
Khaki site
  05/29/15
ty for this bump and also your moniker
Glassy Keepsake Machete
  05/29/15
...
aromatic cobalt foreskin
  05/29/15
...
pink home
  07/08/15
this is as good as it gets for an xo poster
Salmon Thriller International Law Enforcement Agency Library
  07/08/15
LOL
passionate reading party
  07/08/15
180
judgmental kitchen
  07/08/15
lol
Supple fuchsia really tough guy
  07/08/15
Oh brother. You should have exchanged numbers in Hagen Daas ...
Disgusting mildly autistic casino fat ankles
  07/08/15
...
Lemon jew death wish
  11/22/17
...
Lake principal's office
  11/22/17
Dodged a bullet bro ud be cnn headline rn
Gold Chapel
  11/22/17
...
vibrant trailer park factory reset button
  11/22/17
great thread
Sienna juggernaut
  11/23/17


Poast new message in this thread



Reply Favorite

Date: March 21st, 2013 7:50 PM
Author: Cheese-eating anal whorehouse

So I was in the Hagen-Das in Chinatown and there were these two asian girls at a table, sharing a small cup of some kind of fruit sherbert. They were talking about whether any federal agencies in DC were worth interning at. They shit on half the federal government for being "not interesting enough", and then they started talking about the Commodity Futures Trading Commission, the CFTC.

That was my cue. I slid over, and said "I couldn't help but overhear that you're talking about the CFTC. I work there!"

Now, I don't really work at the CFTC. I do doc review that rarely touches upon futures trading. But when I was at law school at GW, some guy from the CFTC spoke there, and I attended for the free pizza.

"Yeah, the CFTC is leading the way in moving towards principles based regulation in the American market" I said, this being the only thing I remembered from the talk. But it was all I needed: they were hooked as I started talking about the differences between American and European regulatory regimes, which I knew from a useless international law class I took a few years back.

Now these Asian girls, they turned out to be UVA econ majors on their spring break. One of them was really small and tiny, maybe 5'2, probably around a hundred pounds. The second one was taller and thicker: she was maybe 20 pounds overweight and was as close to having T&A as an Asian girl can.

Neither was over 21, and they were complaining that they couldn't hang out anywhere in Chinatown except the Hagen-Das. That's when I told them that I knew a place we could hang out where they wouldn't check ID. I offered to take them there, and they took the opportunity to say yes.

I walked with them for a few blocks, I kept feeding them bullshit about futures trading and peppered my speech with buzzwords like big data, six sigma, and the like. I told them that I went to law school at Penn (figured econ types would find it prestigious due to Wharton), but now worked as a special assistant to the Chairman of the CFTC. Fuck if I know if the CFTC even has a chairman (a lot of agencies like that have a governor or a comissioner, or like a panel of people) but they didn't call me out on it.

Things were going well, until they realized that I was taking them to the Burger King by Judiciary Square. They both laughed, but the smaller one said she had to go and left. The larger one stayed with me, and we went inside. I had a double whopper with cheese, she had a regular whopper with cheese, and we sat down to eat. She talked about how she didn't get into TJ for high school, choosing UVA over several private schools to save money, and her grad school plans.

Thinking now was my shot, I asked if she wanted to split a shake. Awkward silence followed, and then she said that she would have liked to, but really needed to go. I asked for a number, and she said she didn't have it memorized, but would text me if I gave her mine.

It's been over a week and I haven't gotten a text. Ah well.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2211158&forum_id=2#22858681)



Reply Favorite

Date: May 29th, 2015 10:28 PM
Author: henna chad hairy legs

That Burger King is 180. It has a walk-up version of a drive thru window on the sidewalk

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2211158&forum_id=2#27994440)



Reply Favorite

Date: March 21st, 2013 7:51 PM
Author: flushed plaza kitty

damn

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2211158&forum_id=2#22858694)



Reply Favorite

Date: March 21st, 2013 7:52 PM
Author: self-absorbed infuriating spot cumskin

lol you're my favorite poaster, do you know that?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2211158&forum_id=2#22858701)



Reply Favorite

Date: March 21st, 2013 7:53 PM
Author: Exhilarant fortuitous meteor

who is it?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2211158&forum_id=2#22858714)



Reply Favorite

Date: March 21st, 2013 7:54 PM
Author: self-absorbed infuriating spot cumskin

the dood who told some chicks he was the colombian ambassador's son. i'd find a link but i don't remember the title.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2211158&forum_id=2#22858720)



Reply Favorite

Date: March 21st, 2013 7:55 PM
Author: Exhilarant fortuitous meteor

haha, i liked that thread. picking up azns at the ice cream store is really hard.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2211158&forum_id=2#22858726)



Reply Favorite

Date: March 21st, 2013 7:55 PM
Author: Cheese-eating anal whorehouse

http://xoxohth.com/thread.php?thread_id=2188540&mc=106&forum_id=2

haven't run this schtick in a few weeks. might do bolivia next, I think chicks might find a leftist nation sexier

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2211158&forum_id=2#22858728)



Reply Favorite

Date: March 21st, 2013 8:01 PM
Author: Cheese-eating anal whorehouse

I've also had this adventure recently:

http://www.xoxohth.com/thread.php?thread_id=2205603&mc=3&forum_id=2

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2211158&forum_id=2#22858774)



Reply Favorite

Date: March 23rd, 2013 2:34 PM
Author: self-absorbed infuriating spot cumskin

180

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2211158&forum_id=2#22867434)



Reply Favorite

Date: March 21st, 2013 7:52 PM
Author: electric dark mediation indian lodge

cliffs?

i'm not reading that thesis without pics

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2211158&forum_id=2#22858708)



Reply Favorite

Date: March 21st, 2013 7:52 PM
Author: ebony gas station

lol

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2211158&forum_id=2#22858709)



Reply Favorite

Date: March 21st, 2013 7:53 PM
Author: walnut digit ratio state

why would you go from Hagan Daas to BK?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2211158&forum_id=2#22858713)



Reply Favorite

Date: March 22nd, 2013 7:54 PM
Author: Obsidian School Cafeteria Alpha

and then ask the girl to split a shake at BK? lol

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2211158&forum_id=2#22863708)



Reply Favorite

Date: March 22nd, 2013 9:57 PM
Author: Cheese-eating anal whorehouse

I didn't have any ice cream

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2211158&forum_id=2#22864431)



Reply Favorite

Date: May 29th, 2015 10:31 PM
Author: Shimmering tank

And with azn chick guaranteed to be lactose intolerant, no less!

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2211158&forum_id=2#27994473)



Reply Favorite

Date: March 21st, 2013 7:55 PM
Author: Blue feces

cool story bro

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2211158&forum_id=2#22858724)



Reply Favorite

Date: March 21st, 2013 7:56 PM
Author: fragrant crackhouse affirmative action

180

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2211158&forum_id=2#22858735)



Reply Favorite

Date: March 21st, 2013 8:01 PM
Author: vibrant trailer park factory reset button

i love this

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2211158&forum_id=2#22858777)



Reply Favorite

Date: March 21st, 2013 8:07 PM
Author: Cheese-eating anal whorehouse



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2211158&forum_id=2#22858838)



Reply Favorite

Date: March 21st, 2013 11:07 PM
Author: Cheese-eating anal whorehouse



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2211158&forum_id=2#22859826)



Reply Favorite

Date: March 21st, 2013 11:24 PM
Author: duck-like buff indirect expression

TLDR

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2211158&forum_id=2#22859944)



Reply Favorite

Date: March 21st, 2013 11:31 PM
Author: Flesh mad cow disease police squad



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2211158&forum_id=2#22860007)



Reply Favorite

Date: March 21st, 2013 11:36 PM
Author: maize pungent friendly grandma deer antler

179

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2211158&forum_id=2#22860031)



Reply Favorite

Date: March 21st, 2013 11:46 PM
Author: swollen effete queen of the night native

180

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2211158&forum_id=2#22860089)



Reply Favorite

Date: March 22nd, 2013 12:41 AM
Author: racy ceo resort

You went to BK and you only got one sandwich? Weak sauce

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2211158&forum_id=2#22860477)



Reply Favorite

Date: March 22nd, 2013 7:51 PM
Author: Cheese-eating anal whorehouse

what is the CREDITED order when taking a girl to BK?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2211158&forum_id=2#22863697)



Reply Favorite

Date: March 23rd, 2013 2:21 PM
Author: Cheese-eating anal whorehouse



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2211158&forum_id=2#22867365)



Reply Favorite

Date: March 23rd, 2013 3:28 PM
Author: Cheese-eating anal whorehouse

still waiting for an answer here...

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2211158&forum_id=2#22867761)



Reply Favorite

Date: March 23rd, 2013 2:23 PM
Author: mind-boggling mother

180

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2211158&forum_id=2#22867381)



Reply Favorite

Date: March 23rd, 2013 2:32 PM
Author: aphrodisiac brunch masturbator

178. Keep up the good work.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2211158&forum_id=2#22867426)



Reply Favorite

Date: May 29th, 2015 10:12 PM
Author: Khaki site



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2211158&forum_id=2#27994230)



Reply Favorite

Date: May 29th, 2015 10:16 PM
Author: Glassy Keepsake Machete

ty for this bump and also your moniker

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2211158&forum_id=2#27994270)



Reply Favorite

Date: May 29th, 2015 10:30 PM
Author: aromatic cobalt foreskin



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2211158&forum_id=2#27994460)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 8th, 2015 2:00 AM
Author: pink home



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2211158&forum_id=2#28280899)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 8th, 2015 2:38 AM
Author: Salmon Thriller International Law Enforcement Agency Library

this is as good as it gets for an xo poster

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2211158&forum_id=2#28281015)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 8th, 2015 5:47 AM
Author: passionate reading party

LOL

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2211158&forum_id=2#28281258)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 8th, 2015 5:51 AM
Author: judgmental kitchen

180

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2211158&forum_id=2#28281261)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 8th, 2015 5:55 AM
Author: Supple fuchsia really tough guy

lol

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2211158&forum_id=2#28281262)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 8th, 2015 6:11 AM
Author: Disgusting mildly autistic casino fat ankles

Oh brother. You should have exchanged numbers in Hagen Daas under the excuse that you'd reach out to them about career prospects at the govt. then leave. Another day text the girl to invite to discuss work over beers. At drinks touch on work then immediately shift to other topics, which transforms it into a date. Then follow up and say you really enjoyed and invite her out to dinner.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2211158&forum_id=2#28281265)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 22nd, 2017 11:30 PM
Author: Lemon jew death wish



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2211158&forum_id=2#34753637)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 22nd, 2017 11:36 PM
Author: Lake principal's office



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2211158&forum_id=2#34753668)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 22nd, 2017 11:38 PM
Author: Gold Chapel

Dodged a bullet bro ud be cnn headline rn

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2211158&forum_id=2#34753685)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 22nd, 2017 11:42 PM
Author: vibrant trailer park factory reset button



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2211158&forum_id=2#34753726)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 23rd, 2017 12:10 AM
Author: Sienna juggernaut

great thread

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2211158&forum_id=2#34753885)