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In This Thread we xoxo-ify the Truths about Chuck Norris

Chuck Norris has won the "Last Person to Post in this T...
Overrated mauve puppy
  12/16/05
Chuck Norris killed Elvis Grbac with a roundhouse kick to th...
lavender embarrassed to the bone den
  12/16/05
pwn3d
Metal trailer park
  12/16/05
vin3d
hairraiser institution pozpig
  12/16/05
Chuck Norris attended NU for undergrad, has appeared in Play...
Impertinent rigpig stain
  12/16/05
is it true that Chuck Norris used to post here?
lavender embarrassed to the bone den
  12/16/05
180^180
Fragrant gas station
  12/16/05
Oh god, I laughed so loudly, my kitten ran into another room...
Adventurous resort
  12/16/05
Yes.
beady-eyed ticket booth sweet tailpipe
  12/30/05
There are no T's in Chuck Norris's name, thus making it impo...
Misunderstood Avocado Stead Boistinker
  12/16/05
Chuck Norris got a 174 on the LSAT simply by writing TITCR
Concupiscible national wagecucks
  12/16/05
With a quill pen.
burgundy dead brunch digit ratio
  12/16/05
hi-larious
Fantasy-prone stirring pocket flask hall
  12/16/05
Chuck Norris can't get laid.
sienna cruel-hearted athletic conference
  12/16/05
This one fails to be funny.
hairraiser institution pozpig
  12/16/05
Chuck Norris, Antonin Scalia Endowed Professor of Space Law,...
chocolate whorehouse
  12/16/05
When a URM asked about his chances at HYS with a 3.3/165, Ch...
naked ratface
  12/16/05
booooo
Fantasy-prone stirring pocket flask hall
  12/16/05
If Chuck Norris were really a XOXO poster, you know he would...
naked ratface
  12/16/05
lol
hairless marvelous tattoo
  12/16/05
...
hairless marvelous tattoo
  12/16/05
I personally don't have a problem with AA, as I've pointed o...
naked ratface
  12/16/05
but, it isn't in the spirit of the chuck. i know, as i watc...
Fantasy-prone stirring pocket flask hall
  12/16/05
I feel sorry for you.
Vivacious shaky goyim center
  12/16/05
Dude! I, too, did this with my grandmother. Awesome!
Adventurous resort
  12/16/05
Chuck Norris doesn't apply for law school, law schools apply...
hairless marvelous tattoo
  12/16/05
Chuck Norris often takes the LSAT to clear his sinuses, coin...
hairless marvelous tattoo
  12/16/05
The highest score you can get on the LSAT, in fact, is "...
naked ratface
  12/16/05
but only Chuck Norris can get that
hairless marvelous tattoo
  12/16/05
Chuck Norris once PWN3d Tubgirl by Lemonpartying her
hairless marvelous tattoo
  12/16/05
You are just two subpoenas away from death by roundhouse kic...
Mint foreskin
  12/16/05
Beautiful. We need more Chuck/LeiTTTer comparisons.
naked ratface
  12/16/05
I was going to say that Chuck Norris is so powerful, you nee...
house-broken mad-dog skullcap mental disorder
  02/05/06
ChuckNorislikesporkchopsbecausetheyareshapedlikeAfrica
Mahogany Parlor Dysfunction
  12/16/05
chucknorrislikesporkchopsbecausetheyareshapedliketexas
very tactful stage
  12/30/05
Any conservatives want to smoke this with Chuck and Andots?
walnut stimulating love of her life generalized bond
  12/16/05
HYSCCN = Harvard Yale Stanford Columbia Chuck Nor...
ebony alpha house
  12/16/05
Oh, this one was *good*.
naked ratface
  12/16/05
"chuck fucking norris"
bearded bat shit crazy heaven
  02/05/06
On his birthday, Vin Diesel randomly selects one lucky gunne...
hairraiser institution pozpig
  12/16/05
Once a poster stated a truth about Vin Diesel in a Chuck Nor...
hairraiser institution pozpig
  12/16/05
Chuck Norris is best in Asia.
doobsian purple nursing home
  12/16/05
Chuck Norris invented Ambition, and regularly engages in tou...
talented peach halford
  12/16/05
You mean that internationally-known invented card game??? In...
doobsian purple nursing home
  12/16/05
Chuck Norris. Chuck Norris. Chuck Norris. Chuck Norris. ...
Mahogany Parlor Dysfunction
  12/16/05
If you post "Chuck Norris" five times, he will app...
hairraiser institution pozpig
  12/16/05
A. A. A. A. A.
Buck-toothed round eye
  12/16/05
well played.
vigorous elite codepig
  12/16/05
When law professors deliver their final words on the last cl...
dashing milky trust fund
  12/16/05
A few years ago, while browsing around the library downtown,...
Rose philosopher-king set
  12/16/05
underappreciated post.
Snowy cocky dingle berry
  09/16/06
Chuck Norris is the patented creator of Meatspin and receive...
Bateful seedy forum
  12/16/05
The "\" at the top is actually a scar left over fr...
Overrated mauve puppy
  12/16/05
Cravath wasn't even a V100 firm until three years ago when C...
vigorous elite codepig
  12/16/05
What is Chuck Norris? Chuck Norris is a wonderful Japanese ...
Irradiated Bipolar International Law Enforcement Agency Idea He Suggested
  12/16/05
Chuck Norris stared the classic refrigerator, hls cool doods...
razzle-dazzle amber church building
  12/16/05
I was at McDonalds, and talking with some friends and stuff....
talented peach halford
  12/16/05
Chuck Norris is so virile that he vomits semen, hence the sp...
territorial aromatic home scourge upon the earth
  12/16/05
Chuck Norris to Stabby: DING! Fag!
Buck-toothed round eye
  12/16/05
180
Metal trailer park
  12/16/05
TITCR. This is THE Chuck (Norris) Response.
doobsian purple nursing home
  12/16/05
in this thread we CHUCK NORRIS
beady-eyed ticket booth sweet tailpipe
  12/16/05
Just farted. Office smells like Chuck Norris.
Buck-toothed round eye
  12/16/05
chucknorrislikesporkchopsbecausetheyareshapedlikearoundhouse...
beady-eyed ticket booth sweet tailpipe
  12/16/05
Once four Michigan 1Ls known as "The Crew" picked ...
naked ratface
  12/16/05
All pleadings in federal court against Chuck Norris involve ...
Misunderstood Avocado Stead Boistinker
  12/16/05
UT dropped to tier 4 status when Chuck Norris became aware o...
beady-eyed ticket booth sweet tailpipe
  12/16/05
In this thread we talk like Chuck Norris roundhouse kicking ...
Impertinent rigpig stain
  12/16/05
Chuck Norris is so prestigious his name is both the C and th...
arrogant native
  12/16/05
120. It's been done (see above).
naked ratface
  12/16/05
Damn I suck.
arrogant native
  12/16/05
Long ago, when an inferior poster tried to make a point, Chu...
pearl violent psychic mood
  12/16/05
awesome
Overrated mauve puppy
  12/16/05
completely awesome
Bateful seedy forum
  12/17/05
Cool Guys with Cool Haircuts in Delta Force
Metal trailer park
  12/16/05
Walker, TTTexas Ranger
Metal trailer park
  12/16/05
Egg's RoboCop art was actually Chuck Norris in a RoboCop cos...
Overrated mauve puppy
  12/16/05
Chuck Norris has never had amazing sex with someone NOT his ...
Internet-worthy faggotry parlour
  12/16/05
Then wouldn't he always have amazing sex with somebody who i...
beady-eyed ticket booth sweet tailpipe
  12/16/05
Excellent point, there would be no need to specify if the se...
Internet-worthy faggotry parlour
  12/16/05
A gell-headed Chuck Norris crushed Evan-2001/Dan's face usin...
naked ratface
  12/16/05
Chuck Norris RIPPED OFF HIS NUTS I dont think of myself a...
Overrated mauve puppy
  12/16/05
Bill McHenry was actually nullo'ed when Chuck Norris flipped...
beady-eyed ticket booth sweet tailpipe
  12/16/05
Chuck Norris won the "XOXO Smut writing contest" s...
Overrated mauve puppy
  12/16/05
This made me laugh out loud at the office when I was trying ...
razzle-dazzle amber church building
  12/16/05
Chuck Norris City WAS built in a day by Chuck Norris before ...
Dun Gunner
  12/17/05
I just read about Chuck Norris in US Weekly. Those guys at ...
Bateful seedy forum
  12/30/05
The guy sitting next to me drew Chuck Norris on his torts ex...
Flushed School
  12/30/05
haha!
Nighttime main people rigor
  02/05/06
Robocop is curator of the Museum of Modern Chuck Norris Art.
very tactful stage
  12/30/05
Chuck Norris is more prestigious than Biglaw
Histrionic pink jew candlestick maker
  12/30/05
Chuck Norris won the "Would Anyone raise kids in a city...
Overrated mauve puppy
  12/30/05
chuck norris once hate fucked jill
Overrated mauve puppy
  01/04/06
Chuck Norris notified Haley Jo Osmond, at the time a 6 year ...
thriller locale
  01/04/06
Chuck Norris has a room in which he mounts the heads of Femi...
hairraiser institution pozpig
  01/04/06
http://www.jeffandwillandchucknorris.com/
massive spruce orchestra pit pisswyrm
  01/04/06
Chuck Norris gave Madame Cunt AIDS without giving her HIV. ...
Overrated mauve puppy
  02/05/06
178
Odious Flickering Filthpig
  02/05/06
Chuck Norris can kill people with his mind and then resurrec...
Contagious kitchen milk
  02/05/06
Hey Chuck Norris, Poetic Dreamer wants his virginity back
Bearded telephone indirect expression
  02/05/06
Non-Chuck Norris threads bump themselves so that they may be...
Floppy Liquid Oxygen
  02/05/06
Chuck Norris got in everywhere he applied!
yellow soul-stirring abode selfie
  02/05/06
chuck norris came here and told me a bunch of funy jokes!!!1...
Nighttime main people rigor
  02/05/06
Chuck Norris' roundhouse kicks are both shrewd and decadent.
infuriating kitty cat
  02/05/06
Chuck Norris can fart naked all he wants and never get diarr...
Contagious kitchen milk
  02/05/06
Chuck Norris jokes never get old
Buck-toothed round eye
  10/08/06
chuck norris discovered that FAGGOT FIREFIGHTERS caused all ...
Sapphire electric pistol weed whacker
  10/08/06
is an old useless fuck who was Bruce Lee's bitch and was nev...
deep trip regret theater
  10/08/06


Poast new message in this thread





Date: December 16th, 2005 8:41 AM
Author: Overrated mauve puppy

Chuck Norris has won the "Last Person to Post in this Thread Wins"

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=320941&forum_id=2#4577521)





Date: December 16th, 2005 8:45 AM
Author: lavender embarrassed to the bone den

Chuck Norris killed Elvis Grbac with a roundhouse kick to the face.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=320941&forum_id=2#4577525)





Date: December 16th, 2005 6:32 PM
Author: Metal trailer park

pwn3d

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=320941&forum_id=2#4582393)





Date: December 16th, 2005 6:37 PM
Author: hairraiser institution pozpig

vin3d

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=320941&forum_id=2#4582434)





Date: December 16th, 2005 8:48 AM
Author: Impertinent rigpig stain

Chuck Norris attended NU for undergrad, has appeared in Playboy, was accepted to UT for med school, has a flourishing modeling career, and dates an investment banker.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=320941&forum_id=2#4577529)





Date: December 16th, 2005 8:49 AM
Author: lavender embarrassed to the bone den

is it true that Chuck Norris used to post here?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=320941&forum_id=2#4577530)





Date: December 16th, 2005 12:21 PM
Author: Fragrant gas station

180^180

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=320941&forum_id=2#4578647)





Date: December 16th, 2005 7:04 PM
Author: Adventurous resort

Oh god, I laughed so loudly, my kitten ran into another room.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=320941&forum_id=2#4582695)





Date: December 30th, 2005 2:35 PM
Author: beady-eyed ticket booth sweet tailpipe

Yes.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=320941&forum_id=2#4696035)





Date: December 16th, 2005 5:13 PM
Author: Misunderstood Avocado Stead Boistinker

There are no T's in Chuck Norris's name, thus making it impossible to idenTTTify him as a TTT.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=320941&forum_id=2#4581734)





Date: December 16th, 2005 8:46 AM
Author: Concupiscible national wagecucks

Chuck Norris got a 174 on the LSAT simply by writing TITCR

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=320941&forum_id=2#4577526)





Date: December 16th, 2005 8:49 AM
Author: burgundy dead brunch digit ratio

With a quill pen.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=320941&forum_id=2#4577531)





Date: December 16th, 2005 11:10 AM
Author: Fantasy-prone stirring pocket flask hall

hi-larious

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=320941&forum_id=2#4577979)





Date: December 16th, 2005 8:55 AM
Author: sienna cruel-hearted athletic conference

Chuck Norris can't get laid.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=320941&forum_id=2#4577535)





Date: December 16th, 2005 11:52 AM
Author: hairraiser institution pozpig

This one fails to be funny.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=320941&forum_id=2#4578401)





Date: December 16th, 2005 9:01 AM
Author: chocolate whorehouse

Chuck Norris, Antonin Scalia Endowed Professor of Space Law, Princeton School of Law

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=320941&forum_id=2#4577539)





Date: December 16th, 2005 11:09 AM
Author: naked ratface

When a URM asked about his chances at HYS with a 3.3/165, Chuck Norris killed him with a roundhouse kick to the face and said "HTFH"

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=320941&forum_id=2#4577976)





Date: December 16th, 2005 11:09 AM
Author: Fantasy-prone stirring pocket flask hall

booooo

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=320941&forum_id=2#4577978)





Date: December 16th, 2005 11:10 AM
Author: naked ratface

If Chuck Norris were really a XOXO poster, you know he would be doing this *all the time*.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=320941&forum_id=2#4577983)





Date: December 16th, 2005 11:10 AM
Author: hairless marvelous tattoo

lol

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=320941&forum_id=2#4577981)





Date: December 16th, 2005 11:10 AM
Author: hairless marvelous tattoo



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=320941&forum_id=2#4577984)





Date: December 16th, 2005 11:11 AM
Author: naked ratface

I personally don't have a problem with AA, as I've pointed out many times elsewhere. But this is a XOXO-ification of Chuck. Hence you know it would happen, since 90% of the rest of XOXO has their panties in a bunch about it.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=320941&forum_id=2#4577993)





Date: December 16th, 2005 11:12 AM
Author: Fantasy-prone stirring pocket flask hall

but, it isn't in the spirit of the chuck. i know, as i watched walker, texas ranger for years alongside my grandmother. we also watched dr. quinn, medicine woman.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=320941&forum_id=2#4578003)





Date: December 16th, 2005 12:24 PM
Author: Vivacious shaky goyim center

I feel sorry for you.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=320941&forum_id=2#4578668)





Date: December 16th, 2005 7:04 PM
Author: Adventurous resort

Dude! I, too, did this with my grandmother. Awesome!

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=320941&forum_id=2#4582701)





Date: December 16th, 2005 11:11 AM
Author: hairless marvelous tattoo

Chuck Norris doesn't apply for law school, law schools apply for him

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=320941&forum_id=2#4577988)





Date: December 16th, 2005 11:15 AM
Author: hairless marvelous tattoo

Chuck Norris often takes the LSAT to clear his sinuses, coincidentally, those were the very times that Robin Singh missed getting a 180

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=320941&forum_id=2#4578018)





Date: December 16th, 2005 11:20 AM
Author: naked ratface

The highest score you can get on the LSAT, in fact, is "Chuck Norris."

A "Chuck Norris" = Yale auto-admit.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=320941&forum_id=2#4578055)





Date: December 16th, 2005 11:21 AM
Author: hairless marvelous tattoo

but only Chuck Norris can get that

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=320941&forum_id=2#4578061)





Date: December 16th, 2005 11:16 AM
Author: hairless marvelous tattoo

Chuck Norris once PWN3d Tubgirl by Lemonpartying her

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=320941&forum_id=2#4578029)





Date: December 16th, 2005 11:31 AM
Author: Mint foreskin

You are just two subpoenas away from death by roundhouse kick.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=320941&forum_id=2#4578204)





Date: December 16th, 2005 6:13 PM
Author: naked ratface

Beautiful. We need more Chuck/LeiTTTer comparisons.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=320941&forum_id=2#4582237)





Date: February 5th, 2006 5:33 PM
Author: house-broken mad-dog skullcap mental disorder

I was going to say that Chuck Norris is so powerful, you need a third subpoena to get to him.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=320941&forum_id=2#5003037)





Date: December 16th, 2005 11:52 AM
Author: Mahogany Parlor Dysfunction

ChuckNorislikesporkchopsbecausetheyareshapedlikeAfrica

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=320941&forum_id=2#4578402)





Date: December 30th, 2005 1:13 PM
Author: very tactful stage

chucknorrislikesporkchopsbecausetheyareshapedliketexas

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=320941&forum_id=2#4695567)





Date: December 16th, 2005 11:58 AM
Author: walnut stimulating love of her life generalized bond

Any conservatives want to smoke this with Chuck and Andots?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=320941&forum_id=2#4578434)





Date: December 16th, 2005 11:59 AM
Author: ebony alpha house

HYSCCN =

Harvard

Yale

Stanford

Columbia

Chuck

Norris

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=320941&forum_id=2#4578441)





Date: December 16th, 2005 12:23 PM
Author: naked ratface

Oh, this one was *good*.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=320941&forum_id=2#4578659)





Date: February 5th, 2006 5:10 PM
Author: bearded bat shit crazy heaven

"chuck fucking norris"

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=320941&forum_id=2#5002837)





Date: December 16th, 2005 12:00 PM
Author: hairraiser institution pozpig

On his birthday, Vin Diesel randomly selects one lucky gunner to be thrown into the sun.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=320941&forum_id=2#4578451)





Date: December 16th, 2005 12:04 PM
Author: hairraiser institution pozpig

Once a poster stated a truth about Vin Diesel in a Chuck Norris thread. He was found brutally injured ten minutes later in the law library stacks, and died in the ambulance of roundhouse-kick-related injuries.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=320941&forum_id=2#4578475)





Date: December 16th, 2005 12:00 PM
Author: doobsian purple nursing home

Chuck Norris is best in Asia.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=320941&forum_id=2#4578454)





Date: December 16th, 2005 12:01 PM
Author: talented peach halford

Chuck Norris invented Ambition, and regularly engages in tournaments with Renada Deshada and 174.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=320941&forum_id=2#4578457)





Date: December 16th, 2005 12:02 PM
Author: doobsian purple nursing home

You mean that internationally-known invented card game??? Invented in Brussels by a student from Carleton?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=320941&forum_id=2#4578464)





Date: December 16th, 2005 12:01 PM
Author: Mahogany Parlor Dysfunction

Chuck Norris.

Chuck Norris.

Chuck Norris.

Chuck Norris.

Chuck Norris.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=320941&forum_id=2#4578462)





Date: December 16th, 2005 12:05 PM
Author: hairraiser institution pozpig

If you post "Chuck Norris" five times, he will appear and kill your entire family... but at least you get to see Chuck Norris.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=320941&forum_id=2#4578483)





Date: December 16th, 2005 5:42 PM
Author: Buck-toothed round eye

A.

A.

A.

A.

A.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=320941&forum_id=2#4581977)





Date: December 16th, 2005 5:50 PM
Author: vigorous elite codepig

well played.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=320941&forum_id=2#4582054)





Date: December 16th, 2005 12:05 PM
Author: dashing milky trust fund

When law professors deliver their final words on the last class, the students begin a slow clap . . . . for Chuck Norris.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=320941&forum_id=2#4578481)





Date: December 16th, 2005 12:16 PM
Author: Rose philosopher-king set

A few years ago, while browsing around the library downtown, I had to take a piss. As I entered the john a big beautiful all-american football hero type, Chuck Norris, came out of one of the booths. I stood at the urinal looking at him out of the corner of my eye as he washed his hands. He didn't once look at me. He was "straight" and married -- and in any case I was sure I wouldn't have a chance with him. As soon as he left I darted into the booth he'd vacated, hoping there might be a lingering smell of shit and even a seat still warm from his sturdy young ass. I found not only the smell but the shit itself. He'd forgotten to flush. And what a treasure he had left behind. Three or four beautiful specimens floated in the bowl. It apparently had been a fairly dry, constipated shit, for all were fat, stiff, and ruggedly textured. The real prize was a great feast of turd -- a nine inch gastrointestinal triumph as thick as a man's wrist. I knelt before the bowl, inhaling the rich brown fragrance and wondered if I should obey the impulse building up inside me. I'd always been a heavy rimmer and had lapped up more than one little clump of shit, but that had been just an inevitable part of eating ass and not an end in itself. Of course I'd had jerk-off fantasies of devouring great loads of it (what rimmer hasn't), but I had never done it. Now, here I was, confronted with the most beautiful five-pound turd I'd ever feasted my eyes on, a sausage fit to star in any fantasy and one I knew to have been hatched from the asshole of the world's handsomest young stud. Why not? I plucked it from the bowl, holding it with both hands to keep it from breaking. I lifted it to my nose. It smelled like rich, ripe limburger (horrid, but thrilling), yet had the consistency of cheddar. What is cheese anyway but milk turning to shit without the benefit of a digestive tract? I gave it a lick and MY HEAD IMMEDIATELY EXPLODED FROM THE POWER OF CHUCK NORRIS FECES.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=320941&forum_id=2#4578582)





Date: September 16th, 2006 3:53 AM
Author: Snowy cocky dingle berry

underappreciated post.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=320941&forum_id=2#6622978)





Date: December 16th, 2005 12:21 PM
Author: Bateful seedy forum

Chuck Norris is the patented creator of Meatspin and receives royalties each time you click on the link. All proceeds go to fight double aids in subsaharan africa. won't you do your part? www.meatspin.com

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=320941&forum_id=2#4578642)





Date: December 16th, 2005 1:48 PM
Author: Overrated mauve puppy

The "\" at the top is actually a scar left over from when Chuck Norris roundhoused his computer

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=320941&forum_id=2#4579432)





Date: December 16th, 2005 5:27 PM
Author: vigorous elite codepig

Cravath wasn't even a V100 firm until three years ago when Chuck Norris became the hiring partner.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=320941&forum_id=2#4581844)





Date: December 16th, 2005 5:34 PM
Author: Irradiated Bipolar International Law Enforcement Agency Idea He Suggested

What is Chuck Norris? Chuck Norris is a wonderful Japanese artform...

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=320941&forum_id=2#4581897)





Date: December 16th, 2005 5:36 PM
Author: razzle-dazzle amber church building

Chuck Norris stared the classic refrigerator, hls cool doods with haircuts, all the rate this chick threads, farted and office smells like an asshole, and more imporantly the chuck norris threads that make you laugh.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=320941&forum_id=2#4581916)





Date: December 16th, 2005 5:36 PM
Author: talented peach halford

I was at McDonalds, and talking with some friends and stuff. There was this guy sitting in the corner all by himself. He looked sort of depressed. I didn't really think about it until later though. He finished his food before us and walked out. Like, 30 seconds later, we hear these brakes screeching and we were like 'WTF, was that a car accident?' and we all stand up and look out the window. It was that kid. I guess he jumped in front of a car or something. He was just lying on the ground. I couldn't tell if he was alive or not. It was crazy. This lady standing in line started screaming and stuff. We didn't go out there, but we watched until the ambulance came. It was really sad when his mom showed up though. They had to sort of shovel him onto the stretcher, and as they were putting him into the ambulance, Chuck Norris came, gave the guy CPR, and kicked the shit out of the driver of the car.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=320941&forum_id=2#4581924)





Date: December 16th, 2005 5:41 PM
Author: territorial aromatic home scourge upon the earth

Chuck Norris is so virile that he vomits semen, hence the spunk on rasquach's floppy tits.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=320941&forum_id=2#4581966)





Date: December 16th, 2005 5:42 PM
Author: Buck-toothed round eye

Chuck Norris to Stabby: DING! Fag!

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=320941&forum_id=2#4581987)





Date: December 16th, 2005 6:33 PM
Author: Metal trailer park

180

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=320941&forum_id=2#4582402)





Date: December 16th, 2005 5:59 PM
Author: doobsian purple nursing home

TITCR. This is THE Chuck (Norris) Response.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=320941&forum_id=2#4582109)





Date: December 16th, 2005 6:01 PM
Author: beady-eyed ticket booth sweet tailpipe

in this thread we CHUCK NORRIS

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=320941&forum_id=2#4582124)





Date: December 16th, 2005 6:02 PM
Author: Buck-toothed round eye

Just farted. Office smells like Chuck Norris.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=320941&forum_id=2#4582136)





Date: December 16th, 2005 6:04 PM
Author: beady-eyed ticket booth sweet tailpipe

chucknorrislikesporkchopsbecausetheyareshapedlikearoundhousedhead

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=320941&forum_id=2#4582145)





Date: December 16th, 2005 6:11 PM
Author: naked ratface

Once four Michigan 1Ls known as "The Crew" picked a fight with Chuck Norris because they mistook him for a drunken fratboy.

Chuck Norris caved two of their heads in using only his chin, while the other two stood by and watched. Then he killed those two with roundhouse kicks to the face.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=320941&forum_id=2#4582210)





Date: December 16th, 2005 6:11 PM
Author: Misunderstood Avocado Stead Boistinker

All pleadings in federal court against Chuck Norris involve Rule 9(g).

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=320941&forum_id=2#4582216)





Date: December 16th, 2005 6:15 PM
Author: beady-eyed ticket booth sweet tailpipe

UT dropped to tier 4 status when Chuck Norris became aware of Leiter's ranking methodology.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=320941&forum_id=2#4582255)





Date: December 16th, 2005 6:19 PM
Author: Impertinent rigpig stain

In this thread we talk like Chuck Norris roundhouse kicking the life out of B-FF

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=320941&forum_id=2#4582280)





Date: December 16th, 2005 6:23 PM
Author: arrogant native

Chuck Norris is so prestigious his name is both the C and the N in the very coveted CNN of the T-14.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=320941&forum_id=2#4582313)





Date: December 16th, 2005 6:35 PM
Author: naked ratface

120. It's been done (see above).

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=320941&forum_id=2#4582423)





Date: December 16th, 2005 6:41 PM
Author: arrogant native

Damn I suck.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=320941&forum_id=2#4582476)





Date: December 16th, 2005 6:29 PM
Author: pearl violent psychic mood

Long ago, when an inferior poster tried to make a point, Chuck Norris destroyed him with such ferocity and quickness that the poster killed himself immediately. When later asked about the incident, GTO replied:

Poster Was Norrised

And PWN was born.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=320941&forum_id=2#4582360)





Date: December 16th, 2005 6:32 PM
Author: Overrated mauve puppy

awesome

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=320941&forum_id=2#4582389)





Date: December 17th, 2005 11:43 AM
Author: Bateful seedy forum

completely awesome

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=320941&forum_id=2#4588325)





Date: December 16th, 2005 6:34 PM
Author: Metal trailer park

Cool Guys with Cool Haircuts in Delta Force

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=320941&forum_id=2#4582406)





Date: December 16th, 2005 6:35 PM
Author: Metal trailer park

Walker, TTTexas Ranger

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=320941&forum_id=2#4582420)





Date: December 16th, 2005 6:35 PM
Author: Overrated mauve puppy

Egg's RoboCop art was actually Chuck Norris in a RoboCop costume

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=320941&forum_id=2#4582424)





Date: December 16th, 2005 6:42 PM
Author: Internet-worthy faggotry parlour

Chuck Norris has never had amazing sex with someone NOT his boyfriend, because Chuck Norris is not a fag.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=320941&forum_id=2#4582489)





Date: December 16th, 2005 6:43 PM
Author: beady-eyed ticket booth sweet tailpipe

Then wouldn't he always have amazing sex with somebody who isn't his boyfriend? After all, Chuck never has non-amazing sex.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=320941&forum_id=2#4582500)





Date: December 16th, 2005 6:47 PM
Author: Internet-worthy faggotry parlour

Excellent point, there would be no need to specify if the sex was amazing.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=320941&forum_id=2#4582532)





Date: December 16th, 2005 6:47 PM
Author: naked ratface

A gell-headed Chuck Norris crushed Evan-2001/Dan's face using only his beard. Because he had been keeping an eye out for him.

Well, wasn't that a nice end-of-semester surprise!

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=320941&forum_id=2#4582533)





Date: December 16th, 2005 6:48 PM
Author: Overrated mauve puppy

Chuck Norris RIPPED OFF HIS NUTS

I dont think of myself as a shit eating faggot, I think of myself as CHUCK NORRIS



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=320941&forum_id=2#4582542)





Date: December 16th, 2005 6:55 PM
Author: beady-eyed ticket booth sweet tailpipe

Bill McHenry was actually nullo'ed when Chuck Norris flipped out and created a nullifying sonic boom after trying to roundhouse kick away the sadness from Snape killing Dumbledore on page 606.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=320941&forum_id=2#4582614)





Date: December 16th, 2005 7:13 PM
Author: Overrated mauve puppy

Chuck Norris won the "XOXO Smut writing contest" simply by writing "Chuck Norris's penis is hard"

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=320941&forum_id=2#4582772)





Date: December 16th, 2005 7:26 PM
Author: razzle-dazzle amber church building

This made me laugh out loud at the office when I was trying to pretend to work... Thanks a lot dick!

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=320941&forum_id=2#4582890)





Date: December 17th, 2005 1:04 PM
Author: Dun Gunner

Chuck Norris City WAS built in a day by Chuck Norris before he sold it to the Ancient Romans.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=320941&forum_id=2#4588682)





Date: December 30th, 2005 1:07 PM
Author: Bateful seedy forum

I just read about Chuck Norris in US Weekly. Those guys at the football game were real jerks

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=320941&forum_id=2#4695542)





Date: December 30th, 2005 2:24 PM
Author: Flushed School

The guy sitting next to me drew Chuck Norris on his torts exam.

Instead of a grade, the professor roundhouse kicked him in the face.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=320941&forum_id=2#4695953)





Date: February 5th, 2006 5:07 PM
Author: Nighttime main people rigor

haha!

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=320941&forum_id=2#5002804)





Date: December 30th, 2005 2:29 PM
Author: very tactful stage

Robocop is curator of the Museum of Modern Chuck Norris Art.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=320941&forum_id=2#4695981)





Date: December 30th, 2005 2:43 PM
Author: Histrionic pink jew candlestick maker

Chuck Norris is more prestigious than Biglaw

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=320941&forum_id=2#4696079)





Date: December 30th, 2005 3:53 PM
Author: Overrated mauve puppy

Chuck Norris won the "Would Anyone raise kids in a city" debate with a roundhouse

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=320941&forum_id=2#4696514)





Date: January 4th, 2006 5:40 PM
Author: Overrated mauve puppy

chuck norris once hate fucked jill

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=320941&forum_id=2#4734007)





Date: January 4th, 2006 5:46 PM
Author: thriller locale

Chuck Norris notified Haley Jo Osmond, at the time a 6 year old child, that Osmond had contracted the HIV/AIDs virus.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=320941&forum_id=2#4734047)





Date: January 4th, 2006 5:47 PM
Author: hairraiser institution pozpig

Chuck Norris has a room in which he mounts the heads of Feministes he has beheaded via roundhouse kick. The number of heads is equal to the number of Feministes he has had sex with.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=320941&forum_id=2#4734055)





Date: January 4th, 2006 5:48 PM
Author: massive spruce orchestra pit pisswyrm

http://www.jeffandwillandchucknorris.com/

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=320941&forum_id=2#4734062)





Date: February 5th, 2006 4:16 PM
Author: Overrated mauve puppy

Chuck Norris gave Madame Cunt AIDS without giving her HIV. This is the source of her "AIDS knowledge."

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=320941&forum_id=2#5002308)





Date: February 5th, 2006 5:37 PM
Author: Odious Flickering Filthpig

178

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=320941&forum_id=2#5003068)





Date: February 5th, 2006 4:22 PM
Author: Contagious kitchen milk

Chuck Norris can kill people with his mind and then resurrect them with his mind so fast that you don't notice anything has happened.

And then he will kill them with a roundhouse kick to the face.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=320941&forum_id=2#5002360)





Date: February 5th, 2006 4:34 PM
Author: Bearded telephone indirect expression

Hey Chuck Norris, Poetic Dreamer wants his virginity back

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=320941&forum_id=2#5002489)





Date: February 5th, 2006 4:59 PM
Author: Floppy Liquid Oxygen

Non-Chuck Norris threads bump themselves so that they may be closer to Chuck Norris-related threads.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=320941&forum_id=2#5002727)





Date: February 5th, 2006 5:00 PM
Author: yellow soul-stirring abode selfie

Chuck Norris got in everywhere he applied!

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=320941&forum_id=2#5002736)





Date: February 5th, 2006 5:06 PM
Author: Nighttime main people rigor

chuck norris came here and told me a bunch of funy jokes!!!111 unfortunately, i don't remember them because he also gave me a roundhouse kick to the face.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=320941&forum_id=2#5002794)





Date: February 5th, 2006 5:32 PM
Author: infuriating kitty cat

Chuck Norris' roundhouse kicks are both shrewd and decadent.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=320941&forum_id=2#5003029)





Date: February 5th, 2006 8:34 PM
Author: Contagious kitchen milk

Chuck Norris can fart naked all he wants and never get diarrhea all over the carpet.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=320941&forum_id=2#5004352)





Date: October 8th, 2006 1:24 AM
Author: Buck-toothed round eye

Chuck Norris jokes never get old

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=320941&forum_id=2#6748471)





Date: October 8th, 2006 2:06 AM
Author: Sapphire electric pistol weed whacker

chuck norris discovered that FAGGOT FIREFIGHTERS caused all the deaths during 9/11 and killed anne frank.

chuck norris' flow is slick and smooth like diarrhea

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=320941&forum_id=2#6748761)





Date: October 8th, 2006 6:43 AM
Author: deep trip regret theater

is an old useless fuck who was Bruce Lee's bitch and was never any good at a martial art dominated by Asians. he got to where he was by being white, sort of like Vanilla Ice.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=320941&forum_id=2#6749122)