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You should sleep with at LEAST 25 guys before settling down, and Ill tell you e
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Poast new message in this thread
Date: January 14th, 2018 12:11 PM Author: Avocado locus https://babe.net/2017/12/26/you-should-sleep-with-at-least-25-guys-before-settling-down-and-ill-tell-you-exactly-why-26107
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lust • Dec 26 2017 You should sleep with at LEAST 25 guys before settling down, and I’ll tell you exactly why
Ideally more, but y’know, whatever
by Amanda Ross
Throughout history, it's been the bravest of souls who had to fight, die, and become immortalized for their beliefs. Joan of Arc, Gandhi, Jesus. And now me — martyrs for a cause. The fact that I'm about to suffer through dozens of comments calling me a slut should prove to you exactly how serious I am about the thesis of this article:
You have to sleep with at least 25 men before you settle down.
And notice I say men. Gay girls, I trust you. You've known how to maximize the parts with you were born with since that first fateful experience with the shower nozzle in middle school — don't play dumb here, either. You know I know you know.
Anyone with any type of predilection for dick, be it a full-time interest or a part-time thing, should have a sample size of no less than 25 before putting a metaphorical ring around one like some sick, sexual carnival game and settling down for good. You've got to try every type to make an accurate decision
You try on shoes before you buy them. You ask the girl at the frozen yogurt shop for like, 50 little sample cups before deciding on a flavor. You test drive cars before driving them off the lot. So why wouldn't you make an equally informed decision before committing to one guy/dick? Do you even realize how many types there are out there in the world?
Missy Elliot said it best when she sang, "Boys, boys, all types of boys, Black, white, Puerto Rican, Chinese boys." And she didn't even explore the subsets of dick found within each race and nationality either! For example, I was once under the complete delusion that small dicks were "the best." I even wrote a whole babe article about it. Then one day I got wrecked by a member akin to a Chipotle burrito and immediately changed my tune. 25 is a number vast enough to try it all.
How else are you going to figure out what you're into?
What if like, an uncut, left-curving dick is the one thing you need to orgasm but you'll never know it because the guy you've been dating since age 13 has a dick like a baby carrot? And then you'll get married and your hair will grey — as will your shriveled pubes — without ever understanding the pleasure of that initial put-in stroke from a huge dick. Is that really how you want to live your life?
There's a quote by someone famous that I read on the side of a Starbucks cup once and it said some shit like, "At the end of your life, you'll be more upset by the things you didn't do than the things you did." I'm sure he was talking about climbing a mountain or coming out to your family, but I choose to believe he was talking about sucking dick. It's simple math, honestly
There are 8 billion people in the world, and more if we count our future robot overlords and the aliens spying on us from the stars. Even if every person on earth has like, 10 soulmates, do you really think you found yours in you high school algebra class? The vastness of the globe, and you think you met your soulmate at a fucking local Jamba Juice. Girl, no. Explore. Travel. My parents met in Germany, for god's sake. Increase your chances, expand your odds. Touch all the butts, palm all the ballsacks. Find your partner.
Image may contain: Paper, Flyer, Brochure, Poster, Collage Sex is fun! Like, really fun!
Finally, we come to our most important point. Having indiscriminate sex is really, really fun. If you're on some kind of contraception and always use a condom, why shouldn't you Samantha Jones it and consensually bone everyone you've ever encountered? Every time I think I want my flavor of the month to cuff me, I lock eyes with some hot, filthy-looking bearded dude at a dive bar and I remember: there are far, far better dicks ahead than the ones we leave behind.
@itsamandaross
original video by Lauren says she was raped at a high school party. He denied it. b Here’s what your very specific taste in porn says about you
Ya freakin’ sicko Image may contain: Teacher, Person, People, Human
by Caroline Phinney
If we're sticking to our resolutions and 2018 really is a year of reflection, where better than the crusty corners of cleaning-lady-walks-in-on-her-client's-lover Pornhub to do some true soul searching?But for porn veterans who feel they've seen it all, watching someone pound a D in a V just isn't going to do it anymore. So whether…
Continue reading A girl’s guide to non-awkward face-sitting
It’s the femme facial Image may contain: Brick, Woman, Girl, Female, Blonde, Swimwear, Clothing, Bikini, Person, People, Human
by Ari Bines
After doing all the other weird shit in my sex life, I've decide to keep it simple and stick to the one sex act that does wonders to my orgasm: face-sitting.Most girls I know will just let their partner eat 'em up the old-fashioned way: spread eagle while they have at it downtown. But I…
Continue reading Period-trapping is the only way to find out if you’re in a relationship or not
Without just asking Image may contain: Person, People, Human
by Ari Bines
We've thirst-trapped, hurt-trapped, and acted like straight up hoes on our soon-to-expire Instagram stories, but there's a new kind of trapping that'll be more helpful in determining your relationship status, and it's called period-trapping. In many cases (all cases), they won't be the one to define what ya'll are doing together, fucking like rabbits and…
Continue reading babe is for girls who don’t give a fuck Read more Advertise Privacy Policy Archives © 2018 Tab Media
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Date: January 14th, 2018 12:14 PM Author: lake multi-colored windowlicker
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Date: January 14th, 2018 12:16 PM Author: low-t shaky rigor temple What's terrifying is women will take this advice and it will derail their entire lives. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3859156&forum_id=2#35153079) |
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Date: January 15th, 2018 11:45 AM Author: mind-boggling grizzly shitlib (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3859156&forum_id=2#35160078) |
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Date: January 16th, 2018 5:31 AM Author: talking public bath philosopher-king the author saw this comment! (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3859156&forum_id=2#35166283) |
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Date: January 17th, 2018 11:27 AM Author: mind-boggling grizzly shitlib link? (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3859156&forum_id=2#35175312) |
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Date: January 16th, 2018 7:39 AM Author: lilac lodge Women literally do this all the time and find guys they’re perfectly happy with. Most guys aren’t obsessed over the number of partners like XO poasters. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3859156&forum_id=2#35166540) |
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Date: January 16th, 2018 7:42 AM Author: greedy heaven they don't verbalize their discomfort but deep down they know that they've married a whore and have to pretend to be ok with it. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3859156&forum_id=2#35166547) |
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Date: January 14th, 2018 12:18 PM Author: Vivacious maniacal kitchen pic of author: https://scontent-lga3-1.cdninstagram.com/vp/f4a88bc5804f89c87fcbda37d0cd9c6a/5AF58479/t51.2885-15/e35/15623586_1869207646646662_1193021174708174848_n.jpg (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3859156&forum_id=2#35153098) |
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Date: January 14th, 2018 12:19 PM Author: Razzmatazz red pistol lol maybe by "dick" she meant "all the food they consumed in their lifetimes." (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3859156&forum_id=2#35153107) |
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Date: January 14th, 2018 5:14 PM Author: Filthy soul-stirring ceo garrison (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3859156&forum_id=2#35155406) |
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Date: January 17th, 2018 1:09 PM Author: Tantric Naked Step-uncle's House She seems kinda heavy & chunky but never posts a full body pic on her IG. Odd case! (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3859156&forum_id=2#35176152) |
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Date: January 15th, 2018 3:18 PM Author: Massive Hall she looks nice enough, but who's that chick on the right (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3859156&forum_id=2#35161511) |
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Date: January 16th, 2018 3:07 PM Author: bearded sound barrier Bitch got fat from guzzling all that cum. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3859156&forum_id=2#35169466) |
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Date: January 17th, 2018 11:49 AM Author: embarrassed to the bone brilliant jewess almost no full body pics on her instagram is very telling
but the fact remains most xoxo'ers couldn't get a chubby cute girl if they tried
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Date: January 14th, 2018 12:18 PM Author: Razzmatazz red pistol For example, I was once under the complete delusion that small dicks were "the best." I even wrote a whole babe article about it. Then one day I got wrecked by a member akin to a Chipotle burrito and immediately changed my tune. 25 is a number vast enough to try it all (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3859156&forum_id=2#35153100) |
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Date: January 14th, 2018 12:20 PM Author: lake multi-colored windowlicker O.M.G.
TMI!!! |
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Date: January 14th, 2018 12:27 PM Author: Opaque dilemma gaping (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3859156&forum_id=2#35153156) |
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Date: January 16th, 2018 9:36 AM Author: Boyish navy trump supporter approximation of what this hottie looked like near climax with that burrito dick
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Date: January 15th, 2018 12:58 PM Author: bonkers fragrant address repoast (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3859156&forum_id=2#35160590) |
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Date: January 14th, 2018 12:22 PM Author: histrionic sienna whorehouse Her analogy all comes down to shopping. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3859156&forum_id=2#35153122) |
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Date: January 14th, 2018 12:26 PM Author: greedy heaven Sad! (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3859156&forum_id=2#35153149) |
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Date: January 14th, 2018 12:28 PM Author: supple saffron stage persian I thought wearing black was slimming.
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Date: January 14th, 2018 12:30 PM Author: Razzmatazz red pistol reminds me of that "and so did the fat lady" louis ck episode. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3859156&forum_id=2#35153177) |
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Date: January 14th, 2018 12:31 PM Author: Avocado locus Jordahn Smith · Merchandise and Service Coordinator at Ulta Beauty Omg I accomplished 25 the year I lost my virginity. I’m still in search and I lost count after 132 a few years back. Like · Reply · 37 · 2w Michelle Morgan · Georgia Northwestern Technical College Like · Reply · 6 · 2w Jordahn Smith · Merchandise and Service Coordinator at Ulta Beauty Proudly 💕 Like · Reply · 25 · 2w Jeannette Morrisey · Smithville High Get it girl! I’m right there with ya 🙌🏻 Like · Reply · 3 · 2w Casie Randolph · Galion, Ohio Like · Reply · 2 · 2w Bianca Jazzmine Ottley · Pharmacy technician at CVS Pharmacy Like · Reply · 10 · 2w Jacqueline Monica 😔 Like · Reply · 2w Katie Pinto Awesome ❤️❤️❤️ Like · Reply · 2w Taylor McCracken · Kennel Technician at Cozy Inn Pet Resort & Spa - Stahlstown, PA I dont even know 132 people id like to have sex with.
Get std tested regularly. Protect yourself Like · Reply · 12 · 2w Jordahn Smith · Merchandise and Service Coordinator at Ulta Beauty I’m been having sex for over 10 years I think I know what I’m doing by now Like · Reply · 5 · 2w Alicia Louise Robinson · Sales Assistant at Topshop Jordahn Smith To be honest, I think the size of your ear is advertising the size of your vagina hole as well. Tramp. Like · Reply · 1 · 2w Danielle Trussler · Granville TAFE Like · Reply · 1 · 2w Sierra Brantley · Humanities Teacher at Manara Academy Y'all don't have to agree with her but you do have to be kind. Women have enough problems, we don't need to attack eachother to feel better about ourselves. Like · Reply · 4 · 2w Khadija Jardani · Works at Sitel Almelo Sierra Brantley agree! We all make different life choices. Just because it's different doesn't make it better and you should never judge people on it. Like · Reply · 2w |
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Date: January 14th, 2018 3:17 PM Author: lake multi-colored windowlicker
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Date: January 15th, 2018 2:13 PM Author: federal dashing school Jordahn Smith · Merchandise and Service Coordinator at Ulta Beauty
Omg I accomplished 25 the year I lost my virginity. I’m still in search and I lost count after 132 a few years back.
Yeah? 132 was the point at which you were like, "you know what, I'm going to stop counting now"? |
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Date: January 14th, 2018 12:31 PM Author: appetizing new version orchestra pit most women have been with 25 guys by the time they're 16 so this makes sense (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3859156&forum_id=2#35153190) |
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Date: January 14th, 2018 3:11 PM Author: Irate judgmental filthpig i think she's cute and funny (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3859156&forum_id=2#35154409) |
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Date: January 14th, 2018 3:43 PM Author: Electric violet immigrant Not sure why I lol'd at this. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3859156&forum_id=2#35154630) |
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Date: January 14th, 2018 4:00 PM Author: Avocado locus https://twitter.com/itsamandaross/status/952639106772815873 (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3859156&forum_id=2#35154819) |
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Date: January 15th, 2018 12:56 PM Author: bonkers fragrant address (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3859156&forum_id=2#35160584) |
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Date: January 15th, 2018 12:58 PM Author: bonkers fragrant address @itsamandaross Follow Follow @itsamandaross More Replying to @_hannah_tomes Right? Like thanks for saying I have a “normal” body, too bad you’ll never see it! |
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Date: January 15th, 2018 12:56 PM Author: Floppy amethyst prole station she needs to take a hard look at her sexual morals (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3859156&forum_id=2#35160582) |
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Date: January 14th, 2018 4:25 PM Author: Avocado locus Amanda Ross
3:33 PM (50 minutes ago)
to me Luckily my normal female body and I think you’re trash! Have a blessed Sunday!
Sent from my iPhone *** <***@gmail.com>
4:24 PM (0 minutes ago)
to Amanda Amanda - I enjoyed the meta-critique of our interaction in your latest Tweet. Have you and/or your colleagues considered joining our discussion boart and perhaps participating in our dialogue? You may find some of the topics we cover eye-opening. Please do not hesitate to contact us for a personalized moniker as we do practice extreme vetting on potential poasters.
Thank, Danae |
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Date: January 15th, 2018 11:45 AM Author: Lascivious Degenerate (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3859156&forum_id=2#35160083) |
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Date: January 14th, 2018 5:10 PM Author: Avocado locus (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3859156&forum_id=2#35155378) |
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Date: January 15th, 2018 11:45 AM Author: blue godawful athletic conference field "I was once under the complete delusion that small dicks were "the best." I even wrote a whole babe article about it. Then one day I got wrecked by a member akin to a Chipotle burrito and immediately changed my tune."
quite the delusion she was under. I'm glad she has now turned toward the truth |
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Date: January 15th, 2018 1:18 PM Author: Anal den oh yeah. what guy isn't going to want to hit that now. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3859156&forum_id=2#35160735) |
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Date: January 15th, 2018 11:48 AM Author: mind-boggling grizzly shitlib https://mobile.twitter.com/haroldtkerr/status/952690661853155329
Herold kerr, OUT your moniker |
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Date: January 15th, 2018 1:12 PM Author: Anal den who is going to want to marry a chick like this? who? (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3859156&forum_id=2#35160688) |
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Date: January 15th, 2018 1:14 PM Author: Jet Flatulent Cumskin agreed.
and to me, it's far less the fucking around and far more the (i) desire to broadcast her personal and romantic life to the public and (ii) the fucking around as an end in and of itself. |
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Date: January 15th, 2018 1:18 PM Author: Anal den yep. Exactly. its not the fucking around which if done secretly or discretely I suppose a lot of guys wouldn't be crazy about but if they like her ...
But the shameless broadcasting because she needs to feel like a "writer" and the raunchy stuff. JFC no dude is gonna want that. Holy shit can you imagine a dude's bros googling her after they find out they are serious and finding that shit. Ugh. And then she acts like a bitch or keeps packing it on early in the game .... ugh. no way man. no fucking way. she's self selected herself out of a stable life path already. |
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Date: January 15th, 2018 2:10 PM Author: swashbuckling chestnut knife laser beams You're projecting your patriarchal beliefs on her. What makes you think she wants all that? (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3859156&forum_id=2#35161038) |
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Date: January 16th, 2018 7:16 AM Author: Anal den Well, of course she can rationalize that she doesn't now, because that's what she's excluding for herself anyway. But of course they all want it. They crave infantilization, someone to take care of them, coddle their insane bullshit. |
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Date: January 15th, 2018 1:14 PM Author: Anal den shes gonna be gross as fuck in ten years. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3859156&forum_id=2#35160709) |
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Date: January 15th, 2018 1:54 PM Author: racy ivory voyeur abode Who is this GOBBLEPIG? (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3859156&forum_id=2#35160964) |
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Date: January 15th, 2018 1:55 PM Author: adulterous location kitty i wonder, are there as many varieties of pussy as their are of dick? (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3859156&forum_id=2#35160968) |
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Date: January 15th, 2018 1:59 PM Author: snowy chapel She looks like a perfectly acceptable slump-buster. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3859156&forum_id=2#35160984) |
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Date: January 16th, 2018 4:28 PM Author: Bistre bipolar area we all have a lot in life. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3859156&forum_id=2#35169943) |
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Date: January 17th, 2018 11:52 AM Author: embarrassed to the bone brilliant jewess i was thinking the same thing
I am Groot |
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Date: January 15th, 2018 6:02 PM Author: mind-boggling grizzly shitlib Lol, escalation of force here (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3859156&forum_id=2#35162703) |
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Date: January 16th, 2018 12:26 PM Author: bonkers fragrant address arent you a virginal dork or something similar (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3859156&forum_id=2#35168056) |
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Date: January 17th, 2018 11:57 AM Author: Overrated Big Fanboi Another casualty of high fructose corn syrup. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3859156&forum_id=2#35175548) |