- Newborns wake up every few hours crying, so sleep deprivation is a given. You're probably still working. So your schedule is sleep --> work --> home --> kid (she is exhausted and needs a break at this point) --> sleep.

- Often there are other family members showing up which adds to stress (though, they sometimes help too) and also adds to the fact that there's little alone time.

- Financial strain = stress.

The combination of all of that means that sex basically disappears for a long time.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3909965&forum_id=2#35541132)

If you just aren't getting laid and just need some strange then fuck some escort, never tell your wife, go home to your family and keep trying to salvage it. If your kid is 3 and everything still sucks ass then sure, you can move on then. But 2 months isn't a place where it is reasonable to bail.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3909965&forum_id=2#35535259)

I worry about the child, a lot. But deep down inside I think we both know we’re only together anymore because of my daughter. And she doesn’t deserve this, just like we don’t deserve to live with someone that doesn’t make us happy.

Things aren’t just tough now, they’ve been so for several months.

But today was the first real big step. So I’m sure we’ll keep trying.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3909965&forum_id=2#35535297)

This will have a ripple effect on your marriage and other aspects of your life.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3909965&forum_id=2#35535322)

If you need to move into separate rooms so each can take turns sleeping and taking care of the kid then fine.

If you need to do whatever to blow off steam, fine.

But then come home and try to be a decent person to your wife and your kid. Yeah, it is hard sometimes and occasionally you'll fail, but at least you won't be the complete asshole that abandoned your wife and newborn as soon as the going got a bit tough.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3909965&forum_id=2#35535327)

Thanks fish.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3909965&forum_id=2#35535398)

you had a child. re-evaluate in 5 years.

I know it sucks because, I and half the other brehs here, have been there before. don't "Eat Pray Love" your way out. tough it out and be a man. Trust me, you'll be happier for it.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3909965&forum_id=2#35535659)

the evidence is UNEQUIVOCAL that divorce is a disaster for children. full stop. there is no such thing as "it would be better for the kids than the parents having a less than perfect marriage." nope. it's literally the opposite of that you dumb fuck, as is perfectly clear to anyone who isn't batshit insane and has been proved by every single study.

Let me be perfectly clear: YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED to argue your selfish choice is in the best interests of your child, you sick fuck. At long last, have you no decency?

You are not owed a perfect married life, faggot. That was your responsibility to lock down before you reproduced. your children are owed a home and family with their married parents.

ISHTH you disgusting cumchugging septic queer masquerading as a "man" and "father."

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3909965&forum_id=2#35537979)

but that's not the reason you're broken

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3909965&forum_id=2#35540226)

And a stalwart lover for sure

These are the riches of the poor

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3909965&forum_id=2#35535689)

in any case OP you sound totally pathetic. Saying hurtful things and becoming unattractive are not things a man should do

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3909965&forum_id=2#35535278)

not sure whom your're mixing me up with, but it's nice to know I'm categorized among the fungible in your "totally pathetic" box.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3909965&forum_id=2#35538325)

how long have you been fighting?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3909965&forum_id=2#35535333)

Several big fights for the last 6-8 months.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3909965&forum_id=2#35535376)

We tick each other's boxes, find each other reasonably attractive, both make good money, etc, but aren't super compatible personality-wise.

I assumed having a kid eventually would bring us closer but this thread is making me second-guess that idea...

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3909965&forum_id=2#35536028)

This is awful since this is one of the most important things.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3909965&forum_id=2#35538757)

Guess what? When you have kids, your needs don't come first anymore. Sorry you're not getting enough attention or sex or your wife said something "hurtful." It's time to start being an adult, not some guy who flees to Tinder after a few rough months. The whole "it hasn't been working for a while" sounds like an excuse for you to throw in the towel and be self-indulgent.

Take a big deep breathe and pull it together and realize it's no longer about you.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3909965&forum_id=2#35535409)

I don't see what the problem is here?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3909965&forum_id=2#35535488)

Getting good sleep is most important

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3909965&forum_id=2#35536117)

When we get a larger house we will both have separate caves to do stuff in. A man cave and woman cave.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3909965&forum_id=2#35536253)

She’s been through a lot. Seems obvious but it’s important to keep in mind. Her body has been through a physical and emotional ringer. Her hormones are all over the place. Her work and social life just came to a screeching halt. She’s in charge of keeping this very fragile thing alive every day and it is really scary to be learning how to do everything when that is at stake. She wants/needs help but also feels like if she can’t do or figure it out on her own then she’s a bad mom. And on top of all that, she is absolutely exhausted.

Be patient. Ask what you can do to help. Take the baby for a walk or a drive so she can have some quiet time, but also keep in mind that being away from the baby might make her anxious. It’s as frustrating for her as it is for you. Watch for signs of post-partum depression.

Be there for her, and remember that she won’t always be rational about things. She’s under immense stress and pressure all with roller coaster hormones making it worse. Be the rock you’re supposed to be.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3909965&forum_id=2#35535935)

- different sleep schedules sucks, but otherwise you're apart all night so still a net positive;

- shifting in bed = get a better bed

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3909965&forum_id=2#35536158)

we've got a 3 y/o and have to admit to not experiencing the kinds of arguments and tension other poasters have described. but i certainly wouldn't make any decisions during the first two months of having a kid around---things really do settle down a bit and might improve and you'll be better placed to make a decision when you're not sleep-deprived and overwhelmed by figuring out how to deal with the babby.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3909965&forum_id=2#35537967)