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ITT you poast one joke

I'll start. "I just want a woman who loves me and a goo...
disrespectful thriller abode
  04/20/18
https://www.reuters.com/article/us-russia-post-drone-crash/r...
Aromatic Submissive Locus Telephone
  04/20/18
What did the paraplegic boy who was deaf blind and dumb get ...
sickened dashing forum mexican
  04/20/18
handjob
Aromatic Submissive Locus Telephone
  04/20/18
Cancer
sickened dashing forum mexican
  04/20/18
I'm a bad lover. Once I caught a peeping tom booing me.
Tripping buck-toothed pit pisswyrm
  04/20/18
lol
puce misanthropic home
  04/20/18
I get no respect, no respect at all!
mind-boggling menage
  04/20/18
A farmer stopped by the local shop to have his tractor repai...
brindle boyish sandwich library
  04/20/18
The lady was peterman
180 mentally impaired state useless brakes
  04/20/18
lol
brindle boyish sandwich library
  04/20/18
170. Too long a wait for the punchline.
disrespectful thriller abode
  04/20/18
lol
chestnut awkward plaza
  04/20/18
What did the black kid get on his SAT? Barbecue sauce.
Histrionic mildly autistic prole
  04/20/18
...
abusive lettuce
  04/20/18
fucking lol
violet partner nursing home
  04/20/18
180
disrespectful thriller abode
  04/20/18
So I'm fucking this girl, right? And it's going good, but I ...
puce misanthropic home
  04/20/18
155. Kiddie rape jokes just arent funny.
disrespectful thriller abode
  04/20/18
A guy was walking to a bar and on his way he found a girl ti...
milky ticket booth
  04/20/18
...
Aromatic Submissive Locus Telephone
  04/20/18
180
disrespectful thriller abode
  04/20/18
what happened to the jew with a boner who ran into a wall? ...
Yellow puppy pozpig
  04/20/18
179
disrespectful thriller abode
  04/20/18
What did the Nazi say to the black Jew? Get t...
hyperactive trip chad black woman
  04/20/18
What's the difference between a black man and a pizza? A ...
hyperactive trip chad black woman
  04/20/18
My favorite joke of all time. 3 guys are hiking through ...
Slate Meetinghouse
  04/20/18
Women's rights
sooty mischievous depressive
  04/21/18


Poast new message in this thread



Reply Favorite

Date: April 20th, 2018 7:48 AM
Author: disrespectful thriller abode

I'll start. "I just want a woman who loves me and a good mother for my children and I hope the two never meet." BAM! Funny.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3954580&forum_id=2#35880242)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 20th, 2018 7:49 AM
Author: Aromatic Submissive Locus Telephone

https://www.reuters.com/article/us-russia-post-drone-crash/russian-postal-drone-program-hits-wall-in-debut-idUSKCN1H91B4

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3954580&forum_id=2#35880248)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 20th, 2018 7:51 AM
Author: sickened dashing forum mexican

What did the paraplegic boy who was deaf blind and dumb get for Christmas?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3954580&forum_id=2#35880253)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 20th, 2018 7:53 AM
Author: Aromatic Submissive Locus Telephone

handjob

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3954580&forum_id=2#35880254)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 20th, 2018 7:53 AM
Author: sickened dashing forum mexican

Cancer

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3954580&forum_id=2#35880255)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 20th, 2018 8:02 AM
Author: Tripping buck-toothed pit pisswyrm

I'm a bad lover. Once I caught a peeping tom booing me.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3954580&forum_id=2#35880273)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 20th, 2018 8:34 AM
Author: puce misanthropic home

lol

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3954580&forum_id=2#35880368)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 20th, 2018 10:55 AM
Author: mind-boggling menage

I get no respect, no respect at all!

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3954580&forum_id=2#35881124)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 20th, 2018 8:17 AM
Author: brindle boyish sandwich library

A farmer stopped by the local shop to have his tractor repaired. They couldn't do the work while he waited, and so, since he didn't live far from the shop, he decided to walk home.

On the way home, he stopped at the hardware store and bought a bucket and an anvil. He stopped at the feed store/ livestock dealer and picked up a couple of chickens and a goose. However, he had a problem... How to carry his entire purchase home.

The feed store owner said, "Why don't you put the anvil in the bucket, carry the bucket in one hand, put a chicken under each arm and carry the goose in your other hand?" "Hey, thanks!" said the farmer, and out the door he went.

While walking, he was approached by a little old lady who told him she was lost and asked if he could tell her the way to 1603 Mockingbird Lane.

The farmer said "as a matter of fact, I live at 1616 Mockingbird Lane. We can take a shortcut down this alley and be there in no time".

The little old lady looked him over cautiously, and then said, "I am a lonely widow without a husband to defend me. How do I know that when we get in the alley you won't hold me up against the wall, pull up my skirt, and ravish me?"

The farmer said, "Holy smokes lady! I'm carrying a bucket, an anvil, two chickens, and a goose. How in Hell could I possibly hold you up against a wall and do that?"

The lady said, "Set the goose down, cover him with the bucket, put the anvil on top of the bucket, and I'll hold the chickens."

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3954580&forum_id=2#35880314)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 20th, 2018 8:29 AM
Author: 180 mentally impaired state useless brakes

The lady was peterman

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3954580&forum_id=2#35880352)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 20th, 2018 8:36 AM
Author: brindle boyish sandwich library

lol

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3954580&forum_id=2#35880376)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 20th, 2018 12:39 PM
Author: disrespectful thriller abode

170. Too long a wait for the punchline.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3954580&forum_id=2#35881770)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 20th, 2018 12:56 PM
Author: chestnut awkward plaza

lol

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3954580&forum_id=2#35881872)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 20th, 2018 8:34 AM
Author: Histrionic mildly autistic prole

What did the black kid get on his SAT? Barbecue sauce.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3954580&forum_id=2#35880367)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 20th, 2018 8:58 AM
Author: abusive lettuce



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3954580&forum_id=2#35880440)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 20th, 2018 10:42 AM
Author: violet partner nursing home

fucking lol

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3954580&forum_id=2#35881034)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 20th, 2018 12:39 PM
Author: disrespectful thriller abode

180

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3954580&forum_id=2#35881766)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 20th, 2018 8:39 AM
Author: puce misanthropic home

So I'm fucking this girl, right? And it's going good, but I decide I want to mix it up, so I flip her over and put my dick in her ass. She turns around, glares at me and says, "Wow, it's really presumptuous of you to think I would just be ok with that."

I said, "Presumptuous? That's a pretty big word for a 10 year old."

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3954580&forum_id=2#35880386)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 20th, 2018 12:38 PM
Author: disrespectful thriller abode

155. Kiddie rape jokes just arent funny.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3954580&forum_id=2#35881765)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 20th, 2018 8:53 AM
Author: milky ticket booth

A guy was walking to a bar and on his way he found a girl tied up to the railroad tracks. He untied her and they had sex. Guy gets to the bar, friends ask why he's so late, tells them about the girl he found and all the different positions they fucked in. Friends give him props and ask if he got head, guy replies "I couldn't find it.”

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3954580&forum_id=2#35880427)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 20th, 2018 10:41 AM
Author: Aromatic Submissive Locus Telephone



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3954580&forum_id=2#35881011)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 20th, 2018 12:38 PM
Author: disrespectful thriller abode

180

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3954580&forum_id=2#35881763)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 20th, 2018 10:58 AM
Author: Yellow puppy pozpig

what happened to the jew with a boner who ran into a wall?

he broke his nose

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3954580&forum_id=2#35881151)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 20th, 2018 12:37 PM
Author: disrespectful thriller abode

179

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3954580&forum_id=2#35881762)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 20th, 2018 12:40 PM
Author: hyperactive trip chad black woman

What did the Nazi say to the black Jew?

Get to the back of the oven

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3954580&forum_id=2#35881778)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 20th, 2018 12:44 PM
Author: hyperactive trip chad black woman

What's the difference between a black man and a pizza?

A pizza can feed a family of four

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3954580&forum_id=2#35881808)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 20th, 2018 1:03 PM
Author: Slate Meetinghouse

My favorite joke of all time.

3 guys are hiking through the woods when they find a lamp.

One of them picks it up, rubs it, and out pops a Genie.

It booms "You have finally freed me after all these years, so I'll grant each one of you 3 wishes." The first guy immediately blurts out "I want a billion dollars." POOF, he's holding a printout that shows his account balance is now in fact 1,000,000,003.50

The second man thinks for a bit, then says "I want to be the richest man alive." POOF, he's holding papers showing his net worth is now well over 100 billion.

The third guy thinks even longer about his wish, then says "I want my left arm to rotate clockwise for the rest of my life." POOF, his arm starts rotating.

The Genie tells them it's time for their second wish.

First guy says: "I want to be married to the most beautiful woman on earth." POOF, a stunning beauty wraps herself around his arm.

Second guy says "I want to be good-looking and charismatic, so I can have every girl I want." POOF, his looks change and the first guy's wife immediately starts flirting with him.

Third guy says "I want my right arm to rotate counter-clockwise until I die." POOF, now both his arms are rotating, in opposite directions.

The genie tells them to think very carefully about their third wish.

First guy does, and after a while says "I never want to become sick or injured, I want to stay healthy until I die." POOF, his complexion improves, his acne is gone and his knees don't bother him any more.

Second guy says "I never want to grow old. I want to stay 29 forever." POOF, he looks younger already.

Third guy smiles triumphantly and says "My last wish is for my head to nod back and forth." POOF, he's now nodding his head and still flailing his arms around.

The genie wishes them good luck, disappears, and the men soon go their separate ways.

Many years later they meet again and chat about how things have been going. First guy is ecstatic: "I've invested the money and multiplied it many times over, so me and my family will be among the richest of the rich pretty much forever. My wife is a freak in the sheets, and I've never gotten so much as a cold in all these years." Second guy smiles and says "Well, I built charities worldwide with a fraction of my wealth, I'm still the richest guy alive and also revered for my good deeds. I haven't aged a day since we last met, and yes, your wife is pretty wild in bed."

Third guy walks in, flailing his arms around and nodding his head, and says:

"Guys, I think I fucked up."

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3954580&forum_id=2#35881921)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 21st, 2018 1:43 AM
Author: sooty mischievous depressive

Women's rights

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3954580&forum_id=2#35886779)