Anyone else's parents weird about sharing info on health problems with other fam
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Date: April 22nd, 2018 11:52 PM Author: mauve fear-inspiring dilemma
I guess I don't talk with my grandma as much as I should, but tonight I found out from her that she is about to move into an assisted living facility.
My father has ordinarily been something of a clearinghouse on what is going on with everyone else in the family, so to not hear this information from him is pretty suspect. He definitely knew and chose not to share this with me.
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3956964&forum_id=2#35897868) |
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Date: April 23rd, 2018 12:04 AM Author: mauve fear-inspiring dilemma
My grandmother moving into assisted living is none of my business?
My dad is happy to keep people in the loop on everything else that is going on in the family.
In fact, he's been on the flip side of this kind of thing in the past. He blabbed about my sister's miscarriage to a bunch of people, which royally pissed off my sister
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3956964&forum_id=2#35897964) |
Date: April 23rd, 2018 12:01 AM Author: Orchid bearded space pocket flask
I hate family gossip. They aren't there to "help each other" but to "learn about what's going on with each other." It's interesting gossip to get once in a while, and as long as you call back to "check" you can pretend you give a shit while doing nothing for them.
I hate my extended family and never talk to them because of the above stated facts.
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3956964&forum_id=2#35897944) |
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Date: April 23rd, 2018 12:44 AM Author: mauve fear-inspiring dilemma
I will talk with them about it.
I talked with them earlier today and they didn't say anything about it. I found out later this evening when I talked with my grandma myself.
This thread though isn't exactly about her, it's about my parents selectively not sharing things when they ought to, and sharing other things when it's pretty clear that they shouldn't.
It's really fucking frustrating
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3956964&forum_id=2#35898170) |
Date: April 23rd, 2018 12:18 AM Author: Provocative Fiercely-loyal Corner
i get that you are hurt because this is pretty big news, and it sounds like you were the last to hear. i might also think it was an intentional omission given your dads past behavior, which is indeoendently hurtful
It's a difficult transition both for your grandma and your dad. i really try not to infer bad intentions, so maybe now that you know, focis on being as helpful as your can to your grandma.
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3956964&forum_id=2#35898052)
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Date: April 23rd, 2018 12:32 AM Author: mauve fear-inspiring dilemma
Well, she's definitely been on a bit of decline over the last year or so.
This thread isn't even really about her though TBH. It's about my dad either omitting info or oversharing at basically every possible opportunity.
There have been multiple events with himself and my mother that I didn't hear about until unacceptably late in the process of things. Somewhat recently, he passed out and had the rescue squad called on him and I didn't find out until well afterward.
He put the family dog down when I was in college without telling me about it beforehand.
With my sister's miscarriage, she suddenly started getting sympathy cards in the mail from fairly distant relatives despite her only telling our mother about it. It was her first pregnancy and she was pretty distraught about it. My sister was so pissed that she ceased talking to my mom and dad, which made my mother nearly suicidal.
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3956964&forum_id=2#35898123) |
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Date: April 23rd, 2018 2:35 AM Author: mauve fear-inspiring dilemma
To some extent, this is part of it.
My dad lives in the same city as my grandma.
My dad has this second home a hundred miles or so away from my grandma. He absolutely loves it there but she's supposedly been lobbying to get them to spend more time on her & less time at their vacation home
Getting old sucks for real and I don't envy my father or grandmother in the totality of all of this
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3956964&forum_id=2#35898502) |
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