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told female friend tonight how much i wanted to eat her out...

Date: August 22nd, 2007 2:55 AM Author: Bristol Palin's ret...
very tactful whorehouse crotch
  10/15/14
...
big locus psychic
  10/15/14
Well must say, that rapist wit and aggression took me by sur...
Histrionic turdskin legend
  10/15/14
I forgot the origin of the "phone pee dialed for 911&qu...
Beta soggy stag film kitty
  10/15/14
sooo good
very tactful whorehouse crotch
  10/15/14
dvp needs to chronicle his social interactions in long form ...
Stimulating gaped dog poop
  10/15/14
Always great
Trip Twinkling Uncleanness
  10/15/14
...
very tactful whorehouse crotch
  10/17/14
!!!
amethyst aromatic mexican quadroon
  10/17/14
wtf
talking lavender indian lodge masturbator
  10/17/14
This is embarrassing
Dull Twisted Rehab Hominid
  10/17/14
fuck this is so good. would read again. was momentarily comp...
Hairless ebony stead rigpig
  10/17/14
I thought this was lost to the ages. A spectacularly unique ...
Mildly Autistic Pit
  10/17/14
yeah, I've wanted to read this for so long. OP does good wor...
doobsian principal's office gaming laptop
  10/17/14
thanks!! also been tryna spread this one if u haven't seen ...
very tactful whorehouse crotch
  10/17/14
can you find ari "the schnoz" goldberg and madelin...
dun aphrodisiac meetinghouse
  11/05/14
I kind of miss when "loserfucker" was part of bort...
autistic abode knife
  10/17/14
...
doobsian principal's office gaming laptop
  10/26/14
...
Silver Pisswyrm
  10/26/14
...
very tactful whorehouse crotch
  11/05/14
Holy shit, this is one of the first posts I remember reading...
Buck-toothed Mad Cow Disease
  11/05/14
Where's the follow up poast where he fucks her ragged the wh...
Sticky hissy fit
  11/05/14
oh ho!
Beady-eyed dingle berry immigrant
  11/05/14
my favorite line
a lawyer who posts on the internet
  06/08/26
never caught this one until now. thnx.
internet-worthy casino
  11/05/14
...
excitant point personal credit line
  06/06/20
...
very tactful whorehouse crotch
  02/11/22
...
Jet piazza boiling water
  03/05/22
tyft
vivacious light depressive athletic conference
  03/05/22
...
fuck her right in the pussy
  06/08/26
Important bump
Emotionally + Physically Abusive Ex-Husband
  06/08/26
...
fuck her right in the pussy
  06/08/26
Bristol Palin’s retarded incest baby was a 1800000 mon...
'"'"''"
  06/08/26


Poast new message in this thread



Reply Favorite

Date: October 15th, 2014 6:43 AM
Author: very tactful whorehouse crotch

Date: August 22nd, 2007 2:55 AM

Author: Bristol Palin's retarded incest baby (You keep calling me Babu. It's Singh, mother fucker.)

though i certainly intended to flirt with her, i had not seriously considered telling her that i fantasized about eating her out ( which i do) it just came up.

see she was talking to me about this loserfuck ( she actually did call him a loser) she is obsessed with for reasons she herself does not understand. he is some low level officer in the navy while she is off to the peace corps in february. she is obsessed with him but according to her he doesn't give a crap about her, just using her as a convenient booty call. she told me the guy was so vapid and beneath her and low class and emotionally cold and yada yada but that she couldn't stop thinking about him and obsessing over him etc.

she asks me what she should do and i just tell her not to get too emotional or romantic about him, since the peace corps will end all chance for a relationship and probably change the very things she finds attractive in a man.

Now at this point in time i am thinking my friend's attachment to this douche is physical. she is VERY sexual, the relationship she describes sounds like a fuck buddy relationship gone complicated, and in my head i am imagining a buff navy jock.

so i add....." if the fucking is good just use him as a living dildo ..." but the fucking ISN'T good" she exclaims . what to do you mean i ask " he doesn't care about me , even in bed he is a very selfish lover"

Now i am a virgin, but i am pretty aware of what this phrase means. not only that, but i am aware my friend loves to get eaten out, how do i know this? because she has a guide to eating out pussy on her fucking myspace. its literally the first thing you see, and its been there for at least a year.

"so he doesn''t go down on you " i tell her. she looks slightly shocked." well i know you like to get eaten out since you have a guide for it on your myspace"

she starts laughing, but after a bit she looks at me and she sya " i do love it" she says , and blushes. " he never doesit " she complains. well why would he, if he knows he can just fuck you ?

" yeah he doesn't even have to ask we just get alone and im on him,but it sucks every time!"

now this entire conversation i have had my left arm over her shoulders, this conversation has taken place in the form of conspiratorial whispers in each others ears. at this point in time i lean in. " you know that time we went dancing at passion and you had that black skirt on" " yeah" only then did i notice you have great legs ( she laughs) ever since then i have wanted to eat you out,( oh ho! she says) you don't have to do anything ( Noo she says and starts slowlly but firmly pushing me away with both hands) " you don't have to do anything just lie there and enjoy and of course tell me what yu want ( she keeps pushing me slowly away) " i won't even take off my clothes, ill put a cell phone in your hand so you can call the cops if i dosomething you don't want" ( at this point she says my name and says no firmly.)

I look at her for twenty or so seconds and then say " allright" I scoot away so there is a good 30 inches of space separating us. the next couple of minutes are somewhat awkward. but Ten minutes later we are talking like NOTHING happened.

we then continued a series of raucus and interesting conversations, even returning to the navy guy, but also discussing the peace corps the imminent start for law school for me , the craziness of central african nations. we talked for another THREE AND A HALF hours after my very explicit comeon and there was no akwardness or sign of damage to our friendhsip.

we are hanging out again on saturday.

oh and the setting was a small bar/restaurant with these little nooks and such.

and for those who are going to tell me that i came on as desperate and that i am FRIENDZONEPWNED be aware i am already aware of this . i am resigned to my fate. she was never long term girlfriend material and icertainly have no romantic feelings towards her.

she is just a funny supercool latina CGWBT. if all i can be with her is friends ill gladly take the friendship.

why can't more girls be like this? THIS is how you turn down a pass, you don't have to go ahead and make the guy asahmed that he has a cock betweeen his legs. my friend was very firm, but she did not make me feel bad or guilty or anything. learn from this girls.

( http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=675218&forum_id=2#8544713 )

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2700247&forum_id=2).#26519775)



Reply Favorite

Date: October 15th, 2014 7:00 AM
Author: big locus psychic



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2700247&forum_id=2).#26519788)



Reply Favorite

Date: October 15th, 2014 8:11 AM
Author: Histrionic turdskin legend

Well must say, that rapist wit and aggression took me by surprise.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2700247&forum_id=2).#26519900)



Reply Favorite

Date: October 15th, 2014 8:29 AM
Author: Beta soggy stag film kitty

I forgot the origin of the "phone pee dialed for 911" meme, thanks for the reminder. I'll just circle back when I need a quick laugh

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2700247&forum_id=2).#26519953)



Reply Favorite

Date: October 15th, 2014 3:08 PM
Author: very tactful whorehouse crotch

sooo good

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2700247&forum_id=2).#26522226)



Reply Favorite

Date: October 15th, 2014 3:09 PM
Author: Stimulating gaped dog poop

dvp needs to chronicle his social interactions in long form like this.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2700247&forum_id=2).#26522233)



Reply Favorite

Date: October 15th, 2014 3:16 PM
Author: Trip Twinkling Uncleanness

Always great

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2700247&forum_id=2).#26522297)



Reply Favorite

Date: October 17th, 2014 9:30 PM
Author: very tactful whorehouse crotch



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2700247&forum_id=2).#26538501)



Reply Favorite

Date: October 17th, 2014 9:32 PM
Author: amethyst aromatic mexican quadroon

!!!

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2700247&forum_id=2).#26538515)



Reply Favorite

Date: October 17th, 2014 9:32 PM
Author: talking lavender indian lodge masturbator

wtf

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2700247&forum_id=2).#26538516)



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Date: October 17th, 2014 9:35 PM
Author: Dull Twisted Rehab Hominid

This is embarrassing

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2700247&forum_id=2).#26538531)



Reply Favorite

Date: October 17th, 2014 9:37 PM
Author: Hairless ebony stead rigpig

fuck this is so good. would read again. was momentarily completely consumed by this story.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2700247&forum_id=2).#26538541)



Reply Favorite

Date: October 17th, 2014 9:42 PM
Author: Mildly Autistic Pit

I thought this was lost to the ages. A spectacularly unique post.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2700247&forum_id=2).#26538567)



Reply Favorite

Date: October 17th, 2014 9:45 PM
Author: doobsian principal's office gaming laptop

yeah, I've wanted to read this for so long. OP does good work around here.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2700247&forum_id=2).#26538588)



Reply Favorite

Date: October 17th, 2014 9:48 PM
Author: very tactful whorehouse crotch

thanks!! also been tryna spread this one if u haven't seen http://www.xoxohth.com/thread.php?thread_id=2700246&forum_id=2

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2700247&forum_id=2).#26538619)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 5th, 2014 9:23 AM
Author: dun aphrodisiac meetinghouse

can you find ari "the schnoz" goldberg and madeline "numbah two" chen?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2700247&forum_id=2).#26653055)



Reply Favorite

Date: October 17th, 2014 9:51 PM
Author: autistic abode knife

I kind of miss when "loserfucker" was part of bort lexicon.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2700247&forum_id=2).#26538650)



Reply Favorite

Date: October 26th, 2014 12:26 AM
Author: doobsian principal's office gaming laptop



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2700247&forum_id=2).#26587986)



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Date: October 26th, 2014 12:26 AM
Author: Silver Pisswyrm



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2700247&forum_id=2).#26587988)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 5th, 2014 5:45 AM
Author: very tactful whorehouse crotch



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2700247&forum_id=2).#26652645)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 5th, 2014 10:29 AM
Author: Buck-toothed Mad Cow Disease

Holy shit, this is one of the first posts I remember reading on xo. Getting a little teary eyed here.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2700247&forum_id=2).#26653282)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 5th, 2014 10:31 AM
Author: Sticky hissy fit

Where's the follow up poast where he fucks her ragged the whole weekend?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2700247&forum_id=2).#26653296)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 5th, 2014 11:18 AM
Author: Beady-eyed dingle berry immigrant

oh ho!

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2700247&forum_id=2).#26653485)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 8th, 2026 10:16 AM
Author: a lawyer who posts on the internet

my favorite line

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2700247&forum_id=2).#49922129)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 5th, 2014 11:25 AM
Author: internet-worthy casino

never caught this one until now. thnx.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2700247&forum_id=2).#26653508)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 6th, 2020 7:53 PM
Author: excitant point personal credit line



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2700247&forum_id=2).#40365552)



Reply Favorite

Date: February 11th, 2022 10:19 PM
Author: very tactful whorehouse crotch



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2700247&forum_id=2).#43954057)



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Date: March 5th, 2022 10:05 AM
Author: Jet piazza boiling water



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2700247&forum_id=2).#44089135)



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Date: March 5th, 2022 10:15 AM
Author: vivacious light depressive athletic conference

tyft

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2700247&forum_id=2).#44089181)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 8th, 2026 1:20 AM
Author: fuck her right in the pussy



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2700247&forum_id=2).#49921834)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 8th, 2026 1:31 AM
Author: Emotionally + Physically Abusive Ex-Husband (oppose bitchbois)

Important bump

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2700247&forum_id=2).#49921844)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 8th, 2026 2:10 PM
Author: fuck her right in the pussy



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2700247&forum_id=2).#49922845)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 8th, 2026 2:13 PM
Author: '"'"''"

Bristol Palin’s retarded incest baby was a 1800000 moniker

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2700247&forum_id=2).#49922870)