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Chauvin sat at the bar and took a long drag on his cigarette...

Not much of a celebration, he thought. At least now it was o...
ungodly sapphire laser beams native
  04/06/21
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citrine corn cake
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Made me smile
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He stubbed the Marlboro Light against the bottom of the glas...
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...
ungodly sapphire laser beams native
  04/06/21
We have the makings of a blockbuster here fellas. Gotta work...
sticky bright theater stage
  04/06/21
already demand for this movie on twitter: https://twitter.c...
exhilarant brunch depressive
  04/06/21
...
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  04/06/21
ur faggot twitter account is probably going to cause problem...
Titillating indirect expression
  04/07/21
180
exhilarant brunch depressive
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I thought this was about Ted Cruz tp
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The bathroom door creaked open and the three men looked at e...
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Save Goetz for phase 2. Maybe a fun, neon 80s throwback. Tai...
ungodly sapphire laser beams native
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...
Spruce boistinker
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Agreed. I’m thinking some flashback origin story for ...
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i *really* like it here
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...
Embarrassed To The Bone Piazza Jap
  04/07/21
Jesus, they’d roped the Kenosha Kid into this too? &ld...
ungodly sapphire laser beams native
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Chauvin turned the bottle of hooch on its side on the bar to...
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180
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lol
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180
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great thread
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New New Hollywood
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To be fair, "Look fellas, I'm really not in the mood...
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this is vintage xo greatness i haven't seen in some time
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Titillating indirect expression
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bearded misunderstood old irish cottage jewess
  04/06/21
this is going viral on the autoadmit twitter acccount
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  04/07/21
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Galvanic Goal In Life
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They need to swing by St. Louis and pick up Darren Wilson, t...
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I knew this thread was going to be great as soon as I saw it...
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LMAO at this reptile fantasy. Zimmerman walked because ther...
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He walked bc Trayvon was beating the shit out of him like an...
Startled Hall Genital Piercing
  04/07/21
He was lucky nobody saw it go down and lived except him. It...
Fantasy-prone azure national security agency
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no, other ppl saw it and conformed his account sorry, Thu...
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  04/07/21
Lol leave it to some lib retard to shit up a great thread ...
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  04/07/21
"A theam?" Chauvin lisped. "Not just any t...
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  04/07/21
The lib comedian’s mind at work, folks.
cruel-hearted wine nursing home internal respiration
  04/07/21
jesus christ. whatever that was, it was poasted in poor tast...
odious hospital ceo
  04/07/21
Someone spent like 20 minutes of their life on that slop lol
cruel-hearted wine nursing home internal respiration
  04/07/21
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Titillating indirect expression
  04/07/21
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Nubile French Chef Field
  04/11/21
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Embarrassed To The Bone Piazza Jap
  04/11/21
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aqua heaven antidepressant drug
  04/07/21
cringe
swashbuckling pontificating base nibblets
  04/07/21
blank this or have a mod delete it tyia
jet sneaky criminal
  04/07/21
Sad that this absurdly unfunny attempt at lib “humor&r...
cruel-hearted wine nursing home internal respiration
  04/11/21
this is the equivalent of graffiti on the ceiling of the Sis...
Embarrassed To The Bone Piazza Jap
  04/11/21
i'm glad this got poasted. it's a monument to how humorless ...
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  04/11/21
great post
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Immeasurably bad
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  04/12/21
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  04/15/21
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In his dreams
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  07/04/23
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  07/04/23
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  07/04/23
i wonder what chauvin's doing this july 4th
Glassy Multi-colored Puppy
  07/04/23
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Glassy Multi-colored Puppy
  12/09/24
At the other end of the bar a man stares into his mug. At fi...
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OP could be a world-famous author. What's stopping him?
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COCKazn
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Poast new message in this thread



Reply Favorite

Date: April 6th, 2021 2:16 PM
Author: ungodly sapphire laser beams native

Not much of a celebration, he thought. At least now it was over. And at least Clem let him stay in the bar after close. But the bottle of Evan Williams was almost empty. He still didn’t feel like going home though. Nobody would be waiting for him. She’d left a long time ago, and even now he knew, she wouldn’t be coming back. It wasn’t really over.

He didn’t even bother to look up as the door creaked open behind him. Some kid come to take justice into his own hands, he thought. He chuckled.

“I thought I’d find you here. It’s where I’d be.”

Chauvin turned to look at the stranger. A short, portly man. And vaguely familiar. He looked Hispanic—or maybe more white-Hispanic. “What do you want.”

The stranger tipped his head back slightly. “I’m forming a team.”

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4804566&forum_id=2]#42231597)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 7th, 2021 1:39 AM
Author: citrine corn cake



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4804566&forum_id=2]#42235083)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 7th, 2021 12:00 PM
Author: Startled Hall Genital Piercing



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4804566&forum_id=2]#42236423)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 19th, 2021 12:12 PM
Author: Sepia concupiscible love of her life house

Made me smile

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4804566&forum_id=2]#42307248)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 6th, 2021 2:17 PM
Author: Cocky stock car



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4804566&forum_id=2]#42231600)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 6th, 2021 2:17 PM
Author: Ruddy Half-breed Lodge



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4804566&forum_id=2]#42231601)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 6th, 2021 2:18 PM
Author: Domesticated pale ticket booth mexican



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4804566&forum_id=2]#42231602)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 6th, 2021 2:19 PM
Author: adventurous emerald school keepsake machete



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4804566&forum_id=2]#42231604)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 6th, 2021 2:20 PM
Author: aphrodisiac free-loading home reading party



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4804566&forum_id=2]#42231611)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 6th, 2021 2:23 PM
Author: vibrant puce senate kitty cat

He stubbed the Marlboro Light against the bottom of the glass. "Christ," he thought as he realized it was his last. The only problem with these things is they don't kill you fast enough.

Spinning around on his stool, Chauvin sized the man up. So he was forming a team. "You got off one shot," Chauvin mumbled. "Anybody could do that."

"What about three shots?" the voice behind him said. A third person, barely more than a boy, emerged from the shadows. Not much taller than the jukebox he stood next to, his cheeks were still flush with... what caused cheeks to flush? Derek couldnt remember anymore.

"Call me Kyle," the kid said.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4804566&forum_id=2]#42231622)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 6th, 2021 2:24 PM
Author: ungodly sapphire laser beams native



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4804566&forum_id=2]#42231626)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 6th, 2021 2:24 PM
Author: sticky bright theater stage

We have the makings of a blockbuster here fellas. Gotta work Dorner in somehow. Graphic novel.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4804566&forum_id=2]#42231631)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 6th, 2021 3:45 PM
Author: exhilarant brunch depressive

already demand for this movie on twitter:

https://twitter.com/KrangisBack/status/1379518454831677444

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4804566&forum_id=2]#42232143)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 6th, 2021 4:38 PM
Author: aquamarine crotch menage



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4804566&forum_id=2]#42232480)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 7th, 2021 4:42 PM
Author: Titillating indirect expression

ur faggot twitter account is probably going to cause problems for us

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4804566&forum_id=2]#42238429)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 6th, 2021 2:26 PM
Author: exhilarant brunch depressive

180

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4804566&forum_id=2]#42231636)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 6th, 2021 2:41 PM
Author: aphrodisiac free-loading home reading party

I thought this was about Ted Cruz tp

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4804566&forum_id=2]#42231716)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 6th, 2021 2:45 PM
Author: pungent community account

holy motherfucking shit

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4804566&forum_id=2]#42231739)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 6th, 2021 2:52 PM
Author: Brass electric shrine digit ratio



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4804566&forum_id=2]#42231793)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 6th, 2021 2:56 PM
Author: aqua heaven antidepressant drug



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4804566&forum_id=2]#42231835)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 6th, 2021 3:00 PM
Author: Fiercely-loyal cerise locus feces



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4804566&forum_id=2]#42231864)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 6th, 2021 3:00 PM
Author: Spruce boistinker

The bathroom door creaked open and the three men looked at each other, then the doorway. They knew they would be tested, but this soon? Instinctively, they aimed their pieces and readied for a fight.

A shadowy figure, old and bespectacled, emerged into the smoky room. "At ease men."

He ambled up to the bar, sizing up the crew.

"Bernard is the name. You know what's better than three? Four. I've been biding my time since '84, but I've called you here because the team is finally ready."



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4804566&forum_id=2]#42231869)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 6th, 2021 3:08 PM
Author: ungodly sapphire laser beams native

Save Goetz for phase 2. Maybe a fun, neon 80s throwback. Taika Waititi could direct. Or maybe something more with the tone of The Warriors.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4804566&forum_id=2]#42231914)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 6th, 2021 5:34 PM
Author: Spruce boistinker



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4804566&forum_id=2]#42232802)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 7th, 2021 11:51 AM
Author: cruel-hearted wine nursing home internal respiration

Agreed. I’m thinking some flashback origin story for this mysterious secret underground society that starts with Bernie.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4804566&forum_id=2]#42236365)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 7th, 2021 12:11 PM
Author: vibrant puce senate kitty cat



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4804566&forum_id=2]#42236494)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 13th, 2021 8:45 AM
Author: bearded misunderstood old irish cottage jewess



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4804566&forum_id=2]#43434340)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 6th, 2021 3:52 PM
Author: Cocky stock car



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4804566&forum_id=2]#42232198)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 6th, 2021 4:37 PM
Author: aquamarine crotch menage



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4804566&forum_id=2]#42232478)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 6th, 2021 4:39 PM
Author: Lascivious stage gaming laptop



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4804566&forum_id=2]#42232482)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 6th, 2021 4:46 PM
Author: Nubile French Chef Field



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4804566&forum_id=2]#42232514)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 6th, 2021 4:47 PM
Author: sable insecure tank main people



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4804566&forum_id=2]#42232526)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 6th, 2021 4:47 PM
Author: painfully honest church

fuck my ass

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4804566&forum_id=2]#42232527)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 6th, 2021 5:23 PM
Author: Big-titted trailer park really tough guy



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4804566&forum_id=2]#42232745)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 6th, 2021 10:28 PM
Author: bearded misunderstood old irish cottage jewess



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4804566&forum_id=2]#42234236)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 7th, 2021 12:05 AM
Author: wonderful beta bawdyhouse

i *really* like it here

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4804566&forum_id=2]#42234752)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 7th, 2021 12:45 AM
Author: Embarrassed To The Bone Piazza Jap



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4804566&forum_id=2]#42234932)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 7th, 2021 8:26 AM
Author: ungodly sapphire laser beams native

Jesus, they’d roped the Kenosha Kid into this too? “I thought you were supposed to be in jail. Has your trial even started yet?”

“And I thought you were supposed to be a cop. Is this how a cop behaves.”

Derek chuckled again. “Actually, yeah. Pretty much. Besides, I’m not a cop anymore. They took my badge.”

“They take your balls too?”

“Kyle, enough!” the portly man snapped. His eyes narrowed on Derek. “It wasn’t your badge they took—it was theirs. They just lent it to you. And it wasn’t what made you a cop. Take it from us, you don’t need a badge to be a hero. Cop or no, there are still bad guys out there. One in particular.”

“Oh yeah?” Derek smirked. Heroes? Bad guys? This guy was as crazy as they said on TV. “And what did this bad guy do?”

“Nothing. That’s just the thing. He didn’t do nothing.”

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4804566&forum_id=2]#42235475)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 7th, 2021 9:26 AM
Author: vibrant puce senate kitty cat

Chauvin turned the bottle of hooch on its side on the bar top. It lay there, like some con waiting for the bracelets. Grimacing he gave it a spin. His fate had been decided by wilder things, he figured. Why not this. Bottle points at the bar, here he would stay. Clem wouldnt even mind if he slept in the backroom. Bottle points out the door... well. Things might get interesting.

The bottle nose, snub and silent, spun until it found its final resting place -- pointing right out the double doors of Clem's joint. The Minneapolis streets, still wet. So this was it. He would go with them.

He stuck his mitts into his pockets. Didn't want anyone to see them trembling. Especially not the kid. Christ, the kid was young. The trembling continued. It was the drink, Chauvin told himself. Just the drink, not nerves.

The three cut an unlikely figure as they stepped into the streets. Chauvin looked for their ride. But there was no heap anywhere. He heard a rustling from underneath the streetlight around the corner, on Price. They led that way and he followed.

"You ready?" the fat one said.

"Horses?" Chauvin blinked.

Some litter rolled past their feet, blown ragged in the wind. A burger wrapper. Down the block a streetlight fizzed out.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4804566&forum_id=2]#42235675)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 7th, 2021 11:27 AM
Author: aquamarine crotch menage



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4804566&forum_id=2]#42236225)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 7th, 2021 4:20 PM
Author: charcoal striped hyena yarmulke



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4804566&forum_id=2]#42238278)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 19th, 2021 12:03 PM
Author: vibrant puce senate kitty cat



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4804566&forum_id=2]#42307154)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 13th, 2021 8:38 AM
Author: vibrant puce senate kitty cat



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4804566&forum_id=2]#43434311)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 13th, 2021 8:47 AM
Author: bearded misunderstood old irish cottage jewess



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4804566&forum_id=2]#43434346)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 16th, 2023 1:23 PM
Author: trip salmon office



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4804566&forum_id=2]#46553569)



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Date: June 9th, 2026 3:44 PM
Author: cell phones



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4804566&forum_id=2]#49925760)



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Date: July 4th, 2023 12:16 PM
Author: Cheese-eating frum station



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4804566&forum_id=2]#46508236)



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Date: May 21st, 2025 11:11 AM
Author: Infuriating territorial chad



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4804566&forum_id=2]#48950589)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 7th, 2021 12:00 PM
Author: Startled Hall Genital Piercing



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4804566&forum_id=2]#42236426)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 7th, 2021 12:11 PM
Author: Big Ultramarine Shitlib



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4804566&forum_id=2]#42236487)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 7th, 2021 2:16 PM
Author: Insane stirring stage

180

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4804566&forum_id=2]#42237382)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 7th, 2021 4:32 PM
Author: Galvanic Goal In Life

lol

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4804566&forum_id=2]#42238363)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 15th, 2021 12:16 PM
Author: rough-skinned sick elastic band boltzmann



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4804566&forum_id=2]#42284715)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 13th, 2021 8:36 AM
Author: vibrant puce senate kitty cat



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4804566&forum_id=2]#43434306)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 13th, 2021 8:44 AM
Author: bearded misunderstood old irish cottage jewess



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4804566&forum_id=2]#43434336)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 4th, 2023 11:29 AM
Author: Mewling regret



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4804566&forum_id=2]#46508092)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 4th, 2023 11:31 AM
Author: Fear-inspiring Marvelous Pisswyrm



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4804566&forum_id=2]#46508106)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 16th, 2023 1:18 PM
Author: trip salmon office



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4804566&forum_id=2]#46553558)



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Date: November 24th, 2023 10:01 PM
Author: trip salmon office



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4804566&forum_id=2]#47095417)



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Date: December 9th, 2024 11:38 AM
Author: out-of-control lilac cumskin plaza



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4804566&forum_id=2]#48428177)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 9th, 2026 3:41 PM
Author: cell phones



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4804566&forum_id=2]#49925748)



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Date: April 6th, 2021 2:24 PM
Author: primrose passionate university



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4804566&forum_id=2]#42231628)



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Date: April 6th, 2021 2:24 PM
Author: Supple whorehouse famous landscape painting



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4804566&forum_id=2]#42231629)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 6th, 2021 2:24 PM
Author: exhilarant brunch depressive

180

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4804566&forum_id=2]#42231633)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 6th, 2021 2:38 PM
Author: Dun step-uncle's house pozpig



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4804566&forum_id=2]#42231694)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 6th, 2021 2:40 PM
Author: Dull naked parlour travel guidebook

great thread

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4804566&forum_id=2]#42231709)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 6th, 2021 2:42 PM
Author: Balding Fanboi Affirmative Action



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4804566&forum_id=2]#42231720)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 6th, 2021 2:44 PM
Author: Thriller Liquid Oxygen Orchestra Pit



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4804566&forum_id=2]#42231733)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 6th, 2021 2:55 PM
Author: cerebral mint cuck



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4804566&forum_id=2]#42231829)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 6th, 2021 3:20 PM
Author: Comical area dragon



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4804566&forum_id=2]#42231989)



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Date: April 6th, 2021 4:46 PM
Author: Nubile French Chef Field



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4804566&forum_id=2]#42232516)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 6th, 2021 10:48 PM
Author: exhilarant brunch depressive



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4804566&forum_id=2]#42234354)



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Date: April 7th, 2021 4:37 PM
Author: jet sneaky criminal



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4804566&forum_id=2]#42238401)



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Date: April 6th, 2021 2:42 PM
Author: Fiercely-loyal cerise locus feces



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4804566&forum_id=2]#42231723)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 6th, 2021 2:43 PM
Author: Twinkling Vivacious Potus Tanning Salon



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4804566&forum_id=2]#42231727)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 6th, 2021 2:44 PM
Author: Flushed gay wizard principal's office



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4804566&forum_id=2]#42231732)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 6th, 2021 2:46 PM
Author: Henna Weed Whacker Casino



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4804566&forum_id=2]#42231747)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 6th, 2021 2:48 PM
Author: Opaque set macaca

New New Hollywood

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4804566&forum_id=2]#42231759)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 6th, 2021 4:28 PM
Author: Lime apoplectic stag film

.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4804566&forum_id=2]#42232441)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 6th, 2021 2:48 PM
Author: floppy space



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4804566&forum_id=2]#42231766)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 6th, 2021 2:49 PM
Author: charcoal striped hyena yarmulke



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4804566&forum_id=2]#42231768)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 6th, 2021 2:49 PM
Author: Spruce boistinker



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4804566&forum_id=2]#42231774)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 6th, 2021 3:35 PM
Author: Iridescent Ape Lettuce

To be fair,

"Look fellas, I'm really not in the mood for any of this crap, OK?" Chauvin growled in a low voice, swiftly motioning for Clem to come grab his card. "I'm out of that game. Done. Sure, I had my moment, and sure, it was good and fun while it lasted... but it's over now. It's over, and I'm -- I'm just old and alone."

It wasn't until Clem drew near that Chauvin realized something seemed oddly different about him tonight. Even in the dim light, his dark eyes seemed to twinkle behind his thick spectacles, and an almost imperceptible smirk seemed to light up his otherwise sallow and sagging face. He leaned forward and clasped Chauvin's shoulder with his left hand as he slammed another shot of whiskey down on the bar with his right.

"And what exactly's wrong with 'old and alone', partner? Look, your money's no good in here tonight. I don't need your $5 -- I've still got my own, after all."

"Clem, I can't, you know I don-"

"Name's not really Clem, brother," the aged barhand murmured softly, winking mischievously at the two other men standing behind Chauvin as he squeezed Chauvin's shoulder in an oddly paternal manner. "And now that you've Seen Kyle, hurry up and take that shot -- you don't look too bad, so have another. We've got a lot to discuss and we need to 'Goetz going,' heh."

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4804566&forum_id=2]#42232094)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 6th, 2021 3:54 PM
Author: Titillating indirect expression



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4804566&forum_id=2]#42232217)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 6th, 2021 10:28 PM
Author: bearded misunderstood old irish cottage jewess



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4804566&forum_id=2]#42234238)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 13th, 2021 8:48 AM
Author: bearded misunderstood old irish cottage jewess



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4804566&forum_id=2]#43434347)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 6th, 2021 3:55 PM
Author: Rose Hominid



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4804566&forum_id=2]#42232225)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 6th, 2021 4:34 PM
Author: aquamarine crotch menage



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4804566&forum_id=2]#42232466)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 6th, 2021 4:40 PM
Author: nighttime masturbator



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4804566&forum_id=2]#42232486)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 6th, 2021 4:45 PM
Author: out-of-control lilac cumskin plaza

this is vintage xo greatness i haven't seen in some time

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4804566&forum_id=2]#42232502)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 6th, 2021 9:28 PM
Author: Spruce boistinker



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4804566&forum_id=2]#42233933)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 6th, 2021 10:04 PM
Author: trip salmon office



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4804566&forum_id=2]#42234112)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 6th, 2021 11:51 PM
Author: Titillating indirect expression



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4804566&forum_id=2]#42234680)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 6th, 2021 11:54 PM
Author: bearded misunderstood old irish cottage jewess



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4804566&forum_id=2]#42234694)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 7th, 2021 12:07 AM
Author: wonderful beta bawdyhouse

this is going viral on the autoadmit twitter acccount

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4804566&forum_id=2]#42234764)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 7th, 2021 1:53 PM
Author: excitant drab patrolman karate



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4804566&forum_id=2]#42237223)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 7th, 2021 4:33 PM
Author: Galvanic Goal In Life



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4804566&forum_id=2]#42238370)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 6th, 2021 4:45 PM
Author: Mustard irradiated blood rage abode



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4804566&forum_id=2]#42232511)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 6th, 2021 5:23 PM
Author: Big-titted trailer park really tough guy



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4804566&forum_id=2]#42232739)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 6th, 2021 10:28 PM
Author: bearded misunderstood old irish cottage jewess



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4804566&forum_id=2]#42234239)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 7th, 2021 12:02 AM
Author: pea-brained pearly locale



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4804566&forum_id=2]#42234738)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 7th, 2021 12:12 AM
Author: disgusting institution

They need to swing by St. Louis and pick up Darren Wilson, the OG.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4804566&forum_id=2]#42234786)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 7th, 2021 12:46 AM
Author: Embarrassed To The Bone Piazza Jap

I knew this thread was going to be great as soon as I saw it on the front page

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4804566&forum_id=2]#42234934)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 7th, 2021 1:39 AM
Author: citrine corn cake



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4804566&forum_id=2]#42235085)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 7th, 2021 9:27 AM
Author: Razzle translucent codepig



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4804566&forum_id=2]#42235683)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 7th, 2021 11:30 AM
Author: odious hospital ceo



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4804566&forum_id=2]#42236233)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 7th, 2021 11:47 AM
Author: shaky heady forum quadroon



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4804566&forum_id=2]#42236344)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 7th, 2021 11:56 AM
Author: slimy glittery parlor circlehead



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4804566&forum_id=2]#42236398)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 7th, 2021 11:58 AM
Author: Fantasy-prone azure national security agency

LMAO at this reptile fantasy. Zimmerman walked because there was no video and there were no eyewitnesses.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4804566&forum_id=2]#42236409)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 7th, 2021 12:03 PM
Author: Startled Hall Genital Piercing

He walked bc Trayvon was beating the shit out of him like an ape

https://www.cnn.com/2012/12/03/justice/george-zimmerman-photo/index.html

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4804566&forum_id=2]#42236435)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 7th, 2021 12:07 PM
Author: Fantasy-prone azure national security agency

He was lucky nobody saw it go down and lived except him. It's that simple.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4804566&forum_id=2]#42236463)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 7th, 2021 4:35 PM
Author: wonderful beta bawdyhouse

no, other ppl saw it and conformed his account

sorry, Thugvon and Floyd weren't the saints the media told you they were

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4804566&forum_id=2]#42238390)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 7th, 2021 2:06 PM
Author: swashbuckling pontificating base nibblets

Lol leave it to some lib retard to shit up a great thread

Zimmerman walked because the stupid nigger kid chimped out and got got

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4804566&forum_id=2]#42237310)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 13th, 2021 9:29 AM
Author: poppy garrison



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4804566&forum_id=2]#43434427)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 7th, 2021 12:01 PM
Author: Sienna talking hissy fit dysfunction



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4804566&forum_id=2]#42236427)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 7th, 2021 1:51 PM
Author: Angry provocative fat ankles

"A theam?" Chauvin lisped.

"Not just any team, a soccer team!" bellowed the rotund Hispanian.

*shoves soccer ball into Chauvins abdomen*

*Chauvin yields, gasping for air, winded and grounded*

"We've been to every fag joint in town and gathered the most virile gays. But you Chauvin--you will be our shining star!"

Silhouettes of towering lardos slowly emerged from Chauvin's peripheral vision as he peered towards the heavens.

"Y-You're here to help?" cried Chauvin. "I can't breathe..."

"Yes, we are here...to help. Where we're going, we don't need air to breathe!"

"Three, two, one, STIM!"

Volleys of what appeared to be a viscous white liquid started gushing from all angles. Our hero Chauvin could no longer hear or see or think...or breathe. The liquid drowned the room. 'This is it' he thought. 'This is...the end'

And in a flash, Chauvin snapped awake from his nightmare. "Thank god its over!" Chauvin let out an exasperated laugh.

"I don't remember my bedroom being white. Wait, this room isn't white!"

He gathered himself and started feeling out his environs. It went completely around. "This is, this is, this is a tube! And--and..."

He moved his hand away from his eyes, as it faded into nothingness. "The white is the fluid? Am I breathing this fluid?"

He launched himself at the walls of the tube. He could finally see beyond. "Another tube? Another, like me? No, wait this one...this one is different!"

The fleshy silhouette inside the adjacent tube slowly bounced towards Chauvin. A silhouette gained clarity as something otherworldly, imprinted into his eyes for eternity. Horror show.

"A buttocks on one end, and a tongue on another."

A familiar voice. The Hispanian!

"...one of my earlier experiments."

The fleshy abomination stopped moving and pointed its tonguehole towards our hero. "I aM PeTeRMaN. YoU WiLL LeArN tO LoVe mE! LoVvVvVvVvVe mE!" It rotated asswise and let off a loudening hiss. Impeding doom. The tongue-buttocks began violently gyrating, then in a few split moments, it grew tenfold in size and exploded. A slurry of satanic entrails and parasites painted the adjacent tube entirely red. Most appeared to be harvested mechanically, whatever was left, slowly coalesced. Coalesced back into another otherworldly tongue-buttocks.

"This is how gays reproduce. How do you expect to form a soccer team if gays cannot reproduce? We would only have two players! You need at least seven for a team you stupid gringo!" The Hispanian sighs. "God you're stupid!"

The adrenaline is wearing off. Reality sets in. Encased in a crystal prison, entombed by gallons of semen. Tubes inserted into every orifice. Rainbow suspenders. A 24/7 Drilldo massage. A switch is flicked and everything is now pitch black. Pitch black except for the rows and rows of seemingly infinite bioluminescent tongue-buttocks bouncing off the tube walls in perpetuity. Chauvin hears footsteps of a man walking away. He smiles. "The metamorphosis has just begun!"



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4804566&forum_id=2]#42237213)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 7th, 2021 2:02 PM
Author: cruel-hearted wine nursing home internal respiration

The lib comedian’s mind at work, folks.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4804566&forum_id=2]#42237293)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 7th, 2021 2:07 PM
Author: odious hospital ceo

jesus christ. whatever that was, it was poasted in poor taste.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4804566&forum_id=2]#42237317)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 7th, 2021 3:48 PM
Author: cruel-hearted wine nursing home internal respiration

Someone spent like 20 minutes of their life on that slop lol

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4804566&forum_id=2]#42238102)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 7th, 2021 4:44 PM
Author: Titillating indirect expression



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4804566&forum_id=2]#42238444)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 11th, 2021 4:19 PM
Author: Nubile French Chef Field



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4804566&forum_id=2]#42259737)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 11th, 2021 6:48 PM
Author: Embarrassed To The Bone Piazza Jap



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4804566&forum_id=2]#42260448)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 7th, 2021 10:44 PM
Author: aqua heaven antidepressant drug



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4804566&forum_id=2]#42240189)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 7th, 2021 2:07 PM
Author: swashbuckling pontificating base nibblets

cringe

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4804566&forum_id=2]#42237316)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 7th, 2021 4:39 PM
Author: jet sneaky criminal

blank this or have a mod delete it tyia

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4804566&forum_id=2]#42238417)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 11th, 2021 3:04 PM
Author: cruel-hearted wine nursing home internal respiration

Sad that this absurdly unfunny attempt at lib “humor” may have had its intended effect and killed an otherwise 180 thread.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4804566&forum_id=2]#42259354)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 11th, 2021 6:49 PM
Author: Embarrassed To The Bone Piazza Jap

this is the equivalent of graffiti on the ceiling of the Sistine Chapel

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4804566&forum_id=2]#42260458)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 11th, 2021 7:00 PM
Author: out-of-control lilac cumskin plaza

i'm glad this got poasted. it's a monument to how humorless libs are.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4804566&forum_id=2]#42260528)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 15th, 2021 12:14 PM
Author: olive coffee pot

great post

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4804566&forum_id=2]#42284699)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 4th, 2023 12:18 PM
Author: Cheese-eating frum station

Immeasurably bad

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4804566&forum_id=2]#46508245)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 12th, 2021 11:21 PM
Author: bearded misunderstood old irish cottage jewess



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4804566&forum_id=2]#42268422)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 15th, 2021 12:12 PM
Author: vibrant puce senate kitty cat



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4804566&forum_id=2]#42284689)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 20th, 2021 5:00 PM
Author: vibrant puce senate kitty cat



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4804566&forum_id=2]#42316518)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 19th, 2021 1:47 PM
Author: vibrant puce senate kitty cat



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4804566&forum_id=2]#43472264)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 19th, 2021 4:17 PM
Author: bearded misunderstood old irish cottage jewess



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4804566&forum_id=2]#43473939)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 6th, 2021 6:34 AM
Author: bearded misunderstood old irish cottage jewess



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4804566&forum_id=2]#43566106)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 6th, 2021 7:09 AM
Author: vibrant puce senate kitty cat



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4804566&forum_id=2]#43566125)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 7th, 2022 5:32 PM
Author: grizzly appetizing juggernaut



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4804566&forum_id=2]#44811607)



Reply Favorite

Date: May 3rd, 2023 8:55 PM
Author: Titillating indirect expression



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4804566&forum_id=2]#46267399)



Reply Favorite

Date: May 3rd, 2023 8:56 PM
Author: Internet-worthy bateful theater turdskin

In his dreams

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4804566&forum_id=2]#46267404)



Reply Favorite

Date: May 3rd, 2023 8:58 PM
Author: aquamarine crotch menage



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4804566&forum_id=2]#46267414)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 4th, 2023 11:28 AM
Author: Mewling regret



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4804566&forum_id=2]#46508089)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 4th, 2023 11:30 AM
Author: Fear-inspiring Marvelous Pisswyrm



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4804566&forum_id=2]#46508100)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 4th, 2023 11:35 AM
Author: Aromatic Cyan Volcanic Crater Den



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4804566&forum_id=2]#46508121)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 4th, 2023 12:19 PM
Author: Glassy Multi-colored Puppy

i wonder what chauvin's doing this july 4th

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4804566&forum_id=2]#46508248)



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Date: December 9th, 2024 11:39 AM
Author: Glassy Multi-colored Puppy



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4804566&forum_id=2]#48428185)



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Date: December 9th, 2024 11:36 AM
Author: vibrant puce senate kitty cat

At the other end of the bar a man stares into his mug. At first it sounds like he is mumbling or humming, another loon, another broken soul, but soon words can be discerned, even in this racket.... He is singing.

"From the hills of Montezuma..."

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4804566&forum_id=2]#48428157)



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Date: December 9th, 2024 11:38 AM
Author: out-of-control lilac cumskin plaza



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4804566&forum_id=2]#48428168)



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Date: December 9th, 2024 11:38 AM
Author: burgundy shivering pocket flask business firm



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4804566&forum_id=2]#48428175)



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Date: December 9th, 2024 11:41 AM
Author: Insane stirring stage

OP could be a world-famous author. What's stopping him?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4804566&forum_id=2]#48428201)



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Date: June 9th, 2026 3:52 PM
Author: Emotionally + Physically Abusive Ex-Husband (oppose bitchbois)



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4804566&forum_id=2]#49925796)



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Date: May 21st, 2025 11:09 AM
Author: Infuriating territorial chad



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4804566&forum_id=2]#48950586)



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Date: May 21st, 2025 11:14 AM
Author: charcoal striped hyena yarmulke



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4804566&forum_id=2]#48950596)



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Date: June 9th, 2026 3:49 PM
Author: COCKazn (✅🍑)



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4804566&forum_id=2]#49925779)