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very sad (or sick!) to see shitlib women furiously masturbate to Handmaid's Tale

ohhhhh i can't believe how timely this is what a warning to ...
Vibrant rebellious piazza cuckoldry
  04/30/18
lmfao
Big lay affirmative action
  04/30/18
Its like some William Faulkner level stream of conciousness
umber violent macaca ticket booth
  04/30/18
...
Adventurous athletic conference meetinghouse
  06/09/19
...
talented aggressive parlor really tough guy
  10/13/20
...
Black diverse lodge goal in life
  10/28/21
...
lascivious rehab
  04/30/18
...
arousing hyperventilating kitty cat
  04/30/18
WOKE AS FUK
medicated locale
  04/30/18
...
bearded charismatic school cafeteria ape
  06/24/18
this is scholarship of the highest order. you are now Sir Ri...
Obsidian giraffe karate
  06/24/18
...
Honey-headed anal bawdyhouse
  06/24/18
...
mauve scourge upon the earth
  06/24/18
...
ultramarine gaping
  10/28/21
180 Joyce
Awkward Hissy Fit
  06/24/18
unadulterated 180
Crystalline Stag Film Trump Supporter
  06/24/18
...
Bipolar aphrodisiac turdskin
  06/24/18
...
Fragrant plaza
  06/24/18
"Binders full of women" in latest episode not flam...
Vibrant rebellious piazza cuckoldry
  06/09/19
YUP. It’s like they got bored of Trump references (...
Adventurous athletic conference meetinghouse
  06/09/19
...
bespoke brunch sex offender
  06/09/19
this OP is seriously a masterpiece
Big lay affirmative action
  06/09/19
...
talented aggressive parlor really tough guy
  06/09/19
...
talented aggressive parlor really tough guy
  12/01/21
...
DrakeMallardxo
  08/24/25
i'm guessing OP's name IRL is jonah
Frum Stage Elastic Band
  06/09/19
this has aged exceedingly well
Crystalline Stag Film Trump Supporter
  06/09/19
...
Adventurous athletic conference meetinghouse
  06/09/19
...
talented aggressive parlor really tough guy
  06/10/19
...
Twisted concupiscible spot
  06/10/19
you're playing to your audience, fine, but this is clearly w...
Thirsty field
  06/10/19
cr. "cock," "pound." but sometimes u ju...
swashbuckling claret church building french chef
  06/10/19
pure praise would mean his talent has nowhere else to go her...
Thirsty field
  06/10/19
...
talented aggressive parlor really tough guy
  06/10/19
18000
Aqua Trailer Park
  06/10/19
megan mcardle i think had a good column on how ridiculous th...
appetizing pisswyrm travel guidebook
  06/10/19
John Dolan wrote the GOAT POTUS review... twenty years ago. ...
odious stead cumskin
  06/10/19
Holy shit, this is great "Handmaid’s Tale is mea...
Dark trust fund
  06/10/19
also lol @ VCR.
odious stead cumskin
  06/10/19
This was written in 2000, but it fits in seamlessly with xo ...
Dark trust fund
  06/10/19
This guy is an XO Ted level visionary
Twisted concupiscible spot
  06/10/19
...
Narrow-minded keepsake machete
  06/10/19
...
Twisted concupiscible spot
  06/10/19
lol, whoa
Narrow-minded keepsake machete
  06/10/19
holy shit "And in the meantime, what has Atwood&rsqu...
Narrow-minded keepsake machete
  06/10/19
...
talented aggressive parlor really tough guy
  06/10/19
...
Twisted concupiscible spot
  06/10/19
whoa cr
Domesticated buck-toothed mood set
  06/10/19
...
Cerebral talking theater stage partner
  06/10/19
this is an amazing article
swashbuckling claret church building french chef
  01/23/20
!!!
ultramarine gaping
  10/28/21
"wretched office-worker who goes home to a cat" ...
Yellow mind-boggling house
  06/10/19
...
Cerebral talking theater stage partner
  06/10/19
“No one wants to force middle-class American women to ...
Twisted concupiscible spot
  06/10/19
The eXile was an early dose of REDPILL for me even though th...
odious stead cumskin
  06/10/19
...
Narrow-minded keepsake machete
  06/10/19
whoah
swashbuckling claret church building french chef
  06/10/19
...
thriller pontificating principal's office digit ratio
  06/10/19
holy shit
Domesticated buck-toothed mood set
  06/10/19
holy fuck
Big lay affirmative action
  06/10/19
Cot damn
talented aggressive parlor really tough guy
  06/10/19
...
Passionate Gold Pozpig
  05/09/21
!!!
ultramarine gaping
  10/28/21
this is scholarship
beady-eyed avocado gay wizard tank
  10/24/24
fatality
walnut electric boiling water school
  06/10/19
...
bespoke brunch sex offender
  06/10/19
Does this guy have any thoughts on MAGA?
Adventurous athletic conference meetinghouse
  06/15/19
...
disturbing state
  10/28/21
...
ultramarine gaping
  10/28/21
this is so damn good I'm copy pasting the whole thing: THE ...
disturbing state
  10/28/21
Lmao is this really the story of the show?
Nighttime Cyan Clown
  06/10/19
...
Awkward Hissy Fit
  06/10/19
...
Duck-like laughsome deer antler orchestra pit
  06/10/19
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  06/10/19
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talented aggressive parlor really tough guy
  01/23/20
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bespoke brunch sex offender
  01/23/20
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Sienna Cracking Bbw
  01/23/20
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talented aggressive parlor really tough guy
  12/01/21
...
Domesticated buck-toothed mood set
  12/01/21
...
stirring yapping garrison community account
  12/01/21
This and the "inside a lady's head" one are like b...
crimson codepig
  07/01/22
...
crimson codepig
  10/01/23
...
crimson codepig
  02/20/24
...
crimson codepig
  10/24/24


Poast new message in this thread



Reply Favorite

Date: April 30th, 2018 11:23 AM
Author: Vibrant rebellious piazza cuckoldry

ohhhhh i can't believe how timely this is what a warning to women trying to survive in trump's america so many parallels to modern america i'd never let something like that happen jonah and i already have plans to run away to canada i'd get right in those soldiers faces and tell them they can't oppress my body of course they would try to force me to be a handmaid a very powerful commander would claim me and his wife would not be as hot as me but i'd struggle i'd struggle oh yes even though they would overpower me and he'd ravage me with his big commander cock he'd pound me and pound me and there'd be nothing i could do oh no oh no but i'd scratch and claw except his wife would hold me down that bitch she'd resent me for making him cum in my womb and give him beautiful children he'd sneak me goodies and treats and show me off at jezebels that sick patriarchal bastard but jonah wouldn't be able to find me i'd have to move on and be strong and live for me and my children and eventually i'd seduce the commander so good that he helps me become his real wife and we'd have the power then so i could help people fuck trump for trying to put this in practice pretty much an owners manual for him and pence those fuckers they'll never get to fuck me

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2#35949672)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 30th, 2018 11:28 AM
Author: Big lay affirmative action

lmfao

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2#35949690)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 30th, 2018 11:30 AM
Author: umber violent macaca ticket booth

Its like some William Faulkner level stream of conciousness

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2#35949706)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 9th, 2019 11:28 PM
Author: Adventurous athletic conference meetinghouse



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2#38365108)



Reply Favorite

Date: October 13th, 2020 12:49 PM
Author: talented aggressive parlor really tough guy



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2#41103220)



Reply Favorite

Date: October 28th, 2021 5:28 AM
Author: Black diverse lodge goal in life



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2#43342786)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 30th, 2018 11:31 AM
Author: lascivious rehab



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2#35949712)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 30th, 2018 11:33 AM
Author: arousing hyperventilating kitty cat



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2#35949736)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 30th, 2018 11:35 AM
Author: medicated locale

WOKE AS FUK

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2#35949749)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 24th, 2018 7:47 PM
Author: bearded charismatic school cafeteria ape



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2#36303022)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 24th, 2018 7:48 PM
Author: Obsidian giraffe karate

this is scholarship of the highest order. you are now Sir Risten.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2#36303030)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 24th, 2018 7:50 PM
Author: Honey-headed anal bawdyhouse



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2#36303036)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 24th, 2018 7:56 PM
Author: mauve scourge upon the earth



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2#36303065)



Reply Favorite

Date: October 28th, 2021 12:18 AM
Author: ultramarine gaping



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2#43342024)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 24th, 2018 7:53 PM
Author: Awkward Hissy Fit

180 Joyce

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2#36303053)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 24th, 2018 7:57 PM
Author: Crystalline Stag Film Trump Supporter

unadulterated 180

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2#36303071)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 24th, 2018 7:58 PM
Author: Bipolar aphrodisiac turdskin



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2#36303081)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 24th, 2018 8:05 PM
Author: Fragrant plaza



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2#36303131)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 9th, 2019 10:31 PM
Author: Vibrant rebellious piazza cuckoldry

"Binders full of women" in latest episode not flame

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2#38364783)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 9th, 2019 11:29 PM
Author: Adventurous athletic conference meetinghouse

YUP.

It’s like they got bored of Trump references (did you also catch the lesbian refugee demanding not to be separated from the unrelated infant she was carrying?) and so decided to throw in a Romney dig for old time’s sake.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2#38365120)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 9th, 2019 10:32 PM
Author: bespoke brunch sex offender



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2#38364791)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 9th, 2019 10:36 PM
Author: Big lay affirmative action

this OP is seriously a masterpiece

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2#38364811)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 9th, 2019 10:40 PM
Author: talented aggressive parlor really tough guy



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2#38364852)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 1st, 2021 2:31 PM
Author: talented aggressive parlor really tough guy



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2#43540325)



Reply Favorite

Date: August 24th, 2025 11:59 AM
Author: DrakeMallardxo (🦆)



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2#49208954)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 9th, 2019 10:39 PM
Author: Frum Stage Elastic Band

i'm guessing OP's name IRL is jonah

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2#38364835)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 9th, 2019 10:52 PM
Author: Crystalline Stag Film Trump Supporter

this has aged exceedingly well

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2#38364924)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 9th, 2019 11:30 PM
Author: Adventurous athletic conference meetinghouse



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2#38365122)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 10th, 2019 12:01 PM
Author: talented aggressive parlor really tough guy



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2#38366924)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 10th, 2019 3:40 PM
Author: Twisted concupiscible spot



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2#38368355)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 10th, 2019 12:05 PM
Author: Thirsty field

you're playing to your audience, fine, but this is clearly written by a man

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2#38366957)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 10th, 2019 3:33 PM
Author: swashbuckling claret church building french chef

cr. "cock," "pound." but sometimes u just let it slide you know?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2#38368292)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 10th, 2019 4:34 PM
Author: Thirsty field

pure praise would mean his talent has nowhere else to go here

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2#38368687)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 10th, 2019 3:16 PM
Author: talented aggressive parlor really tough guy



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2#38368206)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 10th, 2019 3:28 PM
Author: Aqua Trailer Park

18000

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2#38368272)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 10th, 2019 3:29 PM
Author: appetizing pisswyrm travel guidebook

megan mcardle i think had a good column on how ridiculous the handmaid's tale is happening! meme is

https://www.bloomberg.com/opinion/articles/2017-04-25/no-the-handmaid-s-tale-is-not-unexpectedly-timely

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2#38368275)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 10th, 2019 3:33 PM
Author: odious stead cumskin

John Dolan wrote the GOAT POTUS review... twenty years ago.

http://exiledonline.com/old-exile/vault/books/review103.html

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2#38368294)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 10th, 2019 3:37 PM
Author: Dark trust fund

Holy shit, this is great

"Handmaid’s Tale is meant to reassure every wretched office-worker who goes home to a cat, a VCR, and Pizza-for-one that her life is noble and progressive."

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2#38368320)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 10th, 2019 3:38 PM
Author: odious stead cumskin

also lol @ VCR.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2#38368327)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 10th, 2019 3:42 PM
Author: Dark trust fund

This was written in 2000, but it fits in seamlessly with xo themes on GC and shrewdom. A true visionary.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2#38368374)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 10th, 2019 3:47 PM
Author: Twisted concupiscible spot

This guy is an XO Ted level visionary

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2#38368393)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 10th, 2019 3:48 PM
Author: Narrow-minded keepsake machete



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2#38368400)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 10th, 2019 3:41 PM
Author: Twisted concupiscible spot



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2#38368361)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 10th, 2019 3:42 PM
Author: Narrow-minded keepsake machete

lol, whoa

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2#38368367)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 10th, 2019 3:44 PM
Author: Narrow-minded keepsake machete

holy shit

"And in the meantime, what has Atwood’s Utopia done, in real political terms? It has managed to distract a whole generation of Americanized women from the real fear and awful loneliness of their office lives. In this way, Atwood’s Canada of the Spirit is, like its real-world counterpart, the good-cop tool, the quaking valet of its Vampire master, America. Atwood’s Canada offers no answer to the Americanized women whose only family is Allie MacBeal and her friends. After all, they’re not rednecks, they’re not Fundamentalists. In fact, the horrible lives of every woman who tries to live out Allie MacBeal is rendered noble by reading Handmaid’s Tale. "

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2#38368382)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 10th, 2019 3:45 PM
Author: talented aggressive parlor really tough guy



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2#38368388)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 10th, 2019 3:46 PM
Author: Twisted concupiscible spot



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2#38368391)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 10th, 2019 4:11 PM
Author: Domesticated buck-toothed mood set

whoa cr

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2#38368548)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 10th, 2019 5:01 PM
Author: Cerebral talking theater stage partner



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2#38368821)



Reply Favorite

Date: January 23rd, 2020 10:16 AM
Author: swashbuckling claret church building french chef

this is an amazing article

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2#39475589)



Reply Favorite

Date: October 28th, 2021 12:14 AM
Author: ultramarine gaping

!!!

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2#43341991)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 10th, 2019 3:47 PM
Author: Yellow mind-boggling house

"wretched office-worker who goes home to a cat"

imo this guy should get credit for identifying the modern shrew

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2#38368399)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 10th, 2019 4:59 PM
Author: Cerebral talking theater stage partner



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2#38368816)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 10th, 2019 3:45 PM
Author: Twisted concupiscible spot

“No one wants to force middle-class American women to have babies. In fact, it’s almost impossible for them to contemplate having kids, because they’re terrified that it might set them back in their careers, and their rivals in the adjacent cubicles would grab their parking spaces and health plans. Nobody wants to use their bodies. That’s precisely the horror with which they live: no one wants to mate with them because in their world, every single striver must fear every other, and the sort of joint action involved in mating and rearing one’s young is impossible—laughable, a thing which only those who have abandoned the hope of A Career can contemplate. So in their minds, mating and rearing children moves down in class, becoming a thing for rednecks and (though they’ll never say this part out loud) immigrants-of-col”

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2#38368389)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 10th, 2019 3:47 PM
Author: odious stead cumskin

The eXile was an early dose of REDPILL for me even though the writes are all lefty degenerates.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2#38368394)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 10th, 2019 3:47 PM
Author: Narrow-minded keepsake machete



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2#38368397)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 10th, 2019 3:58 PM
Author: swashbuckling claret church building french chef

whoah

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2#38368476)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 10th, 2019 4:09 PM
Author: thriller pontificating principal's office digit ratio



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2#38368537)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 10th, 2019 4:12 PM
Author: Domesticated buck-toothed mood set

holy shit

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2#38368558)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 10th, 2019 4:46 PM
Author: Big lay affirmative action

holy fuck

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2#38368731)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 10th, 2019 5:28 PM
Author: talented aggressive parlor really tough guy

Cot damn

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2#38368965)



Reply Favorite

Date: May 9th, 2021 3:27 PM
Author: Passionate Gold Pozpig



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2#42430424)



Reply Favorite

Date: October 28th, 2021 12:15 AM
Author: ultramarine gaping

!!!

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2#43341997)



Reply Favorite

Date: October 24th, 2024 11:17 PM
Author: beady-eyed avocado gay wizard tank

this is scholarship

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2#48237594)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 10th, 2019 4:05 PM
Author: walnut electric boiling water school

fatality

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2#38368513)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 10th, 2019 5:56 PM
Author: bespoke brunch sex offender



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2#38369105)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 15th, 2019 2:37 PM
Author: Adventurous athletic conference meetinghouse

Does this guy have any thoughts on MAGA?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2#38393148)



Reply Favorite

Date: October 28th, 2021 12:05 AM
Author: disturbing state



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2#43341948)



Reply Favorite

Date: October 28th, 2021 12:15 AM
Author: ultramarine gaping



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2#43342001)



Reply Favorite

Date: October 28th, 2021 3:46 AM
Author: disturbing state

this is so damn good I'm copy pasting the whole thing:

THE WINNER OF THE MARK DAVID CHAPMAN LITERARY PRIZE:

#1: Canadian Women ou Les Hoes Canucqois

By John Dolan

Just as I was finishing this column naming Margaret Atwood the Queen of Dunces, I heard she’d won this year’s Booker Prize. Once again, the mainstream press tries to scoop the eXile! There must be a leak somewhere in our ranks. Luckily, we have a roof which specializes in closing leaks, no matter how many fingernails or bamboo slivers it takes. Besides, what a transparent ploy, giving the Booker to Atwood! Atwood IS the Booker; she incarnates it; how can you award it to her? It’s like giving the Nobel to Nobel. Atwood is the prototype of the vaguely leftist, mainstream-feminist Commonwealth novelist for whom the Booker is reserved. Her name is legion: Barbara Kingsolver, Keri Hulme, Nadine Gordimer—these are her handmaids. Kingsolver, nominally American; Hulme, Kiwi; and Gordimer, South African white; all these are drawn like honking geese toward Atwood’s Kanada, spiritual home of all moderate-progressive white folk.

Kanada is the destination of Offred, the heroine of The Handmaid’s Tale, when she flees the Fundamentalist-ruled US. The notion that the Canadian border constitutes sanctuary might seem somewhat risible, since Ontario had considerable trouble repelling an 1867 invasion by forty-odd drunken Fenians armed with broken bottles and sticks. But Atwood refers here, not to a mere traffic jam full of Torontans smuggling home cheap VCRs, but a border between spiritual realms. Hers is a higher Canada, which exists among virtuous, slightly dim middlebrows everywhere in the world. This Greater Canada stretches from the two-square-meter bedrooms of ESL teachers in Kyoto to the jacuzzis of billionaire “progressives” in Malibu.

The scare-stories with which Atwood frigs her readers are distinguished by their foolish irrelevance. Take this alleged masterpiece, The Handmaid’s Tale. A foolish book, it depicts Hell as imagined by an anglo-Canadian mandarin: America ruled by savage uncultured Christians who not only repress all intellectual freedoms but would probably cut funding for genteel novelists. Worst of all, women in this Republic of Gilead are valued solely for their ability to bear children, restricted to the house and excluded from economic activity.

No one who knows anything about the way America works would ever really think that its rulers would want to let silly gender prejudices keep them from creating new consumers, much less let religion get in the way of productivity. The Baptist loonies are suckers to be wooed in election years, no more. They are useful as janitors in peacetime, cannon-fodder in war. Making them into the rulers of a nightmare vision of America is, by a charitable estimation, very naive. If we were to consider it less charitably, it might seem downright suspect. Atwood, who shares about 99.9% of her DNA with America’s real rulers, cannot see them at all, and so fails to notice their hegemony. As she confessed in boasting about her achievement in Handmaid’s Tale, she borrowed horror-stories about the treatment of women in loser countries like Iraq and applied them to the US. Apparently she could not see the horror which really does suffuse American life—a horror which has absolutely nothing to do with that losers’ club, Islam.

Handmaid’s Tale is meant to reassure every wretched office-worker who goes home to a cat, a VCR, and Pizza-for-one that her life is noble and progressive. Handmaid’s Tale is fun horror-fiction for women who work in the American-style cubicle-world precisely because it’s so utterly unrelated to the miseries and terrors of their own lives. No one wants to force middle-class American women to have babies. In fact, it’s almost impossible for them to contemplate having kids, because they’re terrified that it might set them back in their careers, and their rivals in the adjacent cubicles would grab their parking spaces and health plans. Nobody wants to use their bodies. That’s precisely the horror with which they live: no one wants to mate with them because in their world, every single striver must fear every other, and the sort of joint action involved in mating and rearing one’s young is impossible—laughable, a thing which only those who have abandoned the hope of A Career can contemplate. So in their minds, mating and rearing children moves down in class, becoming a thing for rednecks and (though they’ll never say this part out loud) immigrants-of-color. The desire to have children gets bounced outside oneself, onto these lesser beings, and returns, courtesy of Atwood, in demonized form, as the tyranny of procreation, family values and the Patriarchy. It’s the horror they love to fear.

And in the meantime, what has Atwood’s Utopia done, in real political terms? It has managed to distract a whole generation of Americanized women from the real fear and awful loneliness of their office lives. In this way, Atwood’s Canada of the Spirit is, like its real-world counterpart, the good-cop tool, the quaking valet of its Vampire master, America. Atwood’s Canada offers no answer to the Americanized women whose only family is Allie MacBeal and her friends. After all, they’re not rednecks, they’re not Fundamentalists. In fact, the horrible lives of every woman who tries to live out Allie MacBeal is rendered noble by reading Handmaid’s Tale.

So the owners of the cubicles rejoice in the intra-cranial vacations their slaves take in Atwood’s astral Canada. Let them crusade against the Republic of Gilead. Let them invest their wretched slaves’ lives with nobility. The real Republic of Gilead is a matter of dividends, not religion. It would never let the religious obsessions of its cannon-fodder voters interrupt the real business of America—the business carried out in the cubicles. If Allie and Margaret can scatter a cheap glitter over the walls of the cubicles, all the better.

It seems horribly apt that Atwood should win the Booker on the day Bush assumes the presidency. Atwood’s pious, dimwitted, credulous female Canada is the perfect handmaid for Bush’s under-the-table America. Their union is blessed with new offspring every day, every hour. As the coral reefs crumble, the cubicles invade. And everywhere they breed, from Kuala Lumpur to Samara, volumes of Atwood appear like Gideon Bibles at the desks of the corporate handmaids, telling them their lives are blessed.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2#43342614)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 10th, 2019 3:32 PM
Author: Nighttime Cyan Clown

Lmao is this really the story of the show?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2#38368289)



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Date: June 10th, 2019 4:15 PM
Author: Awkward Hissy Fit



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2#38368575)



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Date: June 10th, 2019 4:35 PM
Author: Duck-like laughsome deer antler orchestra pit



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2#38368690)



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Date: June 10th, 2019 4:59 PM
Author: shaky wonderful cuck



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2#38368814)



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Date: January 23rd, 2020 10:13 AM
Author: talented aggressive parlor really tough guy



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2#39475560)



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Date: January 23rd, 2020 10:13 AM
Author: bespoke brunch sex offender



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2#39475562)



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Date: January 23rd, 2020 10:13 AM
Author: Sienna Cracking Bbw



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2#39475565)



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Date: December 1st, 2021 2:11 PM
Author: talented aggressive parlor really tough guy



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2#43540168)



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Date: December 1st, 2021 2:12 PM
Author: Domesticated buck-toothed mood set



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2#43540180)



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Date: December 1st, 2021 2:35 PM
Author: stirring yapping garrison community account



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2#43540344)



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Date: July 1st, 2022 10:43 AM
Author: crimson codepig

This and the "inside a lady's head" one are like bookends.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2#44778169)



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Date: October 1st, 2023 8:48 PM
Author: crimson codepig



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2#46870785)



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Date: February 20th, 2024 2:45 PM
Author: crimson codepig



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2#47420608)



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Date: October 24th, 2024 11:06 PM
Author: crimson codepig



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2#48237576)