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very odd situation occurred at a wedding i was at last weekend

there was a very strange little guy in the corner. he looked...
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Date: July 11th, 2022 8:42 PM
Author: chocolate adventurous kitty sweet tailpipe

there was a very strange little guy in the corner. he looked maybe 5’2”, but then when i saw him closer i noticed he was wearing these giant “moon boots” (i don’t know what else to call them) with like 6 inch soles, so no way he was even five feet in his socks. anyway, he spent most of the reception in the corner hunched over his phone, typing like a maniac and then howling with laughter. most people tried to just ignore him.

when all the speeches and everything started he drew up to the crowd and stood next to me. i was struck by how beautiful his face was; basically like a garden gnome version of jared leto. he looked up and asked if this was “an emotional wedding.” i didn’t really understand what he meant, so just nodded to be polite and he did his crazy laugh again. then the bride and groom started the first dance and he totally lost it. later on everybody was trying to figure out what he meant by screaming “justice” as loud as he could while crying, but i was the closest to him and i would swear he was screaming “duchess,” even though that makes even less sense. he wouldn’t respond to anyone asking him to calm down or leave so one of the groomsmen simply picked him up from under his arms and carried him outside. i went outside later to smoke a cigarette and he was still there. he was sitting on the curb for about two minutes with me watching him and then, i shit you not, he somehow swung his tiny legs over a deer that had wandered by and rode off.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5151447&forum_id=2...id..#44834802)



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Date: July 11th, 2022 10:38 PM
Author: chocolate adventurous kitty sweet tailpipe



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5151447&forum_id=2...id..#44835393)



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Date: July 11th, 2022 10:40 PM
Author: transparent lodge sandwich



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5151447&forum_id=2...id..#44835407)



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Date: July 11th, 2022 10:41 PM
Author: aggressive house



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5151447&forum_id=2...id..#44835413)



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Date: July 12th, 2022 12:15 AM
Author: chocolate adventurous kitty sweet tailpipe



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5151447&forum_id=2...id..#44835797)



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Date: July 12th, 2022 8:13 PM
Author: chocolate adventurous kitty sweet tailpipe



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5151447&forum_id=2...id..#44840314)



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Date: July 12th, 2022 8:17 PM
Author: razzmatazz library



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5151447&forum_id=2...id..#44840325)



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Date: July 12th, 2022 8:21 PM
Author: crystalline juggernaut



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5151447&forum_id=2...id..#44840330)



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Date: July 29th, 2022 9:39 PM
Author: chocolate adventurous kitty sweet tailpipe



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5151447&forum_id=2...id..#44936377)



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Date: July 29th, 2022 9:43 PM
Author: opaque effete hall black woman



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5151447&forum_id=2...id..#44936392)



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Date: July 29th, 2022 9:43 PM
Author: excitant vengeful personal credit line base



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5151447&forum_id=2...id..#44936393)



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Date: July 29th, 2022 9:44 PM
Author: chartreuse provocative preventive strike



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5151447&forum_id=2...id..#44936396)



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Date: July 29th, 2022 9:50 PM
Author: Vibrant Fuchsia Public Bath Persian



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5151447&forum_id=2...id..#44936409)



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Date: July 29th, 2022 10:09 PM
Author: dark abode



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5151447&forum_id=2...id..#44936490)



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Date: July 29th, 2022 10:20 PM
Author: chartreuse provocative preventive strike

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(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5151447&forum_id=2...id..#44936539)



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Date: September 2nd, 2022 2:37 PM
Author: chocolate adventurous kitty sweet tailpipe



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5151447&forum_id=2...id..#45110563)



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Date: September 2nd, 2022 2:39 PM
Author: carnelian plaza



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5151447&forum_id=2...id..#45110574)



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Date: September 2nd, 2022 2:40 PM
Author: histrionic ultramarine death wish sex offender



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5151447&forum_id=2...id..#45110579)



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Date: September 2nd, 2022 2:41 PM
Author: aphrodisiac glassy twinkling uncleanness brunch



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5151447&forum_id=2...id..#45110585)



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Date: May 19th, 2023 11:14 AM
Author: chocolate adventurous kitty sweet tailpipe



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5151447&forum_id=2...id..#46330823)



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Date: May 19th, 2023 11:17 AM
Author: fragrant church building sneaky criminal



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5151447&forum_id=2...id..#46330840)



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Date: December 23rd, 2024 1:12 AM
Author: chocolate adventurous kitty sweet tailpipe



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5151447&forum_id=2...id..#48477480)



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Date: June 2nd, 2025 10:24 AM
Author: chocolate adventurous kitty sweet tailpipe



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5151447&forum_id=2...id..#48980464)



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Date: June 15th, 2026 9:36 AM
Author: Robert Byrd Schitt



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5151447&forum_id=2...id..#49939868)