r/Lawyertalk

1 hr. ago

Chanelgirl09876

How to be less lawyer like outside of work?

Kindness & Support

emoji:snoo_hearteyes:

I have been told by countless people that I talk and communicate like an attorney and it's intimidating and annoying. Does anyone else have this problem and if so, how do you get better?

I'm not even a litigator. I do corporate transactional work. Everyday I read and draft contracts where every single word has meaning. I admit I used to be more adversarial but I have gotten a lot better at being more collaborative with opposing counsels.

My problem isn't with opposing counsels. My problem is the regular people in my life. For instance, my ex-husband will say something that I always or never do, and I immediately go into the mode of laying out detailed evidence of why his statement is not factually correct. It can't be always if I have only done it once in the past year, or it can't be never if I have done it at least once this past year. You get the drift.

And the worst person to talk to is my 13 year old daughter who is me on steroid. She is incredibly smart and will argue with me about everything using logic and my past words and actions against me and why I don't make sense or why I am a hypocrite. So sometimes I find myself getting into these arguments with her and it's really hard for me to back down.

I have one attorney friend who calls me out constantly and laughs and tells me I am talking like a lawyer again and she can see how I can be intimidating to a regular person. But she talks just like me.

Are all lawyers like this? How do I change my communication style to be less lawyer like outside of work? Is this something I can learn in therapy?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5786523&forum_id=2Vannesa#49349615)

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*has sex with husband once a year*

*he claims they "never" have sex*

*she begins laying out detailed evidence explaining why he is factually incorrect*

wonder why she's divorced

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5786523&forum_id=2Vannesa#49349704)