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very sad (or sick!) to see shitlib women furiously masturbate to Handmaid's Tale

ohhhhh i can't believe how timely this is what a warning to ...
Odious lay quadroon
  04/30/18
lmfao
curious boltzmann address
  04/30/18
Its like some William Faulkner level stream of conciousness
anal galvanic travel guidebook
  04/30/18
...
Pink drunken yarmulke ticket booth
  06/09/19
...
Slate Thriller Point Sandwich
  10/13/20
...
magical internet-worthy juggernaut set
  10/28/21
...
fear-inspiring sexy garrison
  04/30/18
...
Bisexual pisswyrm
  04/30/18
WOKE AS FUK
Orchid native
  04/30/18
...
frisky nighttime kitty
  06/24/18
this is scholarship of the highest order. you are now Sir Ri...
Vigorous crackhouse
  06/24/18
...
Lascivious slap-happy home
  06/24/18
...
Blathering Fighting Water Buffalo
  06/24/18
...
Sick adventurous corner boiling water
  10/28/21
180 Joyce
crystalline deranged circlehead trailer park
  06/24/18
unadulterated 180
infuriating heaven coldplay fan
  06/24/18
...
Light chapel mad cow disease
  06/24/18
...
exciting rehab faggot firefighter
  06/24/18
"Binders full of women" in latest episode not flam...
Odious lay quadroon
  06/09/19
YUP. It’s like they got bored of Trump references (...
Pink drunken yarmulke ticket booth
  06/09/19
...
amethyst mood
  06/09/19
this OP is seriously a masterpiece
curious boltzmann address
  06/09/19
...
Slate Thriller Point Sandwich
  06/09/19
...
Slate Thriller Point Sandwich
  12/01/21
...
DrakeMallardxo
  08/24/25
i'm guessing OP's name IRL is jonah
Erotic hominid menage
  06/09/19
this has aged exceedingly well
infuriating heaven coldplay fan
  06/09/19
...
Pink drunken yarmulke ticket booth
  06/09/19
...
Slate Thriller Point Sandwich
  06/10/19
...
boyish chest-beating windowlicker plaza
  06/10/19
you're playing to your audience, fine, but this is clearly w...
nofapping feces stage
  06/10/19
cr. "cock," "pound." but sometimes u ju...
Marvelous meetinghouse indirect expression
  06/10/19
pure praise would mean his talent has nowhere else to go her...
nofapping feces stage
  06/10/19
...
Slate Thriller Point Sandwich
  06/10/19
18000
Drab Background Story
  06/10/19
megan mcardle i think had a good column on how ridiculous th...
Aquamarine Hall Community Account
  06/10/19
John Dolan wrote the GOAT POTUS review... twenty years ago. ...
cerise heady space
  06/10/19
Holy shit, this is great "Handmaid’s Tale is mea...
beady-eyed tattoo jew
  06/10/19
also lol @ VCR.
cerise heady space
  06/10/19
This was written in 2000, but it fits in seamlessly with xo ...
beady-eyed tattoo jew
  06/10/19
This guy is an XO Ted level visionary
boyish chest-beating windowlicker plaza
  06/10/19
...
Floppy buck-toothed international law enforcement agency gas station
  06/10/19
...
boyish chest-beating windowlicker plaza
  06/10/19
lol, whoa
Floppy buck-toothed international law enforcement agency gas station
  06/10/19
holy shit "And in the meantime, what has Atwood&rsqu...
Floppy buck-toothed international law enforcement agency gas station
  06/10/19
...
Slate Thriller Point Sandwich
  06/10/19
...
boyish chest-beating windowlicker plaza
  06/10/19
whoa cr
big house electric furnace
  06/10/19
...
Indecent cracking nursing home
  06/10/19
this is an amazing article
Marvelous meetinghouse indirect expression
  01/23/20
!!!
Sick adventurous corner boiling water
  10/28/21
"wretched office-worker who goes home to a cat" ...
Hyperactive spot ape
  06/10/19
...
Indecent cracking nursing home
  06/10/19
“No one wants to force middle-class American women to ...
boyish chest-beating windowlicker plaza
  06/10/19
The eXile was an early dose of REDPILL for me even though th...
cerise heady space
  06/10/19
...
Floppy buck-toothed international law enforcement agency gas station
  06/10/19
whoah
Marvelous meetinghouse indirect expression
  06/10/19
...
wine motley hell
  06/10/19
holy shit
big house electric furnace
  06/10/19
holy fuck
curious boltzmann address
  06/10/19
Cot damn
Slate Thriller Point Sandwich
  06/10/19
...
Chestnut glittery stock car site
  05/09/21
!!!
Sick adventurous corner boiling water
  10/28/21
this is scholarship
Blue Angry Lettuce Corn Cake
  10/24/24
fatality
sooty whorehouse goyim
  06/10/19
...
amethyst mood
  06/10/19
Does this guy have any thoughts on MAGA?
Pink drunken yarmulke ticket booth
  06/15/19
...
High-end piazza volcanic crater
  10/28/21
...
Sick adventurous corner boiling water
  10/28/21
this is so damn good I'm copy pasting the whole thing: THE ...
High-end piazza volcanic crater
  10/28/21
Lmao is this really the story of the show?
Ivory Cerebral Voyeur
  06/10/19
...
crystalline deranged circlehead trailer park
  06/10/19
...
impressive frum kitty cat messiness
  06/10/19
...
trip cuckold
  06/10/19
...
Slate Thriller Point Sandwich
  01/23/20
...
amethyst mood
  01/23/20
...
charcoal sound barrier
  01/23/20
...
Slate Thriller Point Sandwich
  12/01/21
...
big house electric furnace
  12/01/21
...
Idiotic cuckoldry generalized bond
  12/01/21
This and the "inside a lady's head" one are like b...
Painfully honest indigo theatre
  07/01/22
...
Painfully honest indigo theatre
  10/01/23
...
Painfully honest indigo theatre
  02/20/24
...
Painfully honest indigo theatre
  10/24/24


Poast new message in this thread



Reply Favorite

Date: April 30th, 2018 11:23 AM
Author: Odious lay quadroon

ohhhhh i can't believe how timely this is what a warning to women trying to survive in trump's america so many parallels to modern america i'd never let something like that happen jonah and i already have plans to run away to canada i'd get right in those soldiers faces and tell them they can't oppress my body of course they would try to force me to be a handmaid a very powerful commander would claim me and his wife would not be as hot as me but i'd struggle i'd struggle oh yes even though they would overpower me and he'd ravage me with his big commander cock he'd pound me and pound me and there'd be nothing i could do oh no oh no but i'd scratch and claw except his wife would hold me down that bitch she'd resent me for making him cum in my womb and give him beautiful children he'd sneak me goodies and treats and show me off at jezebels that sick patriarchal bastard but jonah wouldn't be able to find me i'd have to move on and be strong and live for me and my children and eventually i'd seduce the commander so good that he helps me become his real wife and we'd have the power then so i could help people fuck trump for trying to put this in practice pretty much an owners manual for him and pence those fuckers they'll never get to fuck me

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2Vannesa#35949672)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 30th, 2018 11:28 AM
Author: curious boltzmann address

lmfao

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2Vannesa#35949690)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 30th, 2018 11:30 AM
Author: anal galvanic travel guidebook

Its like some William Faulkner level stream of conciousness

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2Vannesa#35949706)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 9th, 2019 11:28 PM
Author: Pink drunken yarmulke ticket booth



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2Vannesa#38365108)



Reply Favorite

Date: October 13th, 2020 12:49 PM
Author: Slate Thriller Point Sandwich



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2Vannesa#41103220)



Reply Favorite

Date: October 28th, 2021 5:28 AM
Author: magical internet-worthy juggernaut set



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2Vannesa#43342786)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 30th, 2018 11:31 AM
Author: fear-inspiring sexy garrison



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2Vannesa#35949712)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 30th, 2018 11:33 AM
Author: Bisexual pisswyrm



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2Vannesa#35949736)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 30th, 2018 11:35 AM
Author: Orchid native

WOKE AS FUK

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2Vannesa#35949749)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 24th, 2018 7:47 PM
Author: frisky nighttime kitty



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2Vannesa#36303022)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 24th, 2018 7:48 PM
Author: Vigorous crackhouse

this is scholarship of the highest order. you are now Sir Risten.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2Vannesa#36303030)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 24th, 2018 7:50 PM
Author: Lascivious slap-happy home



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2Vannesa#36303036)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 24th, 2018 7:56 PM
Author: Blathering Fighting Water Buffalo



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2Vannesa#36303065)



Reply Favorite

Date: October 28th, 2021 12:18 AM
Author: Sick adventurous corner boiling water



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2Vannesa#43342024)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 24th, 2018 7:53 PM
Author: crystalline deranged circlehead trailer park

180 Joyce

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2Vannesa#36303053)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 24th, 2018 7:57 PM
Author: infuriating heaven coldplay fan

unadulterated 180

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2Vannesa#36303071)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 24th, 2018 7:58 PM
Author: Light chapel mad cow disease



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2Vannesa#36303081)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 24th, 2018 8:05 PM
Author: exciting rehab faggot firefighter



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2Vannesa#36303131)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 9th, 2019 10:31 PM
Author: Odious lay quadroon

"Binders full of women" in latest episode not flame

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2Vannesa#38364783)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 9th, 2019 11:29 PM
Author: Pink drunken yarmulke ticket booth

YUP.

It’s like they got bored of Trump references (did you also catch the lesbian refugee demanding not to be separated from the unrelated infant she was carrying?) and so decided to throw in a Romney dig for old time’s sake.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2Vannesa#38365120)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 9th, 2019 10:32 PM
Author: amethyst mood



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2Vannesa#38364791)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 9th, 2019 10:36 PM
Author: curious boltzmann address

this OP is seriously a masterpiece

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2Vannesa#38364811)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 9th, 2019 10:40 PM
Author: Slate Thriller Point Sandwich



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2Vannesa#38364852)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 1st, 2021 2:31 PM
Author: Slate Thriller Point Sandwich



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2Vannesa#43540325)



Reply Favorite

Date: August 24th, 2025 11:59 AM
Author: DrakeMallardxo (🦆)



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2Vannesa#49208954)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 9th, 2019 10:39 PM
Author: Erotic hominid menage

i'm guessing OP's name IRL is jonah

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2Vannesa#38364835)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 9th, 2019 10:52 PM
Author: infuriating heaven coldplay fan

this has aged exceedingly well

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2Vannesa#38364924)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 9th, 2019 11:30 PM
Author: Pink drunken yarmulke ticket booth



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2Vannesa#38365122)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 10th, 2019 12:01 PM
Author: Slate Thriller Point Sandwich



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2Vannesa#38366924)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 10th, 2019 3:40 PM
Author: boyish chest-beating windowlicker plaza



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2Vannesa#38368355)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 10th, 2019 12:05 PM
Author: nofapping feces stage

you're playing to your audience, fine, but this is clearly written by a man

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2Vannesa#38366957)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 10th, 2019 3:33 PM
Author: Marvelous meetinghouse indirect expression

cr. "cock," "pound." but sometimes u just let it slide you know?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2Vannesa#38368292)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 10th, 2019 4:34 PM
Author: nofapping feces stage

pure praise would mean his talent has nowhere else to go here

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2Vannesa#38368687)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 10th, 2019 3:16 PM
Author: Slate Thriller Point Sandwich



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2Vannesa#38368206)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 10th, 2019 3:28 PM
Author: Drab Background Story

18000

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2Vannesa#38368272)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 10th, 2019 3:29 PM
Author: Aquamarine Hall Community Account

megan mcardle i think had a good column on how ridiculous the handmaid's tale is happening! meme is

https://www.bloomberg.com/opinion/articles/2017-04-25/no-the-handmaid-s-tale-is-not-unexpectedly-timely

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2Vannesa#38368275)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 10th, 2019 3:33 PM
Author: cerise heady space

John Dolan wrote the GOAT POTUS review... twenty years ago.

http://exiledonline.com/old-exile/vault/books/review103.html

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2Vannesa#38368294)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 10th, 2019 3:37 PM
Author: beady-eyed tattoo jew

Holy shit, this is great

"Handmaid’s Tale is meant to reassure every wretched office-worker who goes home to a cat, a VCR, and Pizza-for-one that her life is noble and progressive."

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2Vannesa#38368320)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 10th, 2019 3:38 PM
Author: cerise heady space

also lol @ VCR.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2Vannesa#38368327)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 10th, 2019 3:42 PM
Author: beady-eyed tattoo jew

This was written in 2000, but it fits in seamlessly with xo themes on GC and shrewdom. A true visionary.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2Vannesa#38368374)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 10th, 2019 3:47 PM
Author: boyish chest-beating windowlicker plaza

This guy is an XO Ted level visionary

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2Vannesa#38368393)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 10th, 2019 3:48 PM
Author: Floppy buck-toothed international law enforcement agency gas station



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2Vannesa#38368400)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 10th, 2019 3:41 PM
Author: boyish chest-beating windowlicker plaza



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2Vannesa#38368361)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 10th, 2019 3:42 PM
Author: Floppy buck-toothed international law enforcement agency gas station

lol, whoa

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2Vannesa#38368367)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 10th, 2019 3:44 PM
Author: Floppy buck-toothed international law enforcement agency gas station

holy shit

"And in the meantime, what has Atwood’s Utopia done, in real political terms? It has managed to distract a whole generation of Americanized women from the real fear and awful loneliness of their office lives. In this way, Atwood’s Canada of the Spirit is, like its real-world counterpart, the good-cop tool, the quaking valet of its Vampire master, America. Atwood’s Canada offers no answer to the Americanized women whose only family is Allie MacBeal and her friends. After all, they’re not rednecks, they’re not Fundamentalists. In fact, the horrible lives of every woman who tries to live out Allie MacBeal is rendered noble by reading Handmaid’s Tale. "

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2Vannesa#38368382)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 10th, 2019 3:45 PM
Author: Slate Thriller Point Sandwich



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2Vannesa#38368388)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 10th, 2019 3:46 PM
Author: boyish chest-beating windowlicker plaza



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2Vannesa#38368391)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 10th, 2019 4:11 PM
Author: big house electric furnace

whoa cr

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2Vannesa#38368548)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 10th, 2019 5:01 PM
Author: Indecent cracking nursing home



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2Vannesa#38368821)



Reply Favorite

Date: January 23rd, 2020 10:16 AM
Author: Marvelous meetinghouse indirect expression

this is an amazing article

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2Vannesa#39475589)



Reply Favorite

Date: October 28th, 2021 12:14 AM
Author: Sick adventurous corner boiling water

!!!

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2Vannesa#43341991)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 10th, 2019 3:47 PM
Author: Hyperactive spot ape

"wretched office-worker who goes home to a cat"

imo this guy should get credit for identifying the modern shrew

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2Vannesa#38368399)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 10th, 2019 4:59 PM
Author: Indecent cracking nursing home



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2Vannesa#38368816)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 10th, 2019 3:45 PM
Author: boyish chest-beating windowlicker plaza

“No one wants to force middle-class American women to have babies. In fact, it’s almost impossible for them to contemplate having kids, because they’re terrified that it might set them back in their careers, and their rivals in the adjacent cubicles would grab their parking spaces and health plans. Nobody wants to use their bodies. That’s precisely the horror with which they live: no one wants to mate with them because in their world, every single striver must fear every other, and the sort of joint action involved in mating and rearing one’s young is impossible—laughable, a thing which only those who have abandoned the hope of A Career can contemplate. So in their minds, mating and rearing children moves down in class, becoming a thing for rednecks and (though they’ll never say this part out loud) immigrants-of-col”

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2Vannesa#38368389)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 10th, 2019 3:47 PM
Author: cerise heady space

The eXile was an early dose of REDPILL for me even though the writes are all lefty degenerates.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2Vannesa#38368394)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 10th, 2019 3:47 PM
Author: Floppy buck-toothed international law enforcement agency gas station



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2Vannesa#38368397)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 10th, 2019 3:58 PM
Author: Marvelous meetinghouse indirect expression

whoah

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2Vannesa#38368476)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 10th, 2019 4:09 PM
Author: wine motley hell



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2Vannesa#38368537)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 10th, 2019 4:12 PM
Author: big house electric furnace

holy shit

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2Vannesa#38368558)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 10th, 2019 4:46 PM
Author: curious boltzmann address

holy fuck

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2Vannesa#38368731)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 10th, 2019 5:28 PM
Author: Slate Thriller Point Sandwich

Cot damn

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2Vannesa#38368965)



Reply Favorite

Date: May 9th, 2021 3:27 PM
Author: Chestnut glittery stock car site



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2Vannesa#42430424)



Reply Favorite

Date: October 28th, 2021 12:15 AM
Author: Sick adventurous corner boiling water

!!!

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2Vannesa#43341997)



Reply Favorite

Date: October 24th, 2024 11:17 PM
Author: Blue Angry Lettuce Corn Cake

this is scholarship

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2Vannesa#48237594)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 10th, 2019 4:05 PM
Author: sooty whorehouse goyim

fatality

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2Vannesa#38368513)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 10th, 2019 5:56 PM
Author: amethyst mood



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2Vannesa#38369105)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 15th, 2019 2:37 PM
Author: Pink drunken yarmulke ticket booth

Does this guy have any thoughts on MAGA?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2Vannesa#38393148)



Reply Favorite

Date: October 28th, 2021 12:05 AM
Author: High-end piazza volcanic crater



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2Vannesa#43341948)



Reply Favorite

Date: October 28th, 2021 12:15 AM
Author: Sick adventurous corner boiling water



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2Vannesa#43342001)



Reply Favorite

Date: October 28th, 2021 3:46 AM
Author: High-end piazza volcanic crater

this is so damn good I'm copy pasting the whole thing:

THE WINNER OF THE MARK DAVID CHAPMAN LITERARY PRIZE:

#1: Canadian Women ou Les Hoes Canucqois

By John Dolan

Just as I was finishing this column naming Margaret Atwood the Queen of Dunces, I heard she’d won this year’s Booker Prize. Once again, the mainstream press tries to scoop the eXile! There must be a leak somewhere in our ranks. Luckily, we have a roof which specializes in closing leaks, no matter how many fingernails or bamboo slivers it takes. Besides, what a transparent ploy, giving the Booker to Atwood! Atwood IS the Booker; she incarnates it; how can you award it to her? It’s like giving the Nobel to Nobel. Atwood is the prototype of the vaguely leftist, mainstream-feminist Commonwealth novelist for whom the Booker is reserved. Her name is legion: Barbara Kingsolver, Keri Hulme, Nadine Gordimer—these are her handmaids. Kingsolver, nominally American; Hulme, Kiwi; and Gordimer, South African white; all these are drawn like honking geese toward Atwood’s Kanada, spiritual home of all moderate-progressive white folk.

Kanada is the destination of Offred, the heroine of The Handmaid’s Tale, when she flees the Fundamentalist-ruled US. The notion that the Canadian border constitutes sanctuary might seem somewhat risible, since Ontario had considerable trouble repelling an 1867 invasion by forty-odd drunken Fenians armed with broken bottles and sticks. But Atwood refers here, not to a mere traffic jam full of Torontans smuggling home cheap VCRs, but a border between spiritual realms. Hers is a higher Canada, which exists among virtuous, slightly dim middlebrows everywhere in the world. This Greater Canada stretches from the two-square-meter bedrooms of ESL teachers in Kyoto to the jacuzzis of billionaire “progressives” in Malibu.

The scare-stories with which Atwood frigs her readers are distinguished by their foolish irrelevance. Take this alleged masterpiece, The Handmaid’s Tale. A foolish book, it depicts Hell as imagined by an anglo-Canadian mandarin: America ruled by savage uncultured Christians who not only repress all intellectual freedoms but would probably cut funding for genteel novelists. Worst of all, women in this Republic of Gilead are valued solely for their ability to bear children, restricted to the house and excluded from economic activity.

No one who knows anything about the way America works would ever really think that its rulers would want to let silly gender prejudices keep them from creating new consumers, much less let religion get in the way of productivity. The Baptist loonies are suckers to be wooed in election years, no more. They are useful as janitors in peacetime, cannon-fodder in war. Making them into the rulers of a nightmare vision of America is, by a charitable estimation, very naive. If we were to consider it less charitably, it might seem downright suspect. Atwood, who shares about 99.9% of her DNA with America’s real rulers, cannot see them at all, and so fails to notice their hegemony. As she confessed in boasting about her achievement in Handmaid’s Tale, she borrowed horror-stories about the treatment of women in loser countries like Iraq and applied them to the US. Apparently she could not see the horror which really does suffuse American life—a horror which has absolutely nothing to do with that losers’ club, Islam.

Handmaid’s Tale is meant to reassure every wretched office-worker who goes home to a cat, a VCR, and Pizza-for-one that her life is noble and progressive. Handmaid’s Tale is fun horror-fiction for women who work in the American-style cubicle-world precisely because it’s so utterly unrelated to the miseries and terrors of their own lives. No one wants to force middle-class American women to have babies. In fact, it’s almost impossible for them to contemplate having kids, because they’re terrified that it might set them back in their careers, and their rivals in the adjacent cubicles would grab their parking spaces and health plans. Nobody wants to use their bodies. That’s precisely the horror with which they live: no one wants to mate with them because in their world, every single striver must fear every other, and the sort of joint action involved in mating and rearing one’s young is impossible—laughable, a thing which only those who have abandoned the hope of A Career can contemplate. So in their minds, mating and rearing children moves down in class, becoming a thing for rednecks and (though they’ll never say this part out loud) immigrants-of-color. The desire to have children gets bounced outside oneself, onto these lesser beings, and returns, courtesy of Atwood, in demonized form, as the tyranny of procreation, family values and the Patriarchy. It’s the horror they love to fear.

And in the meantime, what has Atwood’s Utopia done, in real political terms? It has managed to distract a whole generation of Americanized women from the real fear and awful loneliness of their office lives. In this way, Atwood’s Canada of the Spirit is, like its real-world counterpart, the good-cop tool, the quaking valet of its Vampire master, America. Atwood’s Canada offers no answer to the Americanized women whose only family is Allie MacBeal and her friends. After all, they’re not rednecks, they’re not Fundamentalists. In fact, the horrible lives of every woman who tries to live out Allie MacBeal is rendered noble by reading Handmaid’s Tale.

So the owners of the cubicles rejoice in the intra-cranial vacations their slaves take in Atwood’s astral Canada. Let them crusade against the Republic of Gilead. Let them invest their wretched slaves’ lives with nobility. The real Republic of Gilead is a matter of dividends, not religion. It would never let the religious obsessions of its cannon-fodder voters interrupt the real business of America—the business carried out in the cubicles. If Allie and Margaret can scatter a cheap glitter over the walls of the cubicles, all the better.

It seems horribly apt that Atwood should win the Booker on the day Bush assumes the presidency. Atwood’s pious, dimwitted, credulous female Canada is the perfect handmaid for Bush’s under-the-table America. Their union is blessed with new offspring every day, every hour. As the coral reefs crumble, the cubicles invade. And everywhere they breed, from Kuala Lumpur to Samara, volumes of Atwood appear like Gideon Bibles at the desks of the corporate handmaids, telling them their lives are blessed.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2Vannesa#43342614)



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Date: June 10th, 2019 3:32 PM
Author: Ivory Cerebral Voyeur

Lmao is this really the story of the show?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2Vannesa#38368289)



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Date: June 10th, 2019 4:15 PM
Author: crystalline deranged circlehead trailer park



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2Vannesa#38368575)



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Date: June 10th, 2019 4:35 PM
Author: impressive frum kitty cat messiness



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2Vannesa#38368690)



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Date: June 10th, 2019 4:59 PM
Author: trip cuckold



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2Vannesa#38368814)



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Date: January 23rd, 2020 10:13 AM
Author: Slate Thriller Point Sandwich



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2Vannesa#39475560)



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Date: January 23rd, 2020 10:13 AM
Author: amethyst mood



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2Vannesa#39475562)



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Date: January 23rd, 2020 10:13 AM
Author: charcoal sound barrier



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2Vannesa#39475565)



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Date: December 1st, 2021 2:11 PM
Author: Slate Thriller Point Sandwich



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2Vannesa#43540168)



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Date: December 1st, 2021 2:12 PM
Author: big house electric furnace



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2Vannesa#43540180)



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Date: December 1st, 2021 2:35 PM
Author: Idiotic cuckoldry generalized bond



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2Vannesa#43540344)



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Date: July 1st, 2022 10:43 AM
Author: Painfully honest indigo theatre

This and the "inside a lady's head" one are like bookends.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2Vannesa#44778169)



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Date: October 1st, 2023 8:48 PM
Author: Painfully honest indigo theatre



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2Vannesa#46870785)



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Date: February 20th, 2024 2:45 PM
Author: Painfully honest indigo theatre



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2Vannesa#47420608)



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Date: October 24th, 2024 11:06 PM
Author: Painfully honest indigo theatre



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3963985&forum_id=2Vannesa#48237576)