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Twas the Night Before Christmas (Peterman version)

'Twas the night before Christmas, when all through the J ...
overrated chest-beating fortuitous meteor
  12/03/18
...
overrated chest-beating fortuitous meteor
  12/03/18
TLDR but clearly you spent a lot of time on this, plz enjoy ...
Glittery heaven liquid oxygen
  12/03/18
ty!
overrated chest-beating fortuitous meteor
  12/03/18
jfc, this was 180. This is why I continue to visit this d...
Nubile Corner
  12/03/18
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Vigorous Duck-like House Chad
  12/24/21
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Fragrant indian lodge windowlicker
  12/03/18
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Sticky home gaping
  12/03/18
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Cracking azure sanctuary
  12/03/18
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Walnut Indecent Degenerate Stage
  12/03/18
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Nubile Corner
  12/03/18
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overrated chest-beating fortuitous meteor
  12/07/18
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cerise marketing idea
  12/07/18
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dark locale goyim
  12/07/18
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medicated parlor hissy fit
  12/07/18
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brass exciting roommate
  12/07/18
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overrated chest-beating fortuitous meteor
  12/14/18
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crusty effete field associate
  12/14/18
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overrated chest-beating fortuitous meteor
  12/24/18
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Fragrant indian lodge windowlicker
  12/24/18
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Hyperactive amethyst quadroon halford
  12/24/18
To be fair, What—a Jew lampooning Christmas in a vu...
nofapping judgmental dilemma kitty
  12/24/18
120
hairraiser public bath
  12/24/18
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overrated chest-beating fortuitous meteor
  12/24/18
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hairraiser public bath
  12/24/18
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adventurous territorial fanboi
  12/24/18
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overrated chest-beating fortuitous meteor
  12/24/18
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Marvelous cuckold national
  12/24/18
Artistic gold tyvmft
up-to-no-good bawdyhouse death wish
  12/24/18
...
overrated chest-beating fortuitous meteor
  12/16/21
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aromatic hunting ground
  12/24/18
...
free-loading lascivious university sex offender
  12/24/18
this was pretty good, nice work
scarlet abusive azn idea he suggested
  12/24/18
~*Christmas in July bump*~
overrated chest-beating fortuitous meteor
  07/01/19
...
Fragrant indian lodge windowlicker
  07/01/19
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Fragrant indian lodge windowlicker
  07/01/19
Early December Bump
overrated chest-beating fortuitous meteor
  12/10/19
getting close...
overrated chest-beating fortuitous meteor
  12/20/19
ding ding ding
overrated chest-beating fortuitous meteor
  12/24/19
...
motley frum persian locus
  12/24/19
...
overrated chest-beating fortuitous meteor
  12/24/19
...
Pale codepig
  12/24/19
This deserves more bumps.
Disgusting Irradiated Friendly Grandma
  12/24/19
...
Crawly private investor school cafeteria
  12/24/19
lost it at 8 tiny trans queers. still unmitigated 180
up-to-no-good bawdyhouse death wish
  12/24/19
lol
overrated chest-beating fortuitous meteor
  12/24/19
This
Vigorous Duck-like House Chad
  12/24/21
Missed this the first time. Great work dude. 180
Sapphire immigrant
  12/24/19
ty, labor of love
overrated chest-beating fortuitous meteor
  12/24/19
...
bronze really tough guy
  12/24/19
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overrated chest-beating fortuitous meteor
  12/24/19
lube up your chimneys!
overrated chest-beating fortuitous meteor
  12/24/19
pure gold 180
Vigorous Duck-like House Chad
  12/24/19
...
overrated chest-beating fortuitous meteor
  12/24/19
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fishy vibrant station
  12/24/19
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overrated chest-beating fortuitous meteor
  12/15/20
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overrated chest-beating fortuitous meteor
  12/23/20
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Razzle-dazzle Keepsake Machete Incel
  12/24/20
It's time.
overrated chest-beating fortuitous meteor
  12/24/20
...
dark locale goyim
  12/24/20
...
overrated chest-beating fortuitous meteor
  12/16/21
...
adventurous territorial fanboi
  12/16/21
...
Razzle-dazzle Keepsake Machete Incel
  12/16/21
Chri$tmas $pirit
overrated chest-beating fortuitous meteor
  12/20/21
Lmao
excitant church building travel guidebook
  12/20/21
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overrated chest-beating fortuitous meteor
  12/22/21
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excitant church building travel guidebook
  12/22/21
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Know-it-all garnet useless brakes juggernaut
  12/24/21
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Vigorous Duck-like House Chad
  12/25/23
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grown men with poopy butt cracks
  12/25/25
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nude butt cheeks
  12/25/25
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constantscreen the great
  12/25/25


Poast new message in this thread



Reply Favorite

Date: December 3rd, 2018 12:45 PM
Author: overrated chest-beating fortuitous meteor

'Twas the night before Christmas, when all through the J

Lots of truckers were hungry, much like any old day;

The rig pigs were hung, taking dick pics with care,

In hopes that St. Peterman soon would be there;

The truckers were horny, dicks throbbing and red ,

While visions of Peter’s plums danced in their heads;

And Earl in his 'kerchief, and I in my cap,

Had just settled down longing for Peterman’s gap,

When out on the lot there arose such a clatter,

I sprang from the truck to see what was the matter.

Away to the lot I flew like a flash,

Tore open my zipper in hope of fresh gash.

The moon on the breast of the softly lit J

Made the lot lizards glow, all looking to play,

When, what to my wandering eyes should appear,

But a beady-eyed Peterman, and eight tiny trans-queers,

With a little old driver, so lively and quick,

I knew in a moment this night would be sick.

More rapid than eagles out their trousers they came,

And he whistled, and shouted, and called them by name;

"Now, FLASHER! now, DANCER! now, PRANCER and VIXEN!

On, ROCKET ! on CUPID! on, BONER and SHITZEN!

To the back of the truck! to the top of the wall!

Now suck away! suck away! fuck away all!"

As lubed holes that before the wild hurricane fly,

When they meet with a cock, were mounted to the sky,

So up to the truck-stops the trans-queers they flew,

With the sleigh full of boys, and St. Peterman too.

And then, in a twinkling, I heard on the roof

The prancing and pawing of each little poof.

As he jerked with his hand, and was turning around,

“Stuff my chimney!” said St. Peterman on the ground.

He was dressed all in latex, from his head to his foot,

His knees were all tarnished with ashes and soot;

A bundle of dildos he had flung on his back,

And he looked like a peddler just lifting his sac.

His eyes -- how they twinkled! his dimples how merry!

His cheeks were like roses, his boihole like a cherry!

His droll little mouth was drawn up like a bow,

And the beard of his chin had cum white as snow;

The stump of my pipe he held tight in his teeth,

And his lips did encircle its head like a wreath;

He had a broad face and a little round belly,

His broad backside shook like a bowlful of jelly.

He was chubby and plump, a right jolly old elf,

And I laughed when I saw him, in spite of myself;

A wink of his eye and a twist of his head,

Soon gave me to know I had nothing to dread;

He spoke not a word, but went straight to his work,

We filled all their “stockings” and had circle jerks,

And laying his finger aside of his nose,

A huge snort of cocaine billowed up and rose;

Then he sprang to his sleigh, to his team gave a whistle,

And away they all pranced like the down of a thistle.

But I heard him exclaim, as he drove out of sight,

"HAPPY CHRISTMAS TO ALL, CASH AND CHECKS ARE ALL-RIGHT!"

Happy December, Merry Christmas & Happy New Year.

Upset Jew, 12-03-2018



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2most#37342568)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 3rd, 2018 3:00 PM
Author: overrated chest-beating fortuitous meteor



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2most#37343357)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 3rd, 2018 3:04 PM
Author: Glittery heaven liquid oxygen

TLDR but clearly you spent a lot of time on this, plz enjoy this pity bump as my Chanukah present to you

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2most#37343380)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 3rd, 2018 3:10 PM
Author: overrated chest-beating fortuitous meteor

ty!

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2most#37343413)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 3rd, 2018 3:16 PM
Author: Nubile Corner

jfc, this was 180.

This is why I continue to visit this demented chatbort.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2most#37343471)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 24th, 2021 4:53 PM
Author: Vigorous Duck-like House Chad



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2most#43670143)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 3rd, 2018 3:17 PM
Author: Fragrant indian lodge windowlicker



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2most#37343477)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 3rd, 2018 3:18 PM
Author: Sticky home gaping



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2most#37343484)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 3rd, 2018 3:22 PM
Author: Cracking azure sanctuary



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2most#37343509)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 3rd, 2018 3:22 PM
Author: Walnut Indecent Degenerate Stage



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2most#37343515)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 3rd, 2018 3:26 PM
Author: Nubile Corner



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2most#37343539)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 7th, 2018 11:35 AM
Author: overrated chest-beating fortuitous meteor



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2most#37367063)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 7th, 2018 11:39 AM
Author: cerise marketing idea



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2most#37367091)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 7th, 2018 11:50 AM
Author: dark locale goyim



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2most#37367151)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 7th, 2018 11:52 AM
Author: medicated parlor hissy fit



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2most#37367159)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 7th, 2018 11:55 AM
Author: brass exciting roommate



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2most#37367178)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 14th, 2018 12:12 PM
Author: overrated chest-beating fortuitous meteor



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2most#37407273)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 14th, 2018 12:15 PM
Author: crusty effete field associate



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2most#37407292)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 24th, 2018 8:40 AM
Author: overrated chest-beating fortuitous meteor



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2most#37462610)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 24th, 2018 8:40 AM
Author: Fragrant indian lodge windowlicker



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2most#37462612)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 24th, 2018 8:41 AM
Author: Hyperactive amethyst quadroon halford



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2most#37462615)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 24th, 2018 8:44 AM
Author: nofapping judgmental dilemma kitty

To be fair,

What—a Jew lampooning Christmas in a vulgar and sexually explicit manner for “laughs”? Why I’ve never

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2most#37462619)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 24th, 2018 8:52 AM
Author: hairraiser public bath

120

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2most#37462646)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 24th, 2018 7:44 PM
Author: overrated chest-beating fortuitous meteor



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2most#37465688)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 24th, 2018 8:47 AM
Author: hairraiser public bath



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2most#37462629)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 24th, 2018 8:54 AM
Author: adventurous territorial fanboi



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2most#37462649)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 24th, 2018 9:46 AM
Author: overrated chest-beating fortuitous meteor



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2most#37462815)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 24th, 2018 8:02 PM
Author: Marvelous cuckold national



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2most#37465757)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 24th, 2018 9:27 PM
Author: up-to-no-good bawdyhouse death wish

Artistic gold tyvmft

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2most#37466002)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 16th, 2021 12:45 PM
Author: overrated chest-beating fortuitous meteor



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2most#43619656)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 24th, 2018 9:30 PM
Author: aromatic hunting ground



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2most#37466012)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 24th, 2018 9:35 PM
Author: free-loading lascivious university sex offender



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2most#37466032)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 24th, 2018 9:38 PM
Author: scarlet abusive azn idea he suggested

this was pretty good, nice work

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2most#37466049)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 1st, 2019 5:53 PM
Author: overrated chest-beating fortuitous meteor

~*Christmas in July bump*~

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2most#38469719)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 1st, 2019 5:53 PM
Author: Fragrant indian lodge windowlicker



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2most#38469721)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 1st, 2019 5:53 PM
Author: Fragrant indian lodge windowlicker



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2most#38469720)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 10th, 2019 9:37 AM
Author: overrated chest-beating fortuitous meteor

Early December Bump

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2most#39241607)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 20th, 2019 12:21 PM
Author: overrated chest-beating fortuitous meteor

getting close...

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2most#39297740)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 24th, 2019 12:18 AM
Author: overrated chest-beating fortuitous meteor

ding ding ding

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2most#39316620)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 24th, 2019 12:38 AM
Author: motley frum persian locus



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2most#39316668)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 24th, 2019 8:42 AM
Author: overrated chest-beating fortuitous meteor



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2most#39317383)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 24th, 2019 8:49 AM
Author: Pale codepig



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2most#39317409)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 24th, 2019 8:52 AM
Author: Disgusting Irradiated Friendly Grandma

This deserves more bumps.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2most#39317415)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 24th, 2019 9:07 AM
Author: Crawly private investor school cafeteria



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2most#39317493)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 24th, 2019 9:14 AM
Author: up-to-no-good bawdyhouse death wish

lost it at 8 tiny trans queers. still unmitigated 180

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2most#39317523)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 24th, 2019 10:57 AM
Author: overrated chest-beating fortuitous meteor

lol

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2most#39318060)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 24th, 2021 4:54 PM
Author: Vigorous Duck-like House Chad

This

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2most#43670148)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 24th, 2019 9:30 AM
Author: Sapphire immigrant

Missed this the first time. Great work dude.

180

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2most#39317610)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 24th, 2019 10:58 AM
Author: overrated chest-beating fortuitous meteor

ty, labor of love

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2most#39318062)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 24th, 2019 11:02 AM
Author: bronze really tough guy



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2most#39318085)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 24th, 2019 11:51 AM
Author: overrated chest-beating fortuitous meteor



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2most#39318318)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 24th, 2019 1:48 PM
Author: overrated chest-beating fortuitous meteor

lube up your chimneys!

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2most#39318901)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 24th, 2019 4:19 PM
Author: Vigorous Duck-like House Chad

pure gold 180

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2most#39319682)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 24th, 2019 5:57 PM
Author: overrated chest-beating fortuitous meteor



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2most#39320155)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 24th, 2019 4:29 PM
Author: fishy vibrant station



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2most#39319749)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 15th, 2020 2:54 PM
Author: overrated chest-beating fortuitous meteor



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2most#41553760)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 23rd, 2020 1:37 PM
Author: overrated chest-beating fortuitous meteor



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2most#41603653)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 24th, 2020 8:07 AM
Author: Razzle-dazzle Keepsake Machete Incel



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2most#41608882)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 24th, 2020 1:14 PM
Author: overrated chest-beating fortuitous meteor

It's time.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2most#41610330)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 24th, 2020 1:19 PM
Author: dark locale goyim



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2most#41610375)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 16th, 2021 10:44 AM
Author: overrated chest-beating fortuitous meteor



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2most#43618689)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 16th, 2021 11:32 AM
Author: adventurous territorial fanboi



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2most#43619119)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 16th, 2021 11:34 AM
Author: Razzle-dazzle Keepsake Machete Incel



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2most#43619130)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 20th, 2021 12:21 PM
Author: overrated chest-beating fortuitous meteor

Chri$tmas $pirit

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2most#43643241)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 20th, 2021 12:27 PM
Author: excitant church building travel guidebook

Lmao

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2most#43643299)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 22nd, 2021 5:59 PM
Author: overrated chest-beating fortuitous meteor



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2most#43658914)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 22nd, 2021 6:53 PM
Author: excitant church building travel guidebook



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2most#43659259)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 24th, 2021 4:49 PM
Author: Know-it-all garnet useless brakes juggernaut



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2most#43670127)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 25th, 2023 11:04 AM
Author: Vigorous Duck-like House Chad



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2most#47211358)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 25th, 2025 2:14 AM
Author: grown men with poopy butt cracks



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2most#49538706)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 25th, 2025 8:10 AM
Author: nude butt cheeks (✅🍑)



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2most#49538932)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 25th, 2025 8:14 AM
Author: constantscreen the great



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2most#49538935)